Smosh Reads Reddit Stories

Am Eye The A**hole w/ Jacksepticeye | Reading Reddit Stories

64 min
Mar 21, 20262 months ago
Listen to Episode
Summary

Jacksepticeye joins Smosh to read and judge Reddit's 'Am I the Asshole' stories, discussing family dynamics, relationship communication, friendship expectations, and social etiquette through humorous commentary on real user submissions.

Insights
  • Family financial expectations create conflict when not communicated upfront; imposing monetary minimums on gatherings breeds resentment rather than cooperation
  • Long-distance relationships require explicit communication about gifts and timelines; vague promises without follow-through damage trust and create frustration
  • Tone and delivery matter more than intent in relationships; making someone feel stupid about knowledge gaps, even unintentionally, causes lasting hurt
  • Guest responsibilities include proactive cleaning and consideration for hosts, especially when bringing pets or items that impact shared spaces
  • Humor and levity can defuse tense situations, but context and audience reception determine whether it's appropriate or dismissive
Trends
Generational communication gaps in long-distance relationships, particularly with younger partners (20s) managing expectationsAlgorithmic content bubbles reducing shared cultural knowledge across age groups (Muhammad Ali example)Family financial dynamics becoming transactional, blurring lines between hospitality and obligationConflict resolution failures due to lack of direct communication and assumption-making in friend groupsEntitlement patterns in gift-giving where the giver expects gratitude without delivery or follow-through
Topics
Family Thanksgiving Etiquette and Cost-SharingLong-Distance Relationship CommunicationGift-Giving Expectations and ManipulationParenting and Guest ResponsibilityConflict Resolution in Friend GroupsFood Allergies and Child SafetyTone and Intent in RelationshipsPet Ownership and Guest ConsiderationsReddit Community Moderation (AITA subreddit)Generational Knowledge GapsFiancé Relationship DynamicsStranger Interaction BoundariesFinancial Transparency in RelationshipsHumor in Crisis SituationsAccountability and Apologies
Companies
Weight Watchers
Sponsored segment promoting their weight loss program with clinical trial results and member testimonials
Charlie Bigham's
Sponsored segment featuring new pan-fried noodle product line with the brand founder in kitchen demonstration
Carvana
Sponsored segment about car selling service with humorous testimonial about smooth transaction experience
Plum Centre
Opening ad read about relocated plumbing supply business with new location and promotional credit offer
People
Jacksepticeye
YouTube creator and gamer guest reading Reddit stories and providing commentary on relationship/social scenarios
Trevor
Co-host of the episode wearing matching outfit with Jacksepticeye, participating in story commentary
Shane
Co-host making observations and jokes throughout the Reddit story readings
Charlie Bigham
Featured in sponsored segment demonstrating new Asian pan-fried noodle products
Quotes
"Choose wisely, would have me staying home enjoying the peace and quiet of my living room for free"
Reddit commenter on Thanksgiving story
"It's always weird when money enters family, shit like that. Oh, yeah, it's messy."
Jacksepticeye
"You don't know who Muhammad Ali is? You dumb fucking idiot. He died for our sins. God."
Host (reading Reddit post)
"I think it's very reasonable if you're like, hey, I'd love to cook all the food for Thanksgiving. If you could just chip in 20 bucks or something."
Jacksepticeye
"There's simply too much shit. Yeah, there's simply too much shit."
Host discussing knowledge gaps
Full Transcript
Listen up North Leicester. Your Wallsley Plumman parts has changed to a Plum Centre. Better still, we've relocated to Unit 1 Progress Way at North Leicester Trade Park and we're open now. Same team, same know-how, same reliable stock, just way easier to get to. There's even a £100 credit when you open a new credit account by the 27th of May. Teas and Seas apply. Plum Centre, our Wallsley Plumman business. Wow, that was so cool to watch you do that. Yeah and we also have Trevor who wore the same outfit as me. Well actually I had it on first. Also my collars popped so it's like basically we're not... He's wearing your top. I watched you put it on. That's not even true, you can't prove that. I was there. Thanks for being here. Thank you, I'm so excited. So cool. Let's judge some people. For people watching, today we've been filming tons of videos. You've been in everything. Yes. You filmed a Try Not To Laugh, you filmed some games videos. We did Jackbox, yeah. And now you're here. First read a story, first Try Not To Laugh. This is big for me. This is my third video that's shown today. Dude, you guys are like... We're getting married after this. I think we should kiss, yeah. That's how you definitely get the Smosh E-Goth. Am I the asshole for thinking Trevor should kiss me today? And you've watched plenty of clips from this show, right? Yes. Yeah. I think a lot of these are very... I was so happy when you read Poopknife. Yeah, finally got that one. Are you much of a Redditor? Oh gosh. Answer carefully. Do I say no or do I say yes and be cringe? It's damned if you do, damned if you don't. I go on Reddit for like gaming stuff. Sure. So it's like gaming news and whatever. And stuff always ends up there first. Yeah. And like leaks and whatever. So I'm on there a lot more than I think I would like to be. Okay. Trevor, thoughts? Trevor, what do you think? How are you? No, I feel like you guys said it really well. I didn't think that I needed to add anything else. Are you a Redditor? Oh no. Oh God. No. And I don't even mean... I just don't... I don't go on Reddit. If I do it's because I'm trying to look something up and figure something out. It's always like a medical question or something. Honestly, I think that's probably how I'm on Reddit most as well. Yeah. Am I dying Reddit? Yeah. Or something like a game. I'm like, how do I do this thing? But no, I don't like scroll on Reddit. I'm not lurking any subreddits or anything. That's true. I don't have a subreddit I go to. What's your Reddit wrapped like? Not much. I do sometimes go on and I get caught up in an Am I the Asshole story, but I'm reading it and then I'm like, wait, I shouldn't do this. Yeah. Like I... Even for the stage. This is work. I don't need this. You can't bring work home. Yeah. Yeah. No. I'll solve this later. You got some good stuff for us today? I think so. Okay. I haven't read them, but I'm about to. Okay. Reddit. I sure hope he did. Nice. Don't give him a hint. Okay. Let's hop into these stories. Our first story comes from Am I the Asshole posted in November of 2025. Would I be the asshole for refusing to bring $100 minimum to Thanksgiving? Okay. Let's see what's going on here. Okay. My family and I celebrate Thanksgiving every year with my siblings, parents and their kids, roughly 20 to 25 people, including kids. My family is only two people with one six month old baby. In the group chat, it was decided that my nephew would cook meat since he bought a grill. He also told us that we could bring the sides. He chose to spend $300 on meat. I messaged in the group chat that we could bring mashed potatoes. My sister responded that every family has to bring $100 worth of food minimum or help my nephew pay for the meat. I'm not totally against the idea of bringing that much food, but just the way it was presented and the fact that it wasn't agreed to beforehand makes me upset. The following day in the group chat, my sister said, option one, bring food enough for everyone, not just yourself. Option two, help Thomas pay for meat, $100 slash family. Option three, help dad pay water bill, $200 a family. Choose wisely. Upset. I responded with option four, don't show up. Am I being an asshole if I don't show up at all in protest to this $100 minimum rule? What the? That's insane. Choose wisely. Hey, you want to come over to Thanksgiving and, God, could you just chip in a little for the water bill? Yeah, and also you have to pay my rent. Yeah. We're looking to get an extension on the house and like, ugh, I really use the money. Pay off my house. Yeah, this is just absurd. I think it's always weird when money enters family, shit like that. Oh, yeah, it's messy. I think it's very reasonable if you're like, hey, I'd love to cook all the food for Thanksgiving. If you could just chip in 20 bucks or something, just be buying everything, especially if you're younger or whatever. But asking someone being like, hey, I chose to buy $300 of meat, so can you just reimburse me for that? I bought $300 of meat and I can't afford it. Yeah, to be clear, what the family is asking for is that between the two of them and their six-month-old, they're asking them to spend like a $50 meal. It's like, hey, you could just go to a really nice restaurant instead of going to the family dinner. Is it a thing at Thanksgiving because I don't celebrate it? Like, you bring