Ep. 575: Our 11th Anniversary! Favorite Moments from the Past Year

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Hello and welcome to Happier, a podcast where we talk about ways to make our lives happier. This week, it is our 11th anniversary. We will share highlights from the previous year. I'm Gretchen Rubin, a writer who studies happiness, good habits, human nature. I'm in my little home office in New York City. And joining me today from Los Angeles, 11 years without a break, is my sister Elizabeth Craft, my co-host, and always my sister the sage. That's me, Elizabeth Craft, a TV writer and producer living in LA. And yes, today, this very day, if you're listening to us, the day this episode drops, is our 11th anniversary. February 25th, 2015. Yay! Yay! So fun! Yes! So today we will talk about some of the big moments from the previous year, some of our favorite ideas. But first, a few updates. Yes, this comes from Cindy. She says, love that neighbor is your word of the year. My phrase is blue china, derived from Oscar Wilde's quote, I find it harder and harder every day to live up to my blue china. Wilde was referring to how difficult it is to make our inner worlds match the aesthetic beauty of the external. and that when you elevate one area of your life, it can be easy to feel shabby about the parts that are left the same. I chose Blue China for 2026 to remind me to strive to be more generous, stronger, smarter, and mindful of all the areas of my life that should be attended to. I really loved Cindy's choice because this quotation from Oscar Wilde has haunted me. Like, of course, I love aphorisms, and Oscar Wilde is one of the most famous aphorisms in English. And this line that he wrote in a letter when he was an undergraduate, it caused a sensation at the time. And I think it's very mysterious. And I've often thought, like, what did he mean by that? And I think Cindy's explanation of what he meant is so profound. I thought this was a very imaginative way to pick a theme for the year. So I love that. And what a fun visual she can have, too. Oh, exactly. Yeah. And one reminder, Determination Day is coming up on February 28th. 28th. Of course, it's called Determination Day, not Discouragement Day, because we are reframing that day. Research shows that by the end of February, most people have abandoned their New Year's resolution. So Determination Day is a day to start again. And if you are tackling a big project and you are feeling stuck, check out my new Audible original project. It's called Get It Done. And it has lots of practical strategies for getting things actually done, how you break it to steps, you keep your momentum going. If you go to audible.com slash get it done, you can find it there. Yes, Crutch, we just got a letter from someone who said, get it done, helped her finish a project. Yes, I know. I'm so gratified by that. So let's just, let's jump into our reflections of the previous year. I don't know if you thought about this, but it turns out that the 11th anniversary is the steel anniversary. I always love all the, what would you call them? The wood, the paper, what are they? They're the materials. Symbol. Yes. The materials associated with it. So I thought, oh, well, you know, maybe to symbolize the strength of our relationship, I give you like a steel spinning top. Or then I thought, well, maybe I'd get you a steel knife. But, you know, I'm sure you know that there's a superstition that you should never give knives as a gift because they cut your bond. Yes. If you give someone a knife, you're supposed to have them pay you a penny. So technically they're paying for the knife instead of you giving the knife as a gift because otherwise that can sever your ties in two. But it's now spent February. So I didn't get you anything. Well, that's okay. I didn't get you anything either. Okay. Good, good, good. It's the thought that counts, but happy anniversary. Yeah. Happy steel anniversary. Yes. Yeah. Gretch, I remember where I was when our first episode went live because I was in Hawaii on vacation with Jack and Adam. And I remember checking the downloads and seeing at one point there were 12 downloads and just being absolutely thrilled. And never did I think, oh, 11 years from now, we'll be recording well into the 500s of our episodes. One thing that we brag about all the time, or at least I brag about all the time, listen, is that we've never taken a break. Like we've had, you know, an original episode every week. but truthfully it didn't occur to us. I think we were like in year two, year three, before somebody said like, Oh, well, what do you guys do when you take a vacation or something? And we were like, Oh, can you do that? I mean, and we knew that other podcasts do that, but how is it that it didn't occur to us that we could do that? Well, I think podcasts were so new at that point. We just went with what made sense to us, But now it would feel like such a bad superstition to take a break. Oh, yeah. Even when dad was so sick. Yes. We did not take a break. Right. No, we figured out a way to do it ahead of time. But this is the power of the streak, which, of course, comes up all the time with habit formation, is that once you have a streak going, the streak itself is a powerful