Follow These Rules For Meeting The Family

Yeah, my goal is to get the niece the most annoying gift possible. So they think of you whenever they're annoyed? That's right. It's got to be a funkel. Hello and welcome back to the Friday feels episode of the U.S. podcast. I'm Jordanne Abraham. And I am Jared Freed. It is so good to be back here with you Jordanne. Welcome back again. We got to give you a second welcome back. Thank you. This is like you're settled in. Yes. Now the show is happening. No more welcome. No more. Honeymoon's over. Honey, that's over. No more cuddle time. We're into real the business of dating and relationships. That's what this show is. It's a dating and relationship show. Modern dating, modern relationships. How to deal with the intersection of relationships and technology. That's what this show is all about. Well speaking of the honeymoon phase. Yes. You are newly in a relationship. That's right. We're going to mine this thing for all I can. Seriously, I have so many. There's so many. I'm so excited. This show is going to have a new life breath into it. We're going to have so many topics to get into. Absolutely. There isn't a single question that feels new to me at this point. They're all kind of like it goes in that phylum or that subsection. They're versions of each other. There are interesting still to us and we want you to send them uup at petges.com. Whatever you're going through, send it in. We love a screenshot. We love seeing underneath the hood. We like the particulars. We love specificity. Indeed. Find out what it means to me. Okay. Specificity. We want that. Need it. We chew on the bone. On this big ship. No. We want raw materials. That's right. We want the data. So send in whatever you'd like. We can answer every question that you have, but it is nice to know that we're getting into this unknown territory of relationships. I'm interested to see if your perspective on things maybe shifts or evolves. You have a big milestone coming up in your relationship, a big topic I'm sure people write in about all the time. So what are you doing after this recording? I am going to meet the family. The whole family. The whole family. Yes. The whole mishpocha. The whole like immediate family or like the whole extended family? I think the immediate family. Okay. This is the immediate. Okay. The immediate. The immediate. That's what I call them. Yes. I said immediate only for my first meeting. I had a lot. Get your cousins the fuck out of here. Get them the fuck out. Yes. I will do an immediate visit. That's it. That was what I contractually agreed to that. Aren't I a fun boyfriend? Yeah, you sound fun. Well, that's what I mean. That's where I'm headed with this is like, how do you feel going into this? Are you like nervous? Are you excited? Excited. You're pretty good with the parents, I bet. I can, I can sing, dance and dust. I can really put on a show, especially for a mom. I mean, by the end of it, I feel like I'll be snuggled between her titties and just telling her all my hopes and dreams. I hope she hears this. Boy, I really ruined it before it even began. No, it's gonna be great. Welcome to the family. Is there anything, you know, we talked about this like a while ago, but is there anything that you feel like she, like, is anything she told you warning about? Anything kind of like things that, did you tell her? Did you tell her she met your parents? So is there anything like you told her? Like, don't be... I said get running. Warning. Anything. Don't be what? A warning, anything about them. No, with my family, get in the water, jump in. You're gonna be treated as if they've known you 1700 years. Like that's kind of how it goes. I, you know, for me, I'm not, you know, I'd be, you're meeting the parents. If someone agrees to meet your family or wants to or asked to as I did, I was like, I wanted... You asked. Of course. I wanted them, let's get it going. You met my family. When can I meet yours? Let's do this. You know, oh, you can cut, you know, because we're distance. So then you have to like negotiate traveling and schedules and all those things as, and that's kind of the communication part of distance relationship of any relationship, of course. But, you know, I have no concern because I generally a respectful guy. I think I'm respectful. I generally get along with people. So I hope they don't hear that whole, you know, snuggle in their titties part. But I hope they understand this is a podcast where we make jokes. Yeah, those are concerns. You know, I don't think that there's... Like if they listen to your content, that's like a concern-ish. No. If they heard my content and had a question about it, I can answer to everything I say because I speak honestly, you know, like I... And when I... If someone's like, you just made a joke about... Like, did you say you're going to like... If we do well, you'll be in my titties? Like if that came