Forget Resolutions. Here's How To Form Habits That Will Actually Stick

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I mean Nivia Soft is the UK's number one body cream for a reason. It's iconic, affordable and works for everyone. Discover Nivia Soft, your go-to moisturizing essential, available at Hasco. Hi, I'm Ryde from Jabi Johnson, the head of identity content at Hasco. And I'm Noah Michaelson, director of HuffPost Personal. Welcome to Am I doing it wrong? The show that explores the all-to-human anxieties we have about trying to get our lives right. Okay, Ryde. How good are you or how bad are you at forming a new habit? Lord, if it's a good habit, I'm terrible at it. I'm a giant toddler that like hasn't figured out adulthood yet. And I'm trying to do better every day. The habits are very hard for me. Just for example, dishes in the sink. Like Calvin can come and tell you about how long that has taken me to work on. We are not the dishwasher elite. Uh-huh. What about you? See, now I'm thinking, I think I'm good at making habits, but I also think I'm just neurotic. Like, there are no dishes in my sink unless Benji puts them there. And then I'm annoyed about that. Like, I can't even sit down to dinner if we haven't cleaned the kitchen. Okay. And he's often like, what's wrong with you? I'm not sure if that's a habit or that's just me being totally out of my mind. It sounds like a great habit to me. But if I am good at habits, I am pretty disciplined. I would love to know why I'm good at them. Or like, what am I doing? Or am I doing something? Or is this just autopilot? So I am very curious about this episode. Well, we're going to find out today. All right. We have with us Wendy Wood, a behavioral scientist researcher and professor of the University of Southern California. She's also the author of Good Habits, Bad Habits. The science of making positive changes stick. All right. Okay. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. know so much about how we think and feel, right? You know when you have a belief about something, you know when you have an emotion, a strong reaction to something, but you don't know when you really have a habit. There's not a conscious sort of awareness of it because habits are stored in a part of your memory and a part of your neural network that isn't accessible to consciousness. You can't really tell when you have a habit and when you don't except by observing your behavior and kind of seeing, well I put my seatbelt on in the same way every single time I get in the car and I'm not thinking about what I'm doing it. Those are good, good cues to having a habit, habit form through repetition and you can think of them as mental associations that streamline your behavior, your decision-making. You don't have to think about much when you're acting on habit. When you get up in the morning and make a coffee, you stand in front of your coffee maker and feel this thing, I wonder if I really need a cup of coffee today or how am I going to do this? What am I going to do? I mean, we don't need to think about those things. Instead we're just going through the steps that we've processed and then we get that cup of coffee. Would you say that a habit is the same thing as a routine or are routines and habits different? That's a very good question and scientists are not really sure about the answer to that. Okay. Many people think of routines as sort of multiple habits and sequences. Right. Your morning routine has a bunch of, is made up of a bunch of different habits. You get up, you brush your teeth, you take a shower, you check the time. So there are all these sort of habits, these simple associations that make up the broader routine. And I think that's the easiest way to talk about it, although as I said, it's not the way all scientists want to talk about it. Well, like yeah, I would think human behavior in general is hard to talk about or understand or conceptualize. So a lot of the stuff is going to be a little bit tricky, sticky as it is. Yeah. But we're going to do our best. So unfortunately, we think about our habits in the binary a lot. So the good ones are supposed to help us lead a healthier life and the bad ones are supposed to be unhealthy for us. Are there like neutral habits or things that don't matter, Dr. Wood? Yes. In fact, what makes a habit good or bad is just whether it fits your goals in the moment. You could start off eating ice cream on the sofa when you watch TV at night. And that could feel like a pretty good habit to have for a while until you start realizing that it has consequences that probably don't want. So what started off is something that seemed like it was working for you and you were developing a pretty, pretty fun habit there ended up being something that was now a bad habit. So whether a habit is good or bad, just depends on your current goals. Most of our habits are good in the sense that they actually work for us. And we probably couldn't get to the day without them. You'd be stuck in front of that coffee machine asking yourself, okay, so