#629 - The Pursuit

We got a bunch of vibey hats now on the site on the website here. If you're looking for them, we get that two-tone gang, gang, gang hat, that orange camo, that all mesh, that classic duck camo, rope hat, that bone camo, that femur-fitty boy, that's what's up. And that nautical rope hat, if you want to get a hat, which is just a little apartment for your head, go on there. GovonStore.com. And if you don't need a hat, don't even worry about it. And thank you guys so much. Happy holidays. Lord, I got some things I need to say. Lord, I got some things I need to say. The stuzz, man, everybody saw that beautiful. They had a lesbian lady, and it was kind of a little chocolatey lesbian out there. And she was helping people get to heaven. She is that willy-wonka. She's that kind of lesbian willy-wonka. And she's helping people get to heaven, baby praise God. I loved seeing that. If you play it up a little bit, if we can show that. Lord, I got some things I need to say. Lord, I got some things I need to say. The stuzz, you can't win. You can't win. Okay, a truck went by right there. That's nothing to win. No, you can win. No, look. Hey, bro. I wish you there. That's what's up, baby. And that's what's beautiful about the world. That's beautiful. Look at that. Lesbians helping people get to heaven. That's where we are. So lesbian heaven, baby, that's what it is. A thug holiday. It's December 2025. And I'm grateful to sit here with you today and to have a moment of each other's time. I really am. Yeah, back in the day, a lesbian were lesbian allowed to help people get to heaven. I would say no. You would see lesbians high five in each other. You would see lesbians. They were untickledible. That was a thing you could tell if you tickled a woman and they didn't, and they didn't laugh. But they had just gotten like a fade, a boozy fade. These were kind of giveaways at the time, but now things are different. Yeah, just, yeah, it just feels like there's things you want to yell at the heavens. And Alex found on that, I'll get into that a little bit. We're going to get to you. Some of you guys just call. I'm happy to have this time. And yeah, I know people, congratulations to anybody who's coming off like a sober October. I know, I know there's that. There's no nut, November, 40 fart March. If anybody did that this year, which is pretty fun. People don't do it much, but it's, you know, trying to fart just 40 times in March. And nighttime doesn't count. Night time doesn't count. So yeah, that's, you don't tally those. But what else? There's, you know, November where you don't shave or whatever for HIV or whatever. There's what 11 shit June is another one. If you've never, you want to make your own V hit. Nah, baby, try an 11 shit, Jim. Try an 11 shit, Jim. And do not try, do not try it. This is not advice. We're just saying these are things people do. I'm not telling anybody to go do it. Now if you do do an 11 SJ and you do duties in the middle of the night, that counts. If you're, you know, if you're night shit and or whatever, that counts, those count. But yeah, people are challenging themselves in the world, you know, so it's good to know that we are still out there challenging ourselves. As humans, as humans that exist. So congratulations to anybody that's going through, that's been through any of those things this year. And you start to, you start to wonder, you start to wonder like why, why does it feel like maybe our country is like we're losing or falling behind or as humans that we might be overtaken by robots. And then you realize, oh, I know why because we're doing an 11 shit June, like we're doing no nut, November, you know, that's what we're focusing on. Or like a 2000 step, September, you know, some people did, I know 2000 step, September. And that's kind of crazy. We only do 2000 steps in that month. That's pretty cool. There's different ones out there. I'd love to know more than if you know some, drop those off in the hotline, 985, 664, 950, 3. Let me know some of the challenges that you and your friends have been putting yourselves through over time. But yeah, happy to be alive here still in America. And one thing that I learned this year that I thought was interesting or that I listened about was Ken Burns when he came on. And he was talking about the Declaration of Independence. He was talking about the American Revolution. And he said that like the Declaration of Independence was, it's just a little, it's like, it's not, it's definitive, but only as long as it's taken care of, right? It's like, it's not guaranteed throughout time that there's going to be an America or that these are the laws and the ways that things are going to be. So yeah, it's like I think I just always thought that America was guaranteed. That's what I thought. I thought, oh, well, America, yeah, it's guaranteed, right? This will always be here. Whether we say it's good things are good in America or things are bad in America, that it will always be there. And then you start to realize, well, that's not the truth. There's nothing that says America has to be there forever. You know, as much as it would be hard for us to conceptualize it, that's that America disappearing or being taken over or renamed basically, like, or having a merger is far fetched. It's not, it's not impossible because it's not a guaranteed thing, right? The Declaration of Independence, it's a, it's a hopeful letter to the future. It's a, it's almost like we look at the Declaration of Independence more like a receipt than like a, like a worksheet. That's what I think of or just as America that way. And I'm not trying to get real high, bro. Like I know that like, this is how we need to be or anything like that. I'm just, I'm kind of thinking of just how I have taken it for granted, just how it's like, this