A Wild Summer Mailbag

Okay, welcome to the ringer fantasy football show my name is Danny Hype today joined by Danny killing crack world back in today we're doing a mail bag baby we record is May 7th So if something happened between now and whenever this is running, that's why we didn't talk about it. We're core this base seventh. Uh, I think you guys have come to my wedding between now and this recording in this hell of a time. Absolute blast. I'm so sorry for what I did, but it was a great night. Well, like, does anyone have any objections and Craig just shot his hand up? It was like, Jackie, you have one last chance. Okay. We're going to go into. We play, play the take point, take purge horns, right? As you're walking down the aisle, snap is now a good time. Help the Chris Sims. Okay. So we're going to go through a bunch of just great emails we've gotten that we just didn't have time to read. And I want to start with one that really spoke to my heart. I don't know if one of you guys wants to read this or not, but I this is from. Well, first of all, it's Roman, but there's an I in it. R-O-M-A-I-N. Is it Romain or is it Roman? R-O-A-R-O-A. R-O-M-A-I-N. Oh, A-I-N. Romain might be Romain. I mean, Romain. And it was great email. Romain. Arbor. So the subject line was cognitive push ups. And Romans, Romain's breakfast was drip coffee, yogurt, granola and whatever fruit is best in season right now. It's orange. Fuck yeah. Nice. Blood orange for breakfast is pretty great. That's badass. That's also the best name fruit. Yeah. It's kind of badass. Yeah. Blood orange. That's sick. Worse named fruit, watermelon. OK. What about cumquat? That's top five. I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah. Where are you coming from? What is a fucking cumquat? I don't know. It's a citrus fruit. You want a melon that's full of water? No. Sounds horrible. Ironically, you could call it watermelon. It should be called the blood melon. Yeah. Oh, ironically. Anyway. So Roman says this is a little out of left field, but here we go. There was a few seconds of hesitation on a recent episode where Haifa's was trying to recall what the sister's name was before from arrest of development before realizing it was Lindsay Bluth. And Roman says as a guy a little bit older than you and in the spirit of that great episode, way back when you were earnestly discussing how to try to move more and be physically active as you enter your thirties. Let me tell you if it's these little long pause pauses when doing pop culture recalls are also a sign of age on the cognitive side. Yeah, that's tough. And they need to be fought back as hard as back. Right. This speaks to me. Lord knows my recall is not what it used to be. Yes. The recall is like there is. There's pills for that, D.K. Exactly. Recall, Craig. So Roman says we have this rule with friends from college that whenever we meet or in discussion at dinner and there's a Lindsay Bluth, Fugue, K moment happens where someone can't recall something. He's like, you fucking. I'm a Fugue. Please say her full name. Lindsay Bluth, Fugue, K. So he says whenever someone clearly has a much slower reaction time that is acceptable about in a universally beloved cultural property, we stop whatever it is that we are doing and we immediately start a round of random recall bits. And every player takes a turn asking a random question. And the rest of the table is to reply as fast as possible. And each correct response scores a point. And the person with the fewest points for that round has to pay for lunch. Wow. It's a pretty fun idea. So like an impromptu quiz show. And so Roman says it's the equivalent of cognitive push ups. And in the quest to age gracefully, we are adhering to it almost more religiously than 10,000 steps a day. There's always quite the scene when we are doing it with our spouses or there or at a couple's dinner and then serious conversations broken because someone took an extra second to remember the name John Edwards. And then suddenly all the boys break into an immediate contest of what's the name of the actor playing Nate 90210? Who is right back for the English football team in 2002? What is the real name of Goose and Top Gun? And we're just screaming. And our spouses think real name of Goose and Top Gun. I don't know that. Oh, I don't know that. I know Maverick's name. The name's Goose. What's Maverick's name? Pete Mitchell. Fuck. I'm buying lunch. So anyone they always like, look, we're trying to fight off Alzheimer's. You're fighting since 20 years. So he says I thought this routine would be up your alley. I think this is a great role. His name was Lieutenant Nick Bradshaw. I've never heard that before in my life. But I think of him every time I sing, goodness gracious, great balls of fire. Oh, yeah. This is like that game. Take me to batter lose me forever. That was good. You know the game where you like somebody drops tennis balls and you just have to grab them? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's possible. This is like that, but mentally. It's so good. So I said this to you guys and did you guys all? How many questions did you prepare? I have four. I came up with three. I did I missed the part where it was pop culture. So I just came up with three quiz questions. Oh, that's but we can still do that. I think. But there are all things that require recall. I think so. Yes. OK, I have four. Yes. Yes. OK, so we're just going to go. And so one person goes, the other person can just shout it out. Are we just going to go one? It's going to be two against one, because I think we all looked up the answers on these, right? I I know the answers to the one I wrote. Yes, same. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't answer the only question that you're answering. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that would be crazy. That would be what Haifetz does every each and every week. Right, right. If you want that, just listen to our Monday episode during the season. Fucking kill you. Oh, my God. Are we going? Are we each going to read one and go in order? We all going to do. Yeah, yeah, we'll go in order. You can start, Craig, but we'll go one, two, three, one, two, three. All right, ready? But yeah, OK. Who was the starting quarterback for the Bears in the 2007 Super Bowl against the Colts? Rex Grossman. What the fuck? I also have one from that Super Bowl. Oh, really? I know Lekker. I literally was going to say name a running back from the Colts Bears Super Bowl. Andrew James. No, no. Fuck. Running back. Colts Bears had a committee for the Colts. What was a rookie? Oh, wait, the Colts. Was it Donald Brown? Before Donald Brown. God damn it, Donald. God damn it, Donald. No, it was before that guy. No, you said no Edger and James. No, these two guys replaced Edger and James. He went to Arizona. And I think he got the Russian record in Arizona. Bradshaw? No, he didn't. That's a mod Bradshaw on the Giants. He didn't write what to do if no one can get it, which is really sad. Matt Forte. No. Before Matt Forte. We're going to be here a while. I might just tell you. It was Joseph Adai and Dominic Rhodes. And then Thomas Jones was the Bear Starter. And then Cedric Benson got like two carries. How do we both pick the same Super Bowl? That's crazy. All right, DK. Weird. This one's different, a little bit different, but name the actors who played James Bond in order. Oh, Christ. Sean Connery. No, no, no, no, no. He's not first. I think he was. Yeah. Sean Connery was the first James Bond. Yeah. According to the research that he did, which was very limited. There were not there bonds before that. There's, there's bonds after him that were very short lived. There was one guy I'm never going to name, name something that did one episode. He didn't care. I mean, Daniel Craig, Pierce Brosnan, Sean Connery, and then the rest are tough. Well, Roger Moore was Roger Moore did a lot. Yeah. Yeah. There's one that starts with a T. Wasn't there a guy who did literally one? Yes, this guy would be David Niven. Not Niven, which you never would have got. There's also a guy named George Lazenby. Oh, George Lazenby. Yeah. The one that you're missing is starts with a T. His name starts with a T. I don't know. A very famous actor has this first name now. Big name. Big. Timothy. Yes. Yes. Timothy. Damn. Nice. You know your James Bond. Boom. So yeah, Sean Connery, David Niven, George Lazenby, Roger Moore and seven films. Timothy Dalton and two Pierce Brosnan for Daniel Craig five. That's a good question. Okay. Craig, you're up. Who is Ethan Hawke married to? Is it Kate Winslet? No. The actress from the Ninja, the samurai movie. What is it? Sorry, not samurai movie. This is good. Uma Thurman? Yeah. Uma Thurman. No shit. I didn't know that. Yeah. You ever seen Maya Hawke? She looks exactly like Uma Thurman. That makes so much sense now. Wow. That's crazy. Kill Bill is the name of the movie. You created your own. Recall is true. I get it now. Okay. We all like to show house, right? I've never watched it. Oh. I think you like. Yeah, that's fine. I know it's Hugh Laurie. Fine. I'll just say you know, do you remember Tony Sopranos therapist's name? Dude, I have a Sopranos one. Jennifer Melphie. You know the first name? That's crazy. Yeah. Fuck yeah. Dr. I'm watching the Sopranos right now. Dr. Melphie. I give you the first name. Yeah. Jennifer, you know who plays her? What's the actress's name? Dude, I come on. That's not recall. That's Lorraine Brocco. Come on. Oh, okay. Do you want to do my Sopranos one? Yeah. Of course I want you to do your Sopranos one. What are the names of Tony Sopranos two children? AJ and Meadow. Meadow. Nice. Meadow. Yeah. Okay. AJ is Antonio Jr. Oh, yeah. Tony Jr. Good call. I was going to say J.A. because I watched it in the wrong order, but. Fucking weirdo. This is great. This is like cognitive push-ups. I feel like this is good. What are the last? I think you said Antonio, by the way, not Anthony. Well, we'll tell you this later. What do you mean, well, A. Yeah, his name's Anthony. Well, oh, do I say Antonio? Antonio. I was like, oh. My bad, my bad. So obviously my recall is not very good. What are the last three states to be added to the United States? Alaska, Hawaii and. What? Fucking Washington. Nope. Alaska, Hawaii. Hawaii and Alaska. In Arizona. Hawaii and then Alaska and then Arizona. Yeah. D.K. These are less recall and more just trivia. I go to D.K.'s. OK, well, I fucking didn't get the assignment right. Who's the actor played Nate 902 and O. Seem to be the thing. OK. Do you know the answer to that? Because I don't. Who played Nate 902. Oh, no, I never watched 902. But they're older than us. D.K. I was going to ask you, do you remember any of the three. Is President stuff trivia or recall? Craig, which president might I got a president one. Craig and I caught up in a round for