Ep 614 - iNasty

Wow, wow, Wes. It's time to go. It's time to face. You got to face up to the nasty things you said. Yeah, man. You know, we're finding out we're finding out his brothers. You live it by the I nasty. You die by the I nasty. It's true. It's the worst. It's the worst. We were truly peak I nasty between 2016 and 2019. The nasty brothers. And now as an adult man, you got to really come. I think I think it's radon poisoning. We're in the basement. True. You're in the basement. You're breathing in radon. You start going like that guy's not that funny. I'm funnier. Yeah, we were actually the one on TV. I would be mad at people's like late night sets. I would see like a woman do a fucking Conan set and I'd be like, fucking bitch. Why do I care? Just what happens, dude. It is what happens. I mean, my thing is, I'll never forget like I remember which is like working, being a young man and being like, I need to get a job and establish myself in the world. And I would like work at LA fitness for like 30 minutes and like go out to my car and cry. It's so grim. It's so hard. It's a nasty. So if you have the outlet, dude, yeah, I wish to go I nasty on YouTube. I would just see a video of like a guy like recording a swim meet. And I'd be like, pedophile, weirdo. He'd be like, Hey, this is my family channel. I want to make pedophile 10 likes. Yes. Yeah. Let's go. Yeah. Be careful with all the I nasty warriors out there. No, man. Eventually you're going to have to face who you were nasty to. And then you're going to go, man, I was being such a bitch. Dude, I'm so sorry. The worst is when you don't even remember. Yeah. I'll get, I'll see stuff and I'll be like, huh? I've never said I'm like, oh, fuck. I don't remember. I don't even remember that. Yeah. When I got fired for being I nasty, I was like, nah. I would never say that. It happens. Anyway, here's the most important piece of information that the people are dying to find out the, the Renz. The Renz did hatch and I was lucky enough to be outside. It was, it was a beautiful day. I was on my laptop. I was going over the roast jokes, which is a funny thing to sit outside. So funny to sit, take a laptop out, get a coffee, sit outside. It's like beautiful out and then just be like, Sheryl Underwood's husband is dead. There's new life emerging around you. But then I watched the baby come out of the Bud Lightbox. He jumped out of the top and while I'm out there, I keep good track of the mom and dad. You do. I knew both of them were gone. So I see some, some rustling going on in the Bud Lightbox. And I go, I hit a mccusk. And then I watched the guy come out. He was bigger than I thought it'd be. Really? Yeah, they're pretty fucking thick. And, but he was, he was a fluffy. Oh, he had like fluffy feathers. I watched him jump. He started like hopping around as soon as he came out, the mom and dad came right back and started like hopping around him while he was trying to like, what? It was, I was so happy. Oh my God. Then I go to the airport to pick up McKeever. I come back and he was dead in the pool. No. No. And McKeever and Blizz were here. So I had to pretend I wasn't going to cry. I got it. I was like, oh no. I was so fucking sad, dude. I got the pull net. This is in front of them. This thing's so dead. I got the pull net, scooped it out and then pressed on its chest. I tried to resuscitate my boy. He was very dead. How many, how many do they have? Like three? Two or three made it. But one of the fellas hit the pool. My neighbor had a nest of barn swallows. So the mayor just, I, the body, I was, I couldn't look at it. I had to go inside for a second and pretend I wasn't incredibly upset because that is weird. And then I come back and the mayor just threw in the trash can in the kitchen. Kitchen? He just put a dead bird in the house and then went back to game. I was like, we should have buried the man. The mayor grew up on like a bayou or something. Why the fuck would he throw a dead bird inside the trash? Who knows? I mean, at least over the fence, man. That's the tragedy of the, the run. Oh, dude, that's, it's my neighbor. A similar journey, dude. Well, hey, they moved on. You're gonna sit in empty nest. You're an empty bud lighter right now. I still, I still think about him now. I'm just stuck with these nasty fucking cardinals. That's all I have. They're, you have some cool cardinals though. I've seen, you got some. They just gave birth. Did they just hatch? I don't know how to use the words. Yeah, they gave birth. Yeah, they gave birth. They, and then hatched. Yeah. They, they're, they have their hatchlings. My neighbor had a similar, a similar thing where he had barn swallows. If you have a nest of barn swallows, it's actually illegal in Austin to like remove the nest. I guess it's like endangered. So he had these like barn swallows nesting. No one's going to find out. I mean, that's true. You can smash that fucking nest. That's true. That's true. It was like killing a praying mantis is illegal. I guess if you like, if you told your neighbor, if I, if I, he was like, I got barn swallows. I saw him swatting it. I could be like, which I would. Yeah. This is against law. I would have called it. I would have called the cops. I'm like, sorry, dude. I like he was a neighbor, but I would absolutely punish you under the law. But no, he was like laughing because he was like, dude, they're like right there. Like, and they like that they're protective. So they'll swoop on you if you're close to them. So they were like, kind of like, yeah, we're kind of giving our whole porch to these birds. And he's like, it's nice. He got like real attached to them. They're shitting all over his porch. And then the one day he just saw one dead bird and he goes, I got three more. Every bird died. And he used to the same thing. He was like, I went with like a, on a journey with his bird family. All their babies died. And then he's like, I don't even want to take the nest away. I'm like, what if they want to come back and have more eggs? I'm leaving that nest. I might just keep living in this house for one more year. Just to keep an eye on it. Just to go, please come back, bros. Tell you what, if you want some buddies right now, my gardens popping with lizards, it's been, they're nice. They're low maintenance. Did you get one of those rock things? No, I didn't even get a right. Well, my, my whole garden beds made of limestone rock. So they kind of chill on that. But there, I think they're eating my strawberries. Could be wrong, but I don't even mind, dude. I call it. Make sure you're right when you accuse someone of this. I hear you, but I've seen guys go down the wrong path. My buddy executed a possum. Steve Mc. Name to me. He fucking stabbed the possum. You can't possibly, I had a possum in my yard. I liked him. Possums are good. He's dead. They drowned it and then it wouldn't drown. So he stuck a fucking spike through its chest. Aim, right? It's fucking crazy. He showed me. I was like, bro, I don't like you. That's all right. Yeah. Possums also eat snakes and shit. They're good to have. They're good to have. After he did it, he was telling me about it. And I was like, bro, I'm pretty sure they're good for gardens. They are. There's no way he was grabbing your tomatoes. And yeah. I looked it up today. They will. I don't know if it's them per se, is that we have those fake owls and I don't see a lot of birds in my garden. So I don't think it's the birds munching them. But I swear, I think these, but it's, I don't even care. Did I call them having sex the other day? I have lizards having sex on video. It's pretty tight. That is tight. My dog tried to eat them while they're having sex, which would be. Oh, the ultimate three. Getting devoured mid sex. Pure or a bore. It was pretty nice. It's almost as good as honestly, the rent did have a good life. Yeah. Dance with his parents. Splish, splash, splash a little. Yep. Hit the pool. It's a good life. Hey, man, some