up... So you pulled hands? Right. You pulled hands. You've got a copy you've been doing for a while. Right. Like if that was the question, I'd be like, well, you know, it's a bit, right? Like we had this... You know, like I can speak to it. No, of course, yeah. You know, so like there was a review of the book that just came out. Not to try to always be closing here, but the book was reviewed and it said that it wasn't nuanced, you know, it was saying all men and it wasn't nuanced. And I'm like, well, sorry to... You know, I can speak to that. You know, I'm happy that you said that because I believe that there isn't a lot of nuance to a man you're dating in the first few months and a man that you're dating in the first year, you know. So there's not a lot of nuance to I have made a commitment to someone. And now I'm ready for all the things that go with it. Right. You know, if someone I was dating was like, and my parents are going to be there, I would go, oh, okay, that's something I need to acknowledge. Am I ready to meet someone's parents? Am I at that mindset? Am I okay with the responsibility that comes with that? You know, and if I wasn't okay with the relationship, then I probably wouldn't be okay with that. That's why when we give advice here, when I give people things to do, it's not me telling someone to do. We're not going to say, let them. You know, like that's why that advice from my argument to Mel Robbins would be, I think you are giving advice that isn't something someone could actually use. You know, because the person that is so concerned with their dating life, they're not the type to generally just let anyone do anything. Right. You know, and see how they feel. That's just not like, but when I say, hey, you're texting with someone on and on and on, you keep texting with someone, they don't make a plan. And I say, hey, send this text. This has been a lot of fun, but I'd really like to get to know each other in person. I'm free next Tuesday and Wednesday at eight, make a plan and I'm in. Now there's the directive. You've gotten an answer. They'll make a plan or they won't. I'll meet your parents or you won't be there. He won't. So you guys are long distance. We are long distance. Right. So how do you, do you have like, how do you, what's the cadence of like when you see each other, do you have a plan? Is it just kind of like you're on tour a lot? What is your, It's kind of like a looking month to month thing. Okay. Let's look a few weeks out and see where we can come together, where maybe she can come with me to a certain location and where I could come to her. Like here's, so this, this weekend. We, we had a plan to be here taping today. So okay, I would like to go to New York, do shows, the comedy seller, wake up, do the podcast and then I'd like to come to you because she lives in Philly. Okay. And how would that work out? Oh, well, I can do that. And also my parents are home and I'd like you to meet them and they want to come to dinner with us. Great. That's kind of how the discussion happened. Okay. Now next week, now I'm going to Salt Lake City this weekend and then I go to Tempe, Arizona. That's where I am this weekend. If you're here, if you're there, come to the show, assemble the group chat. Oh, she's like, I have work stuff I can do in Arizona. Okay. Okay. Great. So why don't you come with me to Arizona and we'll have a weekend there. But you know, also while knowing that that's a work weekend and she's really, she's been good. It's been okay with respecting that. Like I do, I can't just do like us gallivanting around Tempe. Right. You know that I have to work and I have to, and again, so I want to be upfront about that because like I've been, I've been on dates where it's like you're toting someone around to like show to show and you can tell they like, is this the date? Right. Is this the vacation? Yeah. Is this the vacation? Right. And I think I have been of like, and that's expectations. The expectation of like, and I know she wouldn't do this, but I would be like, Hey, if you want to go home for the second show and not be up all night and want to like, you know, hang at the place or go do whatever you would like to do, you can do that or not come. Right. You know, I'm going to make this as good as possible, but I'm also going to like let you know, like there's other things I have to do. Like I think that's the hard part. At 41, I'm better at that than I was at 31. The hard part about doing any different career, you know, whether it be the arts or, you know, you're an entertainer, sports, whatever it is, just any different schedules. Like, Hey, like this may seem like a hang and it's fun, but like there's also like work that goes in here and that I have to do things, you know, right? So it's hard because sometimes you get in the space where it's like, and I've had this happen in the past where, Hey, I want to, you know, come to the