how do I work put in the filter? And how much grounds? You wouldn't get much beyond that. So most of our habits really are good for us in that sense that they help streamline decision-making. Important decision-making in the sense that it's decisions we have to make every day. I like that. They kind of protect us. Exactly. And for that reason, habits are stored in a part of our neural system that is separate from our goals and our thoughts and our beliefs. So you all of a sudden decided this ice cream thing is not working for me. I'm gaining weight. I'm not feeling so healthy. Unfortunately, that habit would not change with your decision. What habits develop slowly over time, they also decay very slowly. Right. So it's a great system when it's working for you. But it's a really problematic system when the habits have turned bad for some reason. You don't want to do them anymore. So I think when we talk about habits, there are these ones that are subconscious that we're just doing that get us through the day. But I also am thinking of habits that are ones that we want to create. So I'm thinking like it's the new year. I would love to be reading more. I would love to read 20 pages before bed. But I never do it. So how do I start a habit that I'm actually going to stick with? Well, that's a great question for this show. Because most people actually do that wrong. Probably what you've done is you have tried to remind yourself, right? That this was your goal when you get into bed. And you may have a book there, but you also have your phone. And you have a habit of looking at your phone. So that's your tired at the end of the day. So that's when you're most likely to fall back into old habit. If you want to start a new habit, the best thing to do is to make it easy. Easy to do the new behavior. And hard to do the one that you're trying to change. What research suggests is that you should take your cell phone out of there. Maybe have a basket that you put it in. In your kitchen, you can hear it ring. So you're not worried about it. You need an alarm clock, obviously. But you have a book there. And you have a reading light that works and does that keep your partner awake. So these are all things that you sort of have to think about beforehand. It's not changing and focusing on yourself and your willpower. It's focusing on what's going on around you that would make it easy for you to repeat the behavior that you want to form into a habit. I love this question because my son read my book, my older son. And if you have children, you know how often they take your advice. He's an elite athlete and he's already worried about how much he sleeps. And so he was looking at his phone a lot at night and didn't want to be doing that. But didn't know how to really stop it. I mean, he tried everything like you have. And it wasn't working. So he realized, oh, yeah, I could do that. I could leave my phone in the kitchen. And he calls me up with a few days later and he says, Mom, you'd never believe it. This advice you gave, it worked. I've now sleeping an hour more a night than I was with my phone there. I'm up. Yeah. Research sometimes is true. Well, he's a bigger person than me because I don't even admit when my parents are right. And I just keep it quiet. And my mom is usually right. I hate to say that. She's smart lady, but I don't admit it to her. So he's a good guy. He is a good guy, but it doesn't happen often. In your own research, you found that there are three components to creating the habit context, repetition and reward. Can you tell us a little bit about that? Yeah. So let me use this example. Habits are mental associations. As I said, there are associations between the context you're in and a response that you're practicing over and over again that gets you some reward. In this case, the reward would be reading a really good book that makes you feel good while you're reading it. Very interesting. And then also gets you out of that endless scroll habit. So you get to bed earlier. So there's all kinds of rewards associated with getting your phone out of your bedroom. The context is going to bad. And ultimately, what if you were a piece of behavior often enough in a given context, all you have to do is get into bed and you start thinking about picking up the book, not your phone. And then you know you're formed a habit. So habits don't involve struggle. In fact, when we've observed people who are really good at beating their goals and are very efficient at living their lives, they're not struggling to do it. They're not thinking all the time about, I wish I was some scrolling TikTok or whatever. Instead, they have formed these habits that just focus them on one behavior, the one that is working for them, the good habit at that point. And they don't think about anything further. There's not a struggle. It's not a white knuckle thing, which is why you want to make the whole experience easy. As soon as you start struggling, you know that you're not building a habit. You haven't set up the context to make it easy enough