like three presidents, dude. Right. Recall. Yeah. If it's like something John Adams did, like I, you know, it's not really recall. Well, OK, this is the one I was going to ask you. You could you don't have to answer it if you think it's stupid. Who are the three presidents who succeeded FDR during and after World War II? Yeah, that's not recall, but I know they are, but like it's kind of recall. Well, it's Harry Truman also succeeded. It's Harry Truman and then Eisenhower Eisenhower and then JFK. Yeah. Good job. Good recall high fits. Yeah. It's got pointed out to me at one point that I don't think we've ever had an instance where all three of us understand the game we're playing, which I think is fair. It was spawned from Lindsay Blue Fugue, but I like that. No, it's I like it though. You're right. I didn't have to remember that. My recall and understanding of the game are both poor. Who played the original Mary Poppins? I don't know her name. Oh, it. She's also in sound and music. Julie Andrews. Nice. No, Dwight Eisenhower. No, D.K. actually did. I don't know how to define how do you define recall? You know what? It was just for God. No, it doesn't have to be pop cold. It has to just be something. It's a good question, but it's like, it's like, I know it when I hear it, but I can't explain it. Exactly. Like, like I was going to ask you, you, you loved house, right? Like me, the show. No, no. Was that with someone else? Like I did. I've never watched house. Not that I recall. Anyway, fuck. Like. Like if I'm like. Like what's the capital of the country of Georgia? That's not recall. That's just trivia. Yeah. But it's more like, what is you? Like, yeah, it's like, what is the name of this character? Mary Poppins is definitely trivia. It needs to be something. You were there for it. It needs to be something. Honestly, I think the premise is like it needs to be something that the average person probably knows, but also it's something that you would have known when you were younger for a reason. Like it's something in the moment you would have. What's the, what's the main car called in cars? Like at some point you knew. Lightning McQueen McQueen. There you go. Right. Right. Yeah. All right. I'm going to put it. All right. Well, I did. I didn't prepare for it. I didn't prepare for it. I didn't prepare for it. I didn't prepare that way. No, it's all right. It's all right. What's the difference between recall and trivia? I'm fucking Google. D.K. is like, how many M&Ms are in this jar? Recall is a cognitive process. How you remember trivia is a type of content. What you remember. So yeah, that makes sense. Like we do during the season when I'm like, how many mosquitoes does it take to kill you at one time? That's not trivia. How many gallons of water in the Atlantic Ocean? Neither trivia. No recall. It's pure guessing. It's like deduction. All right. Well, you know what? We'll keep doing this game. You don't think I like what you're doing though. It's a curveball. Keep doing it. We didn't mention the pictures. Mix it up the pictures. Yeah, that was all right. Okay. Next one here. This is from Josh. Josh. It was all lists. It wasn't even quick. It was like, name six James Bond. Name? Name a woman. He's like, name all 32 NBA mascot. All 30 NBA mascots. That's actually pretty good. I didn't feel that one way. It's just three examples. The whole idea is that it's like wrapping. You're like at dinner and you're like, uh, Julie Andrews, you know, not like, wow, there's Roger Moore. Who else? George Lassenby. We got a fucking fill an hour here. Right. Yeah, that's true. This is from Josh. Josh. My breakfast today was a raisin cinnamon bagel. Who says raisin cinnamon? It's good call. So that is a good one, Josh. Raisin cinnamon bagel. You know what? Sorry, Josh, your email has been cut. Yeah. Fuck this guy. Oh wait, I'm sorry. It gets weirder. It gets weirder. Okay. He says raisin cinnamon bagel with peanut butter, a banana and a hot cup of water. What is this guy? A hot cup of water. I know it's good for you, but come on. What are we talking about? Are you a podcast host? It's a hot, hot ham water. Um, he says just a smack of ham. What are we talking about? This is loopy. So Josh says watery. We were talking like a month ago about hockey names, but we got on this hockey player named punch punch. Right. Right. Punch in black punch in black punch of black. So Josh, says here are some other NHL names that you might find funny. Dick Duff. Okay. Jordan to to. Hmm. Ron tug nut. Tug nut. How is that spelled? Straight out of Shorzy. It's exactly how you talk. Yeah. Tug. No, it's two T's. At the end. Radic pan or pan? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Radic pan or Pam Pam or bet. There's two marks on tug nut. Radic bunk.贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽贽 Yeah, there's a guy who's the world's fastest clapper. And he like claps like this. Well, that's pretty good, Craig. There also was a guy named Happ Day. Happ Happ Day. Baldi cotton. Gump, Worsley. Gump, Gump, Gump, Worsley. What? God damn it, Gump. God damn it. One eyed Frank McGee. Let me guess, he had one eye. Can you guess where he lost it? You've got one eye. He lost it in a hockey game. Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, yeah. He lost it in a charity hockey game. Even better for the kids. Charity hockey game. But the best of all, this guy never made the NHL, but he played junior. There was a guy named. Jim Bob Ghostkeeper. That cannot be his fucking name. Ghostkeeper. Jim Bob Ghostkeeper. Ghostkeeper. Oh, man. Jim Bob Ghostkeeper. There's a there's a reddit thread called name. There's a bracket in 2018 called Name of the Year. And it says Canadian hockey player, Jim Bob Ghostkeeper, is the 2018 name of the year. Jim Bob Ghostkeeper. He beat Dr. Narwhals mating. What? Dr. Narwhals mating. How did he beat that guy? Narwhals mating. Here's the final four. This is fantastic. What am I looking at? Who made this? The final four. Who made all these? The Narwhals? Dr. Narwhals mating versus Delicious Peters. And on the other side, we have Jim Bob Ghostkeeper versus making love, petite fard. The first name is making love. That's cheating. M-A-K-E-N-L-O-V. Wow. Oh, my God. I think Narwhals mating. That was a doctor. Narwhals mating. Wait, did Dr. Narwhals mating? He was a hockey player or these are just people? I see him here. Dr. Narwhals mating, MD. Wait, is he practicing? Family medicine, 25 years of experience, two out of five stars. Not great. That's tough. He's a physician in Springville, California. Wow. Two out of five stars. Should we? That's a calling mate. Not very good. Did I have Dr. Narwhals mating? Dr. Narwhals mating. Did you leave your Narwhals mating? There's another Reddit thread. Today I learned there's a doctor in California named Dr. Narwhals mating. There's some cool names here. There was a one seed that got knocked off. Salami blessing. Delicious Peters. Reverend Dongo Peewee. Reverend. That had to be a reverend. Dongo Peewee. I don't know why, but the reverend really puts it over the top there. Dongo Peewee. Wow. Holy shit. Narwhals. All right. Any other ones, Greg? No, that's about it. Well, wait, there's somebody here named Tuna Altuna. Both spell Tuna. Tuna Altuna. Tuna, Tuna Altuna. Tuna Altuna. That one flows. I like that one. Tuna Altuna. We got any mail here from Jesse? J-Bone. Jesse. Breakfast was a protein, fruit, smoothie, oatmeal, coffee and some box. What the fuck? I got to start screening these breakfasts. Some box. That's what they say. I kind of just mentally skip over the breakfast, but they did read right that. I didn't really read that. What's that mean? Doesn't that mean like you're below your belly button in the Pacific Northwest? That's what's wrong. So he's in that order doing those things. I bet it wasn't in that order. Yeah. In an order that would surprise you. In an order that would particularly surprise you. In a particular order that would surprise you. And then he goes, ass mouth vag. What are you talking about? I don't know what that is. Some Pete Holmes in YouTube sketchy. He's playing Batman. Oh my God. Rachel. All right. Jesse writes, Jesus, I got this guy. This guy. Well, how do you even go on from here? But OK, Jesse writes today was at the local coffee shop doing some studying. The barista calls up matcha, ice lavender, vanilla. And I look up and I think, what an effeminate drink. And then I look over and who do I see? But Greg Warbeck himself grabbing a drink. The fuck? That is a lie. Is it? Yeah, I've never ordered a vanilla. What was it? Vanilla lavender. Matcha ice lavender. No, not me. Oh, how dare you? And that actually sounds interesting, but no, I've never ordered that. Probably had me mistaken with a handsome celebrity. Craig was like, God, what's up with your breath? I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. This is funny. Vanilla. Tiki, that was good. OK. And some box. I just mentally gloss over the breakfast that I read. Oh, my God. OK. This one is from, fuck, I lost your name. I'm sorry. Wait, so did that guy just make up that he saw me in a coffee shop? I think he did, yeah. OK, just for fun. He just wanted to say that. And I thought to myself, what an effeminate drink. What a gay little drink. And I saw Craig. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you guys that I had some box for breakfast. Yeah, I think I got played in that one. Yeah, we get it. Fuck. This guy eats box and thinks drinks match is effeminate. Me thinks one doth protest too much. Yeah, I think you're right. Oh, my God. All right, this one's from Paul. P-Bone. So we were talking about Paulie. Paulie Walnuts. I forgot what we were talking about. We were talking about saving time in weird ways. I think we're talking about the guy who is four days in one day. I forgot what we were talking about. We bring that guy up like once a month and it's not enough. I love that guy. Wait, which guy? Craig's made me love this guy. The guy who's like midnight to 6 a.m. that's day one. Oh, God. 6 a.m. to noon, day two. I'm already doubled ahead of you. I'm living four, so I'm living 28 days a week. 21 day week. I feel like that's your favorite YouTube video, Craig. It's the best. I don't even know who that guy is. I should look into him. Who is he? Craig, I hate to tell you this, but he's a grifter. How dare you? What he said is that. Oh, it's because we were talking about Hulk Hogan when he said Hulk Hogan was like, with a time shift to Japan, I wrestle 400 days a year. Crazy secret to have insane productivity. Ed Milet shares a crazy secret. If you want to be able to work 21 days in a row, then watch this video. Oh my God. So on this note, we got this email from Paul. He says, breakfast today, played a delicious homemade pancakes made in a brand new stainless steel pan, pot of coffee, 24-inch cold brew. Wow. Describing coffee and cold brew is crazy. Describing the pan. Congrats on the pan. That's a nice feeling. New stainless steel pan. That's nice though. You get a new stainless steel pan. That's nice. Sure. The highest level of at home cooking is once you've learned how to actually use a stainless steel pan. Yeah. Because it's not like impossible to clean it. Yeah. Yeah. Where like the chicken won't come off of it and it burns immediately and it just completely ruins it. I have only recently really figured out how to use stainless steel. Yeah. I'm still figuring it out. It's a nightmare. It's all about basically letting it get really hot. And also a little bit of, and like the meat will kind of come off the pan on its own. But also the key is after you pull the meat off and there's like a bunch of like burn shit, adding, taking it off the heat and adding a little bit of water. Yeah. Immediately lifts all that stuff off and you can also make a sauce if you want with it. You got a stew going. You got a stew going. All right. What did Pete want? Oh, he says, Paul. Paul. Yeah, Paul. Dwayne the Rock Johnson pisses in empty water bottles on set and in the gym to save time. In the gym? Apparently. I feel like gyms have bathrooms very close by. Seems like that would be illegal. Yeah. Yeah. I remember when that came out. There was like a big story about that. And then the rock kind of fessed up. He was like, yeah, I do it to save time. Sue me. I'm busy. But I feel like he could get sued for that. It's not legal. Do you think I feel like he's powerful enough that he could just like tell everyone on set to just like close your eyes and then he's into a bottle. Also, like, it's like what we do with like our six year old son where I'm like, OK, I need some privacy. Like how far away is the bathroom? Also, wouldn't it be easier to just have it in your rider? You need a bathroom near the set. Like also like that easier than pissing in a fucking but which what bottles? Are you pissing in? So like, isn't there a ton of downtime when you make a movie like in between scenes and like set ups? There's a lot of downtime for actors to go pee. I feel like on the jungle doing Jumanji or whatever. Sure. But if you're in a Hollywood set, it's like really clean, nice porta potty. I feel like it'd be easier than ever to find somewhere to pee in the jungle. That's a good point as well. I that's a great point. I don't. This is like, you don't need to pee into a bottle. Is there like a like a like a blue tent like in the NFL? They erect for him to pee. He's like, I gotta bring in the tent. That'd be way more normal, though, if you had a pee tent. That'd be fine. You like, what is the cloaking apparatus he uses to pee in bottles on set? Also, what kind of bottle is it? Because I feel like if it's plastic, are you going to get I was going to say, is it like one of them like thick Gatorade bottles fit a chode worth? But here's the question. Do you think it's a reusable bottle? Like, are they just counting on plastic bottles being around? What's a not reusable bottle like one? Pissing a paper bottle. Well, I'm saying, is it like a Nalgene? Is it like a plastic bottle that they bring with them? And it's the Rock's Piss bottle. Or I bet you he uses the same bottle for the day and then throws it away and gets a new one the next day. But do you think it's a plastic bottle that you can be purchased or like like a like a reused like a like a Poland Spring bottle you buy in a CVS? Or do you think it's like a actual like nice water bottle? Like Floyd Mayweather would never wear the same underwear twice. He would throw them away. Is it like that? Well, you think it's probably that see-through, right? Like, that's just off putting. That's just off putting. Well, you got to line it up like, yeah, you're right. Like, a Nalgene really kind of has to be it here. You need a big opening. I this doesn't this sounds like anti-productive. What is it? Not productive, anti-productive. It's like counterproductive. It is, first of all, peeing in a cup for like when you go to the doctor and you have to pee in a cup, not a lot of enjoyable experience. Well, I think he's I think Huyvitz is right. It's like a giant Nalgene that has like, you know, but this this can't be a five inch diameter and he's just you don't even have to aim. Well, you know, it's funny. I wonder who Rox Piss Handler is because, you know, Trump has this this like aid. They call her the human printer because Trump wants everything like refuses to read anything on a screen. He won't read anything screen. So anything that anyone needs to hand the president at any time, anything needs to be shown to him. This woman just has like five different kinds of printers she carries around with at all times. And depending on where they are, she prints it. It costs taxpayers eight hundred thousand dollars a week. And I'm wondering like who the Rox version of that is with his piss bottle. Who's the piss boy? Who's the yeah, who's literally the piss boy? He's got to have someone. You can just give a piss bottle to anybody. Who's he ending it to? So is that why that's why Trump's going so strong still? Because he doesn't look at screens, you know, he's off the street. That's a blue light. He doesn't drink and he doesn't have screens. He's going to live to 200. No drugs, no screens. No drugs, no screens. That's what Leo told Timmy. No superheroes, no drugs, no screens. You guys know what I'm talking about? Is that no hard drugs, no superhero? No superheroes, no hard drugs. Yeah. Is that really what he said? Apparently. These are models to live by really. Dude, Sean Fentasy. Were you there Craig when he said Sean Fentasy was like no white drugs, no white condiments. No white condiments is insane. No, no white drugs, no white condiments. No mayo is like I get the first part. Yeah, that was like when I was an intern. No ranch, no white condiments. Come on. So Black Tar heroine's fire. Right. I don't know. Maybe that explains Sean's career. I don't know. OK. OK. Wait, what that email, what was the email? He just wanted to tell us that. Yeah. Just wanted to make us aware of the rock pieces of bottom. This performative to formative efficiency is annoying. That is the word. It's performative efficiency. It's like just take a piss. You don't have to take that many pisses a day. You're losing maybe like three minutes of your day. How much do you think Brady's pissing? I mean, doesn't he he drinks like 200 milliliters of water a day? He's got to piss all the time. The last time Brady's pee was a color was like in the 80s. That would be funny to clear. If you ever end up pissing next to Tom Brady, it was just like a fucking fire. It was just like an incredibly intimidating stream. I said 200 milliliters of an ounce. How many ounces does he drink a day? Isn't it like 200 ounces of water? A ton. Gallons. Yeah, give it to me in gallons. How much water does Tom Brady drink a day? Underrated is his dad. It's Tom Brady's dad said that Tom Brady takes 45 pills a day, which maybe that's he's exaggerating, but like that doesn't get talked about. This is 150 to 300 ounces, which is one point two to two point three gallons. So a gallon or two a day? Jesus. So like a gallon and a half a day. I guess that doesn't sound like that is a lot. That's a lot. What are we talking about? Well, he's sweating a lot. He played in Tampa Field football in Florida. That's sweaty. Anyway, all right, D.K., you actually you actually volunteered to take an email here. Yeah, this one was great. So we talk about guys from the 1940s and 50s that there just wasn't enough people back then. So they lived these incredible lives and had just did all kinds of things. And the one guy that we're missing, this is very football related, Bud Grant, famous legendary Hall of Fame coach. By the way, he's in the Canadian Football Hall of Fame and the NFL Hall of Fame, the Pro Football Hall of Fame. Also, so this is this email is from Alex A-Bone. He said, please talk about Bud Grant on your pod. And he gave a very good list of why I should do that. So I went up and looked up some stuff about Bud Grant. First off, his first name, his name is not Bud. That came from, I think his parents were calling him little buddy or something like that when he was when he was a baby. It's just a good. Hey, his real name is Harry Peter Grant. Harry Peter. Did they know? Come on. Harry Peter. They knew. Did they know? It wasn't Harold. It's Harry. Let it happen. Anyway, he was born in 1927, Superior, Wisconsin, diagnosed with polio as a child. The doctor suggested that plain sports would help him. It's like straight out of like a Teddy Roosevelt type origin story here. Doctors suggested sports. He went on to play all three sports in college. Oh, sorry. First of all, he survived the armistice, the armistice, sorry, armistice day blizzard, which is apparently a big thing in the Minnesota area by hunkering down in a gas station for several days. Apparently, this was the biggest blizzard the folks had seen in in years in that area. OK. All right. Thank you. I can tell it's your first email. I just went into like telling a story like Norm MacDonald there. But it was the biggest blizzard they'd seen in years there. Anyway, he survived it, graduated high school in 1945, joined the Navy and went to he went to the Great Lakes Naval Trading Station and played on a team coach by Paul Brown. There was not very many people back then. Paul Brown, if you remember, is the guy who the Browns are named after and also who founded the Bengals. So this guy out of high school, but Grant Paul Brown invented pro football. Bill Balanchick would say Paul Brown is the best coach ever. He invented the playbook. Yeah. So Paul Brown also invented. I read some other things he invented off the top of my head. It was like some really random stuff, like watching tape or something like that. Anyway, he just invented tape, period. But Grant got out of the Navy, went to University of Wisconsin, played football, basketball and baseball. He was a nine time letterman, which that's that's a lot. His letterman's jacket. I mean, think about the women he was pulling in those days with that thing. He's like a tennis player. He's basically a tennis player. He was drafted by the Eagles and the NFL and the Lakers in the NBA. Wow. Drafted by two sports, played two seasons in the only player to be drafted by the NFL. Wow, I didn't know he played in the NBA. Yeah, dude. He played to play in the NFL. Two seasons and he won a championship with the Lakers in 1950. Back then they were actually in a place with lakes in Minneapolis. Wow. And then he decided after that that he wanted to go to the NFL. So he went to the NFL. First year he played defensive end. He led the team in sacks after the first year. He decided that's too easy. I'm going to go play on the other side