form of accountability. You really feel like you want to keep that streak. You want to uphold that streak. And that is definitely the truth for us. But I do remember, so now we do the more happier, which is like, you know, we do a couple of those every month and we have the revisited. And with the more happier, it's looser. It's less structured. Not everything has a point. It's all supposed to be interesting. Do you remember the first time I had this idea? I was like, let's do it unplugged. Let's do one that's just like us on the phone. No ads. Like you're behind the scenes on Substack where you and Sarah are just truly talking the way you would if no one else was in the audience. But it took us like nine months to do it because they had planned out the ads and everything so far in advance because we'd never taken a break like that before. So that was funny. I was like, oh, wow, we really are on a schedule. Yeah, we're part of the systems. And that was interesting to realize that. Yeah, we should do another one of those episodes. That was fun. That was. Well, I think sometimes we do it now with the voice memos. That's kind of how we've morphed into it. Yes. Yeah. And those we just throw in. Yeah, it is funny how we have our own little trends that we do. You know what we're overdue for is a DEX episode. Yes, we are. Well, the spring is coming up. Yes, we got to do some DEX. Yep. All right, Gretch, coming up, we are going to talk about some of our favorite discussions from this year. But first, this break. 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Quo, no missed calls, no missed customers. You know, Liz, I'm in the empty nest phase, which I'm also calling the open door phase. And I've talked to people a lot about that empty nest transition. And one thing that is a challenge for many people is healthy eating. When the kids are gone, it's easy to slip into really bad habits. And that's why Hungry Root is such a great solution. Hungry Root takes care of the weekly meal planning, recommending healthy recipes tailored to your taste, nutrition preferences, and health goals. Hungry Root makes it simple to eat healthier without overthinking it. One of my big things is that I don't eat sugar, and they have an option with less sugar. Most resolutions die within a few weeks of the new year, but Hungry Root makes eating healthier so easy that you can seriously stay on track with your health goals or new diet past January. Take advantage of this exclusive offer. For a limited time, get 40% off your first box, plus get a free item in every box for life. Go to HungryRoot.com slash Gretchen Rubin and use code Gretchen Rubin. That's HungryRoot.com slash Gretchen Rubin. Code Gretchen Rubin to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life. We're back celebrating our 11th anniversary and by far the overwhelming most important event in our life for the past year was the death of our father in December. And it was a real solace to talk about him, to hear from so many listeners about what they'd learned from him. In episode 570, we shared a lot of the advice and insights that listeners sent to us and that we had discovered ourselves or that people had told us. That was a very meaningful episode, don't you think? Oh, yeah. And it's not an episode we wanted to have, but given the state that we've been in, it was so necessary and valuable and really moving as well. Yes. Well, as we talked about, we, with our mother, spent a lot of time working on the obituary for our father, which ended up being sort of a more like a eulogy. It was very long and personal. And we got this lovely note from our listener, Christina, because I read that obituary as a little happier episode for anybody who wanted to hear the whole thing. Christina wrote, a loss and what a legacy. I don't have the best relationship with my parents, so I couldn't help but imagine what my new son will think of me throughout our years together and what he would write one day when I am gone. I wanted to thank you for giving me something to aspire to, and I thought it might mean something to know that the words you so carefully crafted have landed here, far away, like traveling sparks landing on timber. While I'm sure the flare of intense emotions will fade, I believe the embers will stay with me as I navigate my own path through parenthood. Your father, though unknown to me, will stand as an emblem of the best of what a parent can be. What a legacy, as you put it, to feel myself beloved on this earth. Well, that is just so moving to both of us. Yes, and so beautifully said. I love the embers on a timber, and it means so much to us that others can feel dad's energy. Yes, his energy. Yes, he talked a lot about it. He likes to talk about energy. He talked about energy, yes, that his energy reached people who never even met him in person. Yeah. Well, Gretchen, and then in happier news, we got a lot of response to our discussion about your new puppy, Taffy. Yes. Whether you should get that second dog and the atmosphere of growth, and you did get Taffy. Yes, she arrived in April. We got many suggestions from listeners. Elizabeth, of course, you were my main inspiration because when you got your second dog, you were so happy that I thought you got a second