Bonus: How to Make Progress on What Matters to You (Even If You Feel Stuck) with Mimi Bouchard

Hey, it's Hasan Minhaj here from the Hasan Minhaj Doesn't Know podcast, among other things. And I hate the smell of rotting food almost as much as I hate wasting it in the first place. Thankfully, now I have Mill. Mill is a food recycler that is odorless, guiltless, and completely effortless. See, I've always wanted to reduce my food waste. It is one of the easiest ways for an individual to make a big impact on the environment. But I just cannot stand the mess of a compost bin in the kitchen. But with Mill, all you do is drop in your scraps and you let it go. It works quickly and quietly, turning your food, even small bones, into nutrient-rich grounds. Now I take out the trash way less, yet my kitchen smells way better. And I don't have to feel guilty when my zucchini gets moldy. Plus, it looks cool. Yeah, this trash can alternative is so fly, people keep asking me, where I got the giant Alexa? It's chic and savvy, but you have to live with Mill to really get it. Good thing you can try it risk-free for 90 days right now and get $75 off with code HMDK. Visit mill.com slash HMDK. That is mill.com slash HMDK. Lately, Jamie and I have been on a little flavor tour at Whole Foods Market. Instead of making the same three dinners over and over, we wander the aisles and pick a region to visit. It makes dinners feel less predictable. Last week, we leaned Mediterranean. Another time, we swung Latin-inspired. And we always keep San Pellegrino on hand because it instantly makes it feel like more of a fancy meal. Yeah, I love that at Whole Foods Market, you can really see the savings. Explore the store for yellow signs. You'll find them aisle after aisle, highlighting sales and everyday low-priced items with the same high quality. Get inspired to try something new. And if you truly don't want to cook, that's me, the prepared food section saves me. Empanadas or burritos and dinner is just handled. Whole Foods Market makes it easy to take it easy when it's dinner time. Save on regional flavors at Whole Foods Market. Lemonada. Hello and welcome to a bonus episode of the Happier Podcast. Hey, Elizabeth. Hi, Gretchen. So if you're listening in real time, tomorrow is February 28th, which we call Determination Day. By the end of February, research shows that many people have abandoned their New Year's resolutions, and some people call this Discouragement Day, but we reframe it. We call it Determination Day because it's a good time to reevaluate, rethink resolutions, find a different approach, and just stay determined to stick to resolutions. So it's Determination Day. And today, Gretz, you are talking to someone whose work connects directly to Determination Day. Yes. Today, I'm talking with Mimi Bouchard, who created the popular app called Activations. And this app is really unique. I was interested in her work because it highlights a problem we talk about all the time, which is like, okay, you really want to make a change in your life. You really want to do it, but what you've tried isn't working, it hasn't worked, or it hasn't stuck. So what do you do? It makes me think about how many times you tried meditation before you decided it just was not for you. Exactly. So, you know, meditation is a great tool for some people. No tool fits every hand. Meditation just did not work for me. I didn't want to calm my mind. I didn't want to discipline my mind. I wanted to let my mind off the leash. and one of the things that really caught my attention was that Mimi designed this app as an alternative to meditation. So this is guided audio. You don't carve out special time. You listen to it while you're already doing other things like I listen to it on Walking Barnaby and Taffy for instance and I thought it was such an interesting idea that we have actually partnered with Activations for this episode. So if anyone wants to try the app for themselves just go to activations.com slash happier for an exclusive 14-day free trial and a major discount on subscriptions. Gretchen, I know you're planning to ask her about thoughts on manifesting. So my interest has peaked because, you know, I believe I'm a manifester. I will be listening closely from the sidelines. Yes, the way she talks about it is so interesting. So all right, Elizabeth, I'll let you go and we'll jump in. Mimi, welcome. Thanks for having me, Gretchen. And I'm so excited for our conversation. Yes, we are interested in so many of the same things. We can really get into it. Yes, we really can. So Alyssa and I were just talking about Determination Day, which is this day, you know, February 28th, because people tend to struggle with their New Year's resolutions. They give them up. And so we say Determination Day is a day to re-engage with your resolutions and start again. Now, in your work, what have you noticed about how people tend to feel around this time, behave around this time? You know, it's the end of February. They've been working with these resolutions for a while. What do you observe? What do you think is going on around this period? I think that a lot of people just can't ignore that quiet pull inside of them that says, I