of the ball. I'm going to be a receiver. And then he ranked second in the NFL and receiving yards this is his second year. That right there is not very many people on the team, I guess, or in the league. I don't I don't know. After two years with the Eagles, they didn't want to pay him. Well, I just I feel like you could just say though you're telling me that in three years, he was like, I want a championship with the Lakers. Easy. Then what let the NFL in sacks was like easy. And then was third in receiving yards in three consecutive years. And then the Eagles were like, we're good. Yeah, they got into a contract dispute. He let the league in sacks and then was the number to receiver in the league. And they're like, we don't we don't watch you. Yes, correct. That's. And then he so he went to the CFL. By the way, he was a little curmudgeonly. He was very big on discipline. So maybe it was like we're not paying this jerk or something. OK. He wasn't like a jerk, but he was very disciplined. He was very big on discipline. OK. So anyway, he decided to go to the CFL and he conquered Canada. He played for the Winnipeg Blue Bombers, three time All-Star. He was so good at directing people on the field, being like a field general, that they made him the head coach of the team at 29 years old. As a player, by the way, by the way, in addition to being an NBA player, a guy who led his team in sacks and a guy who was second in the NFL in receiving. He also had five interceptions in one game, which was the record. I know I couldn't find any indication of why he was playing on defense in this game, but he had five interceptions, which is still the pro pro football record. Wow, that is the head coach of the team. Yeah, right. Now he was playing for the Blue Bombers. That might go down as the worst coaching performance by the opposing coach who continued to throw at. Why? Why? You keep throwing. You're throwing right at the other coach. So he was the coach. Blue ball player getting five picks in the game is fucking insane. Yeah. He was the coach of the Blue Bombers for 10 years. They went to the Grey Cup, which is like the Super Bowl for the CFL, six times in 10 years, they won four. And then he went back to the NFL. He's like, this is too easy. I'm going back to the NFL in 1967. He was hired as the head coach of the Vikings. He was known for a strict discipline, as I mentioned. In fact, one anecdote was he was really annoyed with how the team was standing during the national anthem fidgeting and holding their helmets. And I don't know what they were doing. They were just not in order. So they he had he actually required the team to stand at attention and they practiced the national anthem. They practiced standing for the national anthem. We used to be a country, you guys. Now we're kneeling for it. Anyway, so Bud Grant led the Vikings to four Super Bowls. They lost all of them, but still a very good coach. Also, fun fact, he had gray hair in high school. Really? Yeah. He would tell his players that he got into coaching to feed his six children and that it was a good way to make a living. He would go hunting on Saturdays, even during the season. Because he needed the food. Yeah. He hated showboating and trash talking. So he banned spiking the football as a celebration. The players were so upset about this. They they just desperately wanted to be able to spike the football. All the cool kids were doing it in the league at the time, and he wouldn't let them do it. So he made a really compromise. This is a great coach right here. Compromise with his players. He allowed one spike per season per player. Oh, wow. It's the spike purge. Yeah. He was a Viking side coach for 18 years. He's one of two coaches ever to win the great cup and go. Or I guess he didn't win a Super Bowl. What am I talking about? He did win a Super Bowl. He won Super Bowl four. What's that? Vikings won Super Bowl four. Oh, sorry. I must have. I miss miss made a note here. But yeah, he won the Super Bowl. He won the Super Bowl and the great cup. And you know what's funny? We did we four. We were talking about this a few episodes ago about just like how long these people lived. Bud Grant died during the pandemic. Yeah, he was 92. He did. They asked Bud Grant to come back to the Vikings in like two thousand and seventy eight. He died in two thousand when he was seventy eight. I mean, he died in two thousand and twenty three at the age of 95 and technically worked for the Vikings until he was ninety four. He was an adviser. The other fun fact is he was Pete Carroll's mentor. Pete Carroll talks about this guy all the time. Absolutely loves Bud Grant and and and to be serious for a minute, he's like one of the biggest most influential people in NFL history. So shout out Bud Grant had an amazing life. Did some things that no one has ever done. It was like five interceptions in a game. Stop throwing him. He's the only guy who took off his skate and tried to stab a guy. Oh, D.K. I heard a Norm MacDonald joke yesterday that was really funny. What he was talking about how. They say that comedians are modern day philosophers. He's like, man, that's really insulting to modern day philosophers. Man, I was watching the Norm MacDonald roast of what's the guys from from Full House? What's his freaking name? Bob Saget. That's recall. There we go. That's recall. No, we got to do it now. He forgot. What are the twins, Dave, that Full House? Oh, Mary Kate and Ashley Olson. Oh, I thought you were talking about the character. Oh, yeah. Characters. Oh, I don't know the characters. I think they're just Mary Kate and Ashley. In the show. I think so. No, there's only one. I always fucked it up with the Olsons. Yeah, no, it was it was not twins in the show. They just they played the the the character together. Yeah, which is it's because they would often do that because of like child like labor laws. Yeah, you need to let the kids work and I know the children. They yearn for the minds. Dude, every time I see that, maybe it's like Minecraft is the number one video game in America. It's like the children they yearn to return. Kids love to work. Who doesn't? The dogs can have jobs, but not kids. Unbelievable. Anyway, Norm, he in his in his roast of Bob Saget, he just like went out and purposely bombed and did like the most like hilarious, terrible jokes. He's like talking to this one older comedian lady. He's like, people say you're over the hill, but I say you can't be over the hill, not with the car you drive. And then just like holds it. He's like talking about this other comedian. He's like, he has the eyes of an eagle, the wisdom of an owl and the talons of a hawk. Ladies and gentlemen, it's the man is for the birds. There's a certain like the level of confidence you have to have to do that. He's like one of one. I don't know who else could have done that. Bob Saget, he has a beautiful face. He has a face of a flower. Yeah, a cauliflower. A cauliflower. He has the face like a cauliflower. See, this is recall. Yeah, I can recall I can recall comedians like bits. Because you saw names or anything. Yeah. What's the what's the actor's name who plays the hot uncle in Full House? Oh, it's John Stamos. Stamos. Yeah. Fuck yeah. Who's the other who's the other guy? With the cut it out guy. I always thought he was Dave Kulie. I don't know his name. I never knew his name. I always got his name wrong because I just thought he became someone else. It was more famous. Cut it out. That was such a great joke at the time. When I was four, I was like, that's a great bit. Yeah, please. Cut it out. And then I grew up and like, it kind of sucks. Have you ever watched that show? Oh, yeah. I watched it. That's one of the best entourage bits is just Bob Saget fucking is crazy. Bob Saget is the nicest human being in that show. And then he's just like this crazy person in that show made me think Bob Saget was like a horrible person. I kind of still wonder. Bob Saget's insane, dude. Bob Saget entourage is a heater. Wait, I have to I missed something. By the way, this one's from Nick. I got Dan Quill wrong. Someone wrote on behalf of all the Gen X. Dan Quill was not Ronald Reagan's VP. He was George H.W. Bush's first VP. George H.W. Bush. Yes, I got that wrong. Oh, yeah, I remember. I remember thinking that sounded wrong at the time that you said that, but I didn't remember it exactly. But right, the Dan Quill thing was like he was not everybody. Just he was like a dumb guy. Have you ever looked up Dan Quill quotes? Dan Quill. Dan Quill said some of the dumbest shit I've ever heard. Like all the SNL bits and stuff on Dan Quill is just like he's an idiot. Anyway, still younger than Biden. Third youngest vice president in US history. Dan Quill. One of the quite frankly teachers are the only profession that teach our children. True. There's a lot of this. Like I got to find some good Dan Quill stuff. I've made good judgments in the past. I've made good judgments in the future. The future will be better tomorrow. It's I kind of like that one. Now we have like Donald Trump telling a room full of children that Iran was eight days away from killing all of them. Dude, the Trump Trump's children is another level. I got to tell you, I didn't think this man could rattle me anymore. But the combination of he was like the first term when he answered the phone, it was like on Christmas Day and was like, you still believe in Santa? What are you like eight? Isn't that about borderline? Like I thought that was like, but the Easter one, when he walked out with the fucking Easter buddy behind him and started addressing him and like in front of all the children and was talking about Joe Biden's auto pen at a table of like seven year old children. It's like another level. Like. Oh, my God. Dan Quill, it was just so innocent. And we were so young. Cheeky. Yeah. He's like telling all the kids about Iran. Oh, my God. Eight days away from killing all of you. It's honestly like George W. Bush. The whole meme exists because he didn't want to tell the kids. Right. He didn't want to alarm the children. Yeah. Trump, he'd stop. Stop reading the book. All right, kids, I have to tell you something. Oh, my God. They walked into that room right there just now. I'm reading these quotes. These are really funny. The Dan Quill. The quotes. No, the Trump with the children. What did he actually say? He said. Oh, wait, let me scroll. So wild. He he claimed that Iran would have launched a nuclear strike against the U.S. and Israel if he didn't start the war. And added. He's telling the kids six year old children. It's like. And added we can't let Iran have a nuclear weapon. School children. Oh, that's good. Get started early. He's just being pragmatic. Oh, we should do the Trump just doing the night that George Bush mean, but he just starts laying into it. He's like, they what? Holy