for you to repeat the behavior. And you also probably haven't found the thing to do, the kind of book you want to read, whatever, that is rewarding enough to make you want to do it again. Okay, that is really resonating. And I think it will resonate with a lot of people. I always talk about this working on constantly on my exercise routine. And I didn't realize that it gets easier once you have clues that you like to work out in equipment that you like, you find the right work out, you find the right time of day, the right playlist. It's the perfect storm and you need it in order to form a habit. And now that's making sense. It is such a simple idea. Right? We all think in order to work out, we have to struggle. We have to be really strong people. We have to have lots of willpower. But you don't. You just need to figure out the things that are rewarding for you. And I agree going to the gym in a cool new workout outfit. It's very rewarding. How long does it take for a habit to stick? I was reading some people say, oh, you know, do you have to do something for three weeks? Has science found that there's actually a time or a duration? And after that amount of time, it's more likely for it to stick. Well, habits are a learning system. So some things are harder to learn than others. Easy behaviors. Things like when you sit back on are going to become habitual much faster, then more complex behaviors. One's that involve a sequence of actions like going to the gym to find the right time. You have to get the right podcasts to listen to, figure out what kinds of machines you like to work out in. Maybe you need to join a class. Lots of decisions. Those habits take longer. Oh, that makes me feel better. Here's a question though. So for a habit, let's say I'm trying to use my seatbelt more often. What is my reward for that? You know, it's my reward that I'm just going to be safer, but that's not that sexy for me. Like that's not that motivating. So if we're trying to do a habit that isn't that rewarding, how do we do that? Well, you know, it took several things. It took redesigning seatbelts and cars so that they are almost automatic. It's easy to pull on. And if you don't put them on, they beat that. Right. So there's that constant irritating reminder that you're not wearing your seatbelt. There's also legal issues in most states. In fact, only one state, I think, doesn't have a seatbelt law. Those are more sticks than carrots, but getting rid of that annoying pinging is really, that that's pretty rewarding. That is rewarding. I think also fear is a motivator. My new food consumption habits are sheerly out of fear of like, like, you know, I have high cholesterol. I've had to, you know, chill out with the bacon and stuff because I've seen in my community what happens if you continue to eat these foods. So do you think fear is also a motivator for habits to form? I'm trying to think of research that has looked at fear and habit formation. There's no reason why it wouldn't. Okay, but I don't know of research that I can say yes. I guess you could spin that though as well and say, yeah, it's your fear of what will happen if you don't eat better, but also it's your desire to be healthier. Yes. So maybe it's just how you're looking at it? Yes. Then what it is is it's we are sure when you do the right thing. And you know, one of the things that I think is so funny in the nutrition literature is that people are certain they have preferences over what kinds of foods they like to eat. And they only want to eat certain stuff. They don't want to eat other things. But research shows that if you expose yourself to food, new foods often enough, you actually kind of get used to them. And then you might even start to kind of like them as you change your behavior and start eating in a healthier way, it may be that your tastes are slightly changing too over time. I don't know if you've noticed. No, it's already happening. It's definitely happening to me. And another sexy thing is when you get your next cholesterol report and it's like much lower. Positive reinforcement. Positive reinforcement is all I really just thrive on. But it sounds like what you're saying, Dr. Wood is also repetition is really the superhero here when we're trying to make habits. And repetition is the thing that the more that we do something, the more that it sticks. You got it. That is the key to forming habits. At New Balance. We believe if you run, you're a runner. However you choose to do it. Because when you're not worried about doing things the right way, you're free to discover your way. And that's what running's all about. Run your way at New Balance.com slash running. What's happening people is Marvin Taser from our podcast, Three Shots of the Keylar and we're currently sponsored by the Department for Work and Pensions. Live's busy and admin gets forgotten but if you're claiming benefits, listen up. If something changes, you need to tell DWP otherwise you could face a penalty. That could be a partner moving in even if they keep their own place. If your car doubles up as a taxi or family car, you should only report expenses for work trips or forgotten savings like premium bonds. To find out if you need to report a change, search tell DWP. Need a complete solution to skills challenges? BPP have got you covered. 