birds fly. He swam. Off limits. Don't joke about that. I mean, I know roasting is therapeutic, bro. Look, as a roast master myself. We only roast the rents we love. That is, it is a sick life for a bird though. You got to go, you know, jumped around with his mom and dad. Yep. And then Lamarley threw him in a fucking trash can underneath like calm tissues. Oh, God, buried like a pharaoh surrounded by calm. How could you do that? Why are you bro? I know what to do. I just thought I put it in the bag and put it in the trash. Oh, you bagged it. I bagged it. That's nice. Yeah. I don't want to leave it in the trash for all, you know. Trash, we're all gonna, it's gonna, they stink. That would have stunk so bad. Although if you time it right, I guess you could toss it. I would, I should have been, I would have gone right. He wouldn't have smelled. Yeah, it was fresh. He was fresh. My smell. Yeah, they stink. Tiny mouse. That bird would have got the stinking. Poor guy. All right, Peter, the bird. But the other two. The mayor was there for me pretending not to be really upset. How'd you feel about the bird? So sad, dude. I was kind of sad. Everyone was pretty bummed out. Yeah, man. See a floating baby bird in the pool. It was kind of bummed. Especially because I like as soon as I got back from the airport, I was like, John, check this out. My guys hatched. They're out. They're jumping around. No. The parents, the parents are like, no, don't. I must jump in with my clothes on. I'm not even like a jump in like one of those where you run. Why? This episode is brought to you by Prize Picks. The regular season is done and the NBA playoffs are here. Time to get in on the action with the prize picks, a preferred partner of the NBA NBA and a space B space A. Download the price picks app today and use code drench to get $50 in lineups after you play your first five dollar lineup and during the playoff during the playoffs, make a five dollar lineup with a live NBA pick for a shot at the do it live sweepstakes trip to the NBA finals. That's a rough one. Made on bullshit sense. More info can be found on the prize picks promos board. Prize picks, a preferred partner of the NBA. Yeah, that's that's that's really sad. I'm I didn't know that happened. Yeah, I'm sorry to the I know a lot of the listeners were excited to find out. Yeah. But anyway, back to the roast. True. I don't like the way people talk about roasts when they're like roasting is just like this is just what we do. What we do? Um, it's yeah, it was yeah, that's that was the best part of the culture, bro snapping. I did have to snap, dude. Snap both my guns loaded full clips. Ready to dunk on Cheryl under was the husband for some reason. So she really did. Yeah, I did call her. I saw there was an article about it because I felt like I was like, this is a serious thing to make fun of somebody for sure. And I don't know her well enough to be like make. So I called her and you you saw her on the road. She's wild. She was she was a delight to talk to on the phone. Yeah, I bet. And then how did you even breach the subject? Like, hey, how you doing? Oh, yeah, it's pretty nice out. Yeah. Hey, quick thing. Oh, no, she immediately. She read it. I was like, hey, Cheryl, I got to ask you about this. You're making fun of my husband for jumping off the building. It's like, that's it. That's it. And look, I'm thinking about that. I have no problem not doing it. It's probably going to make me look bad. So I'm definitely OK with not doing it. Yeah. So the next day I go into a meeting and I'm like, I don't think I should do that joke. Left the meeting with four more jokes about it. I was like, it's my entire set now. And what in the meeting was the meeting like execs and shit? There were two Netflix people in there, but I think they were just writing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, what we were talking about. OK, so there's more. But yeah, that and the bonsai tree joke could have done without it. Yeah, turns out you never know, though. Turns out could have done without it. Yeah. Sometimes you know, I mean, I was right. Running it in front of the wrong crowds. Yeah, I was just doing it in Austin and then Boston. And they were like, fuck yeah, dude. No, I did it in Nashville, Charlotte, Austin and Boston. All four cities were like, you got to do it. It's unanimous. I did do it. I ran it at Chappelle's. Yeah. That it was it was me. It was it was a cool room. Yeah. There was exactly who would be upset by it. And they liked it. I that's the other thing, too. It's like, I think people still laugh and thought if you if you were to try to take like a general, if you sit outside of a gas station today and caught the afternoon rush, what'd you think about that? They'd be like, probably, you don't give a fuck, bro. I was hilarious, dude. Yeah. I already I feel that I was I was on a construction site yesterday. They're like, bro, they don't give a fuck. That was great, man. So yeah, the boys are fired up. Yeah, I will say this. I just think I think the tallies in on that specific roast. I think the white boys went dumb. It's true. White boys went dumb. The white boys went dumb. White boys. The white boys might have went too dumb. I don't know what to say. They're the white boys. White boys might be the king of snapping now. Hey, look, I'm just going off what I saw. You think the white boys are the king of snapping? I think so. I think so. I think the white boys are the king of snapping. I just know that's getting a fucking headline. Matt McCusker says the white boys are the kings of snapping. Let me tell you something that McCusker. You'll never be the king of snapping. I'm not the king of snapping. I mean, but I can snap. You can snap. I can snap. But I don't know if someone snaps me, I'll get real sad. I don't like I was watching that being like, dude, I would fucking spaz. That's what you think. And then it is. I mean, I didn't really get anything too bad. Yeah, true. But. It's funny. Yeah. When someone makes funny like that, it is. It is funny. But I everyone's like, it was genuinely funny getting made fun of. That's true. I thought that I was really afraid I was going to be like. Well, here's the problem, here's the problem, though. You did well. If I did poorly and then someone made fun of like my kids, I'd have been like, yo, seriously, dude, something's. Seriously, dude, knocking off. You know what else? I didn't even try to fight your mate. What's the heavy a guy? Yeah, I'm like, seriously, Mr. Green, that's enough. All right. There's limits. But if I did it good, I'd be like, I didn't even consider how bad it was to go first. Yeah. And then I remembered, like I saw like at the roast of at Voss's roast, everyone just made fun of Florentine for his ex killing herself. Yeah. Like before he went. And then when he went, everyone was like, the whole crowd was like, come on, Jim. Yeah. So like. That was his wife. Yes. God damn. Yeah, he got it pretty good. Also, nicest dude ever. And then the man, but then he got on and just murdered. So that's cool. But what I was saying is like going first, you look like you're just a psycho. Everyone's like, why is he fucking like, who's this guy saying mean things for no reason? Well, that's at least you have the first dibs on stuff in case there's like things bleed together. But I get it, dude, opening a crowd and being obviously you're like, you're not even thinking like, OK, I got to like, I got to lead these guys into the waters. You're just coming out and it's like, bam. Yeah, I should have. I should have been a little more articulate up front of being like, this is a roast. I mean, we're going to say some terrible things. They also know everyone knows what happens. They sure didn't. The live, the live audience. That front section did not agree with anything I was saying. Well, that's also that's, you know, that's the elites, dude. They're they're like they can get charged. Well, they can get charged with