fuck. Oh, fuck, we are fucked. Classroom of kids. Oh, my God. This episode is brought to you by Amazon. Life's full of little surprises like spilling coffee everywhere five minutes before a meeting or reaching for a diaper and realizing the bag is empty. Kind of like draft night. You think you know the plan, then everything changes. Look, life can be unpredictable, but every day shopping doesn't have to be with great savings on essentials. Amazon helps you cover the basics and the surprises because when life throws a curveball, it's nice knowing there's a place you can count on. Amazon save on essentials, save the everyday. This one's from David. Oh, speaking of recall. D-Bone. You have no chance. I was telling you guys right now, you have no chance. This David says breakfast was two shots of espresso. Last night at the Bart trivia, they asked this question. Major General Sir Nils Olof III is a colonel in chief of the Norwegian Kingsguard, residing in a Scotland zoo. What animal is he? And David writes, it took me a few seconds, but then I was like, I've heard that name before, but where? And then bang, it's from the ringer fantasy football show. They talked about him like two years ago. He was a major general? A major general. No, he's a major general, sir Nils Olof III. And he's at the Scotland zoo and David got it right. And so I ask you, do you remember what animal is major general Sir Nils Olof III, who is a colonel in chief of the Norwegian Kingsguard? Do you remember what animal Nils Olof is? I looked this up, so I won't say. DK, do you remember? Crushing. So we talked about pigeons holding high ranks in armed forces. We talked about... We have Vortex the bear. Vortex the bear, of course. He's being in command of troops. Hold on, I have Vortex. Wait. I wouldn't have gotten this, but after looking it up, I do remember us talking about this. Someone sent me, shout out to the person who went to the Windy City Bulls, the G League Bulls, who had a Vortex the bear. Is that Vortex? It's Vortex the bear with the Windy City Bulls. Sorry, what rank was he again? That was Corporal Vortex. Vortex was a Corporal. Right. This guy's a fucking major general. Pretty crazy. I don't know. I'm thinking like a seal or something. What is it? God, you kind of f**k away there. Walrus? No. Penguin. Yes. Penguin. No, no. I remember. Aquatic animal. I was on the right track. Incredible. This sh**'s crazy, man. I went back and was looking up. Mr. Olaf's resume. That's Sir Olaf. Sir Olaf's resume. He didn't get knighted so you could call him Mr. Also basically, this whole thing happened because some general visited the zoo and was like, I like the penguin. And then they just like made him a colonel. Maybe the Trump era is not that weird actually. Cache Patel is like just bourbon. He's like, here you can have. Jesus Christ. Also, the first Olaf died shortly after his promotion to Sargent in 1987. In combat? And then they just found another guy that looked like him and named him Olaf II. They're going to give it to his son? And they found another penguin that looked like the other penguin. Well, they used a phrase that I've said. His place was taken by, is it Nils or Niles? What's his name? Oh, that makes more sense. Nils. Nils. Nils. Nils. Nils. His place was taken by Nils Olaf II, a two-year-old near double. Doesn't that just mean he looks like him? I think so. Sorry, I don't want to be, I'm not saying this, but all penguins look alike. Whoa. Jesus Christ. Fuck. He's canceling him again. And then in August 2005, Nils Olaf II was appointed as colonel and chief of the same whatever and then. So they're just replacing the Nile, they're just like doing the clone thing? Yes, there was a four-foot-high bronze statue created for Olaf that's at the Edinburgh Zoo. Just go ahead. Yeah. Oh yeah, it is the Edinburgh Zoo. And the statue's inscription includes references to both the Kingsguard and to the military tattoo. Wait, the what? The military tattoo. Is it a penguin? Yeah. I don't know what that means. I, we're just giving this time. You fold in the cheese, DK, you just fold it in. So like one day some guys like, ah, the penguin's colonel and chief now. Colonel is like, and that's what the other guys who wanted promotions were like, are you fucking kidding? This fucking penguin. I'm passed over for a penguin. There was some guy who couldn't earn that rank. Just some general is like, I like. He's like, I speak seven languages. I've got to, I've got my PhD at battlefield tactics and this fucking penguin outranks me now. I like the penguin. Make him a sergeant. I like the penguin. Oh my god. He was initially a Lance Corporal in the battalion, but he worked his way up. Worked his way up the old fashioned way. I want to read. So a nut kick guy, the guy he said he get kicked in the nuts by this guy. Nut kick guy. Is he possibly good if he took a running back with the first pick. Now he's bowing out of it. We, well his wife made him bow out of it. His wife made him bow out of it. We are asked, I asked for wives, all seven of our female listeners who I think go for the seven. We're bathing in the light of the seven right now. We appeal to the seven. We worship at the altar of the seven. We worship at the altar of all seven female listeners. So we asked for some wives, some wife advice here. Wife advice. Wife advice. There's something there. Holy shit. Has Rachele not thought of that? Man, that's good. If that is not taken. Your honor, it clearly has a W, not an L. Can we put like a soft hold on that? Yeah. Wife advice. Wife advice is good. Can we call fives at a second? It also could be just Craig talking in his kid voice. Womadunze. Welcome to Wife Advice. My favorite plays of the day. Oh, this is, there's something here. Fives on that one. We got an email here from K-Wib. Wife advice. Holy shit. All right. Write that down. You seriously. That's that. I'm putting it in caps. That's a keeper. All right. Well, okay. But really though, what's the wife advice? Okay. So, wait, hold on. So this is from Annika. Annika. B-Bone. And the, as the subject line states, I am a listener who is also a wife. I'm not only a listener. I am a wife. My husband and I have not had children, but even with that in mind, I would never stop him from going through with the ball kicking. Obviously, it's idiotic. And probably isn't worth the medical risk. But I refuse to be a scapegoat. I'm in four of his five fantasy leagues, so it would have no problem clearing my good name from all involvement in the group text. As for a proxy punishment, my sister-in-law calls her dad a puppet. Whenever he does or says something that she perceives to be appeasing her mom. So maybe Thomas's league makes me need to make him a shirt that says puppet. Across the front and make him wear it to all future social events. When he's with his wife, yeah. That's good. It's like Pirates of the Caribbean. It's like, oh, no, puppet. And she says, by the way, I'm a 30-year-old group in Michigan. A chode is a dick that is wider than it is long. Should that be the new end of the breakfast? I love this different description. A dick that is wider than long. You have to cap your email with what you think chode means. Yeah, breakfast is what you had as the start, but the end of the email is what you think a chode is. Well, basically, you have to fill out a fucking form to send us an email now. It's like fill out your application. Take a number. This one's from Liz. Elbone. Qualifications. I am a wife who listens to the fantasy football podcast. Oh, then no, not Liz. You hear that? This is my job. This is a vocation, even. I'm not a joke. I still remember going to the DC live show and being like, Liz, was that the first time you ever heard one of our episodes? What did she say? She just kind of smiles. Craig's going to get this nut kick situation. She's going to hear, Liz is going to hear one episode. She's like, you can't do that anymore. All right. So Liz writes, my breakfast, coffee, the Chobani creamer, Oikos vanilla yogurt. My husband got me into fantasy football. Now, unfortunately, I'm unable to quit and obsessively obsessed with winning. Therefore, I now listen to y'all, which is, that's, I mean, and even I, that's the best strategy, but yes, I even listened to the draft show. And now I know too much about Ruben Bain's arm length. Anyways, to answer the question of if I would let my husband, he kicked in the balls if he made a stupid bet. The answer is no. Context, we don't have kids. I'm 27. He's about to be 29. We are likely going to have kids in the next two to three years. Therefore, I would feel the need to intervene on behalf of my mental health and our potential future children if he put both testicles in jeopardy. However, while he would save his balls, he would have to pre, he would have to pay recompense. I don't, she, maybe she's a lawyer, pay recompense for reneging on the agreed upon terms and to fulfill the original premise. My proposal, he would have to find a whipping boy, a stand in someone who would be willing to be kicked in the balls on his behalf, a champion until he found a stand in and the deed was done. He would not be able to participate in the league. Not only would he have to search for someone willing to do this, but he would have to deal with the shame of asking someone to do this for him. And this is the best part. Never has anyone done this ever before. She then writes, I'm CC my husband on this email in case he has any thoughts. Oh, that's good. Oh, that I really like that rule. I volunteer tribute. She's seen her husband and was like, let me know if you think what you think. Can he pay a substitute or no? Or does it have to be like through pure honor? Love of the game. Yeah, I don't know. Love of the game. Respect. He has to appeal to someone's chivalry. You know, I don't think you can pay. That gets into some murky, you know, some murky ethics, I feel like. What if he if he has like pay someone to take a nut shot for him? My friend Kyle used to get he would. I mean, man, he was broke when he first got to DC and he was like, he would get drunk. He'd be like, if you give me 20 bucks, you kick me in the balls right now. What? Oh my God. So I just want to feel something. 