thing won't always be here unless we protect it. Now, what gets scary is when the America that we believe is one way starts to change. And then you're like, well, what am I protecting? And I think that's also some of the place where we are right now. But yeah, I just was like, yeah, I've always kind of just assumed America would be here that it would be this steadfast thing. But that's not the truth. It's, you know, throughout time, places have changed and they've been overtaken and they've had different rulers from different places come in. I'm sure there's been a lot of places have been sold out from under their feet. So I don't know, just thinking about that, not trying to get into like a negative space about it. It's like that having an America is an active thing. It's not a passive thing. And that's scary. And then also though it's exciting because there is some challenge like, okay, how do I contribute instead of just assume? So those are just some stuff I'm thinking about. And yeah, I've had a tough time like keeping some of my thoughts organized recently. And so I'm just doing my best. What else have I been thinking about? I've been thinking about like how much, you know, the person I would like to be in the person that I am and the distance between those two. And how much do I really want to be the best version of myself? I think I want to, but I guess how much work do I want to put in? Here I am with all this gift of just being alive, right? Of being alive, of being able to like exist in the universe. I can smell things. If somebody's cooking muffins, I can smell it. I can make macaroni. I can't go for a walk. I can look at my neighbor. Yeah, there's all these little things you can do for that are like make you alive. And then it's like, yes, I just get comfortable. So yeah, I think I've just been thinking about how much more on, like, am I willing to get more uncomfortable to see if I can be more? And just yet to get to know myself more. Yeah, and then would it, am I afraid of something if I don't do that? You know, there's practices in like just like my dating life or my like time scheduling or my organization, all those types of things where I could be doing, you know, where I could be doing better, you know, to have just like better sense of integrity with myself. And yeah, it's like, but sometimes I want to take these way out or I just want to do what feels good or yeah. And I'm not being super hard on myself. I'm just thinking like, I guess how many times do I want to go in some of these patterns where I don't get a different outcome? Yeah, so I guess I'm just thinking about that as the year ends and we're coming into a new year. And then like realistically challenging myself. Yeah, because I don't want to set myself up for just for failure. And then I don't want to be too hard on myself. So what are some realistic ways to challenge myself? So yeah, I'm not looking for any self pity or anything that I'm just thinking out loud. You know, I fell into a weird spot in this show over the past years where I used to just think out loud and then, and then I started fearing that a lot of it was self pity. So yeah, just I'm just grateful to be thinking out loud. I'm grateful to have some time to think out loud and I'm going to try to meditate more in the coming month. And that's going to help me have some more peace of mind. And that will give my brain a little bit more time to feel relaxed and to be able to have thoughts in be less reactive and more more responsive but not reactive. So I'm looking forward to that. Is any of this, any of this, this communication making sense, Trevon today? Yeah, for sure. Okay. I mean, it even ties back to the Ken Burns episode. I mean, it's like in the declaration, it's the pursuit of happiness. It's a pursuit, you know? Oh, that's what they say in it. Yeah, it's the pursuit of happiness, right? It's like, like yeah, America wasn't guaranteed, right? And it's the pursuit of happiness. But it's, yeah, it's something that it's not guaranteed. It's like, it has to continually be achieved. And in the end, the revolution was by the people. And it has to be achieved by, like, it's like never before in America as I felt like that we have to be the ones to pick ourselves up, pick our neighbors up and our friends up and do better by ourselves and by each other and just continue to do, right? Yeah, just continue to do that this is a doing. So yeah, I don't know. Maybe I'm seeing crazy, but I'll just, that's some stuff that's been on my mind. Do you think anybody else thinks about that? Trevin? Definitely. I do every day. Thanks, man. Yeah, thanks for helping me today, dude. I just feel like yeah, it's just a lot, man. It's a lot. Yeah, man, sometimes it's just a lot. And then it's also kind of scary when you realize, shit, this shit didn't guaranteed. You're like, you know, we've been walking around kind of big back in with the American flag in my generation in my lifetime. Like, damn, we've been out there big back in, you know. We had Michael Jordan and them went over there and beat the chopsticks off them dogs over there, you know? Like in the dream team, you know what I'm saying? We've had, you know what I'm saying? We've always been like America. But then you start to realize that a lot of the sports, all that's just, that's just the fun. That's the comfort food. The truth is just like, you know, is this going to continue? Is this still going to be, who's this going to be owned by? What's this house is going to be operated? Anyway, grateful to be able to think out loud. Thank you guys for listening to me. Thanks for being a part of this podcast. We got to be, and thanks, Trevin. I appreciate it, man. And congratulations, do we got to be on the podcast charge for Spotify? So I want to thank everybody that helped us make the