Welcome to Obsessed, where Mika, Tia and I challenge the thoughts that limit you, where we provide the tools for transformation, be prepared to be swept away into the raw power of obsession, unlocking secrets and stories behind the insatiable hunger for growth and change. This is more than just a podcast, this is your story. It is a manifesto for those who refuse to settle, who dare to dream and who are relentless in the pursuit of living a great life. Get obsessed with your life. You and I go the extra mile to take care of our skin. How would you like lavish organic skincare products at a fraction of the cost? Yes, the organic skin company, their motto is happy skin, happy planet. This is a first skincare product that has combined luxury, captivating aromas and well-being for us and our planet earth that we share. My skin is glowing and it smells like sweet rosemary after every use. Feeling so grateful right now that this product, their line is not exclusive just to New Zealand. It is now available in the US, it's available at the click of a button. Their whole line is extensive. You can easily go from vitamin C that has nine active ingredients that hydrate and revitalizes your skin to the turmeric oil, which is for your face, for any dark spots, fine lines and wrinkles and hydrating face oil. The list goes on. It's available now. Get familiar and get obsessed with your organic skin company. What does your space say about you? What does your space take a look around wherever you are right now? Are you in your office, your bedroom, your car, your kitchen? What does your space say about you? Does it say you're messy, that you're unorganized? Does it say you need everything perfect and aligned? Does it say you're creative? I just can't wait for you guys to meet one of my favorite humans in the world, Mary Elizabeth Denman. She has an amazing new book coming out called The Princess and the RV. We're going to get deep into it. I just want to find out how your stories are reflected in the space around you. She's an acclaimed interior designer right out of the heartland of Texas. So you might leave this episode with a little bit of a Texas draw. I don't know. Mary Elizabeth, I've known you on the periphery for a few years and you have intrigued me just how you do life. And I've been surprised about a lot of the things you do. I'm guessing you're a person that doesn't say no to a lot of things. Just looking at your space right now, you look very elegant, de-rest to a tee, beautiful. What is one thing you notice about people and spaces that you can tell about the person you're talking to? So you can see my background. It is what it is. How do you align spaces and stories all in one? Julie, thank you first and foremost so much for having me on here. It's truly an honor and I'm excited. Since I was a little kid, I've known that I have a gift to be able to look past a person's outward appearance, how they may present themselves. Sometimes it's something that I have to be okay with because I can truly tell what are they really trying to say with how they present themselves. For example, whenever I walk into a new client's home, they may tell me, oh my gosh, my house is a mess. Everything's everywhere. We haven't had time to do this or that. And I'm always first to say, that is not why I'm here. I'm not here to judge your space. Just don't even worry about it. I'm here to talk to you about what is your vision? What do you see for this space? And I can tell, is there, is it chaos? Why is it chaos? And what can I do to help them take that chaos and turn it into something that is manageable for their life, not necessarily manageable for my life because at the end of the day, and I always tell my clients, I can do whatever you want. I'm not going to live here at the end of the day. I'm going to be proud of what I put my name on. I'm not going to leave without it being 100% perfect. You're 100% happy. I'm 100% happy. But at the end of the day, you have to live here. I don't. So whatever it is you see, I want to help you get there. But it brings clarity to your mind. I always need everything nice and neat just so I can think before I start working or I start living. I don't ever like to leave dishes in the sink before I go to bed. I think a lot of what you do, and maybe you can dive a little deeper into this because you have built an amazing interior design business from the ground up. I believe you marry design and emotional wellness like no other. You blend these two things that are probably, and I'm just putting words in your mouth, maybe you're calling. And can you take us back to how you started your business as well as found your purpose through what you do? Yeah. My family is made up of a lot of moving parts. A lot of people that growing up in my mind, I saw as quote unquote successful in what I thought until I realized kind of an aha moment was there was a lot of lawyers. There was a lot of doctors, professional degrees. And I just thought that's what success looked like. When I was about eight years old, I asked my parents for a dollhouse, but not just any dollhouse. A lot of my friends were getting the Barbie dream house and I didn't want that. I wanted something that I could move the furniture around, move the rooms around, something that I could create, move, change. I did get that. And then I asked my dad for electricity because I wanted to have chandeliers. I wanted to have lights. He did indeed that. He got it hooked up for electricity. I got chandeliers in my dollhouse and working lamps with little light switches. Then I asked my dad, I really want to be able to put water in my bathtubs. And my dad was like, okay, we are not plumbing your dollhouse that is in your bedroom with water. So anyway, thank goodness that's where my dad drew the line. But that's really about eight years old when I knew that I had a gift for creating spaces. I tell people, yes, I have my degree in interior design, but it truly is a gift that God has given me. And I know I have the ability to walk in a room. Know what needs to change. Know where things need to go. As a young child and then a young adult, I was always wanting to change my room, change my space. And as I've gotten older, I fine tune that just knowing where things go. A lot of people call it feng shui. A little bit of it is feng shui, but also I want to make it work for the space for the person that's actually living in that space. And I feel like I'm able to do that case in point. I think this is the 11th house we've bought in Brandon and I's 28 plus years old. I've had years of marriage, so I've also had lots of personal experience in learning how to change it, move it, create it for my own life. You just need more and more. And I love that. And it's so funny how it's rooted. We all know that little spirit we have when we're little girls or little boys, I always love to write and create just anything on paper. And I pushed aside, I did go to school for journalism, but then I realized you only make $8 an hour and I'm not an $8 an hour kind of girl. So I pushed that aside, but I circled back to what I did. And I love how you said that a degree or you alluded to it, that a degree is not necessarily a marker of your success. Now I have a Juris doctorate, I'm a lawyer, I don't practice law, but I think I probably grew up a lot like you that you think you need a degree. When I met, I don't know if you know who Gary Vaynerchuk is, Gary Vee, when I met him, he is on this crusade to tell especially kids today, you don't need a degree. You don't have to be that A plus student. You actually success is not dictated from grades. So I love that because it's so true, Julie. College is not for everyone. And just because you have a quote unquote degree does not make you any better more than the next person. Yes, it shows you can start something and finish that. And for a lot of people, that's important. But also there's a lot of people, that's not how God designed them and how their inner bent is created to be. It's so important for kids to know that you've got to do what feels right for you. It's important for us as parents to not push, okay, you graduated from high school and now it's time to go to college, check. We have to realize who those children are, what they're about and be in tune with that. It's just so important. Do you think it's a different time? We had no choice. My brothers and I, we had no choice but just to go to college. It was just a thing. Yeah. When I graduated from high school, no. You were going to work at the freaking logo clothing store or for the rest of your life, which there's nothing wrong with that. But the way I grew up, no, you had to go to college, like period. I think today there's so many more opportunities available with social media and internet for kids. And they see, and these kids are crazy how creative they are. They can pick up stuff so quick and create stuff with websites and stuff that just blows my mind. Also education wise, the schools, not all, but a lot of schools are doing a better job and helping kids find who they are in their high school years and help them with different programs that they offer that it's not all college based. There's trade schools. There's being a pilot, just lots of different avenues that kids can go that is just awesome and gives them an opportunity to explore who they are before they're just thrown out into the world. And being an entrepreneur, I was never taught about how to be an entrepreneur or how to write a book or start a podcast or start an interior design company. That's all learned on my own. And yeah, yeah, I was expensive as college. Now you have two girls, right? A girl and a boy. Why do you think you have two girls? Oh, no worries. Our son graduated from Tech Tech University in 2019 and then our daughter graduated from the University of Arkansas last May. Oh, cool. And girl, I don't even know how expensive it is. It's a lot. Yeah. I don't like that. Yeah. You just go into it knowing that one of the things that Brandon and I were committed whenever we had the kids was we did not want either one of them to graduate with any college debt. And that was our just personal decision. We both graduated. Brandon had a little, not much. It was a gift that I was given. That was important to us. It was a gift because I can't even imagine like graduating college and we're talking 100,000 in debt like right off the bat. And that is sickening. That's insurmountable for me to put my head around that is a 22 year old ish. It's that's crazy. Yeah. And they never pay it off and it's always a burden that they're carrying around. And we're doing the same thing. We open five to nine accounts when they all were born, which are the college accounts, tax free college accounts. So they're not going to leave with that. But I guarantee like 70% of their friends are leaving with huge like hundreds of thousands. And that's why I think there is something wrong with the system. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I agree 150%. It's not okay for these kids to have that burden on top of okay, now that you're in this much debt, go find you a job to pay off this debt and there's gotta be more. There has to be more. And I love your whole philosophy and I am just riffing this from everything I know about you because the journey from even being a youth going to college starting your job, starting your family, there are so many detours in the road and I don't know about you and I find this a fascinating topic. I don't know about you, but for probably 20 years of my adult life, I wanted to present myself as perfect. I am perfect. I'm beautiful. I work out all the time. I have a handsome husband. My kids are perfect. Their dress so amazing. Oh girl. And then something clicked. And I think that is really a message that you share about there is no such thing as perfection because especially as women, mothers, entrepreneurs, wives, we are trying to keep it together and Oh, we're juggling those balls. I don't know when like it clicked for me. I grew up pretty fast just because my dad died when I was 14 and my little sister was 19. That helped me. I had no choice. I grew up quick, not in a bad way, but in a way that I was probably privy to circumstances that most people aren't. Then when our daughter was just born right after she was born, he found out my second dad, his cancer had returned. And so right after her first birthday, he passed away. That again, another big, huge thing in my life. And then my little sister passed away in 2013. How many sisters did you have that I just one little sister. We were about four and a half years apart. Your poor mother, man, your mom has been through Helen. My mom has been through a lot, but my mom is remarried to the most amazing man and he's my dad. I don't say that lightly. I don't say that. I've always hated the term step parent. I will tell you that when my mom decided to get married to Tim, I was like, oh, mom, what are you doing? I don't know about all this, but I had many people wiser than me help me get through that and say, Marils with you have to trust your mom. She is a very wise woman. She's been through a lot. She would not take this lightly. Fast forward. They are an unbelievably amazing couple. They've written a book together actually in life. The journey is everything. Wow. I need to meet your mom, by the way. Yeah. She's tough. She's tough, but she just meeting my mom, you would not know what she's been through because she is, she's super bubbly. She's gorgeous. She's got her hands on so many things and I definitely get a lot of my traits from her. We like to have lots of irons in the fire. Our house is definitely our home, our sanctuary, and we both work to create an environment when people come and stay with us, visit us, that we just want them to feel at peace and at home and that is important to both of us. It was, I tried when my kids were little to be all the things perfect, just like you said, always put together, worked out. My kids were dressed perfectly because I had a boy and a girl and just all the things. When I had my little girl, she was like my real-life doll. There comes a point where you just can't, especially as your kids get older and they start to become hormonal teenagers and they're little jerks and you want to, God definitely knew what he was doing when he gave into you and sweet and precious and they grow. So you have another one. You're like, oh, it's so cute. I'll do it again. Yeah. And then you're like, oh, wait. Yeah. And boys and girls are so different. It's, it's having two only children because they're uniquely different and I don't care what anybody says. You do raise them differently. We did. It just because you just do. I'm not saying that our girl isn't tough because Logan Elizabeth is one tough girl. You realize and what a blessing it is when you realize perfection is not the goal. And how do we teach our kids? Our kids are watching. And first of all, I want to know if this is just a side note. Are boys easier or girls easier? Everyone tells me because I think they feel sorry for me. They say, you're so lucky. You have all the ways. They're so much easier. I'm like, in the thick of it, I'm like, really? They're loud. They're art jokes. Yeah. I know. There's parts that are easier. There's parts that are harder. Obviously with a daughter, girls are more complex. They're more detailed. They're more all the things. Boys, their mama's heart, they're, they're just different. They're, they're different. And then Colton, he was our firstborn. Colton was like the perfect child. Whenever he did anything wrong, we were like, what? It was hard to discipline him when he was little because it was innocent as he got older. And then Logan Elizabeth, she's just a free spirit. Man, she is all in just all the things. But she was a shy little child. She wanted to be inside my skin as a little child. Now she's just, she's an amazing young human. Love her. Love them both. They're great humans. You did a good job. And I find that fascinating. The trauma that you received as a young girl with your dad, stepdad, your sister, and navigating that and building your strength. I think you had divine revelations of what you should be doing. And I believe, and I'm just going to say this out loud and you can correct me, that the princess and the RV had a lot to do with this trauma that you went through. And I love that you put pen to paper and I haven't read your book yet. It's out in September and we'll share links and share once it's out. It's going to be amazing. But I love that you turned your life into something more powerful. A lot of people don't do that. No, I'm very aware that a lot of people don't take tragedy and look at it as a learning opportunity. And I don't want to profess that I'm some wise soul. I just have known from a very young age. I used to think before my dad passed away, my life is so perfect. My parents are so in love. We just have this like little, Peyton Place, perfect life. And I knew that I heard this voice. I didn't. I don't think I knew then that it was the Holy Spirit, but it was like preparing me for what was to come. And once my dad passed away, it was like a realization of, oh, your life is not so perfect. How are you going to choose to deal with this? And I just from a young age, I just knew strength is from within. And I've always had a fun spirit. And I didn't want to be Debbie Downer. And the world is horrible. And poor me. Maybe I took on a little bit. No, I don't want to say maybe I know I took on mothering roles for my little sister because my mom was doing the best she could. My goodness, she did not set out to be a single parent with a nine or 14 year old and hello life. Now you got to raise these two girls. And I just, I think that God just instilled something in me bigger than. It's not necessarily happening to you. It's happening for you. What are you going to choose to take from it that you can help others? Because I don't believe that we're meant to go through hard times alone. And gosh, I wish so more, not just people, but women in general would understand that you're not alone. I can promise you some people have gone through it and reach out community connect because it's what makes life so beautiful. Have you ever heard of the podcast by Julia Louis Dreyfus? Wiser than me? I have. But I love it. I haven't listened to it. Okay. It's she interviews people, women who are maybe in their 70s, 80s, 90s, who are older than her, trying to think. Carol Burnett, just people that she has admired throughout her life. And Julie Andrews, they give her advice. I just think it's such a cool concept and, oh yeah. Surrounding yourself with women who have gone before you, you don't feel like you're alone. Yes. Especially women that are like us, who are driven, who know they have a purpose. I think that's so powerful. So you need to check out that podcast. Yeah, definitely. Definitely. No, I love that idea. We have so much to learn from those that have gone through all the things in life. Admit, I don't know, ironic when we're little, our parents are, oh my God, embarrassing. We just didn't, we don't even have parents. We just apperated into the universe to as you get older, oh, my mom is really smart. She's really wise. Yeah. I'm definitely seeing that with my daughter full circle. We've come to such a precious time of, oh, my mom does know some stuff. My mom's not as annoying as I thought she was. Yeah. Once you send them off into the world, they come back and they're like, I got it. When they have a baby, no, I don't have any grandkids or anything that I know of. And I realized after I had my first kid, I'm like, oh, so grateful for my mother that she, all this stuff. I, and I put my mom through HG double hockey six, like literal. And she says, no, you didn't know you didn't. But I know I did because I was so annoying and children are supposed to be self centered. Yeah, exactly. I mean, they, that's, I'm sure you've read Mel Robin's book, The Let Them Theory. Oh my God. Anyone who asks me, I'm like, you have to read that book. It is a game changer for you, family relations, personal relations, business relations, all things totally helps you navigate through things that you're not fixing to change adults. You are not fixing to change. Wait, I, okay. Did you hear that? Not fixing. I'm going to start using that. Not fixing. And I'm from Chicago. So I don't use that word as much, but I am going to start using. Okay. Not fixing. No, you're not. I love that. I love that. And I'd love to see that you are able to be vulnerable with your life and send it out into the universe. Can you tell us, and we're going to put all the links and update it once her book comes out, that process of taking your trauma and making a book that I know is going to be a bestseller. If I have anything to do with it, I'll make it a bestseller. I know how to do that, by the way, it's not that hard, but it is something will happen because you've manifested it and you're changing people's lives through their spaces and through your words. The Brandon and I went through, oh, about a two year period, an unplanned adventure that was filled with learning opportunities, deceptive people, circumstances beyond our control. And we definitely, before we embarked on it, we thought, here we are. Our kids are out of the house. We've finally come to empty nest. It's time to live our best life. Thought we'd buy this RV. We are not RV people. We knew not one thing about RV. And if you do know something about RVing, then you know that is literally crazy what Brandon and I did. One of our neighbors, she grew up RVing. And I remember one friend pulled down the street, pulling that 40 foot fifth wheel toy hauler. She's, oh, y'all are really doing this. Like, oh, yeah, it's going to be great. Don't worry. Anyway, fast forward. We thought we were moving to Pennsylvania, did not work out. And we came back to Texas, did not know where we were going to land. We had no home base. We had sold our home of 15 years that we had raised our children in. I am very much one that I need a home base. I need to have my home base. Once we came out of the experience, decided where we were going to live, bought our house. Brandon started telling people that I was going to write a book. And I'm like, babe, I'm really not going to write a book. I don't ever want to relive that experience. Like it was awful. And then God just really tapped me on the shoulder and said, but was it awful? Basically, you didn't die. I don't want to make light of it, but you are unique in that you have traversed hard things in life and you have learned to overcome them and bring positive things from them. You did go through this and God did know I had to have the no home. I had to be completely removed from everything that gave me comfort to learn the lessons that I learned during that time. I was warming up to it. And then I don't want to say secretly that Kevin and Brandon signed me up for CreativeCon because it wasn't secret, but they didn't really divulge. And they both knew that I had it in me. And it was definitely something that needed to come to life. And I was very much, I don't need to go to that conference. Like y'all want to go. Y'all can go. I'll go and hang out, go out to fancy dinners, whatever. But I don't really need to go to that. As it got closer, Kevin was like, Marius with no, like it's amazing. I'm like, OK, OK, OK. Came to CreativeCon last year, February and something that stuck in my mind that JC said he was on the stage and it was just like a low moment. I think it was on Sunday. The conference was Friday through Sunday. And he said, I'm scared that you guys are super pumped up about everything that you've learned, the people that you've met. And I get it, but you're going to go home and real life is going to hit. And JC was scared that we would leave the conference, go home to real life, which does happen. We'd lose the fire and we wouldn't follow through with what we said we are going to follow through with. That hit me. It hit me. And I made a commitment with myself and I said, OK, Marius with, you literally have a year, you have one year to write this book. I did not know where I was going to start. I did. I knew nothing about writing a book, except what I had learned at that conference. And I'd been reading a book about writing a book, but that's the beauty of it. You just start, you just start and you meet people, you reach out. Last July, I hired my editor Blair. Amazing. This book would not be as awesome as it is without Blair. Blair pushed me to really dig deep in places that I probably would have left rather wept under the rug, not really talked about. She reminded me throughout the whole process, Marius, but you said you wanted to be authentic and real. She kept me on point. She definitely kept me on point and helped me to just really go through all the emotions of all the things that I had been through and then also what I went through while living in our RV. I'm thankful for CreativeCon, who would have known? And I'm thankful for the comment that JC May, and he probably didn't even realize when he said it how it would hit me, but hopefully other people. I love that, Mary Elizabeth. It just came to me. It would be such a cool story to have for doing another one in 2026 to have you with your book there. And yeah, yeah, I love that. I love that, Julie. I would. And it's in a way better place and a fancy hotel and lots of shopping and love. Lots of awesome restaurants downtown. Love it. I'm there. Good restaurants, good shopping. Yeah. Totally there. I mean, that is such a testimony and I did share with JC about how his words changed someone's life and he was awestruck and grateful. Guys, you're going to meet Mary Elizabeth in many different ways by reading her book, by listening to her words and maybe even CreativeCon 2026, but get obsessed with these stories. We all have these stories that are so powerful. We all have them brimming with inside of us. Whether you find a mentor or someone wiser than you that you can talk about it with, or if you have somebody that shows the stories out and you publish it or just share it on a podcast of your own or share it with the world like Mary Elizabeth Denman is doing right now. I'm so grateful. Make sure you follow Mary Elizabeth. All the links will be in the show notes. Get her book when it comes out and we will do another blast of this episode. Remember, perfection is the enemy of good. Until we meet next time. Thank you, Mary Elizabeth Denman for being here. I appreciate you. Thank you. Thank you for listening to another episode of Obsessed. We're Obsessed with You. Show your love by rating, reviewing, subscribing and sharing with your friends. Every time you share, you are changing someone else's life. Until we meet again, get obsessed with your life. If you liked the show, please take a moment to rate, review and subscribe. It really does help the show to grow. Thank you for listening.