50 apprenticeships, 16 subject areas, levels 2 to 7. Trusted by 10,000 employers and 13,000 apprentices. Get the right skills in the right roles where you need them. Offering expert levy guidance and a free apprentice recruitment service. Training that develops workforce capability and then some apprenticeships. Built for performance. Search BPP apprenticeships. I think for a lot of people who are thinking of a resolution right now that they want to do and they're saying every single January I say I'm going to lose weight or quit smoking or whatever it is, maybe sometimes they just haven't set themselves up for it in the way that they need to. Again, like you said, having everything in place, taking your phone out of your bedroom, having the good reading light, having a good book you want to read, you don't have everything that's going to sort of lead you to it then you're already starting off at a disadvantage. You need a specific behavior right? Habits are not like these broad things I want to lose weight so I'm going to have a weight loss habit. I just just doesn't even make sense. Instead it's a specific behavior. You're trying to add more fruit and vegetables into your meals. You're trying to eat smaller portions. You're trying not to snack to cut out the snacking between meals. Those are specific behaviors and when we set new resolutions we sometimes do it at this really high level that doesn't map on to any particular behavior and then you get yourself in trouble because then you don't really have a thing to focus on and you don't have something to plan. Yeah, so being specific and what you're trying to do and not biting off more than you can chew. I have a question about using technology, specifically apps. A lot of people use apps to drink more water to save a little money, things like that. I want to know if you think those work or if it's more individualized because I'm trying to learn Spanish right now. I have the Duolingo app. It's cool. I much prefer talking to my super in Spanish. I much prefer like real life conversation. But some people really thrive off the apps. What are your thoughts on this? Many apps are used for only a short period of time, particularly behavior change apps because you have to track or monitor or do some set goals or do something else in addition to changing your behavior. And so what you're doing is you're taking something that's hard and you're adding something onto it that makes it even harder. So people get tired of behavior change apps. I'm not surprised that you like talking to people, your supervisor, and Spanish more than using Duolingo. People are more fun. And you're actually probably more likely to learn it that way because you're more likely to repeat the behavior. I think most behavior change apps. They don't focus. They say they have it formation. I know they do. When you read what they want you to do, they want you to set goals and monitor your behavior. And they don't talk about what science knows about habits, which is you make it easy and you make it fun and you have to repeat the same thing. So they're appealing to your conscious understanding of habits. Because that's what's going to buy the app and so conscious self. And not the actual habit itself, which as I said, most of us don't, well none of us really understand because part of the non-conscious self. If we can't form a habit, if we can't make a habit stick, I think a lot of us think like that's our fault. That is our lack of willpower that's some kind of like moral failing on our side. What would you say to that? If someone, let's say someone's listening to this three months from from now and they tried to get a resolution and it didn't work, what happened there and how do they get back on track? Well, if it's a moral failing, we all have failed in that same moral manner. Yeah. habits are just really sticky. And as we said, it's for good reason because they're really effective. I mean, we need the function to get through our day. So we want them to be sticky. So when many people form their years resolution, it's to change behavior, to do something different. Most common ones are exercise, diet, and then the second most common have to do with finances. Right. And all of those things sound like they're just not fun. Correct. Yeah. Sounds like work. Yeah. But they didn't have to be. We can wear a cool clothes to the gym and then it becomes more enjoyable. So it's not a moral failing. It's just a failure to plan in the right way. It takes a lot of thought to figure out how are we going to make it easy to not snap at all during the day. How am I going to make it easy to stop checking all of these websites that are suggesting I buy a bunch of stuff I don't really need. Yeah. That takes thought and planning and understanding yourself. And you're