like face crime. So they're probably just they're probably just like deadpan. Just kind of like, that's actually very funny because they can't be up there. If you're like the CEO of like Nesquik, you can't be like, you have to just be like, like everything else in your nothing. I don't like anything. There's there's five million shareholders, depending on you to just be like that does suck, though. If I was up there, there's just a bunch of like very elegantly dressed people being like, fine, I quit. I'm done. Also, Kevin is he's like a pro at this shit. So he was like, he's helping you. Yeah, he wants the show to go well. So if you say something terrible, he's going to be like, you're crazy. He's not he's not going to be like, what the fuck? I thought he was great with that, though, because the whole time you watch him. I mean, yeah, I also love when he did, when he would stand up and just kind of prance around him, like there's literally nothing better. Yeah, it's nice. If you have a black dude stands up out of his chair and laughs, you're just like, it's better than spit take. I was just being like, yes. And then Cheryl Cheryl was so fucking funny. Yeah, that was she did a completely different thing in the rehearsal. We did a rehearsal like a couple of hours before the show. And she just made up what she was going to talk about then, too. She made up the whole thing. It was great. That's insane. Yeah, you might be Queen of Snap in there. She's the queen. She's the queen. I really think so. Go and just go and ad lib on that on TV is really kind of insane. But I will say what I'm sitting up there and they're like, if you say the N word will all beat your ass. I was like, I'm not going to say it. Yeah, what the hell is this joke? I wasn't going to say it. That might have been a preloaded. No, because it was off of me saying Wigga Dracula. Oh, yeah. Got you. Got you. But then I watched, you know, Earthquake stand up like, yeah. No, Earthquake. Don't beat my ass. Earthquake, Earthquake ruled in the front. There was certain people that I could count on. Earthquake, Jay Farrell. Those are my guys, dude. Yeah, that is pretty nice, actually. It was nice to see who was like, go for it. All you need are a couple of guys. If you have a couple of guys, especially Quake, if you got Quake on your side, it was the same at the Espeys. I needed John Jones and Druski and Lamar Jackson. Lamar Jackson got me through a couple of look downs. All of Marjax and laughing. I was like, that's so sick. Was it even close to as tight as the Espeys? No, it was it was a lot better than that. Yeah, they were tight. But I wasn't being. Making racist jokes, really. Yeah, at the Espeys. Yeah. That's where you feel bad. Make a racist joke. You look out and you see an older black lady going. You go, I'm so sorry. I don't believe in what I'm saying. I swear I'm joking. I know I look like I'm serious. I'm keeping a straight face. Overall, it was oh, another Lizzo. What a fucking treat. You were saying she was awesome. I know. I know. Absolute angel. Down to a lot in hindsight. I guess she never really did anything that I shouldn't. It's just it's the media, dude. It's like the media. The media is I nasty. Comment tours are I nasty. Podcasts can be I nasty at the weaker moments. It's weird and I nasty ecosystem. Yeah, it's complete. Dude, every I like read the news now. And it's like every everything I read is like America's over. We're fucked. No one will ever get a job ever again. Fuck. And it's just like, dude, why? Why are you guys doing this to everybody? Don't do that. That's not nice. And this guy's a fucking idiot. You're like, all right, that's cool. I'm in the debate sphere right now. My algorithm is just debates, dude. They're I they're the funniest fucking things. Yeah. It's like, well, no, that's just a logical fallacy. And then it'll be like, yeah, you're fucking retired. Like, what did you call me? It's like, oh, I'm just saying it's fucking crazy. It's it's unbelievable. Yeah, I saw one. I was just taking a shit. And I saw a nice one. Did you really? It was a fucking forget his name. Who's the guy that did vice and then the Proud Boys? Oh, Gavin Giz. Yeah, he was doing something on Pierce Morgan. And some lady was like, they were like, what's citizenship are you? He was like, Canada, United States and England. OK. And they're like, she was like, you can't have three. You can only be dual citizenship. And he was like, yeah, I can. You fucking stupid bitch. They were like, what'd you say? He was like, I called her a stupid fucking bitch. Just made debates. Baz, whatever you fucking idiot. It's nothing but I watch him. Everyone you eventually do it. And it's funny too. When someone gets you in a debate, you go, OK, look, I see what you're saying. But then you just jump to another. It's so fucking funny. We're just going to have to agree to disagree on this. Let's table that for now. You're being kind of pedantic. Let's table that for now. What I'm really talking about, it's, dude, it's really nonsense. I was reading a book. It was too dense. I had to read a book about the book to try to understand it. But they were basically saying that in modern times, morality has been so kind of like jettison from what it originally kind of was formed around, which was like divine law, basically, from like religion. So now when people have moral arguments, they're not really rooted in anything other than people's personal preferences. And that all people do is just yell at each other because they're like, I like this. And they're like, well, you're a fucking retard. I like this. And that's all the debate is anymore, according to Alistair McIntyre. I agree with Alistair McIntyre. Alistair McIntyre is the man. I hope so. I don't know. Dude, I catch. I'm done saying people are cool too. He's cool. I'm not saying people are good or bad anymore. Well, you know what's funny? He was like a philosopher in the 80s who came up with this book about kind of morality and whatever. And so I was like trying to learn more about it. It's really hard. All those books are so fucking hard to read. So they expect that you just like know all of Creek, they'll be like, obviously, Persephone. And you're like, who the fuck is that? You gotta read about that. But there was a lady, a professor, I believe, was covering the book. And then in the introduction, she was like, yeah. And he says a lot about like community and practice. He's had four different wives, which that's kind of weird. I'm like, why are you being nasty? You're supposed to be a fucking academic. Now you're being I nasty to Alistair McIntyre. He's dead. The guy's fucking died like two years ago. Yeah, he just toss in there. Four wives. He's like, four fucking wives. What the hell is he talking about? What does he know about community? He's a fucking asshole. And you're like, what the fuck? You're a PhD. No one's immune, dude. No one is immune. It's just it's it is it's the path for people now. It is the absolute path. And it's, you know, just it's what the people want right now. They want to get nasty. You know, I would love to get a device hooked to my phone. I mean, I guess you could just monitor your Apple Watch because I'm pretty sure my vitals go up by like 10 Harpies a minute. I was on the other day just just on the internet. Yeah, dude. And I just got like then I sat down. I was like, I didn't feel like this before I went to my phone. It's bad. It's the devil. It is the devil. I've been doing all right staying off it this week. Yeah, doing my best. But then you stay off it and someone goes, you know, I sent you a bunch of shit. You didn't see it. You're like, I was off. And they're like, that's OK. I can handle that. Yeah, true. It's more someone gives you bad news. Yeah. You see what they're saying about you. No, I'm trying to avoid it. Yeah, don't. That's dude, when people hit you up, you like, you see, they're calling you gay on Reddit. I'm like, don't don't call me. Don't