show, but then it's like, this one I need my own brain. I can't split my thoughts. Yeah. It almost feels like with you, it doesn't matter that much that it's long distance because you're on the road anyway all the time. So it's not like if you were like me and you're living in New York and every night you're here, it's probably more of a different thing where you can see each other like casually multiple times a week. Now, like you're always traveling anyway, so you might actually see someone more. Yeah. My issue with that, my feedback to that, if like I was the, oh, you're on the road anyways. It's like, you do have to preserve your time. You know, I have to like, you know, like when I take a flight to New York and I'm like, I'm going to get three things done on the plane. If I'm with someone on that flight, I have to like, you're not getting anything done. Not getting anything done on the plane. Until you've been in a relationship for a while and then you don't need to speak to each other. Right. And, but then you set up a precedent of like a year in, well, you used to talk with me on the plane ride. Right. But a year in, you might live together and then you might be like, well, we just spoke all, you know what I mean? Listen, I, I've, and I'm trying the one thing with this is I'm trying and it's happened a couple of times where I'm almost like getting ahead of arguments I would have with an ex that I had. Okay. You're pre-fighting? I'm pre-fighting. Like, yeah, I'm like, and I'm like, I can understand why people who have, you know, who are in their thirties and forties who get in relationships that were in other long-term relationships are like, they kind of like the other, the next person kind of pays the price or gets a better version. Right. You know, it goes both ways. I, you know, like I'm like, there's some times where I'm like, hey, I have to do this show and I can't do otherwise before or I have to get my thoughts together and I've had that be like, well, why would, you know, I've been gotten in arguments about that in the past and now I'm like saying that to this person, but they don't have a problem with it. I think that's good. I think that's called you like, you're a better communicator than you used to be. Probably. That's a way to look at it. Yeah. I know I pulled this other person to this, the problems of another relationship, but I guess that's... No, I think it's a good thing. She's getting like the clearly communicating boundary setting person. You're right. I'm a fantastic boyfriend. I mean, that doesn't, nothing you're saying doesn't sound bad to me. No, I'm trying. I, you know, it would be weird to be, again, I said this in the last episode, it'd be weird to be 41 and be like, you can't be held to the same standard as a 25 year old boyfriend. Yeah. And I think that's, but I think that's the problem. A lot of the conversation around dating gets into, you know, you have these 40 year old women who are telling these younger women how trash the new guys are and you're like, they're acting like 25 year olds. You know, like I can't sit here and act like I'm on a high horse. You know, like it's easier to be a 41 year old boyfriend than it is to be a 25 year old boyfriend. Right. Well, you also know what to do. Right. I mean, I can take away credit for myself, but it's easier to be, you know, have disposable income and, you know, a career in a direction that I like. And that's kind of what I wanted. That's why, you know, again, like looking back at not getting into a relationship before, you know, when you're trying to figure out your career, that's just one thing that was like always on my mind. And I've kind of just, I'm a little bit more at peace with that. Yeah. I think that's great. And timing is part of it. Right. Is I think a big part of it. It's underrated part of it. What are we talking about today? Let's get into our episode. Let's get into our episode before we do. I am on the road as comfortable as I am in my career. We have some tickets to sell and I want you to come to a show. You know, West Hampton, I'm coming this summer. I'll be there. Jordana's going to be there. I haven't seen your set yet. I know. You got to see it. I'm in the process of really like getting into the set right now. I had one set that was an hour and 20 minutes. I'm chopping it in half and concentrating on the beginning. Is that the better half? I would imagine. It's just different. Okay. It's a different subject. There are two different subjects. Okay. The second half I think is about my relationship life and stuff I'm going through now. So I'm like, I got to like work that out. So I'm on the road. If you're listening right now, Tempe, Arizona. I'm also going to be in St. Louis, Missouri and Norah walk, Connecticut, Las Vegas, Nevada, Los Angeles, California. Jacksonville never been there for shows. Austin and then West Hampton Beach, Portland, Maine. That's the calendar, jaredfree.com for the tickies. Also walking red flag, the book. Yes. Check it out. Just pre-order it. I made an announcement last time. If you pre-order it and buy it for a friend, I'll send a cameo. I'll send me the receipt over DM and then tell me a little bit about you and the friend and I'll make a video. You better have hundreds of thousands of cameos. I would love to have that be my biggest problem. I want to be a New York Times bestseller. That's my new dream. I love it. Let's do it. I think it's going to happen for you. And good boyfriend. Wow. I want to be both. Oh, that's so sweet. Look at you. That's right. That's right. Jared's turning into a little cheese ball. That's right. That's me. I love it.哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎 All right, hi, J and J, feather, feather. Love the pod, I'll get right into it. I'm a 34 year old female and single living in Hollywood, California. I'm fairly extroverted and have good luck meeting men in the wild because I have a really cute dog who introduces me to cute fellow dog owners. Totally get that. I recently met this guy who lives across the street from me because we've been out walking our dogs around the same times every so often. He's German, which I have been learning on Duolingo for the past year. Okay, what a coincidence. That's kinda random. Yeah, that's weird. Oh, that's probably what that guy's them talking. Yeah. He's like, ein dum dog for a walk. And she's like, ein frau dog. Frau. Mrs. Dog. I'm frau dog. Well, your German is really impeccable. Thank you. Yeah, I can tell you've been doing so. See my schnauzer. And I admit I'm a sucker for an accent. It's interesting. I think of the German accent as like sexy. I would think of it. Well, I don't think I did a lot of justice just now. I don't think you did, but it's very, I mean, my grandparents, my dad's parents were like German from Germany. And they sounded like terrifying. Really? It was not like. This is a scary one. Yeah, it was like your father is gaining a lot of weight. I'd be like, oh my God, you're terrifying me. I didn't know there were the dean from a school that you send your kids away to. That's what I'm saying. Your fasa has been gaining weight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It sounded a little bit like a horror movie, but you know, love the Germans totally. Who's your fasa? That could be sexy. There you go. Yeah. Anyway, she likes a German accent, not for me, but to be to their own. We met a couple of times. But for every seat. We met a couple of times before you. Keister for every Ein seat. Is it Keister? What does Ein mean? The? The. The. I'm sorry. I keep it a rope. Okay. We met a couple of times before he finally asked for my Instagram. Wow. He asked for her Instagram. That's a right flag. Yeah. Everything is really making sense here. I should mention I'm also a model and I shoot mostly Ecom campaign and social media for content and social media content for brands. That's very LA. Very LA, very like new age version of JC Penney model. I could see that. You know, it's like, you know, I just do some. Some light chair modeling. Right. This is, yeah, I'm a model, but I don't do. Giselle runway. Right. I'm catalog. Catalog. That's right. Okay. I wouldn't say I look like your typical Instagram model, but I have more of that girl next door vibe. After a few weeks of following each other on social and chatting a couple of times since then, he asked me to go to a bar for drinks. I said yes. The next day I posted a photo of some new glasses that a brand sent me to promote in exchange for commission. So I attached a very simple link because I'm honestly, because honestly I ordered the wrong prescription, but they were cute. So I posted about them anyway. I don't know if that's relevant, but very nice. Okay. Good for you. His response really icked me out. And she attaches the screenshot. I'm looking at the picture of her. Okay. And yeah, daddy like. She's got some cleavage. She's got some, I mean, she didn't, she's cute and she's definitely, she's. Would you call this a sexual picture? Yes and no. Okay. No, because she has some. Glasses on? Well, she has some, what's it called? When you, she has some deniability. You can't, unless. Because of the link? Well, the link, but also I'm just taking a picture. And oh, my titties are there. Okay. Do you know what I mean? Like, oh, little cleavage. It's not like she wearing a bikini and she's like posing. Right. This is the picture that we all take where we know we look good, but we don't want it. We're not saying we look good. And, and someone writes you, oh, thirst trap. And you're like, come on, really? Me? Right. This is one of those pictures. And she may even be hearing me and getting icked out by me saying that because now I'm taking her inside the mind of the man who icked her out. But I'm saying when I see this picture, it is sure there's glasses there, but