charge just by paying attention at all our listening or even looking at a social media thing or calling in, letting us be a part of your life and letting us be a part of our lives. And I don't know if you'll sad all of a sudden for some reason, kind of. Trying to think a while a little bit, let me think. I think it feels a little bit scary. That's what I think it feels like to me. That feels a little scary. Thinking about what's going to happen, what could happen. And man, maybe I am getting paranoid. I agree. Also, it's got a new tooth. Put in my toothbrush, dough to eat, and some popcorn on a Southwest flight. But yeah, I think I'm feeling like, like just unsure. That's a lot of it. I think I'm feeling unsure about what the future looks like and it used to feel more certain. And that's kind of spooky. It's kind of spooky to feel some of that. So anyway, not trying to be a downer and boobie. I'm wearing this shirt today. I thank God I wore it. That just made me smile. And yeah, thank everybody that enjoyed the podcast or paid attention. And yeah, I can't believe that we did, that people absorb so many different episodes. And I'm thankful to Joe Rogan, who helped give me some suggestions over the past couple of years about podcasting. And just to be able to operate in a world where we get to talk. You know, when I was a kid, I never had a voice. I didn't have a voice for myself. I didn't have anybody teaching me how to have a voice or how to speak up for myself. I lived in a lot of fear and stuff like that. And so to just be in a place even more even if look, even if it's just like, damn, this honky is loud. That's just, I can't even believe that that was a turn of a venomous, that that was a little, that just making any type of chart where your voice is involved. Number one minute in time. What happens when your health becomes the punchline? 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There's a lot we posted them onto Facebook. We'll run their names at the end of this episode today. Thank you to our producers currently. Trevin, Nick, Zach, Powers early producer, Andrew Baxter, Nick Davis, Trevin's Stegel. So did you say you last name, Trevin? Stegel. Damn. Fuck dude. So we still have a lot to learn here, guys. That's all I'm saying. Trevin's Stegel. Thank you so much, dude. And yeah, I can't even believe that. Can you believe that? It's crazy. I can't. I mean, that's kind of crazy. I'm not saying next year we'll be back into, you know, we'll be the 11,000th podcast and in two years we'll be out of business. But, um, but just, it's just funny, man. I just cannot even believe that. That is crazy to me. Uh, but yeah, but just thanks for paying attention or not for paying just fucking, I don't know. Thanks for fucking around with this. Thanks for letting us just bother you. That's what I mean. Yeah. I honestly mean that. That's what I mean. For letting us bother you a little bit. Um, all right. Let's get into some calls here. Um, here we go. Yep. And it's a different time now. We need lesbians to get into heaven, man. That's the thing. Everybody now, we got all got to pull our weight. We all need, uh, even lesbians that we, we all need lesbians to get into heaven. You know, lesbians are helping people get into heaven. So obviously, you know, Hey, Theo, I just wanted to call. I wanted to ask you, man, I got a best friend. He has a problem. He's in love with lesbians. All of his girls that he falls in love with, carrying out the delesbians. And I just, we need some advice of how he can break through. How he can convert these girls. I just want to know if you got any advice on that, brother. Wow. How to bring a lesbian back, huh? How to bring a stud back out of the solar system and get them right here boots on the ground. Hmm. I think your buddy, and I've seen this before and the reason I'm saying this. I had a friend, uh, and I think we could still be friends. You haven't seen each other in a long time. So, but, um, anyway, he, he really was, uh, he really was homosexual. He was homosexual. And he, um, but he would try to date, uh, gay women because he was afraid to just date homosexual men. So it kind of wasn't cool. It's like if you were just trying to get the, because the truth is he's trying to get these women that are kind of like men. He's trying to get them to be full man. You know, and he would try to make them get jobs with like UPS or whatever. Do that kind of shit to try to get them all the way over there. You know, but no matter how many hours you work for UPS or, um, are you, um, are you working at the post office or whatever, you ain't going to sprout a wiener. You know, that shit is just, that's facts. So that was the kind of shit that he was trying to do. And we didn't realize it at first. We're just like, damn, he likes these tough women. You know, he likes these women. Like one of his chicks were wearing a fucking neck brace for no reason. You know, I'm saying that bitch was a, she, you know, she would do, she looked like a damn pesd a spencer over there. And she did drywall, you know, um, and, but anyway, uh, but anyway, the truth was he was trying to convert these women over to men. So I think your buddy could be homosexual, buddy. So I would sit your buddy down and I'd see if he's gay. Is he gay? Is your buddy gay? But after he's done deciding, if he likes men or women, tell them to fucking get his shit together and help this country out. Okay, that's all I'm telling him. After he's done deciding, if he likes, he's lit because a lot of these lesbian women, they got that long putty on them. You know what I'm saying, boy, a lot of them, they just, they'll stay in there just at night, just, just straining as hard as they can. Just trying to launch that, that, uh, just trying to launch that clam, just trying to elongate that sea lamb, baby. You know, a lot of them just trying to strain so much. They just sprout a hicc. But who knows? And I think I wish them well out there, brother praise God. Let's hear more. What do you think, Trevor? Does that fair to say to those guys? I think definitely if he wants a real challenge, there's bigger fish to fry. Yeah, you're trying to convert a lesion. Don't mess, don't mess that lady up like that. Just go either, get, get a straight woman or get a gay man. But don't sit here, standing on both sides of the fence. You ruined another people's shit. You out here, you talk, you talking to a girl with a boost. He fade in a ball cap over there and a Texas Rangers hat and a wife beat her or whatever. And she's taped her nipples down or whatever. Chill out, man. She drew hair on her chest between her tits. And you're, you know, you're trying to say, oh, you know, let me buy you a, let me buy you some oven mitts or something. Don't do that shit. Get out there and get what you really want, which is a man. Get that little Christmas wane or baby. Get that baby antler. You know what I'm saying? That can't. You out here pretending, wasting these lesbians times. Don't waste these lesbians times because we need them right now. They're helping us get into heaven. It's all hands on deck, baby. It's blacks versus drones. Baby, let's go. What else do we have? We got another call that came in right here. Yo, deal on my name is, my name is Patrick. What's up, Patrick? Good to hear from you, brother. Thank you for calling. I'm living in Washington, Illinois. Oh, you live in Washington, Illinois? Dude, my friend Corey used to live there. He was in the pipefitters union, dude. He might still be in it. I'm not going to text him. OK, onward. I kind of need some advice, though. I like, I want to ask this girl for her number, but like, you know, like I never really talked to her that much. We talked a little bit, but like, not that much. And looking, we got three lunch hours at our school. And we, I don't know what one she's switching through next semester that can crisp sprites. Like, can you like give me some advice to like, you know, get her number before Christmas break? I mean, dude, if you trying to get, I remembered that stuff for you trying to get a girl's number at school. That's hard, bro. God, because the nerves, dude, my nerves were so high during school, I couldn't even do anything. Dude, every time I even saw a girl, I had to go to the office and get ice on my head. Dude, if I tried to ask her girl to a dancer, whatever, I would just wake up in the lobby or whatever, cover it in ice or whatever, eight bags of ice. They'd have me fucking just iced out, bro. I looked like damn two chains out there running a fever, though, dude. It was just, dude, I did, they, yeah. If I even, dude, if I even wrote check yesterday, no one a piece of paper on fucking, I'd fall out my chair like one of those little little Joe Rogan baby videos, you know? So dude, I don't have any advice. You kidding, bro? What are you even talking about, dude? You know, I couldn't do shit. You haven't heard any of these podcast, bro? I got nothing to talk. You think I got advice for you? Dude, I don't have a woman. You think I can help you get somebody? And I will say this, so dude, there's nothing better than talking to the girl and when or lose. Cause you walk off and you like, yup. At least I tried, bro. That's American shit. That's American shit, bro. Dude, just say, hey, give me half your number. Don't even put it all on her. Give me half your number. Cause that's even easier. Cause here's the thing. If she wants you to have all of it, she'll make sure you get the rest of it. Say, hey, give me half your number and then give her a, an envelope or something with your address on it for the Mayo, put the stamps on it. And say, look, if you want me to have the other half, send me that bit. You know, then at least you got some excitement come. You got Santa sending you something. Christmas means something right there. So that's kind of something, dude. But yeah, dude, I remember I asked some girl to a dance one time. She said, yes, I was high on mushrooms. I always admit that, but I got so excited. Right when she said, yes, I ran through this party of children outdoors, ran, jumped over a chain link and fans cut my hand and stomach open. Had a good emergency room ambulance, everything. So yeah, dude, you got the wrong guy, bro. But I love that, bro. And yeah, you did you get over there and you say, look, I would love to have one number of your phone number. Just start there. Don't ask for the whole number, but don't be greedy, bro. Get one number. See what happened, bro. You know what I'm saying? Leave room for God to work. Praise God, brother. Good luck out there. What do you think? Trevor, that's fair. He's got to pursue it, bro. Pursuit the happiness. Yeah, you got to pursue. That's true. It's the pursuit of happiness. It's not guaranteed, bro. That's true. It's the pursuit. You're right, bro. Yeah, you got to get over there. Dude, I'm trying to think of what you could do. But you can't be crazy. Dude, look, if she's not interested, you can't make somebody interested. But you can just have a little bit of energy about you. Here we go right here. And happy holidays to everybody at Merry Christmas. The hotline is always 95664-9503. Hey, Theo. My name's Casey. What's up, Casey? Thanks for calling. I'm drinking a little Celsius. I'm a fan. I've been a little simpler a long time. I'm a little drunk right now, which is the only reason I called in. Just long let you know. I just couldn't do your episode for you. We're talking about garlic bread. It's the best. I love garlic bread. So much. I can't even tell you much. I've freaking love garlic bread. But even more than that, I love you. I love garlic bread. And I love you