Wuthering Heights | Hypnotic Bedtime Story For Sleep

hi everyone i'm jessica porter and welcome back to sleep magic a podcast where i help you find the magic of your own mind helping you to sleep better and live better thank you everybody for being here i haven't been in the booth for a while and it's always so good to come back and feel connected to this whole community that we're creating i normally give a bunch of shout outs or i often give a bunch of shout outs at one time but i'm going to concentrate on one tonight. This is from someone named Beth. Dear Jessica, about five or six years ago, I was in a really dark place, dealing with deep depression, anxiety, and living in a stressful situation with my kids and my ex. I struggled to sleep and felt like I was just trying to escape my reality. Then I found your podcast, and it was like a turning point. Your soothing voice helped me not only sleep, but also become more spiritually awakened and grounded. Over time, you helped me get sober, choose college, and find a path to independence. Now I have my own home, I'm working my dream job as a vet nurse, and I have a wonderful partner and a loving family environment. Wow. That's me saying wow. It's not in the letter. But she goes on. my sons are named Jackson and Mason they're nine and seven and they request sleep magic every night and even my boyfriend and I end our nights cuddled up falling asleep to your voice it's like you become a part of our family's nightly routine wow thank you Beth wow I read that not only because it's very powerful for people to hear how powerful hypnosis is and the turnaround that you've done is really beautiful and remarkable. But I also read it because it's a testament to using our own minds in positive ways. Like we have minds and they're just ticking away all day and rarely do we actually learn the principles of our minds or how to apply our minds in ways that work for us. I mean, yeah, here and there we pick up little tips, but with hypnosis, we're actually going down to this slowed down mind that you can aim and apply and use. And it grows things and creates things that are positive. so well done Beth and we are all capable of that turning point in ourselves you Beth chose that as a turning point and used these tools to support you so thank you for letting us know congratulations on the turnaround your life sounds beautiful and good night tonight to Jackson Mason you and your boyfriend. All right, if you have a story to tell us, you can reach out on the socials, on the Sleepiest app, or write me on my website. Thank you so much for listening, everyone, and for subscribing. Before we begin, our only ad break, which makes this magic possible. To listen ad-free, follow the link in the show notes. Hey there, Sleep Magic listeners. I want to share a unique bedtime podcast with you that can be a perfect partner to what we do here. It's called I Can't Sleep, hosted by Benjamin Boaster. In this podcast, Benjamin reads Wikipedia articles in his incredibly calming voice, designed to gently lull you into a peaceful slumber. He covers a whole range of subjects you just might enjoy, like comets, cicadas, and my personal favorite, Canada. These topics are just engaging enough to distract your mind from the stresses of the day, but boring enough to send you to sleep, making it a great option for when you want to mix up your bedtime listening. So if you enjoy what we do here at Sleep Magic and are looking for another soothing option to help you unwind, I highly recommend checking out I Can't Sleep. Follow the I Can't Sleep podcast now and get ready to wind down and relax with Benjamin. Find I Can't Sleep wherever you listen to podcasts. Tonight, Wuthering Heights. Well, we're revisiting Wuthering Heights right now for two reasons. First of all, we're coming up on Valentine's Day. and this is considered one of English literature's greatest, most tragic love stories. And second, it's coming out in movie form on the 14th, making it the fifth full-length feature version of it in the English language, although it's also been made into TV series a number of times. We seem to be as obsessed with Wuthering Heights as Heathcliff is with Catherine. As romantic as this novel is, written by 28-year-old Emily Bronte, about whom there is no evidence that she had ever been in love, and in fact, rarely socialized, Wuthering Heights is more of a cautionary tale, I think, really. although it does describe the powerful pull that one soul can have on another and the pain and longing that can be caused when that soul connection is denied it also shows us how incredibly dysfunctional we can get when we don't get what we want or don't control our fates and in the case of Heathcliff that involves generational revenge and cruelty and being haunted. So yeah, I guess the takeaway is, you know, beware falling in love with your foster sister. I know, I'm cynical. I'm sorry. But it's a great read. So tonight I'll be reading from chapter nine, in which Catherine explains her love of Heathcliff to Nellie and the conflict she feels about it. And as always, we will start with deep relaxation, and you can just let go and allow Emily Bronte's romantic prose unfold in you. Now, get yourself into a safe and comfortable position, and let's begin. Allow your eyes to close