a piece of food. Yeah, you bring like your own dish. It's like they would bring mashed potatoes. Someone else brings green beans. And it's 20 to 25 people if everybody brought like a couple sides, which is doesn't have to be $100. No, that's why I'm putting like... It would be plenty food. That's what I'm also wondering is like, when you say like $100 of mashed potatoes, it's like enough to fill this room. Yeah. Like potatoes are like, all that's in mashed potatoes is like potatoes and milk and butter. It's like, yeah. It's a lot of potatoes. It's a lot of potatoes. It's weird to be like, bring money instead of just being like, bring outside. How do you quantify that too? It's like, are they checking? It's like, did you spend $100? Show me the receipt. Yeah, bring me the receipt from around. Yeah. And they also have the option to bring enough food for everyone, not just yourself. It's like, if everyone brings enough food for everyone, this house is overloaded with food. Yeah. You have excess. Yeah. These are like about $300 worth of meat and it's like eight ounces of wagyu. Yeah. Also to be clear, if all the families help pay the water bill, $200 a family, how much is that water bill? That's a thousand dollar water bill. How much water? Way more. Dad's like, well, I'm always in the shower. We felt the kiddie pool. We thought it was fun. We really wanted to have it for Thanksgiving. The verdict was not the asshole poo mode. Like so extremely poo mode. Yeah. It's what it's just, it's voted into oblivion. It's just like, everyone's like, no. My God. Is that what it's called? It's rare. It's rare. Poom mode. Comments, not the asshole. This is a potluck, not a charity dinner. If your nephew couldn't afford to buy the meat, he shouldn't have bought it. 15,000 upvotes. Someone said the math isn't mathing. $300 divided amongst 20 to 25 people is not $100 per family. Someone said the math isn't mathing and just basic communication isn't communicating. This whole situation is a complete zoo. Someone said, how did the water bill become part of the discussion? I'm wondering, does son live with the sister and is it her running this Thanksgiving grift rather than saying we can't afford to pay our bills? Someone said, don't forget petty option number five, buy $100 worth of mashed potato ingredients and show up with 50 pounds of mashed potatoes. Not the asshole, $100 worth of sides per family is obscene and far too much food. Someone said, choose wisely, would have me staying home enjoying the peace and quiet of my living room for free, not the asshole. We have a small little update. My first update. Your first update. Oh my god. Can you make a bigger deal out of this, please? It's just such a small one. Do you want me to make a big deal out of it though? If you could. Okay, okay, okay, okay. All right. And then, oh, it seems here we have update. Oh my god. He said it. Oh my god. Oh my god. The food was made out of mashed potatoes. Oh my god. They killed the father. Oh, that's what I would do. I think not the asshole. They filled the kiddie pool and drowned him in it. With mashed potatoes. With mashed potatoes. They filled it with bad meals and killed him in it. Oh, I'm sick. Okay, update. I'm a teacher and she posted a picture of my salary she found online to shame me in the group chat. Definitely not going now. Whoa. This family's awful. She said, you can't pay our water bill? Broke. Like what? What a nightmare. This you? Yeah, Jesus. All right. Yeah. Don't go and probably don't show up to any family function. This is the thing about Thanksgiving, right? Where you're kind of like the meme is that, oh, I got to go see my family. Yeah. It's always tumultuous. If you're having that shit on top of it, I'm like, I'm staying home with my $100 and getting dinner. If the shit like that is happening before you even show up, yeah, it's going to be so bad. Holy God. There's no Thanksgiving equivalent. No, even Spencer was messaging me and he was like, got time off. He's like, what do you guys do during Thanksgiving? I'm like, it's Thursday. Yeah. It's literally just another day. We have nothing. But I guess still, I think it's the same for Christmas. Well, like families get together and do have dinner. To me, Thanksgiving feels like first Christmas. Like that is what it is. It's kind of feels the same. The gathering feels the same. It's like a warm up. A warm up Christmas. It truly is. Practice your recipes. So that's, I mean, that's about as close as we would get is Christmas. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, if I wanted to see my family, I would. I'm not going. Yeah. Don't need another excuse to avoid you. When it comes to weight loss, you don't need more advice. You need more of what works. That's Weight Watchers with real tools designed to take the guesswork out of what to eat, how to move, and how to build habits that actually last. That's why Weight Watchers members lose more weight. Real people, real results. Weight Watchers Core Plus. Get started at WeightWatchers.com. In a six month clinical trial of over 370 people, those using Weight Watchers saw significantly better results than those following standard nutritional advice alone. See the 2025 study published in the AJCN. This is the new Weight Watchers, built for real life and real results. No matter what mode you're in, Maddie went all in for her big day and lost 33 pounds. Emily lost 85 pounds and hit her goal while still living her life. Weight Watchers gave me the tools and I feel amazing. Join the millions of members and lose weight with the number one doctor recommended weight loss program. Lose more at WeightWatchers.com. At six months, participants in a clinical trial of Weight Watchers program lost an average of 12 pounds. I'm in the kitchen with Charlie Bigham. So what have we got here, Charlie? My brand new pan-fried pad thai noodles. Noodles? But you're Mr Fish Pie Guy. Guilty. And what? Ovens, roulette roasting. The pan is king of noodling. Whether it's pad thai, yakisoba or laxer, finding that perfect texture is a bottomless noodle rabbit hole. But all I have to do is stir it in the pan for six minutes, right? Bingo. Try the new Charlie Bigham's Asian Pan-Fry Noodle Range, handmade in my kitchen. Pan-fried in yours. I sold my car in Carvana last night. Well, that's cool. No, you don't understand. It went perfectly. Real offer down to the penny. They're picking it up tomorrow. Nothing went wrong. So what's the problem? That is the problem. Nothing in my life goes to smoothie. I'm waiting for the catch. Maybe there's no catch. That's exactly what a catch would want me to think. Wow, you need to relax. I need to knock on wood. Do we have wood? Is this table wood? I think it's laminated. Okay. Yeah, that's good. That's close enough. Car selling without a catch. So your car today on Carvana. Pick up these man ply. Back to the show. All right. Our next story. This comes from Am I the Asshole? It's supposed to November of 2025. Am I the asshole for expressing my surprise that my fiance didn't know who Muhammad Ali was? This is a sentence that's never been spoken. Expression my surprise. All I did was express my surprise. You dumb fucking idiot. How do you not know who Muhammad Ali is? You dumb ass. He died for our sins. God. Hi. The other day, my fiance and I were watching baseball and the infographic and commentary were showing some stats of Babe Ruth. So I told her, she doesn't really watch that much baseball, that Babe Ruth was like the Muhammad Ali of baseball. She asked me who Muhammad Ali was. And I said, you know, Muhammad Ali, she was still confused. And I realized she didn't know who Muhammad Ali was. So I said, how do you not know who Muhammad Ali is? And I told her about him. I noticed she was quiet afterwards. So I asked if she was good. And she said she was hurt at the way I had been surprised at her not knowing who Muhammad Ali was. If I have to keep saying that I said he wasn't just a boxer. He was a cultural icon. So it just took me by surprise that she didn't know who he was. Then yesterday she came across something on her Instagram and was showing it to me. It was about Timothy Chalamet and Kylie Jenner. She asked me what I thought about her. And I said, I actually don't know a lot about her. I know of her, but not why she's famous. She then famed surprise and was like, you don't know who Kylie Jenner is. I realized she was still hurt over the Muhammad Ali thing. So I didn't say anything. I didn't point out that it wasn't really the same thing. Kylie Jenner wasn't an icon the way Muhammad Ali was. And I had heard of her anyway, but she seems still to be hurt by what I said. Was I the asshole? Edit going to put some of my replies here. A lot of people are asking about our ages. I'm 29. She's 27. And as for how I reacted in the moment. So when the infographic popped up, I said, Babe Ruth is like the Muhammad Ali of baseball. She said, who's Muhammad Ali? I honestly thought maybe she knew multiple important Muhammad Ali's. So I said, you know, Muhammad Ali. And she still didn't recognize him and again said Muhammad