Men Can Have Bangs

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Shop everyday cotton and all of my favorite bras and underwear at skims.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you. Select podcasts in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows. The next day. The next day. Are we recording the episode? See, that's what I'm saying. No, no, no, no, no. I have something that I thought about this morning. I was getting up. Was cleaning the meal off my pants because I had spilled a lot in my lap. Isn't it funny when you stand up, your lap disappears? Your bangs are out today. Oh, what do they look like? I refuse to record with my entire team in front of me, saying with their chest, they look fine. No, I think, you know, I... And then to see in clips posted to the entire internet that they did not in fact look fine. You know, I think you should brush your bangs back. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's perfect. I had my hair down in the cart today. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My jet of hair off. Let me just double check. That looks great. No, that looks great. No, that looks great. No, that looks great. No, you just put them back down. No, I just put a little wispies down. You don't like the wispies? No, it's not, there's a thicker... This part? Yeah, put that back. No, like you did before. Yeah, that's... I just feel like it gives it too much volume when I zoos you like that. No, you need your hair back off of your face so we can see your beautiful face. Oh my God. Okay. Thank you. No, no, no, it's good. It's just like, it's weird that I'll never be able to explore a world with bangs because like... You've tried. Unanimously like no one thinks they look good in it. It's just weird that like... Not, hey, listen man, not everyone is... But I know, but it's just weird that like, I see my face every single day, like I sit in the mirror, I know my face, I know the way it's shaved and I go, yeah, I like this, like this is fun. And like 100% not one person on the planet... You know why? Likes it. Because no one has an accurate understanding of how they look. Like you have a different understanding of the way you look that makes you think like, yeah, I'm gonna do these bangs and then everyone else can let you know, like no champ. That's just crazy. The conviction with which people are like, what are you doing? You know, it's not even like a hesitation. It's like, how dare you... Well, even just in general, like men don't wear their hair like that. Man, some men have bangs. Not like that. Not like that. What do you mean? You were doing like a thick zowie-dational bang. I was like, it was like a nice classy, like Ian Summerhalder bang. No, he has like Justin Bieber hair. You have curlier hair. It's pretty straight today. No. Watch. You know, is this giving Ian Summerhalder? I don't, it's not a match. It's not, yeah, that's different. How? That's going, I'm sorry. How is it different? That's different. I don't see how it's different at all. It just is. That's exactly... You know what, can I be honest? On the one hand, like, yeah, he can pull it off. On the other hand, he should push his hair back. Really? Yes. I don't think I've seen a man with bangs where I'm like, yeah, keep him. Keep your hair like that. We've gone over this. You've seen several men with bangs. No, that's a different thing. I think it was a soul patch we were looking into. It was a soul patch. Yeah. God, I can't do either. Yeah, no, he should, Timothy Chalamet should push his hair back in this photo. Yeah. I think Leonardo DiCaprio... Can I be... It's a little bit different when it... It's a little bit different. Why? Because he has straight hair. Oh, okay. Connor Story can do bangs. Because he's like, he's a different vibe. Okay. We can keep exploring. No, I just think that there needs to be a solution that everyone is on board with and it needs to include some bang for me. Sometimes when you have wisps... Wisps. That's fine. You can't do a full thick curl. Bob? Yeah, you're doing like micro bangs. Like micro bob? Yeah. You can't be doing that. I can't do that. Not a lot of people can do that. So you, like the wet look I could do, the wet look. No one said anything about a wet look. What do you mean wet look? I don't know. Maybe I get out of the water. Everyone's hair is different wet. Yeah. You can totally do a wet look. This is my hair wet wet. But... Is he calling in the troops? Do you know what I'm talking about? This may hear a little wet. This is my hair wet wet. Does Jack Martin have bangs? Jack Martin has had bangs. But he has that straight, silken hair, you know? He's also got... And he pushes it back. He could do anything he wants, obviously, with his... See, but he has like, he does wisps. He's not doing full blunt bob. Can you click on that second picture of him and the... Yeah, that's scary. It's just one of the... If I saw this photo on Shrooms, I would cry. They're identical. I mean, it would freak me out. It would scare me. That's... The outfit on the right is probably one of the biggest atrocities that has ever happened to mankind. I wonder... Listen, I love the guy. Me too. I wonder what he thinks about it looking back. He legitimately looks like, hey, we saw you from across the bar. We love to revive. And again, like this is an example of someone trying something. Yes. You can always do. I know, I know, I know. But what I'm excited about is that every time I've tried bangs, someone has stepped in because I have good relationships, good, healthy relationships. He has someone out to get him. And this. Maybe it looked different in person. I can't imagine it. I can't imagine. Anyway, what were you saying before I interrupted you? Oh, what an amazing callback. And what an amazing thing that I'm remembering what I was gonna say. I was just cleaning something off my lap earlier. And I'm sitting up, I'm going like this and I'm like, where's my lap when you stand up? Lap no longer exists when you're standing. Are you sure? This? Yeah. For those of you who aren't who aren't on the studio, the way that the Kelly Clarkson just breathed out a long exhaust inside when Connor stood up. It's so long. Like miserable. Okay. Yeah. I know. It's, you can look up the definition of lap. Lap can only exist while sitting. No. Lap generally does not exist when standing. Lap is defined as the horizontal surface formed between the knees and the waist of a person. Awesome. Yeah, sit on my, yeah, sit on my lap. Right. You couldn't sit on your lap. You can't sit on my front. Yeah. On my front piece. Nice, nice, nice, nice, nice. When you're standing, it is just your frontal. Yeah. Full frontal. So that's really just the only thing that I thought about this morning. And it's been a little bit crazy of a morning because I like hop on Twitter. There was a world when I used to hop on Twitter and like I'm like, oh, there's some fun stuff for Brooke and I to talk about. Today, will be known as potentially that are like, the podcast that comes out with the announcement of World War III, which is kind of fun because we just talked about my life, my bands. Are you starting up your manga early? I'm gonna get it out of the way. Okay. Yeah, but that's just like what everyone's kind of talking about right now. But everyone talks about that all the time. I know, it's a big day for the people that are. And I think that you've been engaging