to fly the light. You know, you're the best. Keep doing what you're doing. Don't ever stop. You love the add my heart. Bread and I love you. Damn, that girl's Italian boy. Oh, wow. That garlic bread. That shit is good, bro. When that shit gets hard at the edges, bro, and it turns up a little because you start that biz flat, right? That garlic bread, man. You know what I'm saying, man? And you put that in the end, it turns up like the edges are trying to get into the middle. That's what's up. I'm like, damn, maybe girl, let's like that. I'm going to leave the window open for you. So, but yeah, that woman's Italian. All right. Thank you for calling. And yeah, thank you for liking garlic bread. I like it. And I'm glad that I like it. So, all right. What else we got here? Atheo. It's called Hey, man, it's December 1st right now. And you know, it's supposed to be the holidays where everyone's all happy and shit. But man, every year, this time of year is the worst for me. Like everyone's supposed to be happy during Christmas. And I'm just sitting there trying to just pretend to be happy, but it's tough. No, I got my birthday this month too. And like everything is supposed to be good, but it's always just a rough time of year. I was curious if you ever dealt with that or had any of this. Appreciate you. Okay. Yeah, man, thanks for the call. Uh, what the Dylan was it? Atheo. It's Colin. Colin. Sorry. Yeah, dude. Dude, there's sometimes when I get on here to do this podcast where I'm not as happy as I, uh, you know, this is the, like, this is me, like kind of not maximum happiness, but there's times where I sit down and I think about stuff. And sometimes I want to, like, I don't want to be happy. Um, you know, I want to either be more earnest or I want to be more, like share things that I'm scared of or fear, you know, I think there's times like that. There's times where I feel some responsibility like, oh, I can't, I can't have people listen in and then, and then listen to some guy be sad. That's shitty. You know, what's even going on then? Um, and not, not in a heavy way, but yeah, it's like, uh, yeah, I mean, yeah, sometimes I'm scared. I'm scared about stuff. You know, I'm scared what, you know, if everything's going to be okay, that's like a big fear that's always with me. You know, and I don't even know where it came from. It's been there my whole life is everything going to be okay. Think about that fear, right? I'm just thinking about it out loud. I've never really even thought about it. What an insane fear. I've had it since I was a kid is everything going to be okay. I've never said it vocally out like this before. That's an impossible thing for somebody to carry around. That's realistic, right? Of course, everything isn't going to be okay. But to think that there's some kid that is like, you know, that as a kid or as a young man, I was walking with that all the time and then it still sometimes is like, um, it's like a beat of sweat that, you know, uh, kind of shows up on the, on the shower door of my brain sometimes, you know, um, yeah, it's everything going to be okay. Fuck no, it's not. Some things will something, but it just, you know, that weird feeling, you know, that's something that's like, um, oh, I have to do something. What do I need to do? That's always been something that's a thing that's one of my repetitive things. What do I have to do? You know, like if people are over and was like, it's too hot, it's too cold. I'm standing like, I can't, there's not like, are you hot or cold? 50 seconds later, I'm like, hey, I know we've been talking for another minute or two. Are you getting any hotter or colder? It's like, I can't, you know, it's tough for me to let things be. It's tough for me to let things be. It's tough for me not to take an action to do something. Because that's scary. It's scary for me if I let things be, then it's out of my control. And that's scary. And the truth is though, a lot of it's so much of it's out of my control anyway. So much of it's out of my control. Yeah, and I think it's turning that over that, if I can, if I can, and I'm not pestering myself, but if I could get more comfortable with when that feeling comes up with like, okay, I need to do something, I need to say something, I need to, I need to, I need to ask somebody if they're hotter, cold. If I could be like, you know, just, God's got this. I'm just going to have faith that everything's okay. I'm just going to have faith that everything's okay. Yeah, if I could just lean into some more of those moments of just, I don't have to affect this. Anyway, I'm talking about me, man, let me listen to your question again so I can try to talk about you. And I'm sorry. Sitting there talking about myself, Jesus. No, like everyone's supposed to be happy during Christmas. And I'm just sitting there trying to just pretend to be happy, but it's tough. No, I got my birthday this month too. Like everything is supposed to be good, but it's always just a rough time here. I was curious if you ever got with that or had any of this. Appreciate you. Yeah, I think it's, it's an okay time to take a nap. First of all, let me say that. It's an okay time not to fight the wars that are out there. It's an okay time not to hit some man or woman who's dressed up like an elf on a lime scooter or whatever who's been drinking. It's an okay not to hit them with your car. It's an okay time not to engage in too much of the crazy stuff. I mean, this is a time of year when a lot of animals go hibernate. You know, a lot of animals go hibernate. Even the sun isn't even out that long. So for us to be like, hey, it's kind of a lot. It's kind of going against nature. So I think it's okay to take some time for yourself and like not feel the overwhelming sense of I have to do everything. Like earlier today, I was