probably going to have to try a few different options before you can figure out what it is that's really going to make a difference for you. I mean, I like to exercise. I'm one of the people that likes to exercise. And I used to be a runner and I would run early in the morning before my kids woke up. And it was just like this freedom experience of being outside. And I had nobody who needed me. And it was wonderful. But then you know, you get older and things change. I didn't exercise for a while. I just stopped running because I didn't know what to do. And then I bought an elliptical machine and I bought it. I didn't even rely on one in the gym. I bought it and it's in my house. So I thought that's making it easy. Right. But that didn't do it because ellipticals are really boring. I had to figure out what would make it fun. I mean, we're in fun, interesting gym clothes when you're working out by yourself. That's not one of the things that does it. For me, it was figuring out I could watch reality TV shows. I particularly like cooking shows, cooking competitions. Me too. And I don't have time any, any other time in my day to do those. So it's become a real enjoyment for me. And I actually worked out on the elliptical this morning before we're talking because I look forward to it now. Yeah, it's a treat. Yeah. That was me too. For a while, I was on the steer master. And I would watch all the old episodes of America's Next Top Model. And I told myself I couldn't spend real time doing that. Yeah. But I could be on the steer master and spend 45 minutes doing that. And then I felt like I was doing a good thing and I got my treat. Okay. So you know what I'm hearing from you guys? And it's like illuminating to me. I think habits are really about understanding yourself and like being honest with yourself about what you really find enjoyable and what makes things easy for you. Yeah. It's really cool. All right. I have another question because it's kind of time appropriate. I personally don't think New Year's resolutions are great. I know a lot of people make them around this time. And a lot of people don't follow through with them. Right. For me, January is not an appropriate time to start a new habit. I am miserable. Yeah. It is gray outside. I need cake. Yeah. I need, you know, my vices. I think I read like 88% of people who make a resolution end up like jump and shit literally January. January, New York is I don't even want to go there. Right. But for me, springtime, best time to start a new habit. I stick with it. You know, I feel motivated. It's lighter outside. You've got more going your way. Yes. The odds are with me. Yes. So Dr. Wood, tell me, is there a better time to start a good habit? Well, for many people, it's not time of year, although I completely understand your rationale. I hate winter. It makes me want to just curl up and to revolve. The time to start a new habit is not so much dependent on time with year. It's probably easiest to do something outdoors in the spring and the summer if your habit solves that. The best time to start a habit is when your life changes in some way. So if you move, then the cues to your old habits aren't there anymore. A lot of them have disappeared. They're not part of the new context that you're in. And so you have to think, do I really want to set up my coffee machine and maybe be better to have drip coffee or maybe be better to have a spesso or maybe I'm going to go to tea. The cues have changed and that gives you a window of opportunity to form new habits. Old ones aren't activated anymore. And it's not just when you move. It's also when you start a new relationship, our relationship partners are big pieces of our daily habits. They do some things. They do other things. We're all at working in sequence. If a relationship is working well, we're doing those things sort of smoothly. So starting a new relationship is another time when you have this opportunity, new cues to make new decisions. Starting a new job, having children, starting a new family. That's another time in which cues change. So it's really removing the context cues. And that's why some people report, and there's some evidence for this that it's easiest to make changes in behavior when you're on vacation or when you have otherwise moved house, moved location, joined a whole new group of friends. There's actually some pretty good research data on that. Something that's disrupting your usual routine and makes room for you to then introduce something else. Recalibrate. That's not really going to put it. I mean, it seems like the more that we're talking the more like you have to have this napsack of all these different things that is going to help you do this habit. You know, again, it's the context or disrupting the context. It's making it easier on yourself as maybe having a reward. Maybe it's having some sort of fear as Raj has had or the annoying, dinging with the seatbelt. And hopefully this constellation of things, if you put them all together or some combination of them, that's going to help