easily and gently. As you settle back in to your body, coming back home to your consciousness, as you feel your body sink into the bed. good now gently bring your awareness to your breath and you don't need to do anything fancy with your breath but you're simply focusing on it just for a moment returning to this metronome that's built into your body the breath is always here always available to focus you and bring you home. As you bring your awareness now up into your eyelids, at first, I'd like you to imagine that your eyelids are feeling sleepy, heavy, so relaxed. And as you imagine that your eyelids are feeling heavy and relaxed, they are starting to feel heavier and more relaxed. Because where the imagination goes, the body follows. and now I'd like you to imagine that your eyelids are so relaxed that they simply will not open and I know that's a silly suggestion but we're pretending so accepting the suggestion that your eyelids are so relaxed they will not open I'd like you to test your eyes now by wiggling your eyebrows. Just give them a little tug as your eyes remain closed. Good. Now, this lovely heaviness, this lovely relaxation around your eyes, let's imagine that it's spilling back into your head. let's imagine it's moving spilling releasing relaxation into your brain and you notice that your head is becoming heavier on the pillow as your brain fills and is taken over by this lovely, warm, relaxed feeling. So that now your brain is soaking in relaxation as your head gets even heavier. An all-mental tension. has disappeared. As the muscles of your face are softening and relaxing. Everyone in your world is going to sleep around now. Everyone is letting go of the dance the performance the roles that we play everyone has done their best today and we're all letting go so your face is letting go As the relaxation moves down into your neck and your shoulders, let's imagine your shoulders are becoming soft and relaxed, almost like they're melting into the bed. and as your shoulders are relaxing all of the responsibilities you carry on those shoulders have fallen to the floor because this is your time and everyone gets this time alone at night it's a selfish time and everyone is being selfish as they sleep not selfish like greedy or cruel just self-possessed self-contained inward-facing so it's okay to let go of those responsibilities because you will pick any or all of them up tomorrow but for now you're just enjoying the relaxation as it moves down your arms and your arms are becoming heavy on the bed And the relaxation moves down into your hands into your fingers They too are feeling heavy and relaxed If you've been making fists, let your hands open and let go. as any tension you may have picked up today moves down out through your palms out through your fingers as you bring your awareness to any sounds that may be going on around you just notice them because as you go deeper and deeper into relaxation those sounds will simply move through you taking you even deeper and deeper so let those sounds move through you right now as you go deeper and the sound of my voice is also taking you deeper and Emily Bronte's words will take you deeper as you drift and float and dream tonight experiencing your own personal journey at a certain point you will simply let go and that's not something you're in control of. It simply happens as you relax, going deeper and deeper. As we imagine the relaxation moving down inside your body now. Let's imagine a mist of relaxation. Let's make it blue tonight. A lovely blue mist of relaxation moving down into your chest. Filling your chest cavity. Imagine that mist circulating in your chest, that cool blue mist softening, releasing, and relaxing your inner world. Cooling you off from the inside out. as the mist moves down deeper in your torso down deep now into your belly that beautiful cool blue mist softening and relaxing and easing your whole inner being as your pelvis feels heavy on the bed and the muscles of your back are softening and relaxing and letting go as the relaxation moves down into your legs now moving down as your legs become heavy, your thighs feel nice and heavy on the bed. The day is done, and your legs are softening and relaxing, and beginning this mini vacation. as the relaxation moves down through your knees down deep into your calves through your ankles into your feet and your legs are feeling nice and heavy nice and comfortable on the bed chapter nine i went into the kitchen and sat down to lull my little lamb to sleep heathcliff as i thought walked through to the barn it turned out afterwards that he only got as far as the other side of the settle when he flung himself on a bench by the wall, removed from the fire, and remained silent. I was rocking Hairton on my knee and humming a song when Miss Cathy, who had listened to the hubbub from her room, put her head in and whispered, Are you alone, Nellie? Yes, miss, I replied. She entered and approached the hearth. I, supposing she was going to say something, looked up. The expression of her face seemed disturbed and anxious. her lips were half asunder as if she meant to speak and she drew a breath but it escaped in a sigh instead of a sentence i resumed my song not having forgotten her recent behavior where's heathcliff she said interrupting me