tell me that. Cousins do that to me. Like, you know, they're calling you gay and say you suck at basketball and red. I'm like, I don't even know what the fuck you talking about. I don't suck at basketball. I'm pretty good. I'm getting better. What the fuck? Yeah, man, I've been I've been hooping lately. That's been my that's been my dreams. I do have hoop dreams now. Absolute hoop dreams. It's been I've learned I have to I do have to tone it down on the court. I'm telling you, I need I I I came up playing different, bro. True. I might have to go. I might have to go to the hood to play ball. The gentlemen, they don't like it. Dude, you talk a little tiny bit of shit. I feel like you can test a foul call. I thought that was totally acceptable. But foul at the fuck. People like what? Every single person does that. Everybody never played a single game where someone's like, oh, you're going to call that. Yeah, I know. Yeah, you slapped you hit me in the face. I'll if I actually get you, I'll call it on myself. But sometimes there's calls where I'm like, lose ballcalls and fucking pick up. Come on, bro. That's crazy. Dude. But yeah, I've I've I've squashed. I squashed on my court. There's nothing worse than before a court beef. I squashed them immediately because I can be a little bastard here to be like, oh, you're not going to call that one. Huh? They're like, what the fuck is your problem? And I'm trying to play. I'm like, yeah, my bad. My bad. Yeah, you've reached an age where you can't do that. I can't help it, bro. I know, but the fiery old head. If I played, I'd be doing the exact same thing. That's how you play. Yeah. That you fuck around. Dude, I hate you. You build the rivalry. You go, I actually dislike the other team. My guys are my brothers. I'll die for them. I don't know any of their names. Yeah. Yeah, man. And then throw it to the wrong team. Fuck. It was on my team. You see, have you guys ever seen Jordan's game winner against UNC or when he was at UNC, he won the national championship. It's like an iconic. Oh, yeah. Maybe it was it was like a defining moment. He hits a corner jumper to win the national title. There was 20 seconds left. The other team gets the ball and comes down the court with 20 seconds. The guy at the top of the key just throws the ball to North Carolina. He throws it to the wrong guy. No, it just everyone just sucked. It's like a street ball fucking pass, like a little kid. Pat, the guy gets the ball. No one's really pressuring him. He just panics and throws it to another guy. That's the game. There's 20 seconds. I thought I hit a buzzer beater. That's crazy. I didn't know that either. Yeah. What? Give it a look. It's a comical. Probably had actually probably had it comically bad pass. Yeah, that's insane. I didn't know that. Yeah. I guess they don't make it not as exciting when they show that at the end. Guy hits the spaz for with the title on the line. That's one thing I think is unnecessary and pick up basketball. You can find the players who like they get the ball spaz. I'm like, yeah, they'll fucking literally toss the ball. The fucking throne here. That is I'll just be like, yeah, and I watch the guy like threw the ball and I was like, that was a dirty play. Yeah, you're a dickhead. Or when someone shoots and you go you blow your head at them, they fuck something. You can't be doing this shit. I was hitting him with fucking I was hitting him with driveway, McCusker, because it would have been clapping while they're shooting in their face like that. Playing fucking defense with a hand in their face. Do that. Do all that. You're fucking dickhead. That's crazy. I'm toning it down. I'm learning. I'm learning how to play. Because I really just want to run around. That's my thing. I'm like, if I get to run around, you know, if I lose, I'm like, whatever, good game. But I thought the thing is you talk shit and then you get to like you get the back and forth and you call an ISO and you get to go one on one against you. It's just fun. But now, bro, call an ISO is also crazy. You don't call it, but you get it. You set picks to get a match up and go, oh, here we go. I got this dumb pussy who wanted to just work out today. It was like, I'll try basketball. I go by myself now as I'm trying to get used to the rims. So I'll run back and forth full court and just practice my fast breaks, my pull ups. It's so nice. Fuck it, I'm not. I'm trying to get, I'm trying to get, it's double rim. It's hard as hell. Of course. I'm trying to get, if I can get my, I'm trying to get like my like seven to eight footer down. My fade away, step back. I run drills by myself. I know I feel so bad for the guys in your neighborhood that have to deal with this fucking every time you show up. They must be like, see, get out of your car with your fucking wrap around. Oakley's on. I'm getting that sense, honestly. Just got to be like, oh, fuck, he's here again. And then I'll score like four points. Four points, 15 fouls, 10 rebounds. You are Dreymond. Dude, they were, I was when they were booing him, I'm like, you don't deserve that, dude. Now, Dreymond's, Dreymond's the fucking man. Yeah, dude, he plays hard. I don't he was nervous. Yeah. I mean, imagine that. Yeah. Imagine just out of nowhere. And me and Pete were talking. I was I like walked over to them right before we started. I was like, so fucking nervous. Oh, shit. And Dreymond was like, Oh, thank God, you said that, dude. I'm so fucking nervous. And Pete was like, dude, I'm gonna fucking die. That must be such a relief when you get done. You're set. And all you got to do is just kind of sit there and be like, Oh, you'd like this at the beginning, at the very beginning, the way they introduced me is a black thought from the roots is like, you guys ready for the roast? Now the roundest thing on tires, Shane Gill, and I didn't know that. And I was walking out like, the fuck black thought. Didn't know that wasn't him. I know. Yeah. There was someone who was beefing with you. It was it was not black thought. No, I thought your enemy finally spiked. No, no, no. Me. Me and my I know that. Who are you talking about? We're good. That's guys. That's nice. And black thought used to do shows at punchline Philly. Did he really? Yeah. I've known him for forever. That's awesome. When I was in Philly, I would do a show. Yeah, that's awesome. Hey, got you. He rose. I was excited to see him. That's nice. He got a little roast. That's the that's the move. You get one roast introduced out. Yeah. It's kind of nice. Yeah. It's just walking on stage. And someone's like, look at this fucking fat piece of shit. It wasn't. All right. Hey, everybody, welcome to Los Angeles. Coolest guy alive. Just called me fat in front of millions of people. How's everyone doing? Oh, Tom Brady just called me a fat piece of shit. All right. What else is on the docket? Oh, the rock came out and called me a bitch. OK. Cool. I will say, dude. Huh? Who's tequila? Who's tequila is better? The rocks or Kevin Hart's? Yeah. No, that's a good question. Lemme's I don't know. I don't know which one I had. Yeah, I don't. I've never had Kevin Hart's. I've had Tiramana. I've had the rocks. I'm a big tequila guy, but I don't know. You know who's is nice? I'll be honest. McBrides. Oh, really? I was shocked. I mean, it's like, you know, you just never think when people are like, Oh, it's a guy is a tequila. I tried. I said, God, man, I can't really taste different. I can tell I can tell unless it's like bad bad. You can go, oh, this is the worst. Yeah. You could go. Worst drink I've ever had in my life. What? Just bad tequila? Yeah, it's horrible. Yeah. When I hate you with the additives, you go, there's a certain flavor you go. That's a weird one. But it's, you know, there's a lot of them. It's all good at the end of the day. But lemon in it and shit, a lot of them are pretty good. But I was shocked. Do you ever see his website? He does like skits on his tequila website where he's like, people are getting their legs chopped off while they're feeling the agave. Who? McBride. Yeah, I saw the one with him and Stevie Jenner. Yeah, he cuts his leg off. That's great. Yeah. I just got it in the mail. I was like, Chris, what the fuck is this? It was good. What's it called? I think I have it. Gato or something. Yeah, that's right. I think it's Gato. Yeah, I'm big on the celebrity. I'll try all of them. I don't know why. I just like that. I like to try them out. Then I don't really drink. So I need to get a celebrity moonshine. Celebrity moonshine. 