364 more days until next year's hockey tryouts. It's pretty smart because the more you drink, the less you feel. It by, you know, you get scared. Yeah. Yeah. Shut up, Kyle. This is like a test of friendship. Does he have any friends who would be willing to do this? I know. Do you guys have any friends who would do this? For you. That's a crazy thing to ask them. That's a crazy. Imagine that much. Imagine saying this like, hey, man. So I said, I made a crazy bet that I'm going to kick to the balls, but I kind of decided, me and my wife were like, we don't really want me to do it. So like, will you do it? We don't want me to do it. But you don't have a wife and are single. So like, who cares if you don't have a wife and you get kicked to the nuts? Your balls don't matter. Right. Yeah. Your balls don't matter. In fact, we might be doing the world a favor if we take your balls out of it. I mean, me and all my friends decided that if anybody needs to get kicked in the nuts, it's you. It's me, the first person someone asked is so insulting. Yeah. I like to create tit-a-tut lists, but I can't fathom finding someone who would do this. Finding a champion is really good for this. I like finding a champion. They got to be rewarded somehow, I feel like. So I want to, there's one other one here that blew my mind. Well, I want to know there's one other wife female that I think is important for us to read. Oh, it's from Carly. Seabone or K-Bone, maybe. This is a thrill. Carly writes, my breakfast was supposed to be a breakfast burrito with egg, cheddar cheese, bacon and pineapple salsa, but my five year old ate it while I was getting ready for work. So I had a bowl of raisin bread. God damn it. That kid's going to be strong. Patriarchy starts young, baby. Children. My mom's breakfast. Just fucking wandering around in the kitchen. Oh, I'll eat this. Should have been standing there. You got to get that high up. You know, oh my God. So Carly writes, I am a wife. One of the seven. One of the seven. We appeal to the seven, all seven. I am under her eye. I love that the women listening to the show are now called the seven. That makes me feel happy. I am a wife and if my husband made such a stupid bet, I would tell him to stand there and take it like a man. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes, which is one of my favorite sayings. Fuck around and find out, pal. Carly continues, but we also have three young kids. And I know the result of said kick in the nuts would result in him being bedridden for the next week, which is the only reason I would veto it. It's logistics right here. I mean, you logistically can't afford to have it. Yes. His stupidity should not result. I understand this. Well, Carly, his stupidity should not result in my suffering. Right. It's not her punishment. It's his. That's intersectionality right there. And so Carly writes, update. After I wrote the first paragraph, I realized I should mention, I'm also an emergency room nurse. And I spoke with one of my doctors about the situation. And he said he would highly recommend coming to some other agreement because the medical term for getting kicked at the nuts is blunt, Euro genital trauma. And the upward trajectory of a kick is much more likely to lead to severe injury to any of the associated anatomy in that region due to forcefully compressing the soft tissue against the bony structure. If a direct hit, almost a guaranteed visit to the operating room, operating room, that is, at a certain level of trauma, the testicle cannot be repaired. It just has to be removed. And a perennial injury, aka injury to the Gucci or Taint or Chode, if you will, Gucci or Taint, can have serious consequences due to traumatic compression of the bullbar urethra. So the guy that doesn't make him shit the pants. Well, we're getting there. So so the guy who allowed himself to be almost punched in the in the Gooch, but got hit in the balls actually got lucky because the fact the ball sack and swing dissipated the force that was transmitted. If you had actually been punched in the perineum, the results could have been a lot worse than shitting yourself. Really? So it's like the anti G spot. Exactly. That's exactly. That was he took the word that a car. Remind me, what would happen if you get punched really hard in the in the chode or in the Gooch? I should say yourself. Shake your insides out. Wait, the doctor confirmed this? No, it's you don't shit. It's a lot. You shit in. Next sentence is I saw some pictures of what that would look like. I'll spare you the nightmares is the exact quote. DK, were you are you like thinking about dabbling and getting kicked really hard in the perineum? No, I don't want that. No, I still stand by DK being like I was like doing uppercuts. He's like, what are you doing? That's definitely the way to do it. I just think it's like you're coming in blind there. You got to have them bend over and spread them. That's fucking crazy. In case human centipede over here trying to insane. Just you're just punching a region that that way. You got to get a good like to be accurate. Why do you have to spread your ass? I don't know. I was just kidding. OK, so wait, I thought that was a great email. However, it continues. OK, wow. Carly then writes my take purge. She was like, you guys are talking about animals that can kill you, take you down. Like we were talking about an ostrich. Last episode, take purge. We were talking about Craig, could he kill a cheetah? Jackie thought I was really stupid for agreeing with that take that Craig could kill a cheetah. Jackie was like, I couldn't. Well, I was like, they're the Xavier worthy. They can they're fast, but nothing. Yeah, they're nothing else. And Jackie is like, but they're really fast. And I was like, but that doesn't matter. Jackie's like, that's really fucking stupid. Of course it matters. Of course it matters. And then you call them a bitch. Jackie picked up a cheetah. Jackie called him a bitch. Called him a bitch. Jackie picked up this little stuffed cheetah she has. Calvin, DK's son. Me and Calvin picked out a cheetah brother for Jackie for her birthday. Jackie picks up this cheetah. Calvin and I got her picks it up. She was like, you see his little paws that you think aren't so sharp. And I was like, yeah, she hits me in the face with it. She's like, it matters that they're fast. Beating me with the cheetah. That's pretty good. Wow. He's like, anyway, wedding planning is going great. God, wish me luck. Carly writes on this note about the killing an animal. Carly writes, my take purge is I have to let you guys know, I think a squirrel would kick all of your asses. Well, they do carry rabies, maybe? Nope. The only mammal in the animal kingdom that can't carry rabies. Fun fact, actually. So never mind. The only one. So take that back. I think they can. I think they can. Nope, they can't. We've talked about this. We have. I'm sure that there's some way that they can. But anyways. All right, whatever. I digress. Anyway, so she writes. So this is where the email just gets great. She says, Carly says, I am a falconer. Sure. She's a wife first, a listener second, and a falconer third. Emergency room nurse on the clock. She says, I'm a falconer. I hunt with birds of prey. Jesus Christ, this is badass. She's sick, man. I hunt with birds of prey. Whoever this guy is, is lucky. She says, my favorite bird to hunt with is a red tailed hawk. OK, of course. King of the forest. Red tailed hawk talons are one and a half inches of razor sharp points with a crushing force of 200 pounds per square inch that can snag prey or person's hand or face. Don't ask how I know. Faster than a professional boxer. And all that's to say, wow, my hawks have gotten beaten by squirrels. Whoa. To the point where the hawk was like, I just won't eat today because squirrels have sharp claws, strong teeth. Their skin is tough as leather. And if one aggressively came after you, you would get shredded. Oh, yeah. Wild animal. What if I punted it? Let me tell you something right now. I kicked the shit out of the squirrel. I think you're going to get beat by a squirrel. Dude, why don't you can't even fly. These fucking falcons can fly. Dude, the squirrels can go up a tree and jump on your fucking head. I'd catch it. I'd catch it. I would throw it on the ground and stomp on its little head. Oh, Jesus. I don't think you could. You don't think so? No. You're telling me that your life is on the line and it's me versus a squirrel? And you pick, you're picking a squirrel? Oh, dang. Your life is on the line. And it's a fight to the death between me and a squirrel. A fight to the death. I suppose. It's a great take, Purge. Oh, that's funny. I suppose I would pick you. But I think the point where she's right. The hot bails because it's like, this isn't worth my time. I can go kill something that's, you know. I'll go kill a fucking bunny or something. Yeah. Yeah. So Carly also said, if we're ever in the Minneapolis in the winter, she'll hook us up and she'll take us hawking. Holy shit. Wow. Yes. That'd be amazing. Would love to go fucking falconing and hawking. I saw some video of a guy who drives around with hawks. And he, the idea is getting rid of invasive bird species and these hawks hunt these other birds and take them out and he'll be like, he'll be cruising or like a drive by hawking. And fucking release the hawk as he's driving when it sees one of these birds. And it just takes them out. Dude, I sent you picture. I'm sending you the pictures Carly sent. These are the pictures Carly sent me. Holy shit. Because they're hawking. Her hawks are pretty crazy. Red tailed hawk. Wow. I wouldn't want to fuck with a hawk. These things are. Dude, birds are those. Look at those talons. Golden eagles. You ever seen one of them? Great. It could fight to the death. I have break. I respect the tank, but I'm killing that squirrel. I think I will say though, some of them city squirrels that aren't used to people, I got to tell you, I got punked out of there's a great little hidden spot in DC called the, it's like the Siners Island or something. It's a little island off the beaten path, but it's on the ball and it's like a really nice place to kind of sit for like a quiet lunch. It's a little romantic spot. It took Jackie there for lunch and we kind of just like had some sandwiches and we're sitting around and it's a squirrel. I'm not going to lie. I got fucking punked by this squirrel because like I like basically the squirrel came right up to us. I'm talking like touching my shoes, like trying to swipe. They're like little kangaroos with up close, pretty scary. And they kind of swipe. And when you shave all their hair off, they're fucking ripped. And yeah, you guys, we should see Rick and Morty. Dude, tickets, please guys. Don't just like it. But dude, so I like step the battle. To the death. It's a rodent. Dude, I stepped at the squirrel. Squirrel didn't move. He's like Kobe muscle. I stepped at it and it was like, yeah, dude, like, and it was like swiping at me. I was like, fuck. It's like city pigeons, man. They don't give a fuck. Honestly, the hardest line in all of succession is like when Logan Roy right at the end of the final season is just like the rats are so fat, they don't even scurry away. I'm like, yeah, that is that is the city rats be. One time one time at Uda when I was at Washington University of Washington, I saw a squirrel running around with a fucking huge rice, crispy treat in his face in his