dog. And then I started thinking, well, maybe we could get a second dog. So yes, Tappy has made us very happy. Yes. Of course, we forgot that I can just let our dogs out in the backyard and you have to walk them every single time. Yes, I did kind of overlook that, but she's worth it. She's worth it. One thing that kept coming up over and over throughout the year, and actually I saw that it had trended on Google Trends, was Whimsy. We've talked about Whimsy throughout the year, but now I think we want more Whimsy than ever before. Yes. Like we talked about renting a cotton candy machine, choosing your derby name, which always cracks me up. Yeah. And in fact, we did a very special episode 540 on adding Whimsy to our lives. Yeah, that was very fun. You're Lightning Lizzie. Yes, and you're the arrow, right? I know. We could do more with those derby names, Elizabeth. That's whimsy that we haven't exploited to the full. Yeah, you know, there's some words that people like and don't like, and I think whimsy is a word that people like. Absolutely. Well, I think another big theme, and I hadn't really focused on what a theme this was until I had reviewed the year, which is connecting with friends. And again, this is a major element of a happy life. We talk about friends every year, but it felt like this year it kept coming up and we had all sorts of different ways for getting at it. One was raise your hand, meaning acknowledge that if something's going to happen, you have to be the one to do it, to put together the group or to move a process forward and that it's a lot of work, but that it's worth it. Yes, we also talked about starting a Stammstisch. Which we can't say. Which we can never pronounce, German word. Yeah. Which is, it's a German word, and it means to have like a regular gathering that you can just show up to. You don't have to RSVP. Yeah, it's like a happy hour at a bar or, yeah, it's a regulars meeting. Yes. We talked about the value of having a party because we're always trying to get ourselves to entertain more. This is like... Yes, it's an ongoing... We know that we love it. We're always happy we did it. But then flipping it on the other side, we talked about the importance of bewaring the impulse to disengage. That sometimes when things feel hard or you feel overwhelmed, we just want to stay home, sit on the sofa, binge watch, doom scroll. And that can feel in the moment sort of restorative or I need to take some time for myself or I don't want to, I'm too exhausted to put myself out there. But what the research shows, and I think you and I both find over and over, is that it's when you put yourself out there, that's when you get the energy that comes from engagement. Yes. I'm so glad we talked about that. And I have to remind myself because it is very tempting to just sit on the couch. All of these we need to remind ourselves as much as everything. This is a good review. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good point. And then, of course, Gretchen, every year we do Design Your Year, which is one of our favorite elements of the podcast. Yeah, love designer year. This year, my word was door because I'm in the open door period because that's my alternative to the empty nest because nobody likes the phrase empty nest. Love door. And mine was bounce because I wanted to sort of bounce into the future and rebound. And I had a kangaroo for my symbol, which is one of my favorite symbols I've had. Yeah, you're really good at picking one word themes and symbols, I think. the reading challenge this year was to read 26 and 26. This was so great. And a highlight was the reading retreat. How had we not thought of this before, Elizabeth? I do not know. We are a two person reading retreat. We just took ourselves someplace and read all day. And it was amazing. Yes. And now we have the concept of same day books. Now that was so fun. And people love the idea of a same day book. And now I look at books in a different way because I'm like, same day book? Not same day book. And I liked your helpful breaking it into two categories. One, it's the same day book because it's short. The other is the same day book because it's just so page turning that you literally don't do anything else until you finish the book. And then sometimes they're both, which is even better. And of course, we did our slow read of War and Peace. Simon Hazel does Footnotes and Tangents, which is a series of slow reads. We did War and Peace. And it was especially meaningful to us, Gretchen, because I think it is one of kind of the last activities, I guess you'd say, we did with dad. And so I think it really meant even more to us than it would have. Yeah. We all talked about War and Peace like it was a TV show. Yeah. You know, because the thing about it, you read at the same pace, too. So we were always more or less at the same place. Yeah, that was very gratifying. Alyssa, you're doing Wolf Hall this year, too, with Simon Hazel. Yeah. We'll put a link to footnotes and tangents in the show notes if that appeals to you. And Elizabeth, I am doing much better at not finishing books. This is something that I've been working on for years. I always meant to not finish a book if I didn't like it, but I found it very hard actually to put