like, and then also she didn't just take a picture. Like she took it, retook it, took it again. And then, you know, like made sure the lighting was right. She's facing a window like. Sure, she looks good. She looks good. But I'm saying this is like. Yeah. I know what her thought process is. I've done it too. Right. And to her, the thought process is I want to look good. And to the men, men watching who are attracted to her would go as a hot pick of a girl I think is hot. Right. You know, so. Simple as that. You know, again, we're like one road away from like where she wants everyone to be thinking. Most men are. You know, you're one standard deviation where I'm like, you know, I don't look at that picture and go, she really looks put together and oh my God, what a dewy, dewy glowy gloss she's put on. She looks like girlfriend material. That's what she wants you to think. And that's not what we're thinking. We're saying. She looks like someone I could really be with. No, no, no, no, no. I'm looking at this. Have you ever thought that? But I would do titties on the. Have you ever seen a picture of a woman and thought that? Like is that something that women just think men might think? Never thought that. Never thought. Never been like that. I could really be with her. I could be my girlfriend. No? No, I think she looks great. That'd probably be as nice as like normal as I would be. Oh, she looks good. Oh, whoa. Oh, shit. Okay. Oh, whoa. Ball's moved. I wanna go on a date with her. Well, it's not that. Right. It always starts with, oh, oh, oh, shit. Right. First you check in, as you say, with the penis. The penis is a strong dictator and will not allow you on a date that he doesn't wanna go on. Right. So that's the first barrier to get through. First, that is just imagine when I'm looking at Instagram or any guy, it's their penis just looking at it, just going, I, you can come in now. It's a bouncer. It's the bouncer. It is the bouncer, right. So, but I do understand where she, like again, that is not up to her to teach a guy. Right. To go back, to make this more, to make me a feminist. Of course. It's not up to her to be like, you're just, this is just what you're getting. It's like taking your net and swat and putting it out at the back of the boat. You're gonna get fish, but you're also gonna get tires and metal rods and, you know. All the scum of the ocean. Right. Okay. All right, so she posts this picture and he responds. So he responds to her picture of her with the cleavage and the glasses. See, even the order I put it in, the cleavage and the glasses. You disappointed a lot of people with this link, laughing face emoji, laughing face emoji, laughing face emoji. Huh? Why? New glasses, duh. It looked like only fans link. Okay, so she writes. It's like the most disappointing response. I know. Cause her being like, well, her being like, glasses, duh, you're being delusional. I would not know what he was talking about though, with like, with the link. No, no, no, no, I agree with you. I wouldn't be like, I would be a little confused as to like, what do you mean, where did you think this link was going? Right. Like there's ways to compliment someone's looks without. No, this is insane. That. I don't know why you would do that, right? For him to even mention, you don't mention only fans. The first rule is only fans. Right. The only fans is one of those things. I even hear like guys talk about it, like I was on, like I heard a guy recently, he was like, I was on her only fans and I, you know, I'm now off it. I'm like, I can't believe he said that out loud. Is that something like a lot at most people have? I don't know. Or under, do men look at, do men, have you ever seen someone's only fans? I'm not a member of anyone's only fans. And I just kind of thought that was like a. Don't ask, don't tell thing. Yeah, I heard, I'm trying to think back when I heard it, but I have this like weird memory of like, someone being like, oh, I was on that only fans and I had to get off or, you know, my time was done there. Like, I don't know. This might be disappointing every woman who's listening. I'm just saying it is a thing being used. Right. I'm sure. Especially by content creators in LA. Right. And being used by maybe your boyfriend. Okay. So I'm saying like the idea that like ever, all these people have only fans link and no one's subscribing, people are subscribing. Like this is a real business for people. Yeah. People make a lot of money in there. Okay. So she writes, his response really icked me out. I'm a curvier girl with proportional boobs. So men tend to sexualize me, but I make a point not to share any photos that are too revealing on Instagram. And he only sees me when I've just rolled out of bed. So Iki or picky, a man assumes I'm an only fans model because I share my work on social media. I think, listen, I'm not here. I don't think it's hard to respond to because