mouth. It was like three times the size of his body. I was like this. Squirrel is that was the best day of its life. And then died that night. He went out with a bang. It was like a star face of rats. Yeah. He just OD'd on sugar and. I hate the mother load, boys. I was the pizza rat, though, was like pizza rat was was an all timer. That was like as the entire city was like, yeah, you guys know what a rat king is? Is it the king of the rats? No, it's not. OK, what is it? It's when a group of rats get so tangled up that their tails become intertwined so that and they can no longer escape and they just become a giant super rat. Don't like that. Is that a real thing? I don't know. Look it up. That reminds me of the in the movie Kingpin. He's like he's talking to Bill Murray's character. He's like, I don't know, Mr. McCracken. Is this legal? He's like, I don't know. It's fun, though, isn't it? I don't know. It's fun, though. Holy shit. Oh, God, who said rat king to the fucking group chat? Jesus Christ. Look at that. That's a rat king. Oh, I don't like that at all. No, not a fan of that. I don't know if we're going to beat any of that for the couple other ones here. I did want to just mention a lot of the people who I serve people email and if they ever got a lifetime supply of something. Well, yeah, a lot of people. Oh, right, right. To seems like a lot of horseshit. Yeah, it's all bullshit. You got to pay taxes on it, which sucks. Oh, really? So you get a car from Wheel of Fortune. They're like, great. Here's like, you owe like eight grand. So most people just take it in cash. But they're also just like, oh, yeah, like a lifetime supply of pop tarts. You have one pop tart a month for 50 years. Here's like 20 boxes and you get to pick. It's like a lot of the stories are kind of like that. Pretty weak. Very low satisfaction rate among the lifetime supply people. Seems to. It turns out winning the lottery is not all it's made out to be winning the lottery, but only junior mints. There are all the stories are like a little similar. One guy's got a lifetime supply or a year's supply of beer, but it was actually enough. And they were in college when the Heineken truck shows up. Wow. Oh, this is. Oh, yeah, that one was from. I mean, that guy's a legend. He's like, start his own fraternity. That is actually like a movie premise. Oh, I can find this. I lost your name. I'm sorry. It's here somewhere, but the base of the beer truck shows up. They drop them off 96 24 packs. And they're like. For the year. And they're like, what do we do if when we're done? And it's a year of supply. And the two beer truck drivers look at each other like, yeah, here's our card. But we don't think you'll run out. Oh my God. 96 24 back. I would do that in two months in college. I would. The only rule was you're not allowed to just give it away. So in theory, they're not allowed to have like a raging, raucous Heineken party that everyone knows about. Who's checking? That's kind of what I was thinking. It's like, I think they were a little too differential to that. The auditor. But here's the larger point. And I think something that. It's like it's like that kind Ben Affleck style character that just comes and checks on me. I mean, that's 24 beers a night with your friends for 96 days. I mean, well, so here this is Adam. This is from Adam. 98. It's Westwood. So they're in UCLA and LA. And he says, here's the here's how real life works. We did not even come out close to finishing the beer, which started strong. A lot of parties. But very quickly, the novelty wore off. The premise of free Heineken was not even enough to lure friends over. And the joke by the end of the year, when someone wanted something to drink, the answer was anything but Heineken. Oh, wow. You got sick of it. They got sick of it before. They're all time backfires, which I think says something about the human experience. Well, they. Yeah, that is actually the wealth of college students at UCLA. Yeah. But they should have just thrown a giant free beer party and had a great night. Yes. Heineken sales at UCLA plummeted after this. Yeah. The Heineken reps. This is what I am not drinking any fucking Merlot. Oh, man. That line actually did like tank the sales of Merlot like worldwide. What would you what would you guys want? Lifetime supply of reasonably, you can't say yachts. Yachts. Quinoa. That's the worst possible answer. You want to lifetime supply of quinoa? Are we eating a lot of quinoa? Yeah. I'm trying to be realistic. It's like it doesn't get to be like fucking Air Jordans. It's like I don't like quinoa. It's good for me. I know why I've learned about this. You don't want like what a lot of Reese's Cups. I don't want an infinite amount of Reese's Cups coming to my home. I want something healthy. But quinoa is a superfood. It's good for you. I'm trying to put it in my salads. It makes my kale salads better. I would love a lifetime supply of rice. I toast quinoa. What? It's better than rice. It has way more nutrients that you toast the quinoa and put it to my salad. I would like a lifetime supply of flour. You have to pick something that feels like a pain in the ass to buy, like an annoyance to buy. Like quinoa to me is like bananas or milk. It's like that's just like a part of daily. To me, I would do like movie tickets or like something that like, oh, how much a $20 movie ticket? Like that's ridiculous. Free movie tickets for life? Amazing. Well, that's much cooler than what I thought was on the table. Quinoa. Right. Movie tickets. Yeah. I saw these emails. That's good. In a free movie. We had MoviePass, which was like the closest thing we've had to Robinhood. Craig's going to put movies out of business. I mean, we've done that already. AMC, you know, they give you a lifetime supply. Oh, actually, wait, there is. Wait, there are two people. There were two stories that were worth it. You know what I would want lifetime supply of. And again, this isn't going to make sense when I say it, but like within reason, $20 bills. That's dumb. Come on. That's something I would say. No, but like, but you can only get like four a month, five a month or something like that. But I hate getting cash, but I love having cash. So somebody could just send me that whenever I want it. I just want money. That's not the same thing. It's a movie ticket. What's the difference? What's that? That's what's up. Come on. Do I have to even say this? What if it's a Domino's Pizza? What's the difference? That's what product do you want to buy? Money. Come on. So fucking annoying. What's happening to you? It's cash, though. You know, it's different. They're not just going right into the account of cash. It's literally not a product. It's a currency. The only thing that it does not count. What about a what about a gift card? That's just that just adds the adding a lot of unnecessary steps adding a step. Is there really a different I would argue about and you're you're above this. Is there really a difference? Domino's gift card is just money. You know, on that note, actually, it's funny you say Domino's. That's actually very funny. So Garrett has an email. In college, I knew a guy used to work at Domino's. And I guess they had some sort of employee class action suit. And he was given a choice between a cash payout or a lifetime supply of cheesy bread. Not even pizza. Cheesy bread. They couldn't even give him pizza. And naturally he made the correct choice of a lifetime supply of cheesy bread over the money. So now there was. What was the money like $500? I don't know. So there were some practical limitations like he couldn't order 20 boxes at a time or in a day or whatever. But he had some coupon code. And whenever he wanted cheesy bread, he would type it in and he would like like he just got cheesy bread whenever he wanted forever. Oh my God. I feel like that'd be fun for like two weeks. Well, there are other ones that are funny. Like someone apparently got an accident with a chicken truck of a chicken company and they gave him cash. But they also instead of like full cash, they were like, give me half cash, half lifetime supply of chicken. And so Laramie wrote this in Elvo. Half lifetime supply. No, no, sorry. Like do you want money settlement? We'll take half money. But and we also want a lifetime supply of chicken. Yeah. So Laramie said this co-worker he had just had their grandma just had a number and from this car accident and they had a chicken guy. And whenever they wanted chicken, they just called the chicken guy and the chicken truck would show up that stock supermarket and they just drop off chicken at the house. Just traumatized the grandmother. Exactly. Every time this chicken truck stance shows up. That's the one that hit me. Like are we talking like chicken tenders? Like just live chickens? I'm glad you asked breasts, nuggets, cutlets, whatever you see in the grocery that's in the frozen chicken section and the company would drop it off in a cooler with dry ice. Oh, that's nice. It's not bad. No, that's pretty good. That's very useful. Better than quinoa. I was trying to be a court. Certainly better than $20 bills. No way. No way. Right. That's pathetic. That's so. I don't actually understand that at all. You break in the rules. Just get. What do you want a lifetime supply of chicken? It's like a bank. It's like, no, no, it's like, hey, Domino's, instead of me ordering four pizzas, you just, you just give me $4, $20 bills. That's what I want. You want a lifetime supply of money. Yeah. So I could buy whatever I want. It's cash. That's the loophole. Maybe a brilliant loophole, actually. This is the best one, which is from Nick. I would do socks, by the way. Yeah, that's. Well, we talked about, oh, people send in socks that from Indian white shirts. I like the t-shirt idea. People send in suggestions for white shirts. Oh, yeah. I got to send in an episode soon. And socks for me. So Nick writes, this is how all of them should work. Okay. Nick writes in breakfast, black coffee, chocolate and peanut butter overnight oats and three homemade egg bites. Nice. There's a famous hot dog and burger place in Buffalo called Ted's. My dad went to Ted's in Buffalo so much for lunch that he entered a contest and he won a lifetime supply of hot dogs. And it came with a golden hot dog key chain that he shows anytime he's at Ted's. And he flashes it like a badge with so much pride. And the rule is you get a free hot dog anytime you go there. And when you buy something else like a burger or you want a chicken sandwich, it doesn't count. But free hot dogs every time you show up. And even after you die, you can pass along the famous golden key chain to a family member. And it turns out. It's like a family heirloom. Yes. And his sisterhood of traveling hot dogs. So Nick's dad passed over his two actual kids and gifted the golden hot dog key chain to