a book down. And now I'm doing it much faster and I love it. That's so good because now you have time, more time to read more books that you want to read. Yeah, exactly. Which I knew all along was the case, but somehow I just... Of course. And then it's always fun to reflect on last year. Every year we make the list and it's always fun to reflect on the previous list, our 25 for 25 list, and then to come up with our 26 for 26 list. I don't think I've crossed anything off my 26 list still, but I'm making some progress. How about you, Alyssa? I'm making some progress. Yeah, I think maybe a few things. I'd have to look. I definitely am almost done with Mad Men. Oh, Oh, yeah. Which I thought would take the whole year. But of course, once I started rewatching it. Oh, good. I wish I were rewatching it with you. And then along with Design Your Year, we have Design Your Summer. That was episode 486. That's always fun. It's really focusing in on it. That season feels different from the rest of the year to a lot of people So it fun to Design Your Summer And then of course Gretchen we had the theme of the four tendencies which we talked about at least once every week if not multiple times We had understanding obliger rebellion in episode 542 because that is a very common, but a very mysterious phenomenon. Had a question, a questioner. That was a listener question from episode 556. I'm married to a questioner, so this is something that is of immense importance to me personally, and solving rebel resistance to something desirable in episode 548. That's something that rebels and people around rebels often have to navigate is how to deal with rebel resistance. If you have no idea what we're talking about, this is the Four Tendencies Framework. Take the quiz at gretchenrubin.com. Just go to my website and look for a quiz. You'll find it and all will be revealed. Gretchen, how many millions of people at this point have taken your quiz? Well, the last time I checked, it was three and a half million. But I haven't checked in a while, so I should check. Now, a lot of people, it's fast, it's free, it's fun. It will explain so much about yourself. Everybody take that quiz. Another thing we talked a lot about last year because of your phase of life is The Empty Nest. Yes, I am writing a book about The Empty Nest. If anybody has insights, observations, resources, questions, funny stories, hit me up. Email us at podcast at GretchenRubin.com because I'm in my phase of just gulping down anything that I can get. So we've talked about it some on the podcast, but I am still pushing forward a lot on that material. So I love hearing from listeners on that. And of course we have to mention our favorite hacks. Love a hack. My favorite hack, oh my gosh, is my wetsuit for swimming. This unlocked a whole world of water sports and water activities for me because I was always just so cold. I couldn't bear to get wet. And finally, it occurred to me, is there a way not to get cold when I'm wet? And yes, there's a whole category of product for that. And I love my wetsuit so much. One of my favorite things I've ever bought for myself. Well, similar but different, Gretchen, is a gift that you gave to me, which is the heated throw blanket. Again, how did I not know that this thing existed? It's an electric blanket, but instead of going on your bed, It just goes over your lap on the sofa and it's absolutely delightful, not just physically, but mentally. It's comforting. Yes, it is. And it's very soft. I'll put a link to the one that I got. It's faux fur and it just feels good. It's not too heavy. I thought it might be really heavy. It's a really delightful thing. And then something I've talked a lot about is paddle lights. So finally, in a world of using Zoom so much, instead of having a ring light, which causes rings in my glasses, I've switched to paddle lights, which are much better. Now, it is possible then to have the paddle reflected in your glasses, but it's much easier to deal with. So I recommend these paddle lights to everybody. Well, it's funny because you have struggled with this for years. Ever since sort of we started using video more, this has been an issue for you. And it's such a relief that you have even a mostly useful solution. One thing we talked about, and this is really fun, is to create a family familect. And a familect is the words, the vocabulary that a family develops that's just their own private language. And people really love this idea. Most families do have a familect, but maybe you didn't know that there was a word for it or that people studied these familects. Yes. And then, Gretchen, episode 566, we talked about accountability hacks. So many of us need accountability, and people have so many creative ways to create accountability. Again, listeners, I am collecting accountability. So if you have a website that you use, an app that you use, something funny that you do, I just heard about somebody who, if there's something important to do, they decide that they won't allow themselves to go to the bathroom until they've done it. Oh, gosh. That's a form of accountability, right? because it's like, okay, you've just got to get it done or you're just going to be sitting there with your legs crossed for the next week. Any way that you consistently hold yourself accountable so that you can meet outer expectations, please let me know because I want the ones that are the most popular, but also the ones that are the most ingenious. So let me know. And then we also had a lot of parenting hacks in 541 because nobody can ever have enough parenting hacks. There's just never enough. That is the truth. All right, Gretch, coming up, we're going to talk about more highlights, but first, a spring. Are you a trailblazer, a risk taker, someone with countless tales of epic adventure? Well, I'm not quite there yet, but I'm working on it. Even the boldest among us started small, daring themselves to reach greater goals each day. If you're looking to take on a challenge like that, the Defender is too. It's a vehicle built for those capable of great things, whether you're charting new territory or just escaping the city for the weekend. 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They have 100% organic cotton sweaters. They have premium denim with stretch for all-day comfort, luxury cotton cashmere blends that's perfect for the changing season. It's everything you need for a wardrobe that actually lasts. Refresh your wardrobe with Quince. Go to quince.com slash Gretchen for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's quince.com slash Gretchen to get free shipping and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash Gretchen. Okay, Gretchen, we're back. We're going to talk about highlights for us of the year. Why don't you start us off here? Well, one I mentioned already and was the Little Happier episode where I read the obituary that you and I and our mother wrote for our father. That was very meaningful. I've listened to it many, many times. We've read it so many times now. I've listened to it so many times. Gretchen, you know, after Grandma Craft died, I did a eulogy at her funeral, and dad would listen to it over and over again. And I was struck by it and I didn't understand it. Of course, now we understand that impulse so well. Yeah. Now it's a good example of how, as time goes by, many things become clearer. In happier news, my book Secrets of Adulthood was published. I love Secrets of Adulthood. I love an aphorism. So super fun for me to have some time to put some of my favorite aphorisms out into the world and to talk about aphorisms with people. That was super fun. Yeah. Another definite highlight was talking to Liz Gilbert about her new book, All the Way to the River. That was episode 557. If you haven't read it, it is absolutely gripping. Yeah. Same day book for sure. Yeah, absolutely. My husband, Jamie, and I took our daughter, Eleanor, back to college for her sophomore year. So we did some college drop-off hacks in episode 551. Again, empty nest related material. So keep it coming. Great. Another highlight was you launched since you asked your podcast with Lori Gottlieb where you give advice. And we did a very special episode with Lori number 560. And our topic was what secrets your therapist wish they could tell you. Yes. And that was so fun talking to Lori about because she is a therapist. She is talking to her about therapist secrets. What's in their head. And it was super fun to launch since you asked that advice podcast. And Alyssa, you launched something too. You launched your Substack in January. So it's been going now and you sort of keep adding bells and whistles, it seems. Yes. Now we have, you know, slow reads, you know, inspired by Simon Hazel of writing books. We do a thing where Sarah and I go live on Substack and just work as if nobody's there live. That's been really interesting. We also do the first five where you can send us the first five pages of your script and we analyze them. We pick a script once a month. We have Zoom hangouts for speaking of accountability to get work done. So yeah, we're really making it a whole community over there, Gretch, which your word this year is neighbor. And I think it's very neighborly there over on Substack. Yeah, yeah. It's Liz and Sarah's neighborhood for sure. Exactly. So anyway, if anybody's interested, it's Happier in Hollywood on Substack. And then we got some listeners sent in their favorite moments from the previous year. And this one was from Abby. She wrote, the One Hard Thing episode really rattled me in a good way. You were both so sincere and honestly loving in your approach. I have listened and re-listened a few times and one day will hopefully find the courage to tackle my one hard thing. Thank you for being patient with me. So this was very special episode 550, where we talked about sometimes to be happier, there's just one big thing that you need to do, one big hard thing. And this was the episode where we talked about how to identify that and sort of ideas for getting started. And then in episode 558, listeners shared the one hard thing that they had tackled and kind of what the consequences were. So that was good to hear that that resonated with Abby. Yes. And Susan said, I love your year list. I think it would be neat to hear you go back to the first year list that you two ever did and see how much your goals have changed since then. And Gretchen we checked and we been doing these since 2018 so we started with 18 items in 2018 now we up to 26 items But Liz I think that this is a great idea Maybe we should do this the next time we together Like I have all my lists in one place. We should just review them. I think that's, it's kind of a look back, look forward. I mean, we could wait until 2028 and do it for the decade, but I kind of want to do it right away. I think it would be really interesting to see the patterns, like what's been on it, what's fallen off, what we've completed and what we never did complete. I think that's a great idea. Yes. I'm sure, as we talked about earlier, entertaining more would be probably there in 2018 for both of us. Making photo albums. Meg said, I don't think this has been a topic for a while, but I constantly find your moderator versus abstainer framework useful and would love a deeper dive. Well, I love to talk about moderators versus abstainers. This is the idea that for some people, it's easier to give up a temptation altogether than to indulge in moderation. This is why Elizabeth had to declare herself free from French fries because she couldn't just have a few French fries. This is why I had to quit sugar because I had such a powerful sweet tooth. But then some people do very well having one square of fine chocolate or just a few French fries. So Meg, maybe we'll talk about that again soon. I love talking about moderators versus abstainers. Yes. That's what Julie said, oh, I really appreciated the episode about arriving just on time. And this was for introverts who perhaps feel self-conscious about going into a party or something. Yeah. She said, I've been so much better at arriving on time and it felt more like I belong in the room and at the start of a discussion rather than feeling even more awkward and anxious about trying to sneak my way into a conversation. Yeah. Now, this I feel like is a little bit counterintuitive. So it's good to hear that was useful. Sue wrote, Your Say Yes to the Holidays episode in November. This phrase immediately clicked with me. I decided to enjoy the season intentionally rather than my usual habit of just floating through the holidays, making no real effort to enjoy them. Using your Deck the Halls bingo card, I had a ball exploring my favorite holiday movies, childhood treats, etc. Oh, that's so fun. We had so much fun making that bingo card. Trudy says, Love anything about whimsy slash disproportionate joy and was very touched by all the comments and guidance about grief. And she says, congratulations. Here's to many more. So yeah, there's that whimsy again, Gretchen, and the grief discussion. And disproportionate joy, which is actually something you and Sarah talk about in Happier in Hollywood. The idea that some things just give you disproportionate joy. Yes. And listeners will write in and tell us what's given them disproportionate joy. Yeah. Melanie said, I've been with y'all since the beginning. I love Happier so much. Thank you, ladies for all your dedication. The days are long, but the years are short. I say it all the time, and my husband now does too. Also, that when you're looking for something, look really hard where you think the thing is. It has been so successful for me and others. It is bunkers how often this is true. And just if you have not heard this hack, if you cannot find something, go to the place where you think that thing should be. Like, you thought those keys should be in your backpack, but they're not there. Really, really, really look in your backpack. And a lot of times they're in your backpack. We just panic and start looking all over the house. So anyway, that's good to know that hack works. And it's so nice. Thank you for being with us since the beginning. That is so nice to hear. Yes. And finally, Muriel says, I love all the live segments, live from Elizabeth's Clutter Clearing, from the reading retreat, or your recordings from England, or when you did an episode that was recording how you plan an episode. That's what we were referring to earlier. And yeah, we love those off-the-cuff live segments. Yeah, those voice memos are really fun to do. Well, everybody, thank you for listening. This podcast is such an engine of happiness for you and me, Elizabeth. It's so wonderful to have all these people thinking and talking about happiness alongside us. Yes, it makes me happier every day. And if you would like to do something nice for us in honor of our 11th anniversary. No pressure. But if you give us five stars, that is a huge help. If you give us a review, that is also a huge help. Because when people look up a podcast, they often look to see the reviews and the ratings. Or even better, if you recommend the show to a friend, like if you would text it to a friend right this minute, that is a huge help. We've talked to so many people, and it seems like that is how most people discover the show, is through word of mouth. That's how I discover podcasts. Yeah, me too. Now, at the end of every episode, I've sort of fallen into the habit of having a rhyming reminder. Maybe that's a little bit of whimsy. I don't remember how I started that. But Bonnie sent in this. She wrote, I was listening to Happier with Gretchen Rubin in the shower recently and ran out of podcast before I ran out of hot water. As always, Gretchen ended with a rhyming reminder, which started me thinking about what sort of rhyming reminder I could create. Here's what I came up with. Two sisters named Gretchen and Liz jumped into the podcasting biz. You don't know what you're missing, so give them a listen to find out what happiness is. How great is that? Thank you, Bonnie. I love that. She writes, my sister, daughter, daughter-in-law, and I have been doing our own joint happiness project for the past few years and always enjoy going through our list of annual goals and discussing our one-word theme. That's wonderful. Well, Bonnie, thank you for that. Yes. And finally, Gretchen, no demerit this week. Yeah. Can't have a demerit on our 11th anniversary, but we have a huge gold star for our executive producer, Chuck Reed, who, you know, has endless patience, is a perfectionist. Yes. And a delight in every way. Yes, yes. The corgis barking, the sirens going off, us saying like, us saying um. Our technical difficulties. Technical difficulties. the microphones adjust themselves. We don't understand it. Not being able to find the link. Yes. Chuck. Thank you, Chuck. Yes. Welcome. Thank you. And happy anniversary from other friend of the pod, Amanda. Thank you, Amanda. Thank you, Amanda. One of my best friends in the world. Yes. And thank you listeners. This is amazing. We love completists. All of you completists. Thank you for listening to every episode. People who have listened from the beginning, even if you haven't listened to every episode. We love the people who were there from the beginning. And we love the person who just started listening last week. You're never behind. Jump in where you are. There is no homework. Just listen as you want to. We give you so many gold stars for doing this with us. And the resource for this week on my Substack. I have a Substack newsletter, too. It's called Secrets of Adulthood. I share my everyday observations that shape how we can make our lives happier. It's my observations about human nature. In March, I am so excited to announce I will be doing a month-long exploration of color. This is my color pilgrimage. Not all of it, but part of it. Finally, I'm doing something with it. So this is an exclusive subscription for paid subscribers. You'll get a series of short essays about color, which is the most fascinating subject in the world. So if you haven't thinking about subscribing or upgrading, this is a fun time. You can find out all about it if you go to secretsofadulthood.substack.com. That is my sub stack. And of course, Alyssa has her sub stack, Happier in Hollywood. And Alyssa, what are we reading? I am reading The All-Girl Filling Station's Last Reunion by Fanny Flagg. And I am reading Homecoming by Cynthia Boyd. And that's it for this episode of Happier. It's episode 575. If you're looking for any of the links to anything that we talked about, thank you for listening. Keep listening as we head into year 12. Listen, I need to look up what's our material for year 12. I'm curious to know. Yes. Thank you to our executive producer, Chuck Reed, and everyone at Lemonada. And here's another Remy reminder. If you like the show, tell others you know. Until next week, I'm Elizabeth Kraft. And I'm Gretchen Rubin. Thanks for joining us. Onward and upward. Elizabeth, I just looked it up and it turns out the 12th anniversary is silk or linen. There feels like there's a lot of possibilities with silk or linen. Yes, a nice silk pillowcase would be a good gift. Okay, I'm making it out. From the Onward Project. Hi, Gretchen, Craig Robinson, and my little sister Michelle here. We host a new podcast called IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson. We know you're the queen of giving advice, so we wanted to get a few tips from you. You know, Gretchen, a lot of our listeners are going through some major life changes. What advice do you have for folks who are trying to stay grounded in the midst of major life transitions? Craig and Michelle, I am so happy to be talking to you. Here are a few questions that might help us gain perspective. So consider questions like this. What activities take up my time but are not particularly useful or stimulating for me? Do I spend a lot of time on something that's important to someone else but is not very important to me? If I could magically change one habit in my life, what would I choose? And here's a question. Would I like to have more time in solitude, restorative solitude, or would I like to have more time with friends? You know, just thinking about questions like this can help us start to figure out how we might make our lives happier. With greater self-knowledge, we're better able to make hard decisions that reflect ourselves, our own nature, our own interests, our own values. In my own case, I have found that the more my life reflects my nature, the happier I get, and the more grounded I feel when I'm going through a period of major change or transition. For more great advice, search for I Am O with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson wherever you get podcasts. You can listen to Issa Rae on letting go of certain friendships. Kiki Palmer on why disappointment is actually the key to career success. Seth and Lauren Rogan on caring for aging parents, and so many more.