like, oh, people are probably going to Christmas parties. Nobody's inviting me to any Christmas parties, right? I was thinking of that. And my mom invited me to a Christmas party at her house and my friend Bo inviting me to a Christmas party with his family around Christmas. But I hadn't gotten invited to anything like, you know, I'm home. It's before Christmas. Boba, blah. So and that's okay. But I need to just be like, hey, this is a great time for me to read, to work on my stepwork that I'm going through again, to enjoy some time with myself, not to feel that FOMO, not to feel this overwhelming sense of like, let me have a, let me control. Let me, you know, I wonder why I don't feel at peace very much because I don't let myself be at peace very much. But for your instance, sorry, I'm still talking about me, dude, bro, stop. But I think there's two sides this I was talking to my friend, Chris today and he was saying he was feeling kind of down. And I noticed this, if I do those things, like I can isolate during the holidays as well, and that's not good. During Thanksgiving, I kind of showed up to my family and I didn't have the best attitude. And I knew in my head what was going on. And there were moments I was able to work through it and show up and do okay. I think I wanted to spend some alone time with my mom. I didn't get that. And so when things weren't going kind of exactly what I wanted in my turn, you know, this side of me comes out that's, you know what I'll cut myself off from people. It would be like, oh, things aren't kind of perfect here right now. Then I'm not going to apply myself to this situation. I'm going to cut my emotions, my feeling. I'm going to kind of keep everything away from you. You know, things aren't exactly the way I want them. I'm going to keep myself from you. I didn't really. I'm just hurting myself. But also I'm kind of in, I can be kind of like not helping the environment around me. But that's been a thing of mine over the years I realized like a way that I'll try to hurt somebody's feelings is I'll try to keep my, I'll keep my, I'll keep my love away from them. Which is kind of crazy to say out loud, I think. And I don't know exactly what I mean by it, but I've noticed it at times. Like, oh, this isn't kind of the way I want it then, then you're not going to get any of me. I can kind of know what I'm saying, but part of me doesn't know exactly what I'm saying. But did it make any sense to me, you think? Yeah, it's just like close, close off. Yeah, yeah, close off. And sometimes it's, there's only a, I'll only be home for a certain amount of time or only be around family a certain amount of time. So there's not a ton of time for really us to have time together. And even in those moments, it's like I'll, I'll almost shut down here, you know. So yeah, I can tend to kind of get that way. But brother, I think, yeah, don't expect too much out of the holidays. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself. But try to bring some joy to yourself. Go do something that finds you some joy. Do not isolate too much. Because you also can bring joy to other people, you know. That's the worst part about when I shut down is what I'm really missing out on. It's not really me like, it's just like, if I show up in a good mood, I can help somebody else have a nice time. You know, maybe I can play with the baby or I can see my friend's dog or I can you know, tell my sister she has a nice shirt or that she looks pretty or, you know, I can do little things. I can sit and play a game. I can do something. I can talk to someone else at the family, get together that I don't know. It's like, it's like if I don't shut down, if I don't get in that selfish way, then I can do, I can just be a part of what is of the best situation. Not for me, but just what's the best possible outcome is that I just try to show up with a smile on face. How can I help? And, but yes, sometimes you have to pretend to be happy, man. Here's the thing, you pretend to be happy eventually, you will be. That's the craziest part. You pretend to be happy, you will eventually, you will be. Yeah, I think, I think, you know, I think anything, if you do it, you will feel like, actions first. People think you have to like, think it first. No. You can't think yourself into right actions, but you can act yourself into right thinkings. Can you look that up for me on a perplexity, please? Who is one of our sponsors? Thank you perplexity, probably us figure stuff out. Yeah, many people can act themselves in a good thinking because behavior often reshapes beliefs, emotions, and self-image over time. So, yeah, I think it's like, yeah, you don't have to pretend that everybody's happy, maybe you're not the happiest guy. You don't have to be Santa. You could be one of his elves that smokes behind the wood shop. You don't have to be the best guy. You know, what about go watch bad Santa? Just do a gateway package into some sort of holiday vibes. You know, watch Miracle on 34th Street, but then watch Nightmare on Elm Street. You know, I'm saying do both. You can do, you know, I'm saying there's a mix of everything out there, but I do believe that if you show up and you find a place to show up that feels kind of comfortable to you, to your birthday, whoever invites you over for your birthday or somebody calls you, if you try to show up with the best part to you, even if you have to pretend that I think the best part to you will meet those pretendings halfway. I believe that. I don't think it makes any sense, but yeah, I think you can act your way in a feeling better, but you don't have to do. Yeah, Christmas gets on a lot of people's nerves, especially this time here. It's hectic. There's so many things to do. So don't be hard on yourself. Don't over isolate. It's a balance. I think everything