Ali who? And then I just said, in a regular tone, how do you not know who Muhammad Ali is? She said, why would I know of some Muhammad Ali? And then I was stunned for a couple seconds. Maybe that showed on my face. And then I went over who he was. Oh, God. I just, I fear that this is giving like, I don't trust men on Reddit to accurately represent the way that they said something. Yeah. I just can't believe in my heart that if it actually happened that way that she would have been upset. You dumb fucking idiot. I have to believe it's something like you don't know who Muhammad Ali is. Like, you don't know Muhammad. Like, what do you mean? Shadowboxing. Yeah. It's, it's such a bummer when people do that. Yeah. Right. Like it does hurt. Yeah. Even if you're like, you're, you know, I should know who or what. Even just for a movie. It's like you haven't seen Monster's Inc. And it happens all the time. Yeah. I get feeling that, like being like, oh, like making you feel like dumb or something like you don't know Kylie Jenner, the Muhammad Ali of the Kardashian. That time she just knocked out Kim. Incredible. I think there's like, he's absolutely right in that Muhammad Ali is like this huge big icon. There's also a lot of icons in history and it's okay that someone doesn't know one of them. Yeah. Like, I just think it's like, especially if it's an interest, it's always an opportunity to be like, oh, like, let me tell you about this awesome person. It's cool that I get to tell you about this. Yeah. Especially like, I think it's very reasonable for like a 27 year old woman to not know. Like if you're not like very into sports, like, yeah, completely understand. I don't think it's out of this world. Like, like it's very much, especially nowadays with the way the internet is so algorithmic, where you kind of get served your interests over and over again. It actually makes more sense nowadays. It's like, yeah, you probably don't know because it's, is it not in your field of interest. Then yeah, you probably, the internet never shows it to you. I think growing up as like 30 plus year old, it's like, Muhammad Ali is like everywhere that even if you don't know who he is, like that name is just synonymous with everything. Yeah. But I feel like now it's come full circle where it's not anymore. Yeah, I mean, I'm kind of left pop culture. I'm 26. And I'm like, yeah, I, there are plenty of people I know probably that don't know who Muhammad Ali is like that's fine. You could have just, he just said LeBron. I feel like more people don't know who Babe Ruth is. It's also possible. I think it's possible for a lot of people not to know, besides like that it's the candy bar. Yeah. And a lot of them, like people don't know, like they don't know anything about the person. They just know of the name. The name. Yeah. Right. It's like you hear about Martin Luther King or Gandhi. It's like, I don't know anything about Gandhi. I just know the name. Right. It sounds like a chill dude. I just think what, what we're dealing with here is, is he made her feel stupid. Right. He's just like, you don't know this. It's insane. You don't know this thing. And that's going to make a person feel insecure. And so now she's like doing this. The gloves are up. Like a hammered. Truly. Hey, who's that? Babe Ruth of boxing. Oh, thank you. The Kylie Jenner of boxing. The Kylie Jenner of boxing. For someone who knows of him, it's like, oh, he's such a legend because not only was he like such a legendary boxer, but he also like opposed the Vietnam War and was like very much like a vocal person in a time where that was like pretty extreme. I honestly didn't know that. Yeah. No, he was extremely vocal on so many things that even by today's standards, you'd be like, whoa. So he really was truly like a legendary figure. So for people who know him, I get the like feeling of like, whoa, you don't know who this guy is. Like, but she's 27 in an era where the internet is so different. I think it's I'm like, yeah. And she's not sitting here going, what is he some dumb ass? She's like, no, I don't I don't know. And but she's open to hearing. Yeah. It's always like a teaching moment to be like, yes, but please tell me. Yeah. I think for a lot of people, it's like they know he's a boxer. That's it. I think there's a lot of people. It's like, do you know who Lucille Ball is? Do you know who Carol Burnett is? Like I think her field could probably have a lot. There's a lot of people out there that it's like making that Venn diagram. Yeah. It's especially when you're talking about people who were really legendary back in the 60s, 70s, like I love Vasswell. I can name like every player on like the Showtime Lakers. But like, yeah, I know who Muhammad Ali is, but I don't know. Yeah, it's not really a flex. Oh, no, flex. And Sean loves Dr. J. So, you know, yeah, but anyways, Dr. J. I have no idea who that is. Julie Serving. Ooh, basketball. That's the one. We have some comments. There was really no verdict. The verdict overall was no assholes here, but a lot of comments are all over the spectrum. I think this is like a very mild, am I the asshole? I feel like this is one of the more relatable ones where everyone has someone who's done this to them. I think this is a very accurate use of this subreddit, right? Because sometimes it gets so extreme where it's like, you need to talk to like your friends and family. Yeah. Yeah. I shot my husband. Am I the asshole? It's like, hey, but this one's a really perfect one because it's one of those where it's like, yeah, I can see what's going on here. But we have some comments. Someone said, this just makes me think of the XKCD comic where there are two ways to handle someone not knowing a specific reference. You could be an ass and say, how can you not know about this? Everyone knows about it. Or you could go in with genuine excitement and go, you don't know about this thing? Let me share with you how awesome this is. How did you go about it? And we don't know. Someone said, this sounds like no one's the asshole, honestly, just that you're both being kind of obtuse and you'd better communicate a little better or you're going to end up on the rocks. I realized she didn't know who Muhammad Ali was. So I said, how do you not know who Muhammad Ali is? Tone matters a lot. Even if you don't think your tone was insulting, half of it is how it's taken. You should probably have a quiet conversation and just genuinely apologize because she's clearly hurt. It's not as hard as it sounds to just say, hey, I'm really sorry. I should have been more thoughtful the other day. So it didn't seem like I was talking down to you. I promise I wasn't, but I'm sorry I was careless about it. Lastly, someone said, the way this is worded, it seems like you think you're better than or smarter than your girlfriend. I'm sure that's what she's picking up on, you're the asshole. I think it's true. Tone kind of shifts this in a bunch of different directions. I think Reddit armchair therapist always comes out in these scenarios where they're like, if I was in this scenario, I would have reacted this way and you always kind of like pick a side. I think the way it's worded shows sort of a pattern, like why somebody reacted the way they do is probably because this has happened numerous times. Yeah. Or they're kind of like at their wicks end where they're like, dude, why do you always react this way? Just tell me. You don't have to be an asshole about it. Yeah. I think there's a very great lesson in this of just like, hey, even if you didn't intend something in a certain way, your partner, if they take it in a way and it makes them feel something, it's like they're feeling that. You can't change that. Even if it wasn't your intention, it's like just be like, hey, I really didn't mean it to come across like that. I'm really sorry I made you feel that way. And this is probably the best situation to learn that lesson in. Something very low stakes to be like, oh, I can have a takeaway from this. That communication is coming in every single relationship. I think it's important in a relationship to clock to when it's like, oh, are we in a battle of who wins right now? Like who wins and who loses? As opposed to just like, oh, wait, like you feel hurt. I said something that you were hurt by. Like, yeah, let's figure that out. Yeah. Which usually, I mean, any of the people I've met, not like partners, but any friends who are like, you don't know who this is, it's a chance for them to feel superior. Totally. And I think that's where the dangerous side effects come in where no one's right. You just don't know a thing. Yeah. Not knowing a thing doesn't make you stupid. Not knowing something and not always wanting to know something. Like, I don't know. There's too much shit. Yeah. Yeah, there's simply too much shit. What is our doing with the random people that nobody would know? You don't know my buddy Eric? Like what? Dude, you don't know Steve. That's crazy. What do you mean, dude? Are you fucking You don't know how to get to that restaurant later? What the fuck is wrong with