350 proof. Just kill everyone. It's heavy. Can please get it made like like like chemically made in China. You get like the fit and all of alcohol. Just get fed and sell it. Dudes are drinking it. They're getting abscesses in the arm. I keep looking for my friends. Last time I was sitting here, they were there. He was still alive, dude. That birds that birds hopping around spirit right now as you jump around the house. Poor little guy. I don't think the other guys are going to make it. I saw him. We're just in the backyard now. They're popping around. Yeah, he's just jumping into the neighbor's fucking window. You got turf too, don't you? In my idea, but they're probably hitting the other side of the fence. Oh, that's good. How the hell they get over there? They flying? Yeah, they can fly. They flew right away. Oh, they're good. Yeah. If they if they flew, I think they're I mean, they're both probably going to die really quick. I think the survival rate for birds. But it's I was thinking about them pecking the turf for worms and just slowly dying of hunger. Matt. Just going, what is this? I have feed out there. I put a bunch of bird feed. Oh, yeah. I threw in the yard. I threw a bird feed. Now my pool is covered in bird shit. I forgot. You had them ready. You had them set up. Also, cardinals are dickheads. Are they mean? They control the fucking birdhouse. Have you ever been in a footage over there? Yeah, it's just a fucking squirrel that eats everything in the tube and a family of cardinals. That's all I got. Then occasionally me or the mayor walking out towards it looking at it. I'm standing. The mayor grab in like a 10-year-old sunflower seat. The mayor will get in there. I'll catch a mayor for in the morning night vision. Squirrel comes up. July 17th, I'll be at the link in Philadelphia. We just released some new tickets. So please, please purchase them. Please come. It's going to be a hoot. There's going to be a lot of people there. I will be in Chicago this very Saturday. I'll be in Toronto as well. And then Chicago this Saturday, May 16th, 7 p.m. at the Riviera Theater in Chicago, Illinois. There's a few tickets left. You know what's left? Single seats. Bunch of single seats dotting in. That's fun. Going to a show by yourself is a nice treat. Yeah. Come by yourself. But you can sit next to someone's girlfriend. Probably touch the thigh with your leg. You can do it the whole show. You can do it the whole show. I'm like, hey, I'm fucking crammed in here. I just got a jerk. But yeah, so come to that. That'll be very fun. Yes. Hey, guys, it's me, Sean. I'll be in Cincinnati next week. Please come if you can. SeanGardini.com and OptimaMnachtis is next week as well. So please come. What's the date on OptimaMnachtis? May 19th. Please come to OptimaMnachtis on May 19th. Tickets are available at SeanGardini.com. And then I'll be in Charleston and Raleigh too. A great story like Monsters, Inc. stays with you forever. And Disney Plus is where you'll find your next great story from the return of the award-winning hit series, Rivals. Welcome to the naughtiest show on television. To the unmissable crime drama, High Potential. Gotta dead body. Gotta go. A lifetime of great stories awaits. This spring on Disney Plus, 18 Plus, subscription required. T's and C's apply. Thank you. Nice. Thank you guys. But yeah, I'm on the side socks that your baby birds died. But what just won? Just won. If the other two flew, that's good news. They made it over that fence. That fence is like, that's the ultimate test for a baby bird. That's a big ass fucking fence. So did you see him learn how to fly or did they start from the ground and like? He was hopping, but he was flying pretty quick. That's tight. Yeah. That's tight. It was just great to see mom and dad jumping around. Mom and dad trying to block like, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah. Jill. Ah, they were hopping around. They looked happy. Yeah. They were hopping. Yeah. Oh, they don't know. They didn't know what was going on. Oh, fuck. Mom's probably pregnant again right now. I hope. Get back in here. That would be so tight. Yeah, I wonder how I wonder how often do Rens like churn them out? Is it like per season? Because I know rabbits. I think it's season. It's a season. Yeah. Because rabbits will kick out like four litters. They fucking, they rock them, man. They're nice. I think coyotes are year round, too. Really? I think they're like nonstop. That'd be nice. What is it? Two broods per season. Oh, we got another brood. You have another brood. Yeah, it goes till August. Oh, typically the season. Bro, if they get back in, they'll be fucking pumped. She's probably out there shaking ass right now. Don't talk about her like that. Dude, they're a couple. They're together. She's probably shaking her tail feathers right now. They're together. That's good. If they're together forever, that's nice. Yeah. Look at the pair bonding data on Rens, please. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's see if they stay together. I was watching a thing yesterday saying that human pair bonding is all fucked up because we can't smell each other. He's like, you're supposed to like smell ladies BO and see like if you're nervous, if your immune systems are like compatible. There's another fuck all that. You don't want to see, you don't smell like immune. No, I don't care about that. I don't like whoever, whatever weird freak came up with that. He was like, our pair bonding is fucked up. It's like I'm tired of everyone being like, you know, we're not designed to actually be doing this. This is shut up. Shut the fuck up. I feel like I'm designed to be playing Xbox. I'm obviously designed for it. They have very strong pair bonding, according to us. They're together forever. God, love wins the end of the day. Love wins again, dude. Amiss the I nasty. Love wins. Amiss all the I nasty people. I'm going to get DMs. I'm glad that fuck that. Fuck that round. That's bullshit, dude. What? Oh, no. What is it, guys? Nate found out some bad news. Says, most birds do not reuse the same nest for future seasons. It's all right. There's another box right next to it. Yeah, true. And also, and they had a good, that's a good one, dude. I'm pretty sure you talk about shittiness. They're coming back. Yeah, I like to believe they're coming back. That's the penthouse. Although you can, I'm sure you can also recreate. What the fuck you guys doing to me, dude? What the fuck you guys doing over there? Wouldn't be hard to recreate that. I told my mom about the Cardinals. What'd she say? Well, she thinks Cardinals represent my dead grandmother. Oh, so she's like, oh, that's my mom. I was like, yeah, it's my mom. For some reason, it made me upset. I was like, mom, that's so fucking dumb. But I'd love to make fun of her. I saw Cardinal and I was like, mama. It's in there. If I heard one person say that, I'd like, yeah, I know. Exactly what you're saying. Yeah, it's definitely my mom. That's really sweet. And it's funny. And then you see, you're just bullying birds. Yeah, I see. That means my mom's watching. I hope not. Yeah, true. I hope my mom's not peeking through the glass in here. Just tapping the glass. Naked for a day. Didn't go outside yesterday. I have neighbors behind me now, like right up against the back. And now I'm trying to be more mindful, shutting my shutters. I'll get naked or in the night. I'm naked. And I just forget. Lights on naked? Oh, yeah, dude. You're really cool. I just forget. Because we had nothing back there. Now there's just, and it's just like, boom, right up against us. Some poor kid. I hope not. You're growing up with a freak bull neighbor. We just forget. Once everyone's asleep, I'm fucking, I'm hitting it. I'm in the birthday suit. I'm in the birthday suit. Shaking tennis for my wife. I'm like a male rendist fucking hopping around. That's what you think of this. I'm due, brother. I'm due. I've been, man, I've been suffering. Really? Suffering, yeah. I've been suffering so hard. How bad? Bad, bro. I'm waiting. I'm due. I'm due. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't sleep the other night. I get to the point where I can't fucking sleep. Out of horniness. It's just, if I go a week, if I'm on a week retention, the seventh, eighth day, I'm going to lay in bed and just like, my cells are just kind of like, I can't sleep. It'll just take me significantly longer to fall asleep. And I'm going like this. You're just how cold. You have no idea. I'm over here suffering, dude. And you're just sleeping fitfully. You got to take matters in your own hands at that point. Yeah. But then, but then, well, I will at a certain point. But then you go, this is what I get. I just have to masturbate for the rest of my life. Because I'm off the knock, too. I, again, I'm not making a big thing about it. I just, I'm like, I'm like, I don't want it. I don't want it in my life. And then I go, hey, I'm trying not to. Why do you even need to watch that? And I go, this is naked tits. This is cool. It's awesome. There's naked tits. And I saw them when I was like nine and it's just, you're not. It's just, I'm always going to watch that if you don't touch my penis. You even watch that? I've got to feel that bunch of times. Why would you even have to watch that? I go, what do you mean? Why? I mean, I don't have to, but like, you know, why does an engine speeds up the process? Yeah. Why does an engine need grease? You know what I mean? Like, come on. We're going to lose the wheels a little. Exactly. I mean, bro, there can only be so much. You want me to jack off for three hours or do you want it to be five fucking minutes? You tell me. You got to do. You got to relieve the tension in the bow. Otherwise it breaks. Of course. You got a long bow. You got a British long bow. I got the crossbow, dude. I got a stubby. I got a stubby Irish hunting bow. I'm losing weight. I'm excited to get like 0.001 inches length back. Yes. Nice. I'm trying to get down to like 180. Did four miles a day. That's sick. And the texture is on. It blows. I went for a walk yesterday. It was fucking miserable. Yeah. I should have put it on sunscreen. I forgot. What time did you go? One or two. That's dude. That's fucking terrible. Absolute heat of the day. Yeah. If you catch like an 8 AM when the sun's just kind of just getting settled, it's so nice. I'm not catching that. Catch it. Catch it. Now with this schedule. Yeah, true. I'm dying, brother. Yeah, you must be tired. I'm tired. Must be tired. Dude, I had to. We did a show in LA on Wednesday night. After the show, we had to fly to Boston to do the Boston show. I left LA at like 11 AM or 11 PM. Cross country flight, lose three hours. I got in at like 7 30 AM. Went to sleep. I slept from like eight to two, maybe. Oh, dude. Then had to wake up and go do the fucking Boston garden. But and thrice as well, right? And then Friday, Saturday. But that was that was awesome. Boston's like, yeah, that's literally the best. But that does suck. And then after the show, Saturday, get on plane and fly back to do the roast that day. And the roast on the West Coast that we had to start. I just I had to get there at like 9 AM. Yeah. So you did a night flight back, basically. Yeah. You must be tired. I'm a little tired from that. Yeah. I mean, that's like that's. I did nothing yesterday. I'm fine. That is the stuff of one day. Yeah. Coast to coast is tough. Coast to coast is really close to coast. And coast to coast to coast. Really, California to Boston and a show that day. That sucked. Yeah. Yeah. That's yeah. That's fucking. It is funny going from like LA and then just hitting like the pale list. I was so happy to be home. So happy to be back on the East Coast. The Northeast just with ugly pale guys. Those are my brothers. Yeah. It's nice actually. Fucking dogs finally. Boston does rule. Boston is maybe the best city. Yeah. It's up there. It's really nice. Anytime you put out a bunch of shows, Boston always is like sells out so fast. So weird. It's like they're literally just are the bros. This is my last arena. Really? Yeah. For what? For that arena tour. For that tour, yeah. Yeah. The only thing I have left is the link, dude. It's time to focus on the link. Oh man. Told you what happened to me. I got a fucking high. I got a high off a gun. Thought about it. Thought about it. I have full body panic attack. I was like, that's so many fucking people. And I just threw a full body just like, fuck. Yes. Doesn't even make sense. You're entering my room. Nothing makes sense. You're entering what I've been doing for three straight years every day. Every day you wake up and go, holy shit. Fuck. It doesn't make sense. And then you go, you know what? Fine. I'll check the internet. Fuck him. Fuck. All my thoughts were right. I am a terrible person. It is funny that it's like, it really is. It's like the part of yourself that's like looking out and judging the world just gets like scraped through all of the same part of other people. It's just like, all that's left. Either you become calcified and nasty, or you just let all the nasties go. And you're not even, can't be nasty anymore. Can't be worried about the nasties. Can't be worried. That's why it also makes sense too. Like when I was younger and I'd watch famous actors talk about anything, I'm like, this guy's a freak. And then it's like, oh, this guy, since he's been 12, has been just braided by newspapers. And that's why they get in there and they're like, it's all about the work and about your energy. Yeah, that's what happens after that. Yeah. It says this about them. But that would be the end of our careers. Yeah. If we became a weird freak. Leather bracelets. Yeah. Leather bracelets. I'll get some other bracelets. You need to get them. And be like, it's all about the good internal to the activity. It's Aristotle said that it's about the vibes, obviously. You're like, this guy's a fucking fruit. And you're like, dude, I've just. I would break one day though. In the middle of an interview, you'd be like, yeah, that guy is a fucking fruit. I fucking hate that fucking guy. Oh, fuck. I'm back. No. No. I gotta meet him now. Fuck. You know what? I am allowed to say whatever I want. Hey, if I think it's funny, I'll fucking say it. In the middle of like a kid's cartoon show I'm doing, I'm voicing a dog on a. You know what? Fuck it. True. Yeah, we shall see. I mean, it all. It was the buzz. It was the talk of the town. But some people have to face their eyed nasties. You do. You do. And it's coming. Why are you telling me somebody had to face their eyed nasties? Yeah, people, everyone's facing them. People are dying by the eyed nasties. Because it will rock at you. It'll get rocket fuel. You can be as nasty as you want. It'll rock at you. But also too, you're gathering the nasties. And they're going as soon as anything even decent happens for you, which is best case scenario, the nasties will turn. Yeah. They'll go. Yep. No, please. Please. Yeah. I'm having liquid death sponsorship. It's all working out. When the thing you dreamed of happening happens and all you can think about is fucking. I nasty. The shit I put out in the world seven years ago. No. Don't even remember it. I just pray no one. Yep. Yep. Yep. It happens. But hey, man, again, all we can do is work hard and get leather bracelets. That plant's blocking my balls still, right? All