is. But yeah, I appreciate you calling, dude. I appreciate you because yeah, it's like, fuck, sometimes we all have to pretend to be happy. But I think that's a lot of things. I have friends and marriages that tell me it's like, dude, every day you wake up, you don't want to be married. But on some of those days, you just pretend that you want to be married, you know? And then you get to the days where you do want to be. So I don't know. I know if we just ramble a lot about me and I didn't help you at all. Not that I was trying to help you or that. I don't know. I don't know. Shit. Look at me. But, fuck, dude. What are we going to do about America? That's right. That's a big question, you know. But blessings to you, dude. Happy holidays. And, yeah, thanks for just being here and letting me think with the out loud. Love you, brother. And I'm going to send you a birthday present. So I'll reach out and send you a birthday present. Yeah. And I hope if you don't join a bunch of other people and feel great there, that we can find ways to feel great with ourselves. Good enough. You know, that's the even crazier trick. It's like, sometimes I'm using going out to see people and do things just to get away from myself, which is crazy. Just to get away from those moments where it's me and me standing there in the living room of my head. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. The holidays are a time of traditions. Some people have many in their family and some have none or they're just beginning their own. Now's the time to reflect on what they mean to you or to rewrite those traditions and make them your own. Incorporating therapy into your new or existing traditions can help ensure you take time for yourself during what can be a very joyful but sometimes hectic and lonely time of year. One tradition we have in my family is verbal altercations. And leaving family events early and crying in our vehicles. That's something we like to do. What are yours? Well, BetterHelp can help. BetterHelp Therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the US. With over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is one of the world's largest online therapy platforms, having served over 5 million people globally. This December start a new tradition by taking care of you. Our listeners get 10% off at BetterHelp.com slash Theo. That's betterheelp.com slash THEO. What's another call? You want to pick one off of your trevon that you like? There's a couple of them. We get a list usually of calls here and so. What about a follow up on twins advice for twins from the baby me episode? Oh, that's a great call. That's a great call. Good call. Yeah, that's a great idea because we just had somebody call in who is having twins and I don't believe in them. But this person has some twin advice. Here we go. Yeah, my name is Michael from Indianapolis. I'm calling and hopefully respond to Cage. You called in on your last episode about having twins and eating some of life. And I guess now you know, this can go to Cage and Riley now. Congratulations on all y'all, man. Tissue of rough, man. There's the best hell that you could ever willingly put yourself through. Wow, the best hell you could willingly put yourself through. That's a beautiful statement. Let's hear more. Thank you so much. And I mean that. There also the most rewarding thing that you could ever do. And you just got to pocket over. If anybody some of us managed just to you got to take care of yourself. Well, lady has to take care of herself. You got to take care of each other. Can't afford for an iffy cut. So if you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of her. She don't take care of herself. She can't take care of you. You want to take care of yourself. You can't take care of each other. In turn, you can't take care of your kids. But I have to say, you guys have to take care of yourself. That's the main thing, man. You got to take some of the dog time. Be there. Be a dad. Be a mom. Be active. Be present. But man, if you got parents that won't mind, you know, watching the kid overnight, one time take advantage of that, man. Oh, part of you'll make some crazy decisions as long as you can go to work Monday, clock, and then be a dad again. Then. And take care of yourself, man. That's my biggest advice. Amen. Yeah, that's true. So now we're like, yeah, how much how can I do all these things? And I'm, yeah, I show up, you know, I show up to fix a car with no tools. Because I ain't take care of my own shit. I'm over there pretending just making a note with using my hand, just making a wrench noise while I use it. Take care of yourself first and you can take care of those twins. I love that. Here's another one right here. Let's see what came in. Hey, deal is Cody from Florida. Hey, Cody, thanks for calling, brother. How are you today? Onward. And uh, I just heard you, you're big on the topics with having a porn addiction and being an alcoholic. I know you did that 12 step program and honestly, man, those two things are the biggest problems in my life. I just had my girlfriend over a year break up with me because of a porn addiction, which that is just so embarrassing. I can't even like think of myself like as a normal person anymore. I think I feel so embarrassed. I just, I feel such like a like a weak man. And the alcohol problem is not I want to know what you did to to help yourself with both of those addictions, mainly mainly the porn addiction to the audience. And that's just that's so embarrassing to say. But hey, brother, thanks for ringing us up here. And yet, the only things I know that have helped me with any type of addiction are 12 step recovery programs. I know some people use different programs or different things. People have used rehab detox. I know that some people need those sorts of things. I