you? Random pivot. You said they're at their wicks end and I realize, I feel like I've heard wits end. I think, yeah, I've heard both my whole life. But wicks end makes way more sense. I think I've actually at the end of their wick and at their wits end, I think I mixed them. But at the wicks end makes sense because it's about to explode. There's nothing left to burn. Dynamite's about to blow up. Yeah, I was thinking like a candle. Like a candle with a little owl. Explosive is crazy. You went like, well, yeah, because when people are at their wicks end, they're going to explode. Because not just die out and just. Dynamite has a fuse. It doesn't have a wick. Oh, got ya. Checkmate. Am I the asshole for calling out Shane on a Reddit story? Oh, Vokab, Shane. He hit me. He smacked me. Update. And the shot of me above him like. There's your thumbnail. I found out that those things I think are called egg corns. That the term is called that because some people think acorns are called egg corns. So it's when you mix up words like that and say it a different way, it's called an egg corn. I hope to God someday to meet someone who calls it an egg corn. So I'm going to be like, did you just say egg corn? You're going to have a Reddit story. Do you not know egg corn? You're going to have a Reddit story written about you. This guy's never seen an oak tree. I met a guy on the street who just started hitting me for no reason. Yeah. Shane beat me up. Am I the asshole for getting my ass beat? All right. Our next story. Am I the asshole from November of 2025? Damn, November big month. Yeah, big month for assholes. Am I the asshole for refusing to pay to have my friend's house cleaned? I had to quickly come down to the city where I grew up due to the death of a close family member. It was a pretty spur of the moment occurrence and I had to drop things rather quickly. I informed one of my friends and they offered to put me up for a few days. I said that would be great, but told them I'd have my dogs with me. So totally understood if they wouldn't be able to. The friend said it would be fine and they were more than happy to host me. For context, my dogs are not badly trained, but by any standard, but they are both large breed dogs, a lab in a German shepherd. So of course can be a bit much for many non dog owners. I am aware of this and that's why I usually don't bring them to people's houses. I made the five hour drive down and my friend came out to greet me. When unpacking the car, I let the dogs out and immediately they went off to toilet, since it was a long trip. My lab went into the bushes to pee, but the German shepherd began to pee in the middle of the front porch. Don't ask me why, but she much prefers peeing on hard surfaces. And my friend immediately freaked out. I was a bit confused and apologized, but it's outside, so I didn't get why she was so freaked out. The dogs were fine the entire stay. They are non eventful inside. They let me know when they need to go out and I cleaned up the poo straight away. I keep them under good supervision. At the end of the trip, my friend sent me a text saying, hey, as you know, the house is quite messy because of the dogs and I'm going to hire a cleaner. Would you mind paying me for that? I was a bit taken aback. The dogs had zero accidents inside, didn't break anything. I asked what she meant and she explained that there was dog hair everywhere. The thing is, they are shedding dogs. I know that. If she'd asked me to vacuum up after them, I would have, but she didn't. I also didn't think a deep clean would be necessary. A quick vacuum of the carpets, couch bed, etc. would be more than enough to remove any trace. I don't know what to do. I didn't ask to stay with her. She offered. I told her about my dogs and she was fine with that. That's, I... Was it just asking for money? So the verdict is asshole. I can see it because dogs, yeah, they do shed. Like animals shed, they bring a lot of stuff with them. It might have behoove this person to like talk about it while they were staying there. Because to like have them leave and then send a text to be like, hey, I'm going to need this money. I can see how it now causes a weird situation, but I'm also a little surprised OP isn't like fair. Like the dog stayed here for a few days and yeah, this happens. Yeah. I think it's crazy to me that OP didn't like really clean at all. Like if I'm taking my dogs that shed into a house where someone doesn't have dogs and I know my dog shed, I'm going to try and clean up as much as I can. Like I'm asking, hey, do you have a vacuum? Like I'd love to like make sure things are as clean as possible. Like I think the fact that they were like, oh yeah, like they're just my dogs. They're shedding dogs. Like that comes from a place of like, oh, I have them and I'm fine with it. So I expect you to be fine with it kind of thing. You're bringing them into their space. Yeah. I think it's very, I think it's reasonable for them to be like, hey, I want to hire a cleaner. Like, I don't know, maybe he can be like, hey, I'd love to like, you know, help pay for it or something like that. Like if they don't, if it is like a lot of money, but yeah, I don't think it's unreasonable. Plus we, like you said, we don't know the state of the house. Like it's not just hair and stuff. We don't know. It's cells. It's true. It's a whole bunch. Yeah, OP says, oh, well, they didn't ask me to clean up. It's like, well, you know, you could have done it. It's one of those where I'm a little biased from growing up with so many animals that I'm not. It's not something I'm bothered by personally, but some people really are. And it doesn't take long. Yeah. Yeah, you always have those people like you bring their dog over and they start licking people. Like, oh my God, I'm so sorry. Like, I'm imposing on you. I'm bothering you. Sure. Being here. Sure. Let's see some of the comments. Someone said, so let me get this straight. And I say this as an owner of one lab, but have had two at the same time in the past. A friend allows you to stay with two large shedding dogs at the last minute and you make no effort to vacuum or otherwise contribute to cleaning before you leave. I'd be so embarrassed to leave without cleaning after staying that I'd have paid for the cleaner in a heartbeat. You appear incredibly entitled and disrespectful to your friend and a clear asshole. 11,000 upvotes. Someone said she's not used to pet hair. You saved money by staying with her instead of a hotel and dog boarding. Paying for a cleaning will still have saved you money. Someone replied to that saying, given that OP didn't even seem to see the problem with the dog peeing on the front porch, I'm guessing OP's hygiene standards are pretty damned low. And a shepherd in a lab in the house for several days means that there's going to be a lot of hair everywhere. Someone said, you should have vacuumed without her having to ask during and before you left. You have dogs that shed. You should have been overly conscious about making sure the place is clean before you left and during your stay. Especially if it's a non-dog household. Someone lastly said, pay her. 1.2,000 upvotes. Yeah, I have two dogs and I take them on walks twice a day. But we have a patio and we have a grass pad on the patio and a little doggy door. So they can go out during the day to pee if they need to. And every once in a while, one of them will pee on the concrete. And I hate that. I'm like, no, I don't want, even if it's outside, that's just dried pee now on the concrete. I'm out there rinsing it off, getting the water. Being like your dog peeing on the front porch of somebody else's home. I would be mortified if my dog did that. Like if I took him somewhere and they just started like peeing on the porch. It would be like, yeah. I think it's an important factor of this is that they stayed here for free. Like they stayed there for free. So yes, paying for a cleaning is going to still be saving you a lot of money compared to the hotel and everything. Jumping into this person's life, you should be helping out where you can. Right. Instead of taking more from them. Right, absolutely. I did stay at a friend's house one time where they had big shedding dogs and there was hair everywhere. And I was like, okay, friends are coming over later. And I was like, are we going to clean up? And I was like, no, not really. But it was so much hair everywhere that I even cleaned up. And I'm like, I'm staying at your house and you don't see. Yeah. They hear everyone like, you're okay with it, but I don't think everybody else is. Right. You can. It's, I think it's possible for people to get just very used to their situation. Yeah. But yeah, when you're a guest somewhere, it's just so important to be like mindful of like the impact you're having on the place you're staying in. Especially we don't know how clean the house was before. And yeah, I'm really kind of curious to see, because I have a feeling it's very possible that this was all like worse than we thought. Yeah. Isn't that kind of the thing like leave it how you found it? Totally. Kind of energy. 