right. Perfect. Keep an eye on that. True. We should get one prod, just eye on the balls the entire time. Yeah. That'd be nice. Thanks. You got your eye on it? I keep my eyes. Just so you know, occasionally I glance at yours as well. I'm glad you found a bigger pair of shorts for once. Oh my god. Normally he's wearing a fucking Speedo. It's disgusting. Oh, he's got the Rottweiler turd just fucking hanging. He's folded over. It really is. It's like a Dalmatian era. Like a fucking little tail of a dog. Yes. The dog just got in some paper towels. Did you do that? Just looks like Gardini's dog tail just completely folded. You should have seen Nate's fucking soft ass dog. I seen it. Came over. We had a couple. Yeah, you saw him. Were you here when he was when he was when he got tough? I saw him get tough at the end of the night. That was nice. The pit breeds get a little they can get like a little sundown or something like nighttime. If they're in like a weird place, they get like kind of like whacked out. I've seen that before. But a dog was being very funny. He wasn't going to do nothing. He's the softest. It's I'm ashamed of how soft he is. Sweet dog. It's funny. I can tell how ashamed Nate was. So I kept being like man. The dog is a zesty dog. The dog was being perfect. It was a great dog. You should want to be gay with Jackson. He would 100% be gay. Oh dude, Jackson will get Jackson is blind. But he'll still be gay. If you can like find a dog's dick, he's all over it. Jackson is blind. If you can locate another dog's dick, it's be like, wow. He was real molestered dog. My dog would just lay there and take it. That's what Jackson used to do. Don't put twink on him. Don't put twink on my dog. He's at least a bear. He's definitely not a bear. He's a twink. He's a pretty small. Jackson's old. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he still has his appetites. He still has his appetites. I can't teach him new tricks. No. That's all right. It's better than no. It's better than an alternative. He could be the worst fucking dog. He's a strong dog. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but I wish he would do a little something. He don't even bark. He doesn't bark. Now, he doesn't bark. That breed doesn't bark. He doesn't bark. Yeah, they don't. What is he? I think he's just full pit. He looks like a little staffy a bit. I just got him from the shelter. Yeah, they just had pit. Well, they don't they don't bark. I have a staffy. Same thing. They they'll go like all he does is one. He hits a yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's going the whole time. It's just kind of weird bark. The mailman comes, he goes, fuck me. His eyes crossed. Oh, oh, dude, we even talk about the who is the guy, the Indian dude who claimed the white boss lady dominated him sexually. Yeah, that just came and went, man. That's dude, I got to give it to that guy. We talked about it on Rogan. Did you? And I it was like the day it came out and they read the quote. I was like, this reads like an Indian guy. I don't think she said that. That is a horny Indian guy. What do you call it? Bazookas? Cannons. Cannons. Cannons. Cannons is sick. But what did he call his own wife? A fish head Asian wife. That's the that's the hardest part about getting caught in this. I know. Why'd you call me a fish head with tiny cannons? Why did you make that up? Like the boss is like a yeah, I know, but he's the one who wrote it. Wrote it. So he wrote like, yeah, what is your fish head Asian wife? Think about this. Or that he wrote it. It was all for sure. I believe it was fake or or does that lady have everyone in the office so racistly domed that they're like, yes, yes, mistress. We will we will defeat the rumor. I got like semide when I read no one's mad about a thick racist dom. That lady was hot. Do you see the tall picture? Would you like this? I think that was that because that picture. No, that picture was real. She I mean, she could have fully bimbified me. You know that guy who got caught with the balloons? If I worked for that lady, I'd had to have the balloons and spandex on. I'm like, I'm your little fucking bimbo. Where did you work? J.P. Morgan. Yeah. Also, what a fucking weird leg up for that lady professionally. You just dodged that bullet and now it's like you're in a little interview with some old guy and he's like, yeah, a fucking guy was saying you're saying, you know, what were you saying to that guy? He's just fucking. I'm going to see the fucking picture over. I don't know. Standing on the desk, racially dominating some poor Indian man. Oh, there it is. Why would they take this picture? Let me see. Let me see. So hot. Yo. They did. That's like LinkedIn Edge. They definitely will do that at LinkedIn. Is that real? I think so. That's a girl. But dude, girl bosses get wild. Like a corporate girl boss. That's like that's her Instagram. That's what you've got to break through the glass ceiling somehow, dude. Get on the glass. Shadow that thing. Dude, I mean, dude, he was claiming force blow jobs. He was claiming it's like, bro, stop it. That's so horny to leave a job. I'm going to sue this place and be like, yeah, also I'm the fucking man. The reason I got fired is because I kept getting my dick sucked by the hot lady at work. You feel bad for him or her? Also, why would he do that, though? Why would he make that up? You try to get the bag. Yeah. You want to get 10 mil from them? Again, kind of similar to big J's joke. It's like, that's not that much. If you're asking JPMorgan for 10 mil. I know. But it's like you want to hit that minimum threshold of like, what will they just settle? But you don't even want this. It's not worth it. You can't. He should have went for like a guy and like the guy was sucking my dick and holding me. That would have. Her last name is Hodge Dini. What? Oh, you're the Hodge Dini. Hodge Dini. Dude, that, yeah, that was like, because it was so unbelievable to beg. Hold on. And also it was like, you just can't catch any sympathy. Be like, my boss would fucking blow me and say really cool stuff to me. It's like, dude, nobody's going to believe that. Like, okay, dude, so you got, you got five. I, okay. One, you were nervous and got a forced blow job still is like, there's a there's no such thing as I forced. Yeah, you can take a step back. You can easily take a, but she was like, I'll fucking in my case, you can take a slight lean back. Yeah, dude. Also the most unbelievable thing for your boss to be like, if you don't let me blow you, I'll fire you. It's like that has never happened ever. Just your chick boss being like, okay, got tossed that chick boss in there. That's what I'm saying. I'm sure there's a couple of fellow bosses that were like, I'm going to suck your dick. Yeah. For sure. 100%. Yeah. That's how the boss at Nickelodeon. Yeah. The CEO of Nickelodeon. You go, I'm gonna blow these kids are fired. Yeah. Tell me there's like girl boss, just like week three of her menstrual cycle being like, I'm going to fucking blow this guy. He doesn't let me fucking ruin. I will not endorse his skills on LinkedIn if he doesn't fucking jam his fucking tongue in my mind. I saw it and I was like, what the fuck is this? And then like instantly it was like, yeah, like I made that up, especially fish head as a slur for an Asian. Yeah. That sounds like a very, it's a colloquialism from India, I believe. Is it really must be? I would have heard it. That sounds like a foreign insult. He says it hasn't crossed the pot. That insult hasn't been here. Although it is an invasive species because I'm taking that one. I've actually, I have heard it before. Oh, really? Yeah. That's like an old old school guy. Yeah. So that's an old, old, old one. That's why I was like, what the hell? Canons. Where is she from? It'd be funny too. If he was like, if he played the audio and it's just his accent, like, you don't have cannons like my wife. Your cannons are small and shameful. Dude, speaking