am meant for more. I want to create a better life for myself. and I want to feel more energized. I want to feel happier. I know that there is more for me in this one life. I think that is the truth when it comes down to New Year's resolutions, trying to create a better life for ourselves. So many of us come face to face with this reality that we want to change something. So a lot of us, you know, we fall off track and by determination day, we have this realization, okay, I can get back on the bandwagon. I just need to learn to do the things that will actually be consistent that I can stick to and not be so hard on myself. There are so many things that we can do to create this big, beautiful life for ourselves that does not drag us down and feel very difficult and heavy and sticky. And I'm so excited to share all about that today. But it's a very interesting time because people are coming face to face with their potential. Well, I mean, your own story sort of illustrates what you just said. Like you were working super hard. You had, you know, managing like four different jobs and still you felt like you were struggling to accomplish all the things you wanted to accomplish. So looking back on that time, what do you think was happening? Well, I just wasn't aligned with the identity of my future self. And I say this term future self, it's essentially your best self, your favorite self, the version of you that you want to be. Okay. So you can live your future now. Whenever I say the term future self, know that you can live your future now. So back in the day, almost a decade ago, I was in a very different place in my life and I was struggling financially. I wanted to become an entrepreneur and I was failing at that. I was struggling with my health and my body. My finances were just not where I wanted them to be. I was numbing out a lot, whether that was scrolling too much on my phone, overeating, over drinking. I didn't feel confident. I was working on myself in the classic ways, trying to meditate and journal and stuff, but I just couldn't break through to that next level. So what I had to come to realize is that my identity was not aligned with my future self vision of Mimi, the Mimi I wanted to be. So that's when all of the work started changing, when I started to do the things that helped me be that future self version of myself in the moment and learn and familiarize myself with how it feels to be that version of myself, that's really the unlock that shifted everything. I love the idea of the future self. I think it's such a powerful idea. In a lot of different ways, people can invoke that. How did you get in touch with what was that perfect? Well, no, I shouldn't say perfect. Perfect is such a loaded word. That future self that you really yearned for, how did you get in touch with that? You know, it really just came down to this like deep intuitive pull. I had this little voice inside of me when I was living that old life that just said I was meant for more. I knew that I deserved to be happier, feel better about myself, feel confident and, you know, at peace every day with the life that I was building. I knew that and I had that little voice and I really think all of us have that little intuitive voice inside of us that gets loud if you decide to listen to it. So that was kind of the breaking point when I decided, okay, I need to change something. But to answer your question about how I got that clarity, journaling was a really big thing for me. Just putting pen to paper is the most incredible tip that I suggest to everyone that is on day one of trying to change something in their life. Put pen to paper. It's a free practice. You can open up your journal, get a piece of paper and a pen, and just free write. Write this vision of who you want to be. Create clarity on the five pillars of your life. I talk about the five pillars in my book, Activate Your Future Self. You have your mental pillar, financial pillar, physical pillar, social pillar, and spiritual pillar. Do an audit of your life. You just need a pen and paper. So that was a really big part of my transformation. is the first step is for any transformation is getting clear, is clarity. And then the second step is becoming her, becoming that version of yourself that you want to be and living it now before that life comes into play. Trusting the process and having faith that if you can show up as your future self before that life that you desire happens, that's going to get you there faster and in a way that's more enjoyable. Mm hmm. Well, so what did work for you? I know that you said reading self-help didn't work. Meditation wasn't a useful tool for you. Not a useful tool for me. What is the approach that works for you? It was kind of the craziest thing Gretchen because as you mentioned I was trying at this point in my life I was truly doing it all I was trying to force the habits that everyone says you should do especially meditation And listen, I have nothing against meditation. I think it's great if you want to calm your nervous system and clear your head and de-stress. It's an amazing practice for that. But I was noticing when I tried to force myself to sit down and meditate, it just wasn't