100%. And yeah, finding out that they didn't even try to clean. I let your friend, yeah. Yeah. It's like, okay. Yeah. It's tough. Yikes. Anyways, moving on. Our first asshole. Yeah. It's rare that OP is the asshole. I know. Our next story. Am I the asshole for not letting a kid eat my food? Oh, I love this already. I love a title like that. That just gets me so excited. Yeah. Here we go. This was posted in October. The other day I was at the mall with my boyfriend and our two kids, a girl who's five and a boy who's six. We were sitting eating a bag of roasted chestnuts when this kid around 10 years old starts hovering around us. Now I admit I'm not the biggest fan of any kid that doesn't belong to me. So this alone was already annoying me slightly, but I still smiled at him. Then he calls my son over and whispers in his ear and I knew it was about the chestnuts. My son nods yes and the boy comes up to me and reaches for a chestnut. I moved the bag and said, no, you have to go ask your parents. My boyfriend got upset, called me rude and handed a chestnut to the boy. The boy leaves and I tell my boyfriend he shouldn't have done that. That you don't just give food to a strange kid. The boy then hovers back around us and without a word snatches two chestnuts from the bag that my boyfriend was now holding. I stood up and said very firmly, sorry, but you can't take our stuff like that. Go to your parents. He put them back and ran off. I think the kid had no manners and I wasn't going to let my kids think it's okay to accept anything from strangers or that it's okay to be pressured into sharing. My boyfriend doesn't agree and thinks the kid trusted us because we had kids ourselves. He thinks I was just selfish. So am I the asshole? No, I think that the policy of not giving food to a child without asking their parents first is 100% always the right thing. You should never just give food to a kid like if their parents- Especially any form of nuts. Yeah, that kid could just fucking die because he's stupid and being like, oh yeah, I want whatever's in that bag and you could just die on the spot. Yeah, that's true. Now you killed that kid. Hey, am I the asshole for killing a kid? For killing a kid. I'm in the kitchen with Charlie Bigum. So what have we got here, Charlie? My brand new pan-fried pad thai noodles. Noodles? But you're Mr. Fish Pie Guy. Guilty. And while ovens rule at roasting, the pan is king of noodling. Whether it's pad thai, yakisoba or laxer, finding that perfect texture is a bottomless noodle rabbit hole. But all I have to do is stir it in the pan for six minutes, right? Bingo. Try the new Charlie Bigum's Asian Pan-Fried Noodle Range, handmade in my kitchen. Pan-fried in yours. He came up and asked for it, so am I the asshole? I like the concept of asking someone if you can eat someone else's food. Like seeing someone eating something and just me asking a random person like, can I have that guy's chips? Can I have Shane's lunch? Oh yeah, you should. I'd encourage it. Take it, dude. Give me nut. Give me now, me wanty. Yeah, no, she is 100% right for just multiple reasons. Yeah. The verdict was not the asshole. Comments, not the asshole, your boyfriend could have killed the kid. How does your boyfriend know the kid is not allergic to nuts? Absolutely never give food to kids without talking to the parents first. Someone also said, also don't want a strange kid's hand in my food. Someone said, not the asshole, you have no idea if this kid might be allergic or if his parents want him having this food. It is also dangerous that this boy thinks it is okay to take things from strangers. I would have handled it by asking him to talk to his parents and then maybe giving him one with their approval as a lesson to everyone. But you certainly were not in the wrong for simply saying no. Someone said, remember when your parents warns you about not eating food from a stranger? Someone said, no one's the asshole here based on your description. This kid may be hungry and knows the best option is to seek out other kids being fed. Like a stray kid. This awful. I live in an area with a lot of poverty. My two kids always have snacks to share. One has literally earned the nickname snacks by her schoolmates. And I would have just asked the kid if they were hungry and either shared or gotten them something to eat. But I am a softie and don't believe a child should ever go hungry if I can help. Lastly, someone said, you don't give strange kids nuts. Yeah. I'm going to take a different approach. Okay. Like the fisherman. Feed a kid a nut. He's going to go hungry again. But teach a kid how to get chestnuts himself. True. That's what you should have done. You take that nut and before you hit it to him, you dig a hole, you plant it, water it, be like, come back in 20 years. You could come back in 60 years. You'll have some chestnuts. And that chestnut grew up to be Barack Obama. So it really makes you think. Yeah, really. Who? You don't know Barack Obama. You don't know Barack Obama. He's like the Ed Sheeran of Presidents. Wow. Well, okay. All right. We're going to keep that one in. Yeah, again, as Michael Jordan said, fuck them kids. Yeah. His greatest legacy is that. I just have a thing for like, I'm even like a dog at the table getting food. I don't like things being around me being like, it's my food. Leave me alone. Totally. My nut. I got nut. I climbed the street. Yeah. Something very scary is a rogue 10-year-old. Yeah. You're just somewhere and a 10-year-old shows up. That's scary. That's a scary age. It is. Yeah. It's just like, oh, they'll do whatever. He rips off his mask. He's like, this is a test. Never give kid a nut. Yeah, I've got a 10 on the kid who gave kid nut. Yeah, fuck a mule. I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with just saying no to a kid who wants your food. Well, especially when you're a stranger. You're allowed to say no to anyone. You can say it kindly. You can be like, hey, sorry, like, I don't know, like go find your parents, whatever. Like there's nice ways to just be like, hey, sorry, buddy, I actually can't give you any of this. People on the internet are obsessed with finding the exact perfect solution to stuff like this. Being like, if I was in this scenario, what would I have done? Okay, mind palace. And then they get into the weeds of it and they get the exact perfect answer. They get the good ending. Yeah. But it's like, you can just say no and that's fine. Like, no dude. Our next story. Am I the asshole for not checking my phone when a friend bailed to meet us? Okay. Okay. I, a 28 year old man, and four of my friends, also all 28, finally managed to hang out after over a year of everyone being slammed with work and relationships. We all agreed to meet at this indie cinema doing a marathon of a movie series we once watched together in college. Right next to the cinema is a cafe we used to practically live in. I messaged the group saying, let's meet at the cinema early to grab seats and thought everyone would know the drill. Two of us showed up at the same time and since the theater wasn't open yet, we went into the cafe to hang out and sent a photo to our group. Rick showed up a bit later but walked straight into the theater since it was open and by that time we were already there. We figured he'd realize and come over. Our last friend, Mark, never showed. About 20 minutes in, I noticed my phone was still on silent from work and saw one single missed call from Mark. Turns out he'd been sitting in his car in the rain, looking for us outside the cinema, didn't see anyone, didn't call anyone else, and decided we ditched him. He went home and later sent a bunch of angry texts and a long voice message full of frustration and swearing. He said we ghosted him and that he was sick of being the afterthought. I even offered to pay for a ticket to the next showing but he said it was too late and refused. So am I the asshole for not checking my phone and assuming he would know we left the cafe and got to the cinema when it opened? I'm gonna say no. I fear that that is a crazy thing too. If you are going with a group of people and you only call one person one time and that's all of the reaching out and then you're like, well they don't care about me, they ditched me, I'm an afterthought, that's unreasonable. And you're sitting in your car waiting for an answer? Yeah, I like just reach out to a few people, try and like text call a couple people, whoever it is, like or yeah go inside and look around. Even a kid can go look for nut. Yeah. Yeah. True. No, just talk to people. Get up, go do your thing, go look for people. Sure. Look, I'm saying this as a 35 year old man, you're in charge of your own shit. Yeah. I could see that. Your friends aren't in charge of how you deal with this situation, I don't think. I think if you, if like there is kind of an argument I think for him to be like, oh like I was supposed to be there and like not anyone like checked on me or like did look at their phone, but again like that's not their fault necessarily. Yeah, if