with that type of content, or it's like I'd be shocked if your Twitter page was anything but. There's some fun stuff like. I have an open Twitter in like months. Let me see what mine is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I'm telling you, like you're skewed. Yeah, I do get, I do get real. No offense, but this Ilya body count discourse is outing y'all as virgins because what do you mean you think his body count is 30? That's my first tweet. Ilya, I'm in the Ilya body count space, discourse space. Okay, mine is. Carpenter music video, Sydney Sweeney. Interesting. I can't decide if it's good. Sydney Sweeney, boob job conspiracy. Yeah. Who is this? Oh, this is Paul. Okay, I see. Yeah, I need to stop doing that, I guess. So I think maybe Twitter first thing in the morning is like before I've, I guess it is like reading the newspaper though. I can't decide if it's good for me or like really effing me up. I think effing. Yeah. Yeah, interesting. Yeah. Anyway, I wanted to show you this. I've total, I've, and I'm sorry that this is a visual component, but I have a total new ecosystem that I think like you would want. It's looking so fat. Well, because remember I told you like you can, you get these like leather things and you stick multiple notebooks in them. Yeah. So this is the my leather. Brooke. Portfolio thing that I made. The way. Look, wait, first of all, you need to close. Here it is closed. You have. Okay, check this out. 100% manifested in real life, the chocolate episode of SpongeBob where they're selling the bag within the bag. No. Yes, that's it. It's not the same thing. It's a journal within a holder, within a holder, within a bigger journal. Well, it's just a way to keep all of your journals connected because look, here's my one journal. You open it, just kidding. There's three in here. Kind of like when they unzips the big bag and there was a bunch of little bags of chocolate. As far as with the Hobonichi, here's this little pouch that I keep random shit in. Okay, this is my diary. Beauty. Now here's my dream journal. So I can keep them all in one spot. Cause weren't you saying you need to, cause you grabbed the wrong journal the other day. Yes. You would not grab the wrong journal if you just had both of them on hand to me. I know, you know that I'm gonna do this too. Get one of these. I'm gonna do this, yeah. Are you? Yeah. Okay. Cause I'm starting to hate my phone. I am, literally this has changed my life. Yeah. Like the way I'm writing in my journal so much because I like the way it looks and the way that I'm, I said I need to get another little journal to add something because I need more things. So right now I have a dream journal and now I'm saving random out shit like my CalCards. Yeah. I have only one dream in here that I can't share. It's not really politically correct. As your subconscious being it, cancelable. Yeah. I think I would get in trouble if I read this, but it's not my fault. It's not. It's the inner mechanisms of your. I don't know if, I don't know if this is, I can read it in the bonus. Like I'm not sure if this is, it's not my fault. Yeah. I mean, I had a dream last night which I know no one, no one could give one less of a shit about, but I was just like in my hotel room. And when I, I was like kind of lucid cause it's like Christmas Eve. Every time we record the podcast, I'm so excited to get here that like, I don't want to miss it. You know? So I'm like up kind of. And I'm like thinking about what we could talk about. And then I kind of go to sleep and I come to I'm lucid. And I'm in my hotel room, but it was my like our game room in my parents house. And I looked to my left and my dog who's now passed away is there in my dream. And so I go speak to him cause he's laying in kind of a weird, weird way. Did your dog ever die? Yeah. Yeah. Saki? Yeah. Saki died. Did you tell us? I don't know. I think you just let it go. Yeah. He passed on. You never said a word. Oh yeah. I'm sorry. Was that like a year ago at this point? Not quite. Did him and Max ever overlap? No. I must remember him dying. He must have said something. I don't think so because I had gone home and I knew that it was probably the last. I think, yeah. Of the Mohicans. That's a movie. I don't know why that just came to mind. And one of our last comings and goings and I filmed on Snapchat of all places. That sucks. My last memory with my family dog that I've had for my whole life is on Snapchat. And it keeps popping up like seven years ago today. You had some awesome cuddles. And it's like the last time with my family dog. He did not die seven years ago. It will pop. I mean like when I'm 58 years old and I get my seven years ago today and it's my family dog and I'm on Snapchat. They get my memories. Yeah. So he's now passed. I'm sorry. But in the dream, very much alive. To my chagrin, I walk up to him and I say something to him. I don't really recall what I say. He responds in Japanese. And it's a man's deep Japanese voice. And I look closer. Sorry, I died. Broke like full blown, but it was in Japanese. So I didn't know. And then I look closer. His, oh my God. I know why it happened. It's his butt. And his butt is a Japanese man's face. Fair skinned speaking to me. And then I shake him and his head turns. And now the Japanese man has gone off his butt. It's like Professor Quarrow and Voldemort. Completely. But you know why that happened? Why? Because over the weekend I was talking to someone about one of the cartoons that I used to watch. And of course we're going through all of the horrors. Invaders in. Yeah. Kershka, the dog. Then I hit one that like really snuck through the radar. Cat dog. Cat dog. That's why 100% I had. That's why I had the dream about Socky's butt being an Asian man's face. You need to get a dream journal. Japanese man's face. I know that, well this is kind of my dream journal because I say everything here, but holy moly. Can I make you your journal? Yeah, I would love that. I will then, I will then moe. I would love to do that for you. I would love to do that for you. That would be amazing. It would be fun to have two sex here. I'm gonna, the next episode, oh no, I can't do the next episode because that's like tomorrow. Oh my God. Here's what, maybe if I can get my shit together, I'll give it to you at the live show tomorrow. How would you do that before tomorrow? I would have to be really motivated. We can see it, we can check back in. Because now they have this type of stuff at like Barnes & Noble. Do they? Yeah. Wow. Not, not at my Barnes, they don't have like a good leather situation, but I can try and find something. Oh, how fabulous, that's so exciting for me. Yeah, I think that'll be fabulous. Yeah. That would be nice to actually get my pen to paper. Should I tell you what I'm gonna do, or do you just wanna be surprised? I kinda wanna be surprised. Unless you really wanna tell me what you're gonna do. I'm gonna include three little notebooks in it. Okay. Oh my God, no, I'm gonna, I'm gonna literally blow your shit up. I can't wait. Oh, I can't wait, thank you. Yeah, you're welcome, I'm really excited. I'm really excited. Cause this is now like, I don't know if you saw it click for me today. This just, this made you click? Click. Yeah, cause yesterday I was writing a lie yesterday and I was like, there is absolutely no value to my notepad on my phone. Like I don't feel any drawn towards it in any way. It doesn't inspire me, it makes me, I have to unlock my phone. It doesn't feel good, you know? I'm thinking, like my brain is firing at rapid speed figuring out what your sections are gonna be. Oh, how exciting. It's gonna be so hot. I love that, so hot. I do too. Why do I love that? I'm aligned, we're aligned. Hey guys, we want to thank a sponsor of today's episode of 1-800-Flowers. Oh my gosh, think about the mom and the moms in your life. Mother's Day is around the corner, I've just found out it's May 9th or 10th. It's coming up though. Think about what they've done for you, these mother figures in your life. 