you. Exactly. Nothing in that list had to do with willpower or self-control or white knuckling it through or convincing yourself, right, coming with all the reasons why. And it doesn't have to do with, say, fitting into your genes at a reunion of your high school class in the summer. That's too far removed. It's immediate rewards that build habits. And that's because habits are facilitated by something called dopamine. And we all know dopamine is this neurotransmitter. It has many functions in the brain. One of the things it does is it helps to connect context and response. So it helps to build habits. And that's why immediate rewards are important. Thinking about what you're going to look like six months from now. That's not going to help you hold. That's right. I have a myth that I want to address. I heard that the older you get, the harder it is to either break a habit or start a new good one. I don't believe it. I have a lot of people in my life who are in their 60s and 70s who are living so joyfully because they will start a new language or start playing seducu or something. So is there any truth to that as we age? Do we get more stuck in our ways? It gets harder to form new habits as we get older. Okay. Just like it does everything out. Yes. God-freeze. So you get neural decline across the board and habits just like everything else. I think that there's this sense that older people have a harder time forming new habits in particular because many people stay in the same place. They're not switching jobs. They have a much more settled lifestyle, a settled context. And so they're relying on old habits that worked for them because they don't have the stimulation or the change to form new ones. And the people you're talking about are people who are continuing to challenge themselves and expose themselves to new context. And that's so important as you get older. You need to find new things like if you can't run, you have to find something to do that is exercise. And for you, it may not be the elliptical. Their master sounds like a great alternative. So you need to keep up change. But if you stay in the same context, you're making it a little harder. You have to keep challenging yourself. Makes sense. Dr. Boyd, one thing I was thinking about is some of this is semantics. You know, we talked about habits versus routine. But I think when it comes to something like an addiction, whether that's to smoking cigarettes, whether that's to alcohol or something else, why'd you look at me when you said alcohol? I didn't. But if you say why and you can look at me. Yeah. But for someone who's really dealing with something that is an actual addiction, this feels like a different thing where you actually maybe need some medical intervention. Or I guess I'm saying again, like that doesn't seem like a lack of willpower. And some of the things we're talking about here aren't necessarily going to help with trying to deal with that quote unquote bad habit. Sure. You're right. Habits are not addiction. Because addictions typically involve some substance that causes a physiological dependence. Right. Smoking is a good example because nicotine is extremely physiologically addictive. But habits also have play a role in addiction. So many addictions also have a habit component. Okay. Like people who smoke a lot might have a pattern of pulling out a cigarette in a bar. And in fact, there was research on this when British pubs decided to ban smoking. There were studies showing that people would still pull out cigarettes. Look at them and think, oh, oh gee. Okay. Not here. I have to go outside. That's actually one of the ways that tobacco control work. It made smoking more difficult. Right. So smoking bands in public places, taxes that made it more expensive, taking the cigarettes off the shelves. So you can't easily just throw them in your shopping cart when you're walking by. You have to go ask someone for them. All of those things are ways of controlling cigarette smoking. And they were fantastically successful. They bought smoking levels down to about 12% from over 50. So that's like this wildly successful public health policy, which encapsulates the habit change strategy. Right. Friction. You put friction on things you don't want to do. You just make it harder. You make it so that you have to get out of bed and walk into the kitchen in the middle of the night if you want to look at your phone. Right. Right. It's not that you can't do it. And that was one of the cool things about tobacco control, right? They didn't outlaw it. They just made it more difficult. Yeah. I'm learning a lot. This is really interesting. It's all very psychological. Yeah. So okay, for our audience and for us, what's the number one thing you would recommend if you want to start a new habit and stick to it? If you can only pick one thing? Well, I can't give you one. I have to give you the two. I'll take it. More for my money. Yeah. Make it easy and find something that's rewarding or make it rewarding. When we started to point to those two things in particular, I