doing what I actually intuitively was craving in this phase of transformation in my life. I was craving a practice that made me feel alive, not calm me down. Can I just say, I feel exactly the same way. And I think this is a really important point. Meditation is a wonderful tool, but no tool fits every hand and it doesn't work for everybody. And I think maybe you've seen this. People really blame themselves. They're like, well, what's wrong with me? Everybody says meditation is so great. So I think it's very comforting to think, well, maybe meditation doesn't work for you, or maybe meditation isn't what you need. Like, you don't need to calm your mind. A lot of your activations are about different kinds of aims that you're trying to bring into your mind and into your life. And so you've got a different kind of practice because you've got a different kind of aim or you've got a different kind of temperament. Yes, exactly. So this is how I ended up creating this new type of audio activations. This was almost a decade ago. I was trying all the things to transform. And I just, I really wanted a radically different life. And I wanted to feel more alive and awake and clear every day. The meditation just wasn't aligning. It wasn't giving me that feeling that I was seeking. I wanted something that would just turn up the dial of feeling alive and excited about life and motivated towards my goals, right? So one, I remember the day so clearly, Gretchen. It was the beginning of my new life. I was sitting in my small studio apartment at the time. I was living in London. And I decided intuitively just to take out my phone. I was reading a lot about the neuroscience of visualization and how certain words and listening to certain type of content really helps you visualize and transform and create a new identity, right? So I was doing a ton of research. I love researching. I love learning. And I whipped out my phone and I just intuitively decided to press record on the voice memo app on my phone. And I just described the life that I wanted to live. Like it was in the present moment. Like this is already who I was. And then I listened to it and it was good, but it needed more. So I uploaded it onto my computer, onto my garage band. And I started layering in this like cinematic dramatic movie moment, inspirational, you know, raw, beautiful music that I would find on YouTube. And then that was, I didn't know it at the time, but the first activation, I did this practice and I created dozens of these for myself for years without ever telling anyone. My life started changing, Gretchen. It was like this bell curve on a graph. You know, before I started listening to activations, the growth was so slow and just not actually hitting. And then the moment that I started listening to these visualization audios in everyday moments with my eyes open while I was walking to work, while I was cooking dinner, while I was getting ready in the morning. It was this bell curve of growth on a graph, you know, when the bell curve goes whoop, goes right up. And my life started radically changing in every way, shape, and form. And there's so much science now that I've, you know, done all the digging and research and spoken to specialists to understand why. Well, I have to intervene. If anybody knows my four tendencies framework, Mimi, I happen to know that you are a questioner. So you're like, I love to do research. I love to customize. I love to make things efficient and get what I want. This is like very questioner of you. So, okay. But I digress. Okay. You're doing all this research. Yeah. I'm a questioner through and through. I, you know, I challenge the norm. I always try to think there's a better way. There's the faster way. I love a shortcut and who doesn't? I love hacking the system in a way where it's like, how can I get this done faster and more enjoyably and just better than the other way, right? So really activations was birthed from that need of wanting to feel alive and energized. But also, I was busy. As you mentioned, I was working four jobs trying to make ends meet while I was also trying to create my first entrepreneurial venture and online magazine at the time. And I was busy. I was really just running around. So I didn't really have time to even carve out 20 minutes a day to try to meditate. So I decided to habit stack listening to these activations. I would listen to them, like I mentioned, you know, in everyday moments, getting ready, cooking, cleaning. And the craziest thing, Gretchen, is that that actually made them more effective. We've all heard of the Pavlov's dog theory. Pavlov rings the bell, the dog salivates. I was essentially taking advantage of classical conditioning in real time. Every morning when I brush my teeth, if I listened to a two-minute activation, soon enough, I don't even need that activation to feel confident and energized and motivated. So it's really, that's one of the reasons why this new type of audio helps you, you know, transform a certain area of your life quite quickly. So you internalize the activation so deeply that you didn't even need to have the cue anymore. You just are like, oh, this is the time when I listen to my get clear on where you're going activation. Oh, that's so interesting. So I've been listening to activations while I go on a walk because I live in New York City, so I'm walking constantly or when I walk my dogs. So if you're curious, I've been using the same version that you can get in the show description. So if you want to hear what I've been listening to, just check that out. Coming up, we'll have more about activations with Mimi Bouchard. But first, this break. These days, I am all about quality over quantity, especially in my closet. If it is not well-made and versatile, it is just not worth it to me. And that is why, Gretchen, I love quints. The fabrics feel elevated, the cuts are thoughtful, and the pricing actually makes sense. You know, Gretchen, I can't live without my Quince, my Golian cashmere sweaters, but I also love their t-shirts. Their cotton poplin is crisp and holds its shape. I can wear everything season after season. And I love that these pieces are consistently rated 4.5 to 5 stars by thousands of customers. Right now, go to quince.com slash Gretchen for free shipping and 365-day returns. That's a full year to wear it and love it, and you will. Now available in Canada too. Don't keep settling for clothes that don't last. Go to quince.com slash Gretchen for free shipping and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash Gretchen. Are you a trailblazer, a risk taker, someone with countless tales of epic adventure? Well, I'm not quite there yet. but I'm working on it. Even the boldest among us started small, daring themselves to reach greater goals each day. If you're looking to take on a challenge like that, the Defender is too. It's a vehicle built for those capable of great things, whether you're charting new territory or just escaping the city for the weekend. The Defender, engineered to meet challenges head-on so you can explore with confidence. An icon reimagined, designed for a new generation of explorers. Choose from the Defender 90, 110, or 130, seeding up to eight adventurers. With a tough-tested exterior, a modern and functional interior, and intelligent tech, like 3D surround cameras and the Pivi Pro infotainment system, every journey feels limitless. Because like you, the Defender is capable of great things. Build your Defender today at LandRoverUSA.com. Lately, Jamie and I have been on a little flavor tour at Whole Foods Market. Instead of making the same three dinners over and over, we wander the aisles and pick a region to visit. It makes dinners feel less predictable. Last week, we leaned Mediterranean. Another time, we swung Latin-inspired. And we always keep San Pellegrino on hand because it instantly makes it feel like more of a fancy meal. Yeah, I love that at Whole Foods Market, you can really see the savings. Explore the store for yellow signs. you'll find them aisle after aisle, highlighting sales and everyday low-priced items with the same high quality. Get inspired to try something new. And if you truly don't want to cook, that's me, the prepared food section saves me. Empanadas or burritos and dinner is just handled. Whole Foods Market makes it easy to take it easy when it's dinner time. Save on regional flavors at Whole foods market. There's starting to be a lot of audio products now, which is fantastic. How would you say that Activations, the app, is different from other guided audio apps? What distinguishes it? Yeah. So Activations is a new type of audio and it's an alternative to meditation. So the differences are that Activations are very energizing and motivational. None of them make you think about nothing. You know, the voice is not very meditative. It's kind of a mix between a motivational podcast, cinematic music that just inspires you, and, you know, like visualization, guided visualization. And you can listen to these in everyday moments. That's the trick. We actually have a team of incredible audio engineers and composers that create some of the most incredible music to put into these activations. And music has a way of making you feel a certain way, right? Yes. It's one of the quickest, easiest ways to intervene in mood and energy is listening to music. So again, if you're saying like, how do I do this quickly and easily and most efficiently get where I'm going? It's like you harness the power of music. It's changing your state. And once you change your state and you change how you feel and you can just instantly tweak how you feel into feeling like your future self that is where real change starts to happen So it essentially just telling yourself instructing yourself to feel confident and happy And a lot of these composers that we work with, they make beautiful compositions for movies and TV shows. So they know how to get the listener to feel a certain way after listening to this certain music. So we tell all of our audio team, listen, every activation, the intention is that we want all the music and and the drops and everything to make the listener feel like they are the main character of their life and that they are moving forward in this forward momentum towards their dream life. Every activation in some way, shape or form needs to make the listener feel that way. And we have over 800 activations on the app now. So there's literally something for everyone. But then I like the way it's in different categories. Like I often do the ones that are walking, you know, so they are meant for walking, but there's other categories that you And I like that sometimes it says like the music is cinematic or calming because sometimes you want it cinematic, but then sometimes you want it to be calming. So it's nice that you can really suit what you want right then. There's so much to choose from. It's very hyper specific. So it's not like a different audio app. Well, activations is kind of one in its own. And then you have, you know, meditation apps. Then you have like motivational podcasts that you can listen to. Activations are hyper specific. It's the only app where you can listen to feel radically more confident and aligned with your goals while you're getting ready in the morning. Well, one thing is I like the fact that you know the length of it, because I think it's very frustrating to listen to something and then like, oh, I'm done walking my dogs, but I still have like four minutes to go. So it's nice that you can see, oh, this one's 10 minutes and this one's 16 minutes. You can factor that in as well. But one of the things I was thinking is that I'm really interested in titles, book titles, painting titles. I'm always just really, really interested in titles. And I think that part of the value of something like this is even by choosing what you want and seeing words setting forth your aim for yourself. Because sometimes we kind of have a vague aim, but we haven't really spelled it out. One of them, like, evening stroll to reflect and unwind. That just puts me in a certain kind of mood. Or like, energetic reset to feel alive and manifest with ease. That's a totally different vibe. Or get clear on where you're going. Or what's the one? I listened to this one. And it was like, get focused in confidence before an important meeting. Or so I was like extremely specific. But I was like, if you were heading into like a really, I don't have meetings like that in my kind of work. Writers, we don't have like urgent board meetings. But I could imagine that even choosing the words to describe what you want, it's that visualization. It's an aid because it helps you get specific and clarity, even by which tile you press on the screen is sort of a declaration of intention. and that's setting you off in the right way than to listen for the nine minutes or 16 minutes or whatever that's coming. Exactly. And visualization is just one of the things that helps you change so quickly. Recently, the University of Exeter, I have my team, we're always doing research on visualization and just the real science behind how this works so well. And recently, the University of Exeter came out with saying that just 10 minutes of daily future self-visualization, increased self-belief that I can handle this feeling, that confidence by 27%. So you'll feel more confident, resilient, and capable just by doing 10 minutes a day. And the beautiful thing is, is that our subconscious is always listening. So even if you just play it in the background, even if you're walking your dog in the morning and you're listening to a walking activation and you're saying hi to your neighbors, like just having it embed into your subconscious is such a huge benefit because our subconscious is what determines our RAS, our reticular activating system. And that's essentially a filtration system in all of our brains that decides what we consciously notice or don't notice. So what we are listening to even subconsciously is affecting that filtration pattern. So if you're telling yourself every day, I am confident, I love myself, I'm radiating confidence and happiness and health, and I am a happy person, if you're telling that to yourself, you're going to start finding reasons why that's true. Just like if you're thinking of buying a red car, you start seeing it everywhere. That's the RAS in action. So the same thing goes. If you start to embed beautiful, positive thoughts into your brain, you're going to start finding reasons why that's true. But the opposite is also right. If you keep telling yourself that you're a failure, that you're not good enough, that you could never do this and that you're a victim. You're going to find reasons to prove that. That's how the RAS works. So we're training our brains when we listen to this feel-good visualization audio. Well, and one of the things that's great about it is when it comes to trying to form a habit or trying to be consistent with an action, having something that's really convenient really matters. Like there's hilarious research about how sensitive to convenience we are. So just having it in your pocket with you all the time is so important. Pairing, I bet a lot of people do pairing. So pairing is when like, whenever I'm walking my dog, I listen to this podcast, or whenever I'm watching this TV show, I'm on the treadmill or whatever it might be. This is the kind of thing like you can be like, oh, when I walk my dog, that's the time when I do this, or when I'm cleaning up before meals, or when I'm cooking is when I do this, or when I'm commuting is when I do this. It's easy because it just sort of slips right in. Because with a lot of things, And maybe this is part of the strength of activations is we have things that we want and that we even think are important to us. And then we just sort of forget about them. I'm astonished by how I'm like, I simply forgot that I wanted to whatever. And so I think any kind of regular practice that's easy to keep up, that keeps you like laser focused on what is it that you want anyway? What is it that you're doing for your future self anyway? I love that. I actually just listened right before this. I do one activation a day usually just to kind of feel my best. And right before this, I was listening to the activation. Remind yourself of your potential. There you go. And it's just a reminder because you know deep down your potential. You know that sparkly feeling deep in your soul that you can tune into sometimes that just feels like you are present and alive and every color around you is just more clear and crisp and you're just feeling truly alive and excited about life. That's what I believe activations really does. It kind of turns that on inside of you on demand. So that's such a good point, Gretchen, is that reminding yourself. We all have these big goals and we forget. How do we forget? How do we forget? We're just remembering every day who we want to be and why. And what's our why? Because having a strong why is such a big part of this. Okay, there goes questionnaire. Questioners are like, I have to know why. But everybody wants to know why. Nobody wants to do things that are arbitrary or make no sense. But yeah, that need to know why is very powerful, especially for questioners. And I think there's a universal why. That is personally my strongest why. And every time I share this why, everybody is very aligned with it. Everyone I speak to is very aligned with it. And that is we have one beautiful life. And sometimes to change, we need to come face to face with our mortality. And I know it can sound grim sometimes, but really stay with me. If you can just remember that we have this one beautiful chance at life and we don't get a rerun. This is not a dress rehearsal. We have this one chance and we don't know if tomorrow is promised. If we can remember that in the forefront of our minds every single day, that is my why. Is that I don't want to spend my one life not feeling good. I don't want to spend my one life feeling regret that I didn't do that thing, that I didn't step up for myself, that I didn't try that big goal that I had, that I didn't put myself out there because I was scared of what people would think, right? That's not the one life that I want to experience. I don't want to ever feel regret when I'm on my deathbed. And I think everyone can connect with that. So really, that's a wake-up call to remember that and to be in tune with our mortality. I want to feel alive. I want to soak up every beautiful moment in life. I don't want to be numbing on my phone and watching too much TV and just kind of moving from one day to the next in the same way. I want to experience this one life. And activations make you feel that aliveness. Coming up, we will talk to Mimi Bouchard more about the Activations app. But first, let's take a quick break. Let's pause for a minute on the word manifestation, because a lot of people love the word manifestation. A lot of people are very skeptical of the word manifestation. And your app is called Activation, which is, I would say, manifestation adjacent, but also has a very different connotation. So what's your take on manifestation? I think a lot of people say different things about manifestation. And they mean very different things, right? Yeah, it's a word that floats around holding a lot of different meanings. I don't agree with the type of manifestation people talk about where it's like you think it and poof, it appears. You know, that's not, I'm quite a pragmatic person. I do have one foot into more of a connection with my spirituality, but I also very much so one sturdy foot into the pragmatic science-backed world of things. So the type of manifestation that we believe in is simply training your mind to spot opportunities, reprogramming your beliefs, and taking steps that align with that future that you're calling in. I truly believe that when you change your self-image, you change your life. And your self-image changes when you start to listen to visualization audio and really, really focus on this new future self-identity that you would like to adopt. So through the research I've done, and as a questioner, I've done so much research over the years, I'm very curious about all these different beliefs. And something that I found really interesting is that it's kind of, you know, this concept of creating something that you desire through intention and thought and belief. It's kind of the same way that, you know, an atheist might call it the placebo effect. A psychologist might call it self psychology or the reticular activating system A Christian might call it prayer A spiritualist might call it the law of attraction or manifestation It all kind of the same thing kind of said in different words. And what I deeply believe is if you have that intention and that focus and the thoughts and beliefs that align with it, you will create it if it's part of your identity of who you are. Because the most powerful thing you can do is say something positive after the sentence, I'm the kind of person that dot, dot, dot. How do you describe yourself? I'm the kind of person that used to not have fulfilling relationships, but now I have very fulfilling relationships. I used to be the kind of person that was not confident, that had self-image and body issues. And now I'm the kind of person that loves myself fully, trusts my body, and treats myself with so much love. So fill in the blank. That's a huge takeaway that really changed my life. That's so interesting. It reminds me of a conversation I had with a friend that kind of made me sad where this is a person who did yoga many, many times a week for years. And I said something like, well, as a yoga person, you blah, blah, blah. And she said, oh, well, I wouldn't call myself a yoga person. And I was like, why wouldn't you call yourself a yoga person? And she said, oh, well, you know, I don't really do yoga. And I was like, that made me very sad because I'm like, but you do do yoga. And yet you are not claiming that identity for yourself. And you're not letting it penetrate into your sense of identity because that's a very positive thing. Clearly, she felt very positive about it. And so I think that this idea of wanting to identify the future self and then bring that future self into alignment with what is the inner self. It sounds so obvious. It sounds like, well, of course, my future self is going to be like my present self. It's odd to me how often these things can just get wildly far apart, even without you noticing. And so any kind of practice that gets you focused on it is very valuable because it's just strangely easy to drift into space and not realize that you're not grounded. Absolutely. I couldn't agree more. You know, I read this book called Psycho-Cybernetics. It was written by Dr. Maxwell Maltz in the 50s. It's a pretty dense read. But that was one of the most pivotal times in my life when I learned about self-image psychology because in his book, he talks about how, you know, the proof of how you see yourself, you know, really will determine the experience that you have in your life. That's the ultimate form of manifestation is simply starting to see yourself as the kind of person that can be abundant, starting to see yourself as the kind of person that has that inevitably is going to live a big, beautiful, juicy life. You know, just telling yourself these things like, of course, I'm going to feel happy, you know, in the relationships in my life, in my career. And if I don't, then I'm the kind of person that changes that until I do feel good and satisfied. Right. So then you have that feeling of self-efficacy, like if I have the power to change, if I choose to change, if I want to change. Yes, exactly. And just taking that 100 percent responsibility for your life. And I know it's a difficult concept, but it's one of the core concepts in personal development is realizing that, yes, we cannot control the events that happen to us. But there's a calculation E plus R equals O by the great Jack Canfield. The event plus your response equals the outcome. So you're 50% of the outcome equation, right? So the event we can't control, bad things can happen to us. But our response is 50% of the equation, right? So we have a lot more power over the results that occur in our life because of our response, because of the meaning that we can give to things. A way that we often talk about this on the podcast is reframing. And I remember at the beginning when I started learning about reframing, I was like, the facts are the facts. You can't just slap a different label on it and feel differently about it. But now I realize that reframing is extraordinarily powerful. And an example that recently came up was I was doing an interview, like I'm doing an interview with you now, and a lot of sirens went by. Because I live in New York City, so we have, as our producer Chuck can say, we have sirens all the time. And she said, oh, I have to just like catch my breath. It makes me feel kind of panicky when I hear sirens. I really don't like that sound. And I said, why is that? And she said, because it means like something's going terribly wrong or some kind of emergency. And I said, but to me, sirens mean help is on the way. Wow. Yeah. That's a whole different way to think about sirens. And that, of course, is a tiny example. And you're talking about much more transformative change and people's self-conception and behavior. But I think sometimes even a small thing like that, you're like, wow, I really see how that could shift someone's experience with just a phrase. It's surprising. OK, but maybe I have to ask you, OK, we started talking about determination day. Okay, so let's say somebody, they started off strong in the year. They had this big vision for themselves. They're kind of like not following through. And you've looked at this in so many different ways. Do you have a try this at home suggestion? Something practical, concrete that the ordinary person could do as part of their ordinary routine. Your whole thing is like, let's make this part of people's everyday routine. Just something you can do while you're walking the dog. What do you think is one small thing a person could do? or like one small experiment they could try in the next 24 hours. If you could wave a wand and get everybody to do it or try it, what would you suggest? Okay, so this is the number one thing that is a blanket suggestion that would help any single person listening right now. Even if you think that you're clear on what you want in life, you need to get clear on how it feels to have it. So like I mentioned, journaling was a huge, you know, beautiful thing that I love to do. we actually have a whole category in activations called writing activations. So if you want something more guided that can really help you sit down and just listen to these journal prompts with, you know, a certain amount of music to help you kind of get into that energy, we have specifically two writing activations you can choose from about clarity. There is one that is called get clear on what you want and call it in. And then the other one is called take inventory of your life and reset your habits. Each of these are just 13 minutes long. You can choose one or the other. We also have dozens of other writing activations in the app, but just try one of them. Get crystal clear on the feeling of your future self, the feeling that you want to experience every single day in your life. And then the next step is to remind yourself in daily moments, in the mundane daily moments to become that version of you, right? So that's really the simplified approach transformation that I teach that has helped over 100,000 people that use activations. So I would say that and take advantage of our two-week free trial. You don't have to pay for this. You can just go do it, see if it works for you. That's the biggest do this at home example that I'd love everyone to try. Just go do a writing activation and get clear on your future self, and that will inspire you to take the next step and to start rewiring your identity. Yeah, and no surprise, there's a huge amount of research showing the value of writing and this kind of narrative writing, how it helps people get clarity and find meaning and do effective labeling, which is like getting clear on your emotions. Like this is just, there's so many reasons why this is a good idea. So it's a great try this at home. So Mimi, thank you. I'll let you go now. I feel like we could talk all day. This has been such a fascinating conversation. Thank you for having me, Gretchen. And I'm so grateful that you love activations. And I hope that this conversation resonated with your audience. Thank you. So Elizabeth, are you feeling happier? I am. That really felt like the perfect conversation for Determination Day. And now I know even more about manifestation than I did before. I want to try this out for myself. Excellent. Well, that is it for this Determination Day episode of Happier. remember to try this at home. Consider using the Activations app. Mimi is sharing a special limited time offer for our Happier listeners. You'll get a big discount and two-week free trial, but it's only available through our exclusive link. So visit activations.com slash happier or find the link in the show description. Thanks again to Mimi Bouchard and our producer, Chuck Reed. Bye, Grudge. Bye, Elizabeth. From the Onward Project. Hi, Gretchen, Craig Robinson, and my little sister Michelle here. We host a new podcast called IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson. We know you're the queen of giving advice, so we wanted to get a few tips from you. You know, Gretchen, a lot of our listeners are going through some major life changes. What advice do you have for folks who are trying to stay grounded in the midst of major life transitions? Craig and Michelle, I am so happy to be talking to you. Here are a few questions that might help us gain perspective. So consider questions like this. what activities take up my time but are not particularly useful or stimulating for me? Do I spend a lot of time on something that's important to someone else, but is not very important to me? If I could magically change one habit in my life, what would I choose? And here's a question. Would I like to have more time in solitude, restorative solitude? Or would I like to have more time with friends? You know, just thinking about questions like this can help us start to figure out how we might make our lives happier. With greater self-knowledge, we're better able to make hard decisions that reflect ourselves, our own nature, our own interests, our own values. In my own case, I have found that the more my life reflects my nature, the happier I get, and the more grounded I feel when I'm going through a period of major change or transition. For more great advice, search for I Am O with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson wherever you get podcasts. You can listen to Issa Rae on letting go of certain friendships, Kiki Palmer on why disappointment is actually the key to career success, Seth and Lauren Rogan on caring for aging parents, and so many more.