haven't used, I've used like some short term rehab. I've not had to use long term rehab or detox in my life yet. And yeah, those are the things that I know. There's SLA meetings, sex and love addiction online. And you can find that you can just attend on Zoom. There are great places to start and local AA meetings. And I would go to three meetings, three different ones until you see what you think about it. But those programs I know work. There's no lifelong cure. It's a daily, it's a daily reprieve. And it works if you work it. I believe those things. And it will get better. It will get better if you go and work on it. Yeah, nothing changes. If nothing changes, we've talked about that before. And that's the truth. I've thought things would change in my life. If they all just grow out of it, this will happen or this person will come along. I'll move somewhere in this. No, it's, it doesn't more often than not. None of those things help. I'm not saying never. For me, for me. Yeah, but I'm sorry that you're dealing with that loss. But also in a way, I'm glad that you are realizing this and you can get a hold of it now. Because there's no time like the present man. And what a great gift to ourselves to try and take care of ourselves better. So a man to you, brother, I love you. And yeah, thanks for calling and letting us think about that. Let's do this call right here. It might be time to get on out of here. And I know this episode maybe it was a little bit heavy. Was this episode too heavy, Travis? I don't think so. We got there. Okay. Yeah, my nervous system's getting a little bit burnt out. So here we go. Hi, CEO. I'm calling from Ohio and I just want to let you know, I have reached one year sober. It has been the worst ride possible, but I finally did it. And I'm just calling to let you know, you and you have been a huge part of my journey in every way possible. I remember being just fucked up on drugs and alcohol watching your show. And now I watch your show sober without fucking drugs and alcohol. And I still laugh like I used to. It is the best thing ever. So I just want to say thank you. And do you have any advice for the other people that are trying to get sober? You know, just spread the love and keep going. Thank you, CEO. Bye. Hey, man. Congratulations. That's awesome. Thanks so much for sharing that message. Yeah, and I'm I feel like it'd be part of a podcast that we're able to even talk about that kind of stuff or that you're that you're able to call and share that message. And congratulations. One year, that's crazy. That's beautiful. And shit, your voice was so loud in the beginning. Hi, CEO. And almost got on my damn nerves. That's crazy. I'm like, dang, she's doing so good. She's lit up. lit up by the Lord and the feelings of of self-worth. And so that's a beautiful that is beautiful to hear around this time of year. And anytime, man, you hear somebody feel proud of themselves. That's beautiful. And I'm glad that this show could just be a part of something. And that's one of the things that makes me so lucky. Like just like even as being a part of this show, it's like, what could God use us to do if we put ourselves in the best situation? You know, and can I meet God halfway? And I know, I know we've talked about that a little bit before. And not that God is in all the way. I know he's all the way there. But I'm just saying like, yeah, just the beauty of what God can use all of us for if we make ourselves an available tool, you know, kind of. So, but man, what a time of year to, I know this was a lot of thinking about me this episode. I'm sorry about that. Look at that guy on this shirt, that little Rick Shaw donkey right there. That little fucking lesbian school teacher. I love him, boobie. Yeah. Yeah, we got, we're here, you know, we're here. We're alive. We got a shot. We got a shot. We can figure it out. We can't do it alone. And, uh, yeah, and what did I start talking about? What things do we want to, if I wanted to yell something, if I wanted to just say something to the heavens, maybe that's it, you know, just like, man, what could I, what could I be used for? You know, if I can, you know, just let me be, I don't know, what could I be used for if I, if I, and maybe it's just if I just ask God, you know, you know, and that's one of the morning prayers that, uh, as part of my routine right now, it's just asking God to, uh, use me and build with me as thou will. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, there's so much out there, you know, there's so much out there. Um, anyway, I don't know if I've, did we cover everything? You think Trevon, are we okay? Yeah, we're good. Okay, man. Um, thank you so much for your help this year, Trevon. Anytime. And, uh, yeah, we do our best. We're trying. It's just another day, right? We don't have to save the world today. Whew, that feels good. You done? Feel good to know that? Yeah. Um, okay. Who knows? I love you guys. Thanks for being a part of the podcast today. Thanks for your calls. There's always the hotline 9856649503. Congratulations to the young lady getting a year sober to the guy who's birthday is coming up. We love you, bro. Enjoy your holidays. Make them enjoyable for you somehow. It is in the end. It's our somewhat our responsibility to find joy. Okay. Anyway, I'm getting chatty. Love you guys. You guys be good to yourselves. You deserve it. Thank you so much for helping with the Jersey auction. We raised almost $40,000 to, um, go to the Cumberland Heights Recovery Center. It's going to help subsidize recovery for individuals over there. And, um, and for the, um, the show with Mike Rowe, where we were helping people buy stuff from their fellow Americans. Anyway, whatever. All right. You guys have a wonderful one. And, um, love you guys. And, uh, yeah, talk to you later. Bye. Okay