thought, this is kind of simple. And it's going to seem so obvious to people. They're going to say, you studied for so long to figure this out. But the way we do it is not by finding what's easy and enjoyable. The way we try to change our behavior is we struggle. So it actually is a very basic insight that people didn't have before habit research made it clear how to best change unwanted behaviors. So yes, they're ridiculously simple. Your mother probably would have told you the same thing. But instead, we're doing all the wrong things. And we're learning that all that's what the research had to show. All the wrong things don't work. That's not how people who are successful are actually doing those. It turns out we have been doing it wrong. We have shocking. Exactly. Dr. Wood, thank you so much for being here. This was so illuminating. Yes. Good fun. Happy to go to you. Hey, this is Veer E. Anjala from Get a Grip. And we're Corrie sponsored by Top Cashback, the UK's leading cashback site that adds joy whenever you spend money. Top cashback gives you cashback and things you're already going to buy. Exactly. So from groceries and fashion to dream holidays, you can own over 300 pound a year just by shopping through Top Cashback. And we did say dream holidays with over 6,000 brands including loads of travel partners. You can get cashback on flights and hotels and even airport parking. It's really simple. Super joyful and so satisfying. Watching that cashback build up. Oh, joy indeed. Join Top Cashback.co.uk today and start getting money back on your everyday shopping and travels. Hey, Han missed you last night. Kiss. Two musketeers isn't the same. I hope you feel no. Thinking of, oh, she knows that. Okay, what I'm trying to say is you've got this and we've got you. Whatever you want to say, let us scored local florists help you say more into flora. Say more. Hey guys, it's Grace Beverly here and my podcast working hard is currently sponsored by Nivia Soft. The iconic moisturizing cream for face, body and hands. I love a multi-purpose product and Nivia Soft is a cult classic. It's lightweight and fast absorbing so your skin feels instantly refreshed and soft. And most importantly, there is no greasy feeling or waiting around for it to dry. I mean, Nivia Soft is the UK's number one body cream for a reason. It's iconic, affordable and works for everyone. Discover Nivia Soft. You'll go to Moisturizing Essential, available at Tesco. It's time for better and five. These are your top five takeaways from this episode. Number one, habits are the subconscious things we do every day to get through our day. Mm-hmm. Number two, creating a habit relies on three key things. There's a context, there's repetition and there's a reward or maybe many rewards. Rewards my favorite. Yeah. Number three, the best way to form a new habit is to make it as easy as possible to actually do it. Mm-hmm. Number four, creating a new habit is often easy as when your life changes in some big way or not big way. Moving, getting a new job, getting a new relationship. And number five, if your habit doesn't stick, it's not a moral failing, you're probably not going about it in the best way for you. Yeah. All right, Noah. Yeah. We learned a lot today. Was your habit forming what you thought it was? I don't think it was, because I do think I was sort of on autopilot. And I think I also sort of beat myself up if I'm not doing something. I think like I'm not disciplined enough or there is something wrong with me. Yeah. It felt so nice to hear it be like this is not your fault actually. And you just need to set yourself up better for it. Yeah. And then that toolkit of all these different things, have a reward, make it easier, you know, put the book in your bedroom, get the phone out of your bedroom. That made it very practical for me in a way that I had never thought about it that way before. Yeah. And I think that having these bite-sized things that you do, all lead up to success. And I like thinking about it that way. What did you learn? I just first want to say that the way we support and love each other, each other, yes, others, we need to do that for ourselves. Yeah. Like I think that support thing you're talking about is just like loving on yourself and making your life easier so you can be healthy. And not being so hard on yourself. Exactly. And for me, yeah, I hope I'm like a more of a grown toddler now because I did learn a lot and it's really affirmed my weekly therapy sessions because I do think in order to form good habits, you need to know yourself really well and find out a little bit more about how you function. So that was really illuminating to me. I also have the idea too, you don't have to do a resolution. You don't have to do it at this certain time of the year. Lord knows. There are just so many ways to try and start something or end something. Exactly. I loved it. Anyway, as long as there are things to get wrong, we're going to be right here to help you deal in better. Love y'all. 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