his first granddaughter. Wow. And in a twist, the granddaughter hates hot dogs. They're fighting over this in like fucking court. I wanted that hot dog necklace. I love that. I think that's it should all like that should be should have a golden fucking pass like Willy Wonka. Let me ask you a question. How many hot dogs do you guys eat a year? More than you, I promise that. Hot dogs are great. I'm guessing for me, probably like three. Three. You have a case of the everyday note. Here's how many baseball games to go to a year. Let's start there. I've had two this year. I went to a baseball game. Not that many. Yeah. I think I eat three to five hot dogs a year, probably. Yes. I've probably already had five this year because I went to a baseball game and then someone else had a grill. So I probably want them forgetting. I don't seek out hot dogs. Less is more game. I'm getting hot dogs. When you play golf, do you ever get a hot dog, Craig? At the turn, you never get a hot dog? No. You never do a glizzy after nine holes? No. What? I don't. Glizzy. What's a glizzy? I don't know what that is. I don't know why Hive is just willingly saying that, but I would know. I don't know what are hot dogs. I want to feel good when I'm playing golf. You can't even drink a beer when you play golf and you're fucking scarfing down hot dogs? Well, I can drink a beer. I just can't drink three beers and play well. But the hot dog, you're feeling great. The hot dog is a direct correlation with the beer, right? Because when you have three beers, fucking hot dog sounds good. Yeah, goddamn right. Like once or twice a year, hot dog absolutely rips. Well, Fourth of July right there. You're not having two dogs on the Fourth of July? Yeah, two. Yeah, probably. Do you guys watch the hot dog contest? No. I mean, I have. Dude, the guy who talks before the hot dog contest is a legend. What's he say? I actually wouldn't believe me if I did. If I told you, you wouldn't believe me if I told you what this guy says. DK, how many hot dogs do you think you could eat? And how long do they have? They have like 12 minutes to do like 70. DK, how many hot dogs do you think you could eat in 12 minutes? Four. Really? You could do that. How many hot dogs do I want? Is your life dependent on it? My life depends. If it was a battle to the death. Probably like 12, 13. Yeah, something like that. God, that would be disgusting. I don't like when they dunk in the bun and water. It's like, oh. No, that's tough. That's tough. I think that should be banned. I think they should have to eat it like normal hot dogs. That's like fakes bit. Like dog in bun. You shouldn't get to separate it. No, dog in bun. Eat it like we do. Did you guys see, by the way, did you see that the Mariners had a Randy Johnson tribute night and they had a huge hot dog called that they called the big unit? That's incredible. Also, when speaking of the Mariners, our guy Tyler threw out the first pitch. Oh, he did it. Oh, he did. Yeah, and they freaking cheated. Did he wing it as hard as he could? I think it was low and outside. Better than Malik Willis. I know. Oh, my God. Malik Willis' first pitch. That's, can you, should that void his guarantees in his contract? Right. Malik Willis, if you don't know, threw a first pitch at a Marlins game and basically threw it. He almost killed a bystander. It looked like a, like a, it looked like a, like, looked like he'd never throw in a baseball. But I will say Patrick Mahomes had a really bad first pitch at a baseball game once. So that's true. Also, his dad was a pitcher, so that makes it like a thousand times worse. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Mahomes' dad was a major league pitcher. He grew up in fucking like clubhouses. Malik Willis' motion, like it literally just looked like he was throwing a football. Like he did. He did not alter his throwing motion at all. Not at all. It looked like, you know, like a football kind of passes off your fingertips at the end. And it looked like he did it just to the fact that a baseball is much smaller. No. And it was, he was almost like he was shocked it left his hand when it did. I would love to throw a first pitch. It's kind of a lifelong dream of mine. So what level of baseball are you down for? Because we could get you in at the, we could get you in the River to House offer. I want to do it at Dodger Stadium, baby. Wait, I mean, you don't get started at all. That's a little tougher. That's a little tougher. Yeah. Can we maybe crawl before we walk? Yeah. Would you do a AAA game if we got it for you? You didn't let me do it at an A's game? No one goes to those. Don't even notice. No one would even know. I could probably throw a tee. Craig throws out a ball at the first pitch at an A's game. Does anyone hear it? That means I have to go to Sacramento though. You know what's so funny? I think the odds of you throwing out a Dodger's first pitch are so much higher than like the Savannah Bananas. The Savannah Bananas get like Eli Manning. Or like the Drew Brees for New Orleans. Like you have no shot. Dodgers, it's like possible. Yeah. I'll just like lie, say I was in the hotel. The Dodgers get like supremely famous people. Take care. Did anybody hear that? I missed it. Sorry. I said I'll just lie and say I was in the military and they'll let me do it. Stolen Valor. Yeah. I'm sorry. Me and my penguin here are corporal chief. I'm like, look at this metal around my neck. They're like, that's a gold hotdog. That's recall. Yeah. Okay. I was going to ask if you guys want to hear my Mr. Beast theory, but you can either hear that or save it for a future episode. Do you think it will spark a two minute conversation or a 10 minute conversation? Only one way to find out. Okay. Do you know Mr. Beast sells chocolate bars? Yeah. Yeah. What do they call Beastables? You've already told us this, I think. On the show? Yeah. What are they called? They have a name. Beastables or something? I think Mr. Beast is going to do a Willy Wonka golden ticket thing. Why the fuck would he sell chocolate bars? He says chocolate bars and gas stations that are allegedly like less ingredients or whatever. Bullshit. He's going to do a Willy Wonka golden ticket. Kill several children who show up with the golden tickets. Who deserved it? Those kids, there was one rule. Great, it's still illegal. Don't drink out of the chocolate fountain, Augustus Gloop, you fucking idiot. There's one rule on the tour. Yeah. Hands inside the vehicle. Veruca salt, not the best. Also, I'm pretty sure other companies have done the Willy Wonka thing. Yeah, but it'll be bigger when he does it. Yeah. He's got some Willy Wonka vibes. Yeah, some weird compound in some North Carolina that you go to. You know he's going to do this, it'll be the biggest thing. Craig, do YouTube voice for a minute. Oh yeah, give us the YouTube accent. I brought 100 children to my Willy Wonka castle and we'll see how many chocolate bars they can eat. It's like a weird version of like newscaster voice. It's horrible. Back to you, Tom. It's like so old. It's like so unnatural, like no humans. You'd never hear someone speak like that in the wild. Very bizarre. It's the worst. Do one more. Pfeff, if you got a golden ticket, that'd be pretty good content. I want to see no one. Oh, he's like, I'm making a video. I collected a golden ticket from MrBeast YouTube Challenge and we're going to show you what it's really like inside. Pfeff. We're going to see if I can beat a squirrel in a fight to the death. I went and fought a cheetah and then it was attended to because I was on the precipice of death. Oh my god. Oh god, that's real. That's MrBeast in a nutshell. Yeah. He probably will fight a squirrel. To the death. I fought a squirrel and lost. I went to the Serengeti to see if I could outrun a cheetah. Thank you, DK. Thank you, Craig. Thanks, MrBeast, for the invitation to die in your factory. Thank you. To your factory. Thank you, Cap. Your fucking content factory. It's content factory. Your factor. I don't know why that's a funny term. Your factory. Thank you, MrBeast, for letting us come to your factory. Fucking MrBeast. Yeah. That's President Beast. President Beast. Thank you, Cam. Thank you, Austin. Thank you, Abu. Thank you for listening. Thank you for the email. Thank you to the seven. Thank you to the High Council of the seven for all the wife advice. That's right. Really special. What hate advice is good. Thank you, Lauren. Lauren, thank you, Squirrel Nut Zippers. Whoa. Dude, I have a cheshire. I don't know what's on my mouth today. What the fuck was that? A cheshire on camera? How do you just shard it? I think somebody just kicked you in the tank. That was... Oh, shit. That was like the air escaping my body. Yeah, that was just like the air escaping my body. What was that? Squirrel tug-nut zippers? Squirrel Nut Zippers is a swing and jazz band. I remember hearing about them. Squirrel Nut Zippers. Growing up. My buddy in high school had a band called Squirrel Plague. And... God damn it. Squirrel Plague? Yeah, and he got... Did you tell him that ironically, Squirrels are the only rodent in the world that can't carry the plague? He was a buddy of mine from college, so I didn't go to high school with him, but he brought a few Squirrel Plague shirts to college. Yeah, I would wear them around. Squirrel Plague. Yeah. That's funny. Squirrel Plague is like the name of a band in a movie. Squirrel Plague. Squirrel Plague. We should have a call out for just funny band names that we could use. Yeah. Squirrel Plague. Oh, I literally found their logo on Google. Are they still touring? No, they're not. They kind of broke up in high school, but that was on the shirt. Wow, that's pretty sick. Yeah. Good branding. Yeah. So that's Squirrel Plague. Let me see the Squirrel Plague. Oh, wow, that's... It's a pretty great logo. Yeah. Holy shit. That should be your team name and fantasy this year. Shout out, Mike. Should we let people vote on our team names? Shout out to my boy, Mike. Squirrel Plague. Like, yeah. What kind of music was it? I'm guessing like punk rock. It was like ska. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That makes sense. He's from San Diego, you know. I can already tell like the kind of vibe. All right. Check him out. Squirrel Plague. Goodbye, everyone. Okay. Okay. Okay. Must be 21 plus and present in select states for Kansas and affiliation with Kansas Star Casino or 18 plus and present in D.C., Kentucky, or Wyoming. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER or 1-800-MY-RESET. Call 1-888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org slash chat in Connecticut or visit mdgamblinghelp.org in Maryland. Hope is here. Visit gamblinghelplinema.org or call 800-327-5050 for 24-7 support in Massachusetts or call 1-877-8 Hope NY or text Hope NY in New York. For Louisiana call 1-877-770-7867.