I kind of disagree with her perspective. I wouldn't see her right. I mean, she's- Do you think this is her just sharing her work on social media? I'm not saying she deserves. Right. This isn't me being like low cut shirt. You were asking for it. I'm just saying you got a gross response, you're turned off, that's okay, but like let's not be shocked here. I think yes and no. I don't think women think about how disgusting men are. Right. Like that often. I just don't, like to me, I don't think about cleavage that much. When I see another woman's cleavage, I don't think about it that much. I wasn't like the first, I first noticed the glasses as opposed to you. So I do think there's a little plausible deniability here. She's like a little, like I think she thinks she looks great, but I think she also, they might think her like face looks nice. Like I don't necessarily think she's- Again, and I'm not looking at this picture going, like I'm joking a little bit going, oh titties, titties, titties. But I look at this picture, I go this is a picture where she's looking sexy. Right. I don't look at this picture and go, oh my God, this ad for glasses. Right. I might as a woman who's not looking at her boobs, but I can see what you're saying. I'm saying I'm not just looking, again, I've made 30 million jokes about her boobs. I'm just saying I look at this again, men are like bees. Right. You know, with our eyesight, just like you squint a little and you get a little fuzzy. Hot girl, hottie. Him mentioning only fans is like crazy to me. Oh. Kitty. Kitty. A great story like Monsters Inc. stays with you forever. And Disney Plus is where you'll find your next great story. From the return of the award-winning hit series, Rivals. Welcome to the naughtiest show on television. To the unmissable crime drama, High Potential. Gotta dead body, gotta go. A lifetime of great stories awaits. This spring on Disney Plus, 18 Plus, subscription required. Tee's and see's apply. This episode is brought to you by Expedia and Visit Scotland. Start your story in Scotland. Experience the pool of wide untamed landscapes and fresh cuisine that feels rooted in place. Discover castles steeped in legend and feel the genuine warmth from locals you meet in a place that will stay with you long after you leave. Start planning your own Scottish holiday today at Expedia.co.uk slash Visit Scotland. I was trying to think of how Onlyfans could come up naturally. And I couldn't really think of whether, like how could Onlyfans come up and a guy could bring it up? Like, do you know what I mean? Where it wouldn't be weird. Because any mention of Onlyfans, you're just basically saying, I wanna fuck you. Right, and that's what he's saying. Right. It is perfectly normal for her to be like icked out and be like, I don't wanna go out with him. Now you know exactly what he's after. He is not looking for a date. He looked for, you know, and there were clues. He asked for your Instagram. He didn't ask for your number. He never made a plan. Oh, now he's responding to Instagram stories. This guy is as hacky as they come. We've seen this before. There's been clues, agreed. So the fact that he said it is almost a blessing. Right, you don't have to wonder. Maybe he just like wanted to see my Instagram. Anyone who asks for your Instagram before your number is not trying to seriously date you. Not at all. Trying to fuck you, trying to keep it about what Instagram's about, which is the looks, the pictures, the no depth. You know, Instagram doesn't offer depth. I know your caption was really well written, but no one read it. We looked at the hot picture where, oh my God, look at them titties. Maybe she'll suck me off. Wow, there we go. Okay, yeah. That's the reality. I'm sorry to shock everyone in this room. What is going through his mind when he sends that, that, what is his logic when he's like, you disappointed a lot of people with this link? Like what is he hoping happens there? I guess you just, what does he hope? You, when he says you're disappointed a lot of people with that link, it's not only fans. That's him saying you disappointed me. I was really hoping to see you naked. Right. And would you like to come over after the dog park one day and maybe roll around like those dogs do. So he's shooting his shot at that. This was his like side door version of come over and blow me without any responsibility. So sweet. Here are the ways I'd bring up. Let me, these are ways I bring up only fans. Okay. And tell me if it's weird. I have a cousin who has only fans. Crazy, right? Would that be weird? Were you on the topic? We're on the date. Okay. You mentioned your cousin, I go, you know my cousin has only fans? Isn't that crazy? It's doable. It's doable? Yeah. Okay. Maybe you want to talk business. Well, okay. So the only fans. I would ask how much they made. Okay. Right. We go into that direction. Yeah. Okay. The guy from only fans, the