there's a pattern of them doing this all the time then maybe, but we don't have context. We don't have context on that. To be clear, they sent a photo of them all hanging out at the cafe. Yeah, wait. Yeah. They established they're there. Oh yeah. They established that at the cafe because the theater hasn't opened yet. And not only that, but the other friend just walked in, he didn't see that. Went in. Yeah. Went to the theater. Go at least go into the theater to find out. Maybe he actually just hates whatever movie series that we're going to watch. Maybe he found an excuse to leave. He was like, oh I'm so sick of watching the Critters movies. We're watching all the Critters movies. The verdict was everyone sucks. I'm so curious why. I'm very curious too. I wonder if the take is kind of more like just that overall as a group like they also didn't check their phone. Like they just assumed like, oh he didn't show up. We're not going to check. There's that element. They didn't like also try to reach out to him. It just feels like a very like kind of distant friend group in a way where it's like, hey like if your friend's not showing up to the big movie marathon, are you going to at least text him too to be like, hey where are you at? Yeah, also there's no like group chat between these friends to kind of like. I think there is is what's weird. Why text that one friend? Text the group chat. I guess I'm a little, it is confusing. This is one of those where I'm not like this person's the wrong, this person's the wrong. I'm just kind of like what's going on? Listen, you've been in that scenario where like you're all in a group. Time passes way faster than you think. You're all catching up on each other. It just kind of slips your mind. It seems like so many stupid things had to happen for it to get to this point. Totally. Like there's no, yeah, I don't know. It's a lot of non-communication. Comments, everyone sucks here. You should have communicated better. Sending a picture in a group chat isn't the same as a quick message to say where you are. It's also not ideal to have your phone on silent and not be checking it regularly when you're planning to meet people. At the same time, Mark should have probably messaged the group chat too to see where everyone was. I can't imagine not at the bare minimum texting my friend who no showed. Someone replied to that saying, I can't imagine going to meet a group of friends and not thinking about calling other friend when other friend doesn't answer my phone. Someone said info. Is Mark in the same group chat? Did he not receive the message about the change? Oh, he said we didn't end up changing it. Maybe I didn't express myself very well since I'm really tired, but we waited for like 10 minutes at the cafe, took a picture to show the boys. Yes, he's in the group chat. And I said in the group chat that we were waiting there for the cinema to open. We went in as soon as it opened, but I didn't say we were going in that moment. Someone replied to that saying, I'm going to go with a soft everyone sucks here. You and the rest of the group didn't say anything to Mark beyond a picture of all of you still on the cafe, but he also should have made more of an effort to contact the group than just the one phone call. It sounds like it wasn't malicious and maybe Mark's been sitting on some resentment for a while, but everyone contributed to the miscommunication. Yeah. I'm putting myself in Mark's scenario where other friend goes in, doesn't see the other text. He knows, oh, maybe they're not here. I don't see them at the cafe. I'm just going to go in. That's our plan. I think that's what you do. I'm putting myself in his position where I'm like, I have a lot of control in that scenario. I'm not just going to sit and pout in my car and be like, no one cares about me. And then also to send such angry messages afterwards, I feel like it's really unfair. Yeah. It's also a cinema. So it's a place where people might silence their phones. I would certainly, especially if I showed up late or later than everyone, I'd be like, oh, maybe they're in the theater and their phones are silent. I think that there was an opportunity for the other friends to be more considerate and like, go check and reach out, whatever. Totally. But I don't think that they're necessarily in the wrong for not doing like that. Like he sucks for reacting the way he did and he could have, there's just so much more. Just take a step outside, walk inside. The plan to watch the movie didn't change. It was just to meet up beforehand. So it's like, you just assumed they weren't there? I don't understand that. It's very confusing to me. And I think what Mark is feeling is just, he just feels sad that the group chat didn't contact him or care that he... Which can, it does not. There's something hurtful there. But it just feels, to me, this is like not a matter of assholes. I'm just like, guys, come on. Again, just talk to each other. You guys need to talk to each other better. This is how old everyone was. Yeah. They're all like 28. Like dude, just text each other. I think to paint them as the assholes means big leaps in logic. To be like, he could have been hurt. It's like, yeah, but he wasn't. Like you're starting to like really poke holes in this thing. I think I see when people are doing the like, because I agree, this is like a soft situation. This is a very relatable situation too of just like, look, the way this all shook out, Mark was hurt and felt that the situation happened differently than it actually happened. They didn't abandon him. They were in the theater. He was waiting for them to walk in, but they were already in. It just kind of was like, it's kind of a stupid situation. Yeah, because I have like a theater back and bright in my mind. And I'm like, it's kind of like hard to miss that. The cafe is not like a completely separate building, like a block down the road or something. Like, you like just poke your head in, look around. If you really want to know, ask. I don't know. I feel like there's so many other ways you could have gone about this. To read into it, it does feel like Mark has like some resentment there. Like maybe he has felt like he's outside of the group a little bit. And I can see feeling hurt that it's like, oh, I didn't show up and none of you texted me. That's probably more what he's heard about. They thought he no showed and they didn't even text him when he no showed. It's like, they're just like, how good of friends are we? We're getting into the territory of playing mind games though. And I think that's totally. I'm not a fan of that. Like just say what's on your mind. Yeah, absolutely. If they were younger and they were like 19 or something, maybe I'd understand. It's a bit. But 28. Yeah. Yeah. Having been that age, that shits in my control, man. Totally. All right, our next story. Am I the asshole for buying myself an Xbox when my boyfriend said he got me one for my birthday last year? Okay. I don't know how double Xbox is going to be bad. All right. Stack them. My boyfriend, who's 20 and I, 24 year old woman, have been dating for about a year and a half now. We're long distance and he's been out here to visit me about four times for weeks at a time. Last year on my birthday in June, he had told me he got me an Xbox. I was really excited because I've had mine since 2016. So we can assume that they had an Xbox one and was looking forward to an Xbox series X. We met for the first time last October. He didn't bring it with him that time. No big deal. He only had a small bag that time. Fast forward to December. He came out for Christmas. He bought a bigger bag and even asked if he could bring his PS5 so we could play games together. And I said, yes. After Christmas, he went home and I asked about the Xbox. Whenever I asked him, he got frustrated and said I was nagging him about it, but he'll just send it to me in the mail. A few weeks go by and nothing. So I asked him again and he gets really upset again. He said it was in a box under his bed and he didn't want to deal with it right now. It got to the point where I just said that it didn't matter whether or not he bought it. I just wanted to know. We got into a huge fight about it and I told him I wanted proof that he actually had it. He sent me a picture of the box. I was suspicious about it because he had mentioned to me before that his best friend had the same Xbox I wanted. So in my head, I was thinking that he had just taken a picture of his friend's old Xbox box. But I promised him I'd let it go after he sent the picture, so I didn't bring it up. That was sometime in January. My birthday is coming up again and we were on the phone and he was talking about things to get me. For his birthday, I had gotten him a game and a vinyl wrap for his PS5. So I had told him a wrap for the Xbox would be cool. My way of hinting that I wanted my Xbox. And he said no and that he'd think of something better. I promised him I wouldn't bring it up again, but it's been almost a year. He's coming out for my birthday, so I thought maybe he'd bring