about his work in the stable was my answer he did not contradict me perhaps he had fallen into a doze there followed another long pause during which I perceived a drop or two trickle from Catherine's cheek to the flags is she sorry for her shameful conduct I ask myself that will be a novelty but she may come to the point as she will i shan't help her no she felt small trouble regarding any subject save her own concerns oh dear she cried at last i'm very unhappy a pity observed i you're hard to please so many friends and so few cares and can't make yourself content nally will you keep a secret for me she pursued kneeling down by me and lifting her winsome eyes to my face with that sort of look which turns off bad temper even when one has all the right in the world to indulge it is it worth keeping i inquired less sulkily yes and it worries me and i must let it out. I want to know what I should do. Today, Edgar Linton has asked me to marry him, and I've given him an answer. Now, before I tell you whether it was a consent or denial, you tell me which it ought to have been. Really, Miss Catherine, how can I know? I replied. To be sure, considering the exhibition you performed in his presence this afternoon, I might say it would be wise to refuse him. Since he asked you after that, he must either be hopelessly stupid or a venturesome fool. If you talk so, I won't tell you anymore, she returned, peevishly rising to her feet. I accepted him, Nellie. Be quick and say whether I was wrong. You accepted him? Then what good is it discussing the matter? You have pledged your word and cannot retract. But say whether I should have done so. Do, she exclaimed in an irritated tone, chafing her hands together and frowning. There are many things to be considered before that question can be answered properly, I said sententiously. First and foremost, do you love Mr. Edgar? Who can help it? Of course I do, she answered. Then I put her through the following catechism. For a girl of 22, it was not injudicious. Why do you love him, Miss Kathy? Nonsense, I do. That's sufficient. By no means. You must say why. Well, because he's handsome, and pleasant to be with. Bad, was my commentary. And because he's young and cheerful, bad still. And because he loves me, indifferent coming here. And he will be rich, and I shall like to be the greatest woman of the neighborhood, and I shall be proud of having such a husband. worst of all and now say how do you love him as everybody does you're silly Nellie not at all answer I love the ground under his feet and the air over his head and everything he touches and every word he says I love all his looks and all his actions and him entirely and altogether there now and why nay you are making a jest of it it is exceedingly ill-natured it's no jest to me said the young lady scowling and turning her face to the fire i'm very far from jesting miss i replied you love mr edgar because he is handsome and young and cheerful and rich and loves you the last however goes for nothing you would love him without that probably and with it you wouldn't unless he possessed the four former attractions no to be sure not i should only pity him hate him perhaps if he were ugly and a clown but there are several other handsome rich young men in the world, handsomer, possibly, and richer than he is, what should hinder you from loving them? If there be any there out of my way, I've seen none like Edgar. You may see some, and he won't always be handsome and young, and may not always be rich. He is now, and I have only to do with the present. I wish you would speak rationally. Well, that settles it. If you only have to do with the present, marry Mr. Linton. I don't want your permission for that. I shall marry him. And yet you have not told me whether I'm right. Perfectly right, if people be right to marry only for the present. And now, let us hear what you are unhappy about. Your brother will be pleased. The old lady and gentleman will not object, I think. You will escape from a disorderly, comfortless home into a wealthy respectable one and you love edgar and edgar loves you all seems smooth and easy where is the obstacle here and here replied catherine striking one hand on her forehead and the other on her breast in whichever place the soul lives in my soul and in my heart I'm convinced I'm wrong that's very strange I cannot make it out it's my secret but if you will not mock me I'll explain it I can't do it distinctly but I'll give you a feeling of how I feel she seated herself by me again her countenance grew sadder and graver and her clasped hands trembled Nellie, do you ever dream strange dreams? she said suddenly after some minute's reflection yes, now and then I answered and so do I I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after and changed my ideas. They gone through me and through me like wine through water and altered the color of my mind And this is one, I'm going to tell it, but take care not to smile at any part of it. Oh, don't, Miss Catherine, I cried. We're dismal enough without conjuring up ghosts and visions to perplexes. Come, come, be merry and like yourself. Look at little Herden. He's dreaming nothing dreary. How sweetly he smiles in his sleep. Yes, and how sweetly his father curses in his solitude. You remember him, I dare say, when he was just such another as that chubby thing, nearly as young and innocent. However, Nellie, I shall oblige you to listen. it's not long and I've no power to be married tonight I won't hear it I won't hear it I repeated hastily I was superstitious about dreams then and am still and Catherine had an unusual gloom in her aspect that made me dread something from which I might shape a prophecy and foresee a fearful catastrophe she was vexed but she did not proceed apparently taking up another subject she recommenced in a short time if i were in heaven nelly i should be extremely miserable because you are not fit to go there i answered all sinners would be miserable in heaven but it is not for that i dreamt once that I was there. I tell you I won't hearken to your dreams, Miss Catherine. I'll go to bed. I interrupted again. She laughed and held me down, for I made a motion to leave my chair. This is nothing, cried she. I was only going to say that heaven did not seem to be my home, and I broke my heart with weeping to come back to earth, and the angels were so angry that they flung me out in the middle of the heath on the top of Wuthering Heights, where I woke sobbing for joy. That will do to explain my secret as well as the other. I've no more business to marry Edgar Linton than I have to be in heaven. And if the wicked man in there had not brought Heathcliff so low, I shouldn't have thought of it. it would degrade me to marry Heathcliff now so he shall never know how I love him and that not because he's handsome Nellie but because he's more myself than I am whatever our souls are made of his and mine are the same and Linton's is as different as a moonbeam from lightning or frost from fire. Ere this speech ended, I became sensible of Heathcliff's presence. Having noticed a slight movement, I turned my head and saw him rise from the bench and steal out noiselessly. He had listened till he heard Catherine say it would degrade her to marry him, and then he stayed to hear no further. My companion, sitting on the ground, was prevented by the back of the settle from remarking his presence or departure. But I started and bade her hush. Why? she asked, gazing nervously around. Joseph is here, I answered, catching opportunely the roll of his cartwheels up the road, and Heathcliff will come in with him. I'm not sure whether he were not at the door this moment. He couldn't overhear me at the door, said she. Give me Hairton while you get the supper, and when it is ready, ask me to sup with you. I want to cheat my uncomfortable conscience and be convinced that Heathcliff has no notion of these things. he has not has he he does not know what being in love is i see no reason that he should not know as well as you i returned and if you are his choice he'll be the most unfortunate creature that ever was born as soon as you become mrs linton he loses a friend and love and all have you considered how you'll bear the separation and how he'll bear to be quite deserted in the world because miss catherine he quite deserted we separated she exclaimed with an accent of indignation who is to separate us pray every linton on the face of the earth might melt into nothing before I could consent to forsake Heathcliff. Oh, that's not what I intend. That's not what I mean. I shouldn't be Mrs. Linton were such a price demanded. He'll be as much to me as he has been all his lifetime. Edgar must shake off his antipathy and tolerate him at least. He will when he learns my true feelings towards him. nelly i see now you think me a selfish wretch but did it never strike you that if heathcliff and i married we should be beggars whereas if i marry linton i can aid heathcliff to rise and place him out of my brother's power with your husband's money miss catherine i asked you'll find him not so pliable as you calculate upon, and though I'm hardly a judge, I think that's the worst motive you've given me yet for being the wife of young Linton. It is not, retorted she, it is the best. The others were the satisfaction of my whims, and for Edgar's sake too, to satisfy him. This is for the sake of one who comprehends in his person my feelings to Edgar and myself. I cannot express it, but surely you and everybody have a notion that there is or should be an existence of yours beyond you. What were the use of my creation if I were entirely contained here? My great miseries in this world have been Heathcliff's miseries, and I watched and I felt each from the beginning. my great thought in living is himself if all else perished and he remained I should still continue to be and if all else remained and he were annihilated the universe would turn to a mighty stranger I should not seem a part of it my love for Linton is like the foliage in the woods time will change it I'm well aware as winter changes the trees my love for Heathcliff resembles the eternal rocks beneath a source of little visible delight but necessary Nally I am Heathcliff he's always always in my mind not as a pleasure any more than i'm always a pleasure to myself but as my own being so don't talk of our separation again it is impracticable and she paused and hid her face in the folds of my gown but i jerked it forcibly away i was out of patience with her folly. If I can make any sense of your nonsense, miss, I said, it only goes to convince me that you are ignorant of the duties you undertake in marrying, or else that you are a wicked, unprincipled girl. But trouble me no more with secrets. I'll not promise to keep them. You'll keep that? she asked eagerly. No, I'll not promise, I repeated. she was about to insist when the entrance of joseph finished our conversation and catherine removed her seat to a corner and nursed harriton while i made the supper after it cooked my fellow servant and i began to quarrel who should carry some to mr hindley and we didn't settle it till all was nearly cold then we came to the agreement that we would let him ask if he wanted any for we feared particularly to go into his presence when he had been some time alone and how isn't that now come in from the field be this time demanded the old man looking around for Heathcliff. I'll call him, I replied. He's in the barn, I've no doubt. I went and called, but got no answer. On returning, I whispered to Catherine that he had heard a good part of what she said, I was sure, and told how I saw him quit the kitchen just as she complained of her brother's conduct regarding him. She jumped up in a fine fright, flung Hairton onto the settle, and ran to seek for her friend herself, not taking leisure to consider why she was so flurried or how her talk would have affected him. She was absent such a while that Joseph proposed we should wait no longer. He cunningly conjectured they were staying away in order to avoid hearing his protracted blessing, when his young mistress broke in upon him with a hurried command that he must run down the road and, wherever Heathcliff had rambled, find and make him re-enter directly. I want to speak to him, and I must, before I go upstairs, she said. And the gate is open, he is somewhere out of hearing, for he would not reply, although I shouted at the top of the fold as loud as I could. Joseph objected at first. She was too much in earnest, however, to suffer contradiction, and at last he placed his hat on his head and walked, grumbling forth. Meantime, Catherine paced up and down the floor, exclaiming, I wonder where he is. I wonder where he can be. What did I say, Nellie? I've forgotten. Was he vexed at my bad humor this afternoon? Oh, dear, tell me what I've said to grieve him. I do wish he'd come. I do wish he would. What a noise for nothing, I cried, rather uneasy myself. What a trifle scares you. It's surely no cause of alarm that Heathcliff should take a moonlight saunter on the moors, or even lie too sulky to speak to us in the hayloft. I'll engage. He's lurking there. See if I don't ferret him out. I departed to renew my search its result was disappointment and Joseph's quest ended in the same it was a very dark evening for summer the clouds appeared inclined to thunder and I said we had better all sit down the approaching rain would be certain to bring him home without further trouble. However, Catherine would not be persuaded into tranquility. She kept wandering to and fro, from the gate to the door, in a state of agitation which permitted no repose, and at length took up a permanent situation on one side of the wall near the road where, heedless of my expostulations, and the growling thunder, and the great drops that began to plash around her, she remained, calling at intervals, and then listening, and then crying outright. She beat Hairton or any child at a good, passionate fit of crying. About midnight, while we still sat up, the storm came rattling over the heights in full fury. There was a violent wind, as well as thunder, and either one or the other split a tree off at the corner of the building. A huge bough fell across the roof and knocked down a portion of the east chimney stack, sending a clatter of stones and soot into the kitchen fire. We thought a bolt had fallen in the middle of us and Joseph swung onto his knees beseeching the Lord to remember the patriarchs Noah and Lot and as in former times spare the righteous though he smote the ungodly I felt some sentiment that it must be a judgment on us also. But the uproar passed away in twenty minutes, leaving us all unharmed, excepting Kathy who got thoroughly drenched for her obstinacy in refusing to take shelter and standing bonnetless and shawless to catch as much water as she could with her hair and clothes she came in and lay down on the settle all soaked as she was turning her face to the back and putting her hands before it well miss I exclaimed touching her shoulder you're not bent on getting your death are you do you know what o'clock it is half past twelve come come to bed there's no use waiting any longer on that foolish boy. He'll be gone to Gimmerton, and he'll stay there now. He guesses we shouldn't wait for him until this late hour. At least he guesses that only Mr. Hindley would be up, and he'd rather avoid having the door open by the master. I, having vainly begged the willful girl to rise and remove her wet things, left her shivering and betook myself to bed with little Hairton who slept as fast as if everyone had been sleeping around him. I heard Joseph read on a while afterwards. Then I distinguished his slow step on the ladder. And then I dropped asleep. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Amen. Thank you. Thank you. Amen. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.