guy who created it has just passed. You know that? No, I didn't know that. So he just passed. Hugh Hefner of only fans. The Hugh Hefner of only fans. So we're talking about that. You know, only, and then I say this, only fans is a platform where I cheer for them, but I don't think I could get over the hump to actually pay for an account. What's the hump? I'm paying for this very feeling, personal relationship with them. Would that be weird for me to say? I think it would still be. Or what date are we on? Two. No, too early for the only fans. Too early to think about you purchasing only fans. What if he said this, to people assume you have an only fans because you model, that has to be tough to not be taken seriously. That sounds nice. That's nice. Yeah, but is that actually skeevy? It's a little skeevy. Yeah. I don't know, I was thinking, I was like, is there any way to mention this? You're so hot, you could be an only fans model. People would pay for your... Not like a cover model or anything. You're not that hot, but like only fans, sure. JC Penney, catalog, and only fans, absolutely. Definitely you, yeah. I would only subscribe to an only fans of a family member to support their business. Or a woman I met, or a woman that I frequent her Instagram account. No. No, you can't say that. Okay, so we try. Okay, now we know. All right, listen. To her, this is a runaway, not a walk away. Or if you wanna hook up, that's what he's looking for. Yeah, if that's what you're looking for. And that's why everything he's doing is trying to hook up with you. Right, it all leads to, let me see you naked. Let's do another email. All right. 29 year old virgin and heated rivalry. Jordan and Jared, first, let me say, is firstly a word? I think so. Firstly. First of all, let me start by saying I love the podcast would love your take on my current situation. I've been seeing a guy for about four months. He has a lot of qualities that I want in a long-term partner. I really like him and spending time with him. The issue is we haven't gotten past making out. He shared with me he's never had sex with anyone. And I was taken aback by this, but assured him, it's okay and we can do whatever feels right. That was a month ago. We still haven't progressed past a heavy make out sesh. At this point, I don't feel like I'm in an adult relationship. It's giving 15 first boyfriend vibes. I also can't help but think there's something else going on. He's not telling me, not to mention he was also very interested in heated rivalry. What are your thoughts on this? Am I putting too much weight into this? What do you think? So she's asking us if he won't have sex with her because he's gay? I guess so. Which he's like flying? That seems to be what she's insinuating. Right. But here's the thing. If you're looking to be in a more sexual relationship and this person is very sexually inexperienced and not looking for that, it's okay to not want to date them. Right. It doesn't mean you need to speculate on why. It doesn't mean, it could be for a number of reasons. Right. But I think the only thing that matters here is she wants to be with someone who's more sexual. This guy isn't that sexual with her. You and I are on the same page. I think she's doing what a lot of women do is need a reason for why it didn't work out so that they're not considered an unlovable cat lady. I think it's also like you don't wanna feel like you threw away a good guy. Sure. So you need to kinda like villainize him. Right. And it's like, cause what you're saying is it's two different things. Right. Is he gay? Not your problem. That goes under the category of not for something for you to deal with. Right. You don't need to investigate it. You don't need to look for clues. You just have to say is he meeting whatever needs that I want and which sounds like he's not. Right. You want a guy who's looking to get a little freaky with you and explore parts of your body that have never been explored. And we encourage that on this show. So find your guy, your Marco Polo, that can explore your body in a way that's respectful and delicious. Love it. That is the going motto of this podcast. I love it. A delicious, respectful time. Something for you guys to think about. Delicious and respectful. That's my new merch. You gonna get a hat? DNR. Delicious and respectful. Do not resuscitate. No, yeah. I think what she's doing is immature. This is like, you know, again, you know, the, and he loves, this is funny. Something she can talk about at the brunch table. And it's fun fodder. Right. It was, you know, it was weird how much he was into that, but it's not about, I don't think you need to figure that out with him. Right. I'm proud that you would like to get off with a guy that you trust and have fun with. This ain't that guy. Yep. It's over. We saw him dating again. We did it. We'll be back next week. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom.