Thanks for listening to my call of the day, Bonserid by Vibrian Supersis Serum, my personal solution for smoother, more hydrated skin. Supersis Serum is a full line of skin care products all in one month. Get 37% off plus free shipping by going to Vibrians.com slash Dr. Laura. Remember, you can hear my radio program daily on serious XM Triumph and connect with me 24-7 at Dr. Laura.com. On a welcome to the program. Hi, Dr. Laura. Hi. How can I help? So I am 30-sub in years old. I am in my second marriage and I'm sorry, I'm pretty nervous and going over to break. It's kind of difficult because I had to hang on and be nervous that whole time. But anyway, I, before my husband and I got married, there was a conflict where his sister had messaged me on Facebook and chewed me out because I had expressed to my husband when we were dating that I needed some more time because he was commuting from a Northern person. I'm sorry, whoa, you need more time for what? I'm a little confused. Yeah, just time in between seeing him because he would come down for four days when he would, so he would work up and work on part of the street. You're dating this guy and you're talking to him about how you want to proceed in the relationship. He tells his sister, she doesn't call or talk to you. Well, he had to have told her how else could she know? So he would stay at his parent's house, which was... If he didn't, if somebody didn't, if he didn't, ma'am, why are you fighting me on this? If you talk to him privately and she found out about it, that means he spoke about it. Yes. He didn't maintain your privacy. Right. And he did speak to his mother and the sister was saying at the house at that time and so... I don't care how it got, that means he did not respect the privacy in this relationship. Yes, I agree. And you married him, okay, good. So she sends something nasty and what does he do to his sister after he reads what she's written? He reached out to her and I informed him because she messaged me saying, David, I'm sorry. Okay, listen to my question. When he read the nasty thing you say she wrote, what did he do to her? He called her up and let her know that she should not have gotten involved and that it was none of her business. Great. So why are we talking today? Um, so later years later we got married. His sister and I had never spoken. She did attend the wedding and everything was, you know, just moving along like there was nothing going on with his sister or anything. Um, but I got invited to a lunch with his other sisters and his mother and I didn't feel comfortable going because that sister was going to be there as well. And I, instead, and I may have made the wrong decision. I wanted to go and not miss out on other relationships. I reached out to that sister, um, asking if there was a time where we could talk, um, because I didn't feel comfortable going to a dinner as things stood at that time. And she responded, um, a text reply that she did not feel sorry. You did not regret anything that she had said or done and that she was acting in defense of her brother and, um, and that she wants to just forget it and move on and it's all water under the bridge. And she moved forward. And why am we here today? Yeah. Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today because. I, I still have hurt from what occurred. Okay, you need to stop now because you're acting like a girl. This is what I'm going to write a whole book on these days. Don't act like a freaking girl. You should have gone to the lunch dinner, whatever the hell it was. You wanted to have a one on one with an nasty person who doesn't like you, but you didn't want to sit in the table of four people which gave you some protection already that's weird. If she had said something nasty at the dinner, everybody would have heard her as opposed to writing something on Facebook or whatever the hell she wrote. So that was a huge mistake on your part of cowardice. That was ridiculous decision. Okay, bad decision. Okay, there's nothing to be heard about. This is the kind of person she is. Screw it. Spending any more time agonizing over a bitch is silly. Okay, silly. You never agonize over bitches. I only agonize over somebody I really admire. I don't agonize over bitches. Why would I waste time and soul my soul and psyche giving that woman another thought? Just be polite when you see her. Never talk about it again. Okay. And if you're invited to a group thing, go. Okay. Don't act like a baby. We do have a special event coming up. Then you go with a big smile and you're nice to everybody. Okay. Big smile. Nice. I don't care what it is. Big smile. Nice to everybody. Doesn't matter what it is. Okay. You have to stop acting like a girl. Sounds good, Dr. Laura. Thank you. If it were the other way around and this was toward a guy, he wouldn't be calling me today because it would have been so far out of his head. He wouldn't even remember it. Yeah. Yeah, I can see that. Now, there are wonderful things. I are a female. So there are wonderful things about us. But when we act like girls, we lose self respect and power. I think that's what I'm talking about. I think that's what I'm talking about. Yeah. I guess I needed the clarity because I hear you say things about men protecting their women. And so that's where I was. He did. He did. He did. Okay. Perfect. She did something wrong. He read her the riot act. She's still a bitch. But she hasn't bothered you about it anymore. What is it like to have a discussion about it? Years after it happened. What is it like to have a discussion about it? Years after it happened. You want to have a discussion about it. Even though it was not continuous. And she said, what are under the bridge. Let's just get on. That's not good enough for you. Yeah. Everybody's not going to like you, dear. And everybody's not going to be nice. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. One more question. With. We are. Doing. It's a. It's called a temple feeling. It's for my husband and I to make covenants together as a couple. And that's. That's where I wanted to ask you. So. Of course you're going to invite the whole family. If this is a normally a thing that everybody invites the whole family, you invite the whole family. She is not going to behave badly at this event. And you know it. Perfect. You got to stop being. I'm. I'm rescinding little girl. I'm talking about baby now. A thing happened many years ago. And you're carrying it around with you and. And crying over it. Come on. All right. I got it. Thank you, Dr. Laura. Okay. Yeah. And enjoy this covenant thing. Yes. Don't go to it with it. She's going to be there. So I. It is marred and destroyed from the beginning. Come on. Come on. Yeah. Perfect. Thank you, Dr. Laura. You're awesome. Yeah. Well, now be awesome with me. Give me a call at 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars. And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform.