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Rakuten is a world of rewards. Join today for free. Go to rakuten.com or get the app. That's R-A-K-U-T-E-N. Okay, well I have something else. All right, go, give it to me. Well this is also, this was also low key kind of included in my dread section, but it's technically not dread. Like I think a lot of people are very excited that we just went to the moon again. And it's the farthest away we've ever been. Can you think about this number for a second? Without vomiting? 255,000 miles from Earth. I have, I genuinely cannot conceptualize numbers. To me, like I don't see the difference in my head between 255,000 and 255 million. When's bigger? No, obviously when's bigger, but like it doesn't, it doesn't, I can't see that. You know how I think of space? Like a bay in the ocean. Like all of, like the moon is low key, like our little boat. You should watch Project Hail Mary. Did you watch it? Well, because I need to read the book first, but like I think my understanding of it is that it's like a really wholesome story and it might reclaim the way you feel about space. I used to not even mind space, but now I'm just like shaking, crying, throwing up, thinking about it, being out there. And it's like crazy that we just all go day to day being like, yeah, of course. What did that, did we like of like, they bred that out of us? We're just like not, we're not thinking about it. That's crazy that we're all just like, time to clock in it. JP Morgan, you know, it's like, not to be like the dude that's like, we're all floating on a big giant rock and we're so small and nothing really matters. Space really doesn't bother me. I have two quick things. Our e-space, one. The Mariana trench bothers me. I've been to Mariana, Mariana's. You haven't been down. No, down, down, down. You haven't been to the bottom. I haven't been to the bottom of Mariana's trench. I've been on top of her. That's fine. Yeah. In Guam. In Guam, off of Guam. Yeah, off of Guam. Yeah, off of Guam. Yeah, off of Guam. No, yes, see. Yeah. It was lovely. And I do remember that's probably my first memory, which we talk about memories all the time. That's probably my first memory is I remember the glass bottom boat. Yeah, wow. I wanna go on a boat. The GBB. I would be throwing up, I mean, every five seconds. That's all I remember. There's a couple fish and stuff. One thing I was gonna say about them going to around the moon type shit is the toilet broke. Ooh. I guess I never thought about going to the bathroom in space. They all had to, they all had to wear diapers. Yeah, which is such a bummer. Like we need to provide better for our astronauts. If we can't get the bath. Wait, so do they just dispose of it in orbit? See, this is the part that like makes me, the idea of them throwing their dirty diapers just like out into the void is just very crazy to me. Are they? It was a clever solution to mostly work with fecal use. Maybe I had more astronauts reported a faint burning smell coming from the hygiene bay, heating insulation, P-receptical. Okay, but are they putting everything into the orbit? We're just skimming through this. Vent line used to dump P into space. Nice. Okay. I just like, imagine you're on a road trip, okay? So you're going to Coachella, you're going out to Palm Springs, you're going out to the desert. Really gotta go. Really gotta go. There's nowhere to stop. Now I want you to take that and I want you to quadruple it by 255,000 miles. And then I want you to think about, if you fit type around then you could just go. You have no problem with that? Obviously it's not ideal. I wonder if I could, because I remember when I was little and I wanted attention and I was like, I'm going to pee in my pants for attention right now. And I couldn't. Like it just like, it doesn't, my body wouldn't let me. So I wonder if it would let me. I guess if it was an emergency because I've gone in my pants accidentally recently, not recently at all, but like more recently than I prefer. Only my 20s. Yeah. I don't think I could pee in my pants. That's what I'm trying to say. Yeah, just like in front of your coworkers, pooping your diaper. I think it was coming out, it's coming out. Of course. But I don't think I could just be like, I'm pooping now. And it's like the nannnnds. I think it would only happen if it was like an emergency slipping out at night. Hi, this is International Space Station. We are all pooping now. Hi. Anyway. I'm just kidding. If you're having to announce it like, oh, that's funny. That's funny. I feel like you, like it's more awkward if you don't. Is there smell in space? There is. I don't think gravity does anything to that. To smell? No, because smell is like, I think like floating particles. Do you know that if you, space has a distinct pungent smell cleaning other suits, that's where space, hot metal, seared steak, and welding fumes, and gunpowder, what is going on in space? God, you jinkies. Oh my God, like imagine a space candle and under it, it's like notes of hot metal, seared steak, welding fumes, and spent gunpowder. This is the Texas Roadhouse. Okay. And then to add on top of that, dirty diaper. Yeah. Dirty adult diaper, 250,000 miles away from the nearest bathroom diaper. It's not awesome. Oh my God. Things would start to really fade of importance. Like we are up in space, we're doing whatever they're doing to the moon. I don't really know what they're up to up there. Imagine just having a piece of it. Like I would be like, I don't, whatever, like take a picture, take a picture. Outer space scented candle. We should get one for this dude. Astronauts describe the smells of a mix of gunpowder. Oh yeah, I already know that. Raspberry's in rum. Oh, that sounds nice. Gunpowder, seared steak, raspberry's in rum. There's no way. That sounds good to me. Gunpowder and steak. Yeah, it's the same way like I like the smell of gas. But would you like it mixed with like raspberry's in gunpowder? I truly think that sounds like an awesome Yellowstone themed candle. There's the best smell to me is when you're driving into Ocean City, New Jersey and you're passing Egg Harbor and it just smells like egg beach eggs. That's my- Like sulfur? Yeah. So farts. Yeah, but it's like beach farts. So it's fine, cause it's like the source is, it's coming from the beach. Fart beach, the beach that makes you fart. Egg fart beach. Like that, I love that. That's so gross. Gunpowder said you like gasoline. So it's not that different. I'm pooping now. I want to talk about San Diego. Okay, can we touch on San Diego in one second? There was the that space thing and then there was, who cares? Yes, talk about San Diego. Well, we went, we had a live show in San Diego. We had our first live show. It was fabulous. Thank you all for coming to it. It was fabulous, it was