it. We were texting about my gift the other day and he had mentioned he needed to buy what he was getting me. So to me, it sounded like he wasn't bringing it. I've been wanting this Xbox for so long and I was sick of waiting so I went looking on eBay and bought one. It's coming this weekend, so I had to tell him. I told him not to be mad, but I bought myself an Xbox. I tried to explain my reasoning and that I didn't want to wait anymore because my Xbox now barely works. But he got so mad at me and just said that was a fucking waste of $500. So I offered to pay him back for it and he said he doesn't want my money. Now he's really upset with me and it has me questioning if it was messed up that I ended up buying the Xbox for myself. Am I the asshole? This dude does not have an Xbox. He doesn't have an Xbox. This is the funniest version of catfishing. Like he comes and visits her so he's not catfishing himself, but he's catfishing a whole other thing. An Xbox. Yeah, I've got an Xbox for you. I'm going to bring my bigger bag. Psych, nothing in it. Yeah, sorry, I couldn't bring the Xbox. You couldn't bring the Xbox to play games together on. You had to bring the PS5 to play games together on. Also, a scenario is like, oh, you bought one? Okay, well now we have two Xboxes, we can play games together. Yeah. Like that's such a win. Sorry man, it's been a year. Yeah. You can't buy someone a gift and be like, yeah, I'm holding onto it and a year goes by. Sorry, it's under the bed. I don't want to deal with it. Sorry, I just, I'm going to get it to you eventually. That or this guy has been playing some mad Xbox in his spare time. Yeah, he bought himself an Xbox. He was like, it's pretty sick. I'll turn it on just to see what it's like. Yeah. And he deepened Halo. He was like, well, I can't give it to her now. Absolutely. She's going to see that it has miles on it. That's so funny. That's absurd. Just being like so about that Xbox. And he's like, stop asking. So that's what the Xbox about the sun. Fuck. Doesn't matter. About the sun. Like what Xbox? I also want to hear your super cut of how many times you said Xbox in that story. I said it a lot. Almost as much as Muhammad Ali. The verdict is not the asshole. Comments, not the asshole. That Xbox doesn't exist. He just wanted brownie points without making the brownie. Also him getting mad over it every time is kind of a red flag. So I'm not one to say break up, but consider if he's worth this. Opie said, yeah, I was dreading telling him that I got it, but he's younger. So I figure that maybe he's got that mindset that he needs to get me expensive gifts to keep me. Even though I've made it clear that I don't need gifts like that. Not the asshole. Opie wrote, so I offered to pay him back for it. No, no, no, you are paying him back for what? For something you don't have, haven't seen? What the hell? He is lying. Why are you still with him? Someone said, not the asshole. He never bought it. He's a narcissist and wanted the attention of buying you a nice gift without actually buying it. That would be a deal breaker for me. Damn, people really jumped through the narcissist break up. That one was pretty quick. I'm like, no, he just sounds like a dumbass. Yeah, he sounds like a 20 year old dude. Yeah, 20 year old dumbass. Crazy is like after a year, if you lied about this Xbox and it's been a year, how have you not scrounged up like 500 bucks to make it happen? Like maybe it's like I said it and now maybe after a year I can finally do it. Like, also you've never been to his place? No. To see this Xbox? Or the chalk outline for the Xbox one? Yeah. It was right here. I would have like reverse image searched it to see if you like pulled the picture off Google or something. A simple like, man, I'm so sorry. I wanted to get you a nice thing. I didn't. I thought I get the money by then. I'm like, I don't have it. Yeah. Easy. No, so easy. Update. Yes! Third Xbox! A fifth Xbox has entered! Update. He ended up sending a long text this morning about how pissed he was and that it was stupid that I bought it for myself. Oh no. He was going to bring it. The only reason he didn't tell me was because it was supposed to be a surprise for my birthday. Wasn't it last year's birthday? Oh Shane, this is the bad kind of update, isn't it? He said he's pissed because he bought more accessories for the Xbox too. So he spent well over $600. But now that I bought one for myself, I should keep it. And he's not going to give me anything he got. I told him that he should have just sent it in the first place and it wouldn't have gotten to the point where I had to buy it myself. I also explained that I didn't need expensive gifts and that if he didn't get it for me and just wanted to impress me, he should have told me when I gave him the opportunity to come clean. He explained the reason everything was so expensive was because I liked gaming and Legos, which are expensive. So it wasn't to impress me. He apologized because he made me so upset about it for so long and that he didn't think about it because it was under his bed. I told him I felt like he never listened or cared about it because I had nagged him multiple times about sending it, but he somehow still forgot. He apologized for being lazy and making it seem like he didn't care about it, how he should have brought it in the first place, and that he was wrong for not doing that. I'm even more conflicted at this point. Maybe I should have just waited for my birthday, but it genuinely sounded like he wasn't going to bring it. Update number two. Oh my God. Yeah. It's falling. Now he's dead. Now he's for sure dead. I ended things with him today. I couldn't do it on the phone, so I did it over text. Everything he said proved that you were all right. He's trying to manipulate me back into the relationship, but I'm at my breaking point. Thank you for all your help on this. Wow. Damn. Jesus Christ. Yeah, after that first update, I was like, what are you conflicted on? Yeah, he sucks. Yeah. Like he was a bit of a douche, and then he double douche'd. Yeah. I love the idea that she got her own Xbox, and he got all these accessories. He's like, you can't have the accessories now. You bought your own. Give me the accessories. It's like you could still be like, oh, well, I got you these two cool controllers, but he's like, no, you don't get any of it now. This guy is in a burning building, and he's like, I'm fine. I can get out of this myself. Go play Xbox. One of your old kids who's just the worst manipulator ever. Yeah. Not doing it well. Yeah. God, I still am laughing at, yeah, I got you an Xbox, and then you just don't ever give it. I got it for your birthday next year. I'm laughing actually really hard at buying someone an Xbox One, and then waiting so long, waiting for the Xbox Series X to come out, like wait 20 years. Be like, oh, I finally got that Xbox for you. Three generations later. It's ancient. No. Yeah, and him saying, it's in a box under my bed. I just can't deal with it. Saying he forgot about it is ridiculous. It's so funny because he literally, she specified that he got a bigger suitcase, and then was like, let me bring my PS5. You have a bag that can fit a gaming console in it, and you choose to bring your PS5 instead of being like, you know what, I'll bring you the gift I got you. Maybe he was like, I'm trying to change her into a PS girlie. Like it's. So I got an Xbox, but I'll bring my PlayStation just to show you how sick it is. Well, you know the PlayStation has so many games for it. Nice. He explained the reason everything was so expensive was because I liked gaming and Legos, which are expensive, so it wasn't to impress me. Yeah, I still think it. You have expensive hobbies, but buy a game, not a console. Yeah, he was kind of manipulating it. I game, buy a cool Lego set. You can get some dope Lego sets for the Katie Bucks. I think that I think the DeLorean Lego sets like $100. Like to be fair, Lego is crazy expensive for what it is. It's expensive. Yeah, yeah. There's way, like you said, really good ones cheaper. Yeah, some solid $20 ones. There are. I'm a simple I'm a simple man. Made an Xbox out of Lego. Yeah, like here. That actually be sick. Turn it on her. Yeah, either way, good for her. She got out of that. She learned a lesson. Yeah, so and she has an Xbox now, which she never did before. True. It's true. Go play Stardew Valley or something. Yeah. Hey, go marry Leah. Yeah, nice. Hey, good reference. Good reference. Or go marry Harvey. Leah. Leah. Yeah. Man, sorry. Sorry. Sorry. There I'm not in on it. There's a Leah lover in here. Yeah, sorry. Anyone for Harvey in the room. Anyone for Harvey. Hey, Dush. All right, it's time for our final story. Whoa, sweet torus. Am I the asshole for connecting to the ear pod after my niece swallowed it to see if it would play in her stomach? This rule. That is so awesome. We're doing good now. That's so cool. Not the asshole. That's science. Was Galileo an asshole? Was Einstein an asshole? To Finchie. Newton, were they assholes? Muhammad Ali. Was Muhammad Ali an asshole? Babe Ruth. Look, it's in there already. We've got to try this out. You've got to do it. Was Oppenheimer an asshole? Yeah, probably. I don't know him. Okay. When my three-year-old niece swallowed my sister's left air pod, everyone started worrying right away. I was trying to lighten the situation, so I connected the air pod to my phone and put my ear on her stomach to check if I could hear it. Surprisingly, I actually did hear a little sound coming from inside her, which made the moment a bit funny for me. But the people around us didn't really find it amusing. They all looked at me like I wasn't taking things seriously at all. I was just trying to calm the mood, but instead I ended up being the only one laughing while everyone else was still stressing about the air pod inside her. Oh, man. Okay. That is kind of funny. And you got an answer. Yes. Okay. Scary situation. Of course. At least, I mean, I don't have a kid. At least they're not choking on it. At least it's here. As you can say, it made it inside. It made it there. So you can now go to the doctor and be like, how do we get this? Chack of Rollins playing in our... Yeah. I mean, like an air pod is pretty tiny. Like, I know obviously there could be complications and issues. I think this is objectively funny. I think the doctor would also... It is funny. To be clear, it's funny. I think the doctor would also be like, they're not showing any problems right now, so listening to it is like, what else are you going to do? Yeah. Yeah. The doctor's going to be like, look, I can... We can work on this, but you got to play like Phil Collins or something. Yeah. I understand the concern. We're following up the way down. Play the Tarzan soundtrack. Yeah, honestly, it's kind of meta. If you think about it, he's figuring out where it is, so they can better assess the situation. Exactly. It's like you said, made it play. Find my iPhone. Find my air pods. It's different if... I don't know if something like this passes through your system and then... I don't know if it will. If you need surgery, it's different. Like, that's scary. Yeah. But in the moment, I'm like, I feel like I would probably laugh at that. Oh, in the moment I would laugh, even no matter how serious it's about to get. Yeah, I'd be laughing. You couldn't get a chestnut that ate an air pod. It all comes back. I think it's funny, and yeah, it does serve some sort of purpose. The verdict is not the asshole. Good. So I guess apparently tech can contain small batteries that can injure organs and... Sure. So it could require endoscopy or surgery, which is what I assumed. I'm like, yeah. But even then, it's still just like, well, this is still the situation we're in. Like, take them to the doctor. I'm sure it's going to be okay. I feel like kids swallowing stuff is normal, but then again, I don't have a kid. I don't think people laugh in crazy scenarios anyway. I don't think they should come down on that person for laughing about it. Somebody's going to laugh. Yeah. I totally understand the medical concerns and having those concerns. I could understand being the parent and being like, that's their first thing that they're thinking about. And that doesn't change for me how funny it is. Absolutely. It's hilarious. I am also once again biased. You know, I drowned as a baby and my family makes jokes about it. Yeah. So, you know, people make jokes to like... Kids are not going to remember this. No. Traumatizing for everyone but the baby. Yeah. Did she read? She really did. Yeah, I think so. I was like, they had to perform CPR on me. Like four minutes or... Dude, I forget. It was heaven real. I don't know. I don't think they... We don't know like the exact amount of time because it was like crazy in the moment. You don't want the odds. But yeah, my family calls me Shane Bobber. What are we bobbing for? Comments, not the asshole. I get why everyone else was angry. You made a joke when they were all stressed and worried. On the other hand, this is 100% something me and my husband would do if our kid had swallowed an air pod. We would have figured out what to do to fix the issue. And then we would have done the test and had a laugh to lighten the mood. OP said, we had already called the hospital and they said an ambulance would be sent. So being that everyone was stressed and seeing it would rub off on her, I decided to be playful uncle she knows. Someone said it was not for laughs, it was for science, had to be done. Someone said, I'm a nurse and I would absolutely laugh at my balls off. Not the asshole. There are way more dangerous things to swallow by accident. Edit, y'all, I never said they shouldn't get help. Yes, it has a small battery in it and it needs to get out ASAP, but swallowing a loose battery without anything casing it is way, way, way more dangerous. Yeah. Someone said, get through the plastic first. Yeah. Someone said, never an air pod, but when the youngest nephew was a wee tot, he swallowed a ball bearing. The doctor said all we could do was wait for it to pass. So each night we had him lay on the floor and checked him with a metal detector. The kind for beach combing. He thought it was great fun to have that thing go beep, beep, beep over his middle. Nephew and I would have been thoroughly amused by his tummy making music. Added bonus, since your niece thought it was humorous, you're calming the patient, not the asshole. Someone said, peak uncle moment. Well played, sir. OP said, this moment is easily the best time of my life. Seeing her smile made everything worthwhile. Plus we shall always have this moment. Someone said, my dog swallowed my air pod and I did the same thing. I picked crazy train. Yeah, what song did he pick? That could make him asshole. Yeah, the song is what determines where he goes. Yeah. He said, dogs out. That's awesome. Incredible. I mean, if you call the hospital and the ambulance is on the way, it's like, what are you going to do? You can't do anything. It's a stressful situation. You're the uncle. You're going to make a dumb joke. You're never going to have that chance again. It's true. And everyone's wondered that. It's like, guys, can we throw up, you know, Backstreet Boys onto the baby? Yeah. You hold him up like a boombox? You just have the baby. Yeah, like a JBL speaker. Yeah. Can someone skip? Can we go next song? Yeah. I would get the kids like moves to see if it amplified. Guys, we've got LMFAO on the baby. That's the moment that it's like, ask the kid, like, what's your favorite song? And then the kid's like, it's coming for me. That's true. It's so fun. Oh my gosh. It's like, I must be grrr. That's awesome. I wonder what it felt like, it must feel like, because the like, it has like a vibration and stuff. Like K-pop demon hunters coming out. Guys, should I swallow an air pod? All right. All right. Toss us an air pod. Guys, if this video gets 200,000 likes, I'll swallow an air pod. Toss me an air pod. If you swallow an air pod, can I put on Jacksepticeye videos? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You guys can put on whatever you want. All the way. Until that thing comes out, you have my express permission to play whatever. Do you have me to ox? The ox is Trevor. Trevor's the ox. Doing room toning, you just hear a song. Hey, can somebody pause this song on my song? Guys, come on. Stop it. Sorry, belly noises to fall asleep. Well, that's all our stories. Remarkable. Yeah. Incredible. It's incredible to see where the sausage is made. I know, isn't it? This is so cool. Isn't it so simple? Like when you're sitting here, it's just so chill. Yeah. I've never been on this stage until today. And now we're just in a wee little corner. I know, it's very funny. Just imagine. It's very funny because behind these cameras is like the whole other like everything else that we do, our pit stuff. Like the try not to laugh set is right there. There's 30 other shows. Yeah, so much stuff. Bit cities right there. That's true. Yeah. Dude, the poop corner is right over there. Poop corner. We're Trevor Poops. Right, poop. It's just Trevor. Poop dick. Yeah. This is fun though. Thank you guys for having me. Of course, Sean. Thank you so much. Yeah. Of course. Pleasure. Lovely. Legendary. You're such a great guest. It's been so fun to have you on all the channels. I know we'll continue to have you. I'll be back. Multiple, multiple times. I'm not going for the Smigot. I'm going for most concurrent guest ever. Whoa. All right. Well, then we'll see you again soon. Yes. And we'll see you guys next Saturday. Bye. Bye. Get your pancakes out. Nice. Well, I hope they've eaten them by now. I'm in the kitchen with Charlie Bigum. So what have we got here, Charlie? My brand new pan-fried pad thai noodles. Noodles? But you're Mr Fish Pie Guy. Guilty. And what? Ovens, roulette roasting. The pan is king of noodling. Whether it's pad thai, yakisoba or laxa, finding that perfect texture is a bottomless noodle rabbit hole. But all I have to do is stir it in the pan for six minutes, right? Bingo. Try the new Charlie Bigums Asian Pan-Fry Noodles range, handmade in my kitchen. Pan-fried in yours.