of small cannons, I was listening to Shakira recently because the zoo, zoo, they reminded me what you were about to say. Remind me of, yeah. Really? Dude, what the fuck? You know that too? It's like the best song. It's amazing. Yeah. I didn't know that she said, she said they're not like mountains. They're small and humble. And I was like, humble mountains. Just humble. I was like, damn, I never even thought about that. She has humble breasts, but yeah. But her hips don't like, they're not even fucking right. I never heard to be like, yeah, you know how those big fat mountainous titties, mine are small and just humble. Yeah. Like, fuck that's, because that was probably originally written in Spanish. And then they like, you know, just cross it over to English and you're like, is that a fucking thing? Humble. This chick with their fucking narcissistic, big fat narcissistic titties. You're like, bitch. How come we can't do that? That's good. Dude, the fact that I didn't get lucky that my dick is small and humble. Not standing like a mountain. Yeah. That's a, because I was like, I'm Zootopia. Zootopia soundtracks. It's all Shakira. She kind of, she does kind of killed on those soundtracks. She doesn't get enough credit, but I was introducing Maya. I'm like, yeah, she has like a lot of other songs and like I was listening to it. I heard the boobs, the humble mountain tits and I was like, what the fuck? And I now doing that song, I just go, mm, yeah, you got to cover up your, the line about humble, humble small babies. Yeah. You're only a kid's taking that to school. No. No. Cause they remember every little thing. And you're just like, yeah, all right. Don't, don't, don't do that. I just rewatched little kids singing to a little Nas X. It's like my favorite. It's the best. It's one of the best videos ever. He does a school assembly. Oh yeah. He sings old town road, just watching the kids hit every lyric. And then there's a part about like boobies. They hit that one hard. Oh, it's so funny. That's so funny. It little, would you say little Nas X started the like rap R&B country crossover? I don't know. Maybe I feel like he really, I feel like he kicked it off. Flo George. Well, I was at Nellie. They did a song with Nellie. When was that a long time ago? Oh, I remember that actually. Yeah. So that was okay. So that was back in the day. But then I feel it. Yeah. Billy Ray Cyrus. Yeah. But he did old town road too. He did Billy Ray's all over it. Yeah. That's pretty rock. Was it early innovator? He was. He had that song with Cheryl Crow that actually certified picture. Yeah. So it's awesome. That's one song you catch on the radio. It's like that. Goo Goo Dolls or whatever you're like. Goo Goo Dolls does rule. Did you see the Spirit Airlines? Speaking of the Goo Goo Dolls song when they do like remember the whole things like what was I like in the 90s and they put that Goo Goo Doll song. It was what was Spirit Airlines like in the 90s and 2000s. And it dude, it's just, do you see the thing of a guy taking the luggage and throwing it off? There's like the conveyor belt and he just fucking throws it. He's like 20 feet up. He just goes, it's just people fighting, people throwing luggage. It's it's pretty funny. The Goo Goo Doll song gives me anxiety because I did one of the lamest things I've ever done. What? It was. I remember when that song came out, if it came on the radio, I would take out my yearbook and look at the girl I liked. I was in third grade. I was in third grade laying on the floor, laying on the floor like, dude, that's, I didn't even like her that much. I'd just be in my room pretending to be in love. No one can blame. No, that song is so powerful. It was too powerful. The Goo Goo Doll songs. Because I don't think that they don't understand. I'd literally lay on the floor like, she's so beautiful. My dad would not. What the fuck are you doing? And nothing. I'm getting ready for football. I'm not looking. Oh man. That's a minute of that. What'd you do to that? That song used to fuck me up. If I'd be driving, I'd instantly just be like, oh my God, I have so much love. I mean, so I'm so in love with you. I don't want the world to even know. Do's were powerless to the Goo Goo Dolls. I don't know what kind of evil magic they did. Yeah. Even obviously the fucking strongest guys like us, the most masked dudes in the world most masked dudes became certified loveable. So fucking misunderstood. No one understands my love for you. That's you in school. It's like, hey, how are you? You ever think about kissing? I wouldn't. Oh man. That was the best in grade school and like, because also like girls would just like set up things to they'd be like, you know, you're her girl, your boyfriend, right? And you'd be like, what? You'd have like hold hands for five minutes and recess and be like, the holy shit you're like third grade. Like I have a fucking girlfriend right now. Yeah. Crazy. And then two days later, friends. Yeah. Two days later, they go, she's done. You guys have to break up now. You go home. You go. Oh fuck was that? Why'd she do that? Yeah, it literally happened to me. I remember they like tied our jackets together in the recess year. I'm just like stood there like this and then like two days later, like she's breaking up with you and I was like, okay. I said something really mean about her and I got in trouble. I don't care. She's flat. Yeah. She's fucking flat. I think I give a fuck. I mean, that is crazy that like you're in school as a kid and then the year like tits just come online and you just got you like you're expected to still do school. It's insane. Yeah. I mean, it's fucking nuts. I remember when tits came online and I was just kind of like, yeah, the fuck. Yeah, tits were crazy. What the fuck dude? It's, it was nuts. It's a lot. It's, it is. It's a lot of doubt. We're young guys. And then everyone just calls the girl who got tits a whore. Everyone is like, yeah, she's just slothed. She's huge tits. Fucking slut. Everyone fucked her. Even the teachers up. Yeah, whatever, whore. Can't believe this girl got boobs first. She must have had sex with everyone. As soon as school let out this summer, we all got mega laid. That's the best move. I again, I've that's the one thing I've never, never pussy lied. And it's like I've never regret it. I didn't know you could just do that. Yeah, her. Yeah, we fucked. I just keep moving. Yeah. I had a boy who hit the funniest pussy lie ever. He said he did. We asked her. She was like, no. Like, why'd you say did he fuck dude? He could have said anything. Yeah, we did. He fucked. He did. They need to be pussy liars need to be studied. Pussy lying is hilarious. It's so it's not even something you need to study. You know exactly where it comes. You don't think I want to pussy lie, dude. We all want to. We all want your boys to be like, damn, you're cool. Everybody wants to pussy. Like, you just can't. It's so fucking funny just to be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm doing it. I'm about to push that right now. OK, here we go. Yeah, pussy. I did a fuck. No, we've all liked for three years. Yeah, bro. I fucking did a fuck at the party. When? Yeah, this is fucking the other weekend. At the party when we're all there. I went outside and fuck there behind the house. He fucked her next to an HVAC unit on the side of the house. She's never seen someone as big as me. So funny. She's in the room at the lunch table. You go, hold on. Is that true? No. It's also funny just to be a seventh grade girl and just be like, what the fuck? Kind of did he fuck me? I'd be so mad. I'd be so mad. Someone claimed I'll just live in my is live in my day just chill and live in my life and someone's just like, yeah, that guy did he fucked you behind the fucking behind the recycling bin at the Rudoloske's house? Oh, yeah. All right, we did it. Let's switch over to the patch. We on my God bless. 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