fun. That was so fun. That theater was amazing. What a great first show. That does, thank you for coming. If you came to our OG first show, thank you for coming, like very sweet, very grateful for you. Like this felt like a real, real first show. It was great. But what I want to talk about is that was kind of really my first time in San Diego. Okay. I went to the zoo once before and then I also went when we evacuated for the fires, but like we didn't really leave the house. But this was like, I was in San Diego and I went to La Jolla the day after the show. This is my first time, shit, I meant to wear my La Jolla hat and t-shirt today. Dang, well luckily we're recording three times this week. I'll do it tomorrow, yeah, I'll do it tomorrow. But, oh, I'll wear it to the live show tomorrow. The people of Irmine might not love that. No, I know, that's true. Anyway, this is my first time hyperfixating on a town. Love that. You had projected that a little bit because you were so excited for your beach front town in Carmel, which is up north. But guess what? What? Well, first of all, what struck me about La Jolla was the wildlife. The seals and the water. The water is crystal clear blue like you're in a swimming pool and in Europe. The seals are just swimming about, living their best life. A squirrel gave me a high five. I felt like Jane Godall. Like so in touch with creatures. Yeah. I just felt like we are all one. And imagine, I'm walking away from the seals. I see someone holding a bag. Bookstore and stationery shop. I go to the bookstore and stationery shop, Warwick's. Heaven on earth. The only problem is that prevents me from being able to set up my bookstore in La Jolla because I don't want any bad blood. You never want to be the store that is the competition. The spiked store. You don't want to be the spiked store. So I would have to go to a different town. Or is it different enough when you're doing books, cats and a bunch of other, and a cafe as well? I think it's still not right because you're still selling books. It's healthy to have some level of, I just don't know if you're gonna find a town without a bookstore. I really don't know. Well, I think what I'm really saying, and is at the crux of this is I need to make my own town. I think that's really what it is. So I think I need to find an empty piece of land. On the coastline? Along the coastline. Oh yes, yes, yes. And then that's when I really start up the bookstore, the cafe, someone can do the local grocer. And it's literally just what a town needs and necessities all within a very small area. So technically it's, yes! But put a positive spin on that. A commune. By the way, I've told you before, I'm very on board with joining. Yeah, no, I know that. Yeah, so I think what I'm looking for is not to join a town, it's to be the town. Right. I think that's what I'm kind of figuring out. But anyway, I think I'm gonna move to La Jolla. Okay. While I figure my shit out. Yeah. I get that. I just, it was an amazing, I can't even get over it. I can't believe it's been two hours away this whole time. It is funny that way. California's just all of these different maps of. Why is the water so blue and it's so brown here? Different mayor? I don't think that's why. I don't know. It's just- There's just a lot of people here. It seems like it's a crazy difference. Like it's not even, it doesn't even seem like the same element. It is crazy, but you can literally just pull up Google Maps and do like worldview and you can see or like that. It is definitely the same ocean. Yeah. No, I'm saying like if you scroll up to Malibu or if you scroll south to like Manhattan Beach even, it's like blue, poop, blue. Yeah, Manhattan Beach. Manhattan. Manhattan Beach. Beach is even a lot bluer. But like it still doesn't even compare to La Jolla. I know, I don't know. Me neither. Different sand for sure. I'm not talking about the sand. Well, the sand makes it, yeah. La Jolla's water appears bluer and clearer to do its rocky canyon adjacent geography. It was the canyon and protected marine areas that reduce sediment and algae. Conversely, Santa Monica Beach water often appears greener and murkier due to shallow sandy bottoms. Hi, sandy bottoms. Oh. Yeah, I guess I get that. The human made sedimentation. I got in the water the other day and I was just like having the time, oh, it was like right before we went down to San Diego and I was swimming, I was gurgling. La, la, la, la. I was like, is that actually? Maybe I'm, hmm. Looks different than usual, get out. Dangerously high levels of bacteria do not swim. Every hole. I think you're fine. I really do. Okay. Imagine how much worse our ancestors had it. They didn't have signs, you know? Who knows where they were putting their bodies? They also died at like 32. That's true. So. That is true. And I think we might be making a couple more ounces of trash and garbage and poisonous. You know what I wanna see? I wanna see a chart that's like average lifespans and the time periods. We can probably LTE. It might scare me. Well today, oh my gosh, I have an incredible announcement for you. What? Today's the day that we all stop aging and no one else is born and no one dies. That's today. Yay. Yeah, how exciting, congrats. Yeah, happy day. I can show you more into that right after we look up the lifespans that are now irrelevant. Okay, so 1816. It's unfortunately in chart form, like bar graph and shit like that, which is hard for me right now. I don't know why there's so many lines. I feel like there could just be one. Just tell me. Average. Just tell me with words. This looks like an echocardiogram. From around 30? Middle ages. Well middle ages is of a wide range, 30 to 40 years. Frequent dips due to plague and famine. In the 1800s, it was still 30 to 40. 1900s to 1950s, rapid increases began. 45 to 48. Wait, why is it only 72 to 73 now? That's the average? Oh, I don't like that. Don't love that either. But good news is... I'm really in the mood for a medical advance. You know what would blow chunks? If like a massive like, you get to be frozen at like 30 type of advance came when we were like 92. Completely. No, I don't know. That's the golden years apparently. 92? Yeah, we just wouldn't be like fucking and sucking like we used to. I'm fine aging. Listen, I'm fine. I just don't want to my body to break down and decay. Totally. I think that that means we have to be proactive now with vitamins at center. I'm fine dying at 95 as long as I love, like my years, my 95 years are good and healthy and I have a body that is kind to me and I'm kind to my body. Your body? It's a wonderland. It's a wonderland. I do, I have that in my notes of like jokes and just as your body's a wonderland, I'm like, wonder what I thought was like... I feel like you've done it before. Like if you transcript search TMG, body is wonderland. Like I bet you'd find you doing that joke. I do test a lot of jokes here and the way that they don't... We know. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. They don't land here. And then I go and I do them for a while. So I'm like, man, they didn't work for a reason. Ha ha ha ha. Doesn't he remember the episode where they talked about? Wow. Oh my God, legume? Wait, we talked, I looked... Wow, that's real crazy. Like your mind, like it's amazing. Like it's like an amazing place. Your body's a wonderland. Whoa, I wiped my nose on the mic. They really did it well, the transcript. It really led us right to your body's a wonderland. Is that, I just straight up, just like your body's a wonderland? It just said your body's a wonderland. Oh, cat looks so different. Something in my cat's a blonde. Something in your mind. Like what? Your mind? Your mind? Like my teeth are masked. Your mind? Like it's amazing. Wow, like it's like an amazing place. Your body's a wonderland. You are what's continuing to wipe your nose with the mic. Is there anything else you wanna search? No. Okay. But yesterday I was watching basketball. I don't have shit going on right now. I was watching basketball. I do. You should have watched basketball yesterday with me. The NCAA. Michigan, congratulations. No, I had to finish Dury Duty, which by the way, you still haven't watched. Well, I'm excited to, well, I needed to be watching that at the same time with, with other people. Because now I know, well now I'm gonna end up seeing, what are you telling me? Like it really didn't turn me on too much the way that you were like, yeah, it's just not like the same. It's not at all the same. And I don't think they should continue. But the last episode was so bad, it was amazing. Okay. Like it's so bad that it's good. Okay. Does that make sense? Okay, yeah. Yo, you know what? We should have searched just now. Like it was something that we said again, and I kind of wanna like just stop talking about certain stuff. We talked about the undersea internet cables that you brought up and then Iran threatened to cut them like the week after. Iran's dead ass about to cut the cord. And like, who is listening to this podcast? This is what I'm wondering. Is it just that we're discovering things that like people already know about and are already talking about? And it's like obvious and we're just discovering them because they're now in the zeitgeist. Or are people listening to us? There's no telling the actual breath of our viewership. Like I don't really know. Iran has threatened to cut the undersea cables in the Persian Gulf that provided global internet connectivity. Oh, we have to do something. Cause it's all I have right now to get me through the days is to fear monger and doom scroll. Honestly. I need to finish my book, my horrible, horrible book. If someone cut the cord and I did not have access to the internet and the world didn't have access to the internet for like a while until we got the cords repaired, it could be another classic example of like something horrible happening and it kind of ending up being. For the greater good. Everyone COVID happened and it was obviously horrible but then everyone started going on walks and it was kind of beautiful. It could be another one of those things. Brooke, kiss your brain. Well said, like way to think beyond where I put us into a fear mongering corner and you said, hold my hand, I'm going to take you out of this place. Yeah, it could be a classic example of the light in the dark. 100% except I do think that we have reached a place where that would be catastrophic type of shit. I'm not saying it wouldn't be catastrophic. Like I mean, you're saying like, imagine we just like can't get on Instagram. I think it's more like, like world like like economies would crumble and things. Connor and I'm agreeing with you the same way that COVID like was also that bad. Like really a bad thing. You gotta look for that sliver of light. I eat people going on walks. They cut the cables for the global internet supply. People might start to think about going on walks again. Yeah. This ad placement is paid for by Bath & Body Works. The luxury sense and real benefits will take care of your home's wellbeing so you can take care of yours. The Bath & Body Works white barn neutrals collection just makes your space feel really calm and put together without doing too much. I have one of my hotel room that I brought from the studio and it is making my room feel like my room, if you know you know. The cents are just super clean. They're cozy, they're comfortable, the cents are just super clean. They're cozy and everything looks cute, but it's still minimal. It's one of those things where you light a candle and suddenly your whole space just feels better, like the Feng Shui or whatever. My favorite is probably the pistachio milk and honey. That's what I have in my hotel room. Oh Connor, I like that one too. But my favorite is the mahogany coconut. Wait, I like that one. It's a little more warm and woodsy. So it makes my place feel calmer but still elevated. It kind of gives that clean put together vibe without being super sweet, which I like. The way your place smells actually makes such a difference in how it feels day to day. And this one just makes everything feel calmer and a little more put together without trying too. For sure. Bath and Body Works candles not only smell amazing, but they're crafted with premium lead free wicks for a clean safe burn. Shop the White Barn Nuddles Collection now at bathandbodyworks.com. Hey guys. We want to take a break to thank a sponsor of today's episode, Warby Parker. Buying glasses used to feel way more complicated than it needed to be and somehow always overpriced too. It's hard to know what's actually gonna look good on your face and a lot of the options just feel outdated. That's why I've been loving Warby Parker. They make the whole process so much easier. Yeah, they do. They have a virtual try on that's actually so impressive. You can see the frames on your face right from your phone and it's genuinely accurate. I tried on a bunch of styles and could actually tell what worked before ordering. The ones I always wear on here, the frames are Warby Parker and also so are the lenses. They're just really good quality. I've gotten so many compliments on them in the comment section that I read all the time and they just feel a lot more elevated than other glasses that I've had. Yeah. I've had a lot. Also the price point is a huge plus. Their prescription glasses start at $95. So you're getting something stylish and well made without spending a ton. They also have everything. Contacts, you know my contacts are, I got them from Warby. That was shocking to me. I didn't, everything. Well it's not like Warby like brand but it's like they get you the contacts because the eye exam that they do. Once I shop, it's pretty brilliant. Yeah, exactly. It's incredible. Contacts, sunglasses, even online eye exams. It's all in one place, which makes it really convenient. And if you ever want to shop in person, they have over 300 retail stores across the US. I've been to about 299 of them. Right now buy one prescription pair and get 20% off any additional prescription pairs at warbyparker.com slash bnc. That's 20% off additional prescription pairs when you go to warbyparker.com slash bnc. Okay, I like that. Is what I'm saying. Yeah, I do like that. I think that like planes would low key like fall out of the sky, but what do I know? I was, you know what I was? Plains wouldn't fall. Izzy, would you mind googling, will planes fall out of the sky and you cut the, what are those called? Internet. If my wifi goes out, will the plane fall? No, people flew planes without wifi for a long time. It's easy to forget that. No, cutting on a water cable will not cause planes fall out of the sky. You're fear mongering. It's just where your head goes. We've got to turn that, you know what I think will help you with journaling. You know what, it'd be crazy if like Google pulled up a clip of art as a source of like a question that we typed in, it was like, no, according to. According to our omega podcast in 2026. Plains will not be falling out of the sky today. Okay, here's what happened. There was a really, no. Significant disruptions to internet banking, communications and digital services occur, affecting national economies. Boom, kiss my brain. Plains are capable of navigation and safe landing without internet connectivity because I think they have radios. There was a really scary episode of criminal minds where there was, I guess it was terrorism, but this terrorist was targeting like individual commercial planes. One by one and just hacking the mainframe of the planes. That's not even, okay. Cause I don't know again, we don't know who's listening. Well, it's an episode of criminal minds, it's already out. Oh. It's been out for years. I hope that that is not possible. I'm just saying that was like to me, like scarier than serial killers. It was scarier than serial killers. So. Serial killers? It's crazy. Yeah, so anyway, I think I spelled cord wrong. I wrote in my notes, Iran cutting the cord, but I spelled it C-H-O-R-D, like the musical cord. But is that, that's not how you spell this. I think you just see it is got the H. Yeah. So this is like, yeah. So I spelled it wrong. That which is it goes to show you like, that's a great reason like I shouldn't be talking about this if I can't spell cord. I don't know. I think you can have a general grasp on something without being able to spell. I don't know. Can I be negative again? And then I'm gonna snap out of it. I'm gonna snap out of it. Cause I think I'm usually pretty positive about in the general way. I don't agree. Really? Yeah. Just recently I've been pretty negative. And it's cause I'm projecting from a personal space. Okay. But, you know when we were all going on walks and playing Pokemon Go and stuff and everyone was like, look how our phones are like getting us outside. The company was storing all the data from us playing Pokemon Go to like train AI to, or to create models for like Waymouse to be able to drive on the streets. Cause we were like filming streets and landmarks. Oh really? Yeah. Like you see people do that now, like set up cameras and like get like Google Earth photos. Like we were doing that for them. Oh cool. At least it was fun. I fucked with Pokemon Go. I know you did. So heavily that it like got in the way of living my life. I know. Like I would just, I lived, cause this was, I was still living at home and I lived by a train station. I mean, I would wake up in the middle of the night like 3 a.m. check Pokemon Go. There would be an extremely rare creature at the train station. I would sprint in my booty shorts and slippers to the train station. Dangerous, dangerous thing to do. But I got that. I got a bull. I got a bull. I catch them all. Yeah. For sure. And then I took my, I got my phone jailbroken. To access the rare Tamagotchi that you could only, not Tamagotchi. Pokemon. The rare Pokemon that you could only get in Japan. So I was able to go to Japan via my Pokemon Go in my bedroom. Yeah. I took it extremely seriously. Women in STEM. Yay. There's a Super Mario movie that I'm gonna go see by the way. Apparently it's good. Of course it is. I love Jack Black. Me too. Oh, did you watch SNL? No, did you? I watched him, I watched the Five Timers Clubs. I watched the Clubs. Yeah. I'm a big clip girl. I love clips. I love clips. My dad just said that he just, he's watching a show right now that Will Arnett's in. Like a newer. Oh, and you just start watching GTF. Yeah. I actually kind of dropped the ball because I've been only able to access Netflix. No, I've been watching St. Dennis Medical. I know. It is so genuinely good. For real? I'm being so genuine. So many shows are trying to be the office and it's not landing. But this show is also trying to be the office and it's landing a little bit more. Because they look at the camera longer or what? I don't know what it is. The acting is good. Exactly about this. I think it's just genuinely good writing. That's it. And the main woman is so funny. Wendy something, shoes and bridesmaid. Reno 911. Yeah, that woman. Oh, did we speak about this already? Now it's all coming back to me now, Celine Dion. Yeah. And now it's on Netflix. Yeah, I do want to start watching because I feel like I could use something light. It's light and funny and you can be on your phone. I could be on my phone getting scared while I watch something light and funny. Yeah. So your bangs fell down. Gosh. But it's fine. You know what? You would look good in one of those headbands. Like where I fell in the doll? Yes. I have one. You should do that. Really? Yeah, I think you look good in that. Like day to day? Yeah. Or you should try it for the live show tomorrow. Wear a headband for the live show tomorrow? Yeah. I'd be worried what people would say about me. This guy's in a headband. Be honest about what's going on in your experimenting. As long as you're honest and there's clear communication, no one's going to be talking about it. As long as you talk about it first, that's what I've learned. Get ahead of it. Yeah, I know what you're thinking. Is he in a headband? Yes, I'm trying new things with my body. So then obviously no one's going to be like, Connor being a freak in a headband. You already took care of it. I know. I wasn't being a freak either. I was just trying something. I want to talk about the drama because I saw it. You can talk about it. I don't know if I'll get my butt up to go see it. You have got to see the drama. One of the, I think it's the best movie I've seen in 2026. Okay, I'll go see it. I did not want to, I didn't even think about like my phone for the entire movie. Usually like even if a movie is good towards the end, I'm like, all right, let's wrap this up. Like I'm ready to play Fruit Merge or something. Not once did I think that during this film. In fact, I was like, I hope it goes longer. How long was it? Perfect length. It was like 145 or something. Well done. It was so good and so unique and really, really made you think. And I know it's being marketed as like, there's this big twist. I don't, I didn't really align with that. It didn't feel like there was like a huge twist. It just felt like, oh, this is the plot, this is the plot point in the film. It's like not necessarily like where you're expecting the film to go. But when people were like, oh, there's this huge twist. I thought it was gonna be like, it's all a movie or it's all a dream, not a movie or like a movie within a movie, like something like Black Mirror-y. But it's just like the plot goes in a direction that you might not. Okay, I'll watch it. It's really, really good. Can I watch it? I'll watch it before we record again. Yeah. Maybe not before we record again. We will probably, we will record again tomorrow in the next day and the next day. Not tomorrow. That's tomorrow. But we'll see each other. But it was fabulous, phenomenal. My friend Rob just absolutely knocked it out of the park. Zendaya incredible. Alana Heim was really good. Yeah, she's a big part. Wow. She played probably one of the most unlikeable characters ever. I'm so dumb that when I see someone play an unlikable character, I genuinely don't, I can't wrap my head around enjoying their personality. It's good acting. Yeah. That is good acting. I think that will happen to you with her, but she's amazing in real life. I just, she was on something recently. She had, she was in one battle after another, right? I never saw that, but I think she was. That was one that threw me around in circles. And loop vibes. But I like that. I don't think so. Yeah, she was in one battle after another. Yeah, she's really acting a lot. I think I've got to go for her. Yeah. The drama was fabulosity squared. Zendaya is in, so think about this. The drama, which I don't know how it's doing in theaters. I think really good. Okay, so the drama, Dune, she's in a Marvel movie this year. And I think she's in two more. What Marvel movie? Spider-Man? Yeah, I think, is it Spider-Man? I think there's another Spider-Man this year. She's gonna make, like, genuinely, genuinely, genuinely, genuinely low, so half a billion dollars this year. She's in Spider-Man. Oh, it's absolutely coming out in July. That's coming out in 2026. Yeah, I mean, she's not sharp for cash. How do you do five movies in a year? Well, they're probably all filmed in different times and even different years. Yeah, but even just press. I mean, I would be completely drained. Okay. But I think, like, a lot of it is, like, and I'm talking out of my ass as I'm not an actor, but I'm sure there are a lot of years where it's like you're not doing any press and you're just filming, and then there are years when you're just doing press and you're not filming, you know? Yeah. And then it's kind of just like, that's your job. Zendaya is disappearing from the public eye after four movies in 2026. Hope you don't get sick. I couldn't. We couldn't. We couldn't. She's probably in the early stages of being pregnant and she will come back when she's totally. What? So glad I read that. I can never be sick of Zendaya breath taking beauty and style, I agree. Timeless. Self-awareness. That person's like, yeah, we were getting to. Do you think she would like you? I was just thinking if she would like me. I don't know what that. Yeah, because I think that if she squinted and maybe if she was underwater. Oh, I forgot. I was underwater as well. Maybe she'd be like, is that my fiance? Is that my lover? Yeah. Yeah, they're married. Yeah. My husband. Yeah. But I'm talking about like imagine you to bag over your head. Would she like your personality? I think so. I have a handful of people that genuinely with their chest don't like me and I think I'm pretty aware of it. Yeah. And I stand with them. But I think in general, like if it was just a. You're likable. Yeah, I think that we could have a good, we could have some good chat. Izzy, would you mind looking up Tom Holland bangs? Let's see if he ever tried it. I think my bangs look more like Zendaya's here. Tom Holland bangs. Oh. Oh, is that what you're going for? That is what you're going for, isn't it? Is that what I look like? Well, his hair is wet. Remember? A wet look. We're talking about that. He's doing wet look. Oh, here, but he's like so young there. Yeah, I guess what makes you look young when you do it. Because he looks young. I don't mind looking a little young. No, but young like 13, not like 25. Gotcha. Well, he does usually push his hair back. So you look at him with those microbes. He's looking very British in that. Okay. Gotcha. I see. Okay, so my self-awareness personally for me is low. I think I look really great and very cool with bangs, but like, I guess maybe I don't know. Can you look, is he, can you look up Connor Wood bangs? Please don't. Let's see. Let's see if there is anything. Hi. That's good. That's no good. That's bad. It looks like my hairline is receding. So is her wisps. It looks like, hmm. Oh, yes. Connor Wood steps into the red carpet. Oh, wait. That was this wig. Okay. Okay. That was this wig. Okay, okay, okay. Okay. Oh, look at you as a little kid. Bottom. See, that's fine to do when you're little. That is crazy. The opaque-ness of my bangs. I saw this TikTok and I've never resonated with anything more in my life. That looks like- That was like, why is the word opaque the most translucent word? I like- You can see through the word opaque, which is why it's always tripped me up and I didn't realize it until someone said that. Okay, I completely- Opaque to me means see through. I saw that and I completely disagree with you 100%. Opaque to me is like hard block. No. Opaque to me, it's like bubble letters. Like it's bubble, but like bubble buddy, like bubbles. Opaque is just a bubble. Opaque, the letters are bubble letters that are just made out of bubbles. Opaque to me is- No, opaque to me is this water bottle. But then you think of the word transparent. And well, first of all, translucent, 100%. That's like jellyfish. Yeah. That's giving jellyfish. Transparent is more like- Window? Slime. Oh. That's what I'm seeing slime. I love slime. And then opaque is like water to me. Like opaque is the most, is more see through than translucent. Opaque is a wall. In terms of words that I'm seeing in my head. We need to get this young man off of my FYP. Look how much, look at the picture next to you. Like you, like look, you have not aged. Like it's amazing in a good way. Like you're like, imagine when you're 50, you're still gonna look young. Is that a little bit AI? No, that's, wait. That's actually completely artificial. Well, because the background is not that color in that picture. What is Favicon? Let's find out who was Conor Wood. Energizing lifestyle content with humor, brand power and cultural relevance. Conor Wood is a US based content creator for his comedic skits. Okay, this is just- He frequently collaborates with food and beverages. He's like Wendy's and Celsius. Integrating sponsorships and take casual humorous posts without breaking tone. Good job, Conor. Thank you so much. He also co-hosts a podcast that complements his digital presence with longer form conversations. 100%. I completely agree. Look, there's your fibs and friends. Yes. That's great. I love that outfit. Yes. His Instagram content includes random outfit pics, group photos with internet personalities and comedic captions that contrast heavily with the visuals. Very good job. His chaotic energy, you kind of transfer that into the structured conversations. He rarely uses traditional CTA language and said he relies on his personal brand to carry partnerships. Great. I don't wanna scroll down and see my growth in the last 30 days. It's gonna be zero. That's not bad. Wait, that's good. Why is it red? Why is plus red? Good job, Conor. Thank you guys. Oh, Conor's social media strategy. Wait, stop. Can we stop doing this? You have a lot of followers. You have more. No way. Oh, on TikTok? Yeah. Totally does. Oh my. I was gonna say about Dune while we're on the subge. You know Zendaya was just like, Rob was like, I wanna be in Dune and she was like, okay, one second. And she made one phone call and then he was just in Dune. Rob was in Dune. He's in the new Dune. We're gonna accept it. He's the new worm. He's so scary. He has my eyebrows. He's amazing. Wow. I don't know what Dune's about, sorry. I was assuming that's a breathing apparatus, but I don't know what they're up to. It just looks completely miserable. It looks like Burning Man if there was no music. It just looks so dumb. Not dumb, I know people really like it. I just like, I really tried to watch the first movie and I watched Where's Zendaya? Where's Zendaya? Where's Zendaya? Almost Googling. Apparently the second one was so good. I just didn't make it. I can't get into it. Did you guys all see it? I'm sorry, I just almost called it dumb. I don't think it's dumb. I'm dumb, I don't get it. Did you like it, Grace? Okay, Grace, I didn't like it either. You didn't like it? Second one? First one. Yeah, I think the first one is kind of, it's like giving like a guitar, where it's like you just have to watch the first one to kind of conceptualize the second one. I need to go get like completely my brain, like maybe my sides are switched. Like I think maybe my right side is supposed to be on my left side type shit. Cause I don't get like- Does that happen ever? I don't know. I know it happens with like your colon. You know what I learned recently? What? If you're unable to take anything seriously and you make jokes about everything, it's usually a common sign of frontal lobe damage. And I'm like, well, I've never hit my head very hard. And then someone was like, and the other sign of frontal lobe damage is you don't remember getting it. Someone would tell you, unless you were completely alone, which would be rare- Every time I- To suffer a traumatic brain injury, like completely alone and treated. It would have to be a traumatic brain injury. But I also, every time I hear the word alone, I think of Squidward with all those tiles in the void. Alone, alone. That's the worst. SpongeBob sometimes hit me like in a very panic attack space. In the book that I'm reading, that this woman is a race. So that means her soul can like hop from body to body to body. Good for her. And as a punishment for betraying her government, they took her soul out of its current body, locked it in a box, and threw it at the bottom of the ocean. You evil witch. Why did you tell me? And now it's, she's just gonna live it. Her soul is going to live in eternity, in a box at the bottom of the ocean. She's gonna go insane, for indefinite, forever, infinity. Is that not horrible? That like I almost can't think of anything worse. Right now she's in a box. I think they'll get her though, like, eventually. You- If someone puts my soul in a box. I'll let you know if they ever got find her. No, you need to legitimately come get me. I mean, imagine, Connor, like, she's at the equivalent of the bottom of the Mariana trends, she's with the cables. Okay. So I think that that sounds horrible, but truly that's exactly how I felt when I was doing that survey for money in college. You felt like you were in the box? I felt like I was at that bottom of the ocean, my soul was locked in a box, and we were arguing over vaginal meth, mesh. Not vaginal meth. Vaginal mesh. You were just talking about vaginal mesh? No, that was my call center job. When I was doing the survey. I didn't know it was about vaginal mesh. Yes, it was a mock trial, and they were seeing who was wrongfully, I think it was like wrongful. They fucked her shit up, basically. Like her vaginal mesh was like, like, distraught. Like, it's like, all over the place. It's like. Wait, what is vaginal mesh? Like if you, Like you're uterine lining? Like if you have some sort of. She got like an implant? Like some reconstruction. Yeah, she got reconstruction. They like grotesquely eff up. Like you have to get vaginal mesh to like, like to reform and things like to rebuild. Not you, sorry. That's what you're putting down. So everyone was like, I was like full blown like, fuck that. Like give this woman her money. You know, like, it's her. Why? So were you making calls on behalf of? No, I was sitting in a room with like 12 of, a jury of my own peers, which like is crazy. Cause I was like, this is jury duty. Full blown. Like you couldn't have put a more random group. There was a pregnant woman. There was like a full blown like crack ad. There was like, like an older gentleman. Like old, old, old bike, 150 something. They look like a tortoise or a ghost. And then like a middle aged like mom type that was like probably so. And we're like, the whole thing was like, we get to leave when we come to a consensus. Like some people were like, mm, no, I can't agree. It's we'd be like nine out of 10 people would agree. And I was like, literally, I like blew my lid at some point. And I'm in college. Yeah, I'm 19. I'm like, literally it doesn't matter. Like it doesn't matter. This is fake. And they came in the room. I didn't know they were watching us one way mirror type shit. You can't do that. I was like, okay, that makes sense. Yeah. How did it just, it was just like- So how did it end up? The woman got her money. Good, good. Like hypothetically though. Good, good, good. And I got my money too. It was $800. Two full days like of seven and a half hours in this room. My soul was trapped at the bottom of the ocean. Had to eat lunch with these folks. They took our phones the whole day. Not that I was like really doing anything. I think that I still probably had vine. So like I really didn't have anything to do. But still it was just like, wow, wow, wow. Like the first day was so horrible that I almost thought about, you didn't get paid per day. You got paid when you finished. I almost thought about not going back this second day. And my roommates were like, you're going back to pay rent. The call center was completely different. I've heard of that story so many times, but it's crazy that you just failed to mention it was all around vaginal men. The whole thing was orbiting around the mesh. So. Vaginally. It's crazy what you choose to admit. Vaginally, something like that can never happen again to me. I got that. Oh, I got that. I got a letter in a mail box. It didn't happen to be mine. I missed jury duty again, believe it or not. And this is my final warning. And then you go to jail? And I have to pay fine. But like I will go to jury duty this time. You could get a fun one. It's just hard because it's like I always put it off and I schedule it and I'm like, okay, I'll just schedule in a year and deal with it then. Then I either forget or something comes up. I got out of my last one because I was on the road for work. I was just doing shows somewhere. But I didn't even receive it. I went straight to my lawyer. Yeah, I just keep saying I haven't received it. Yeah. It's kind of, by the way, the ignorance is bliss. Thing does not work. I know. Like the, what is it called? Like pleading in it. Like you, or wait, ignorance? Yeah. Like it does not play. No, it's, it's, it should. So weird because I full blown forget all the time about physical mail. Like I'm like, if it's not a package, like email it to me. I'm all digital, like all of my stuff. I'm a digital girl living in a digital world. Try to, try to shoot me that in an email. Try and keep up. Try to keep up. All right, guys. We're gonna meet peace so bad. So. Okay, well I'll talk to you in the bonus. For sure. All right. And we'll talk to you guys there. I'll talk to you tomorrow and the next day and the next day of an XA. I'll see you every day this week. Hey. TMGstudios.tv slash BNC. Thank you. For bonus. If you wanna come listen to the bonus. We haven't said that in a while. That's true. TMGstudios.tv slash BNC. MAP. For bonus. It should pop up. Okay, thank you guys. Thank you. We'll see you at the live shows if you come and West Philadelphia. We're not going there. We are going to Irvine